Thickos on TripAdvisor

[bupcakesandcunting]

I usually check reviews about places on Trip Advisor before booking a holiday. I've been having a snoop round this morning for a holiday and went onto Trip Advisor to read the reviews and honestly, some of them look like they've been written by a bear mashing his paws into the keyboard and hitting "send"...

AIBU to disregard reviews by people who moan that "nobode understand ENGLISH" "no chips/salad just greek food" "wayter rude" or should I be giving them the same attention as the others?

"water park is a must do :D but dont go hungover and fall asleep in the sun:D:D"

"We were told it was all ytou can eat but by the time u had finished ur first plate they had stopped serving - even tho to be fair i couldnt eat anymore!"

"the bbq nite,15euro's p/p abit steep for wot you get and the pole dancer was crap."

" A garden wall had been demolished to make space for our room - the remains of this were left in the cupboard under the sink"

"I got my drink Spiked! spent the nyt in hospital on a drip and had 5 police cars escort me to the hospital, was spiked with LSD! But, it didnt spoil my holiday, and we met sum wicked ppl out there!" You don't say!

"wolfie the rep bit weird at first buit he grows on ya.... WORD OF ADVISE WATCH THE LITTLE PIKEYS" ?????

"if your not up for a laugh then dnt bother, if youve got a sense of humor and dnt mind getting spayed wiv shaving foam then it is def the trip for you, was the best day of the week!!!"

I'll end with a challenge:

"Back to the Plaza though the girls that were staying there were among the highest quality you can find on this planet and 'V' the barman reckons that there is no woman he can't charm the pants off of, so ladies please prove him wrong and don't forget i will be there next year around the end of June so go then and i will be able to laff as he get shot down in flames."

"no complaints at all,10 out of 10 for everything,only complaint we had was the fancy dress shop and its big violent smelly owner who robbed my friend of 25 euros and when we confronted him he threatened to slap my friend(julie),also beware of young girls entering this shop because he is known for his touchung up skills,he ruined our stay,made us feel like we wanted to go home away forever. "

The next morning we went down for breakfast and was shown to our allocated table and waitress 'the dreaded jackie' the breakfast wasnt that good small with what i would call a slice of fat oh sorry bacon the waitress jackie does not appear to have any waitressing skills or any manners but surely the management must know this as there are other bad reviews on here about jackie, the saturday night we went down for dinner and on our table was a saucer full of mint sauce these dishes were randomly scattered around the restaurant,we ordered the starter and were asked by another guest can he use the minnt sauce on our table as the waiter he asked for some pointed to our table to get it, we obliged but told the guest thet he could keep it as all his table were using it. when we ordered our main meal we too wanted some mint sauce , we asked jackie BIG MiSTAKE she then proceeded to go to the same table as we get the mint sauce and tried to put it on our table spoon in the dish we asked her could we have fresh as we didnt know if any of them guests could have had the spoon in thier mouths,jackie told us she had just put a clean spoon in we told her that she didnt as we watched her pick it of the table the mint sauce had bits of food in it from the others guests using it ,we asked for fresh and she said she would get some from the kitchen 10 minutes later another waitress came out with another mint sauce again with bits in we did not use it by this time jackie ignored us and refused to take our plates we had to ask another waitress to clear the table and get our desserts jackie would not serve us and kept giving us the evil eye come on management sort your staff out how many other people does she do this to ? we were able to tell her but your other guests the older people may feel a little intimidated will not go again for this reason!!!!!!

Jeezus, that's a lot of hassle for some mint sauce

Here she is again....

'....by the waitress from hell.......she goes by the name of Jackie and is unprofessional,rude and glares at you in a menacing way. Has the hotel manager ever heard of charm school??

I attempted to sit down at a table with our friends only to be pounced on by Jackie and marched off to her table, seemly we had broken some rule about sitting in your allotted seat. She also demanded to know the whereabouts of the other four people who had shared are table the evening before, looking around to check she didn't have an Anglepoise lamp I informed her I didn't know. She returned and threw a plate of toast down followed by a jug of coffee but no milk, still glaring at me. I took a deep breath and challenged her by,saying she had a serious attitude problem and was a very rude person, she didn't even flinch and returned with a "cooked breakfast" tasted awful. Dinner that night was even worse, how a cook or chef could plate up burnt and blacken lamb is beyond me. Sunday morning I made sure I was not sitting at Jackie's table and was served by a very pleasant lady who when I told I was scared of Jackie replied "We all are too".'

I'm starting to like the sound of Jackie.

That evening the seven of us decided to try the food at £10 per head. WHAT A BIG MISTAKE!!!!!!! they advertise it as home cooked?????the starter of soup flavour was only known when it arrived on the table cold!!!! the vegetables were out of a tin the mashed potato was disgracefull probably instant, the gravey was out of a box and the meat was processed slices. And as for desert which your coice when pre-ordering is HOT, COLD OR ICE CREAM, I chose cold which turned out to be part of a STALE SWISS ROLL with SPRAY CREAM and a very non tasting juice.

Yummy.

if youve got a sense of humor and dnt mind getting spayed wiv shaving foam then it is def the trip for you

I am making quite a spectacle of myself in the office as a result of this one. Who would have thought a missing 'r' could do so much!

I'm really cross with you lot - my kitchen needs cleaning and I've sat here for the past half an hour crying and hiccuping...

?Fab Holiday - Magaluf is the best?
5 of 5 stars
Date of review: 29 Apr 2010

Stayed here in 2008.
Was one of the best holidays ive been on.
The hotel was nice..just the people opposite stole our keys, took my mates camera, ghds and other valuables.

Oh dear, but yet its the best holiday she has been on!

"Ok, I'm not an art lover but the Sistine Chapel was not what I was expecting. It's a shame that such an interesting ceiling had to be placed on top of such an ugly room.

I also wish the front wall matched the ceiling! "

Porto

I really must stop looking at these. All inclusive... now I accept that on an all inclusive you should expect a certain standard of food, and have every right to complain if it really is poor - but surely if it is that bad there comes a point where you say enough is enough, although we have already 'paid' we will forget the all inclusive crap and buy something. Not these people apparently :

'we where quite shocked when we the first day should eat at the lunch-buffet: There where about 10-15 birds inside and outside, and as soon as there where nobody at the buffet, the birds came and eat from the buffet.Several of us even saw the birds on the food, eating, and doing what humans do at the toilet...It is discusting to eat from a buffet togheter with birds, and you can get sick. So, why not eat somewhere else? Well, we are "all inclusive"-guests, and have allready paid for the lunch-buffet'

So instead of paying a couple of quid for a decent lunch they ate the birdshit buffet. This lot are even worse:

'Went all inclusive.....The food was not suitable for european travellers. No menu for children, as a result my young daughter ended up in hospital for four days with serious dehydration.'

Hospitalised because there was no kid's menu - BUY the child some food FFS

Also and @ porto. Re the gladiator - if anyone is in Rome watch out for the rather mature 'lady' gladiator outside the Pantheon - possibly a relative of Dillie's on the Italian side of the family. Desperately trying to find a picture of her....

I was once asked by someone at work if I thought there'd be 'European food' when he went to Spain maybe he wrote the above revie....

at the hospitalised bairn btw!

How did the child get dehydrated by not eating at the buffet?

@omnishambles - I wondered that as well - perhaps it was something to do with lack of food and not actually dehydration, or as she wasn't eating she wasn't drinking enough (as you tend to do the two together). Either way can't believe the parents didn't buy the child something to eat (or drink) - don't think they did as they don't say ended up spending loads of cash on extra food.

This was quite a well written negative review about what sounds like an absolute pisstake of a hotel but starts:
"We are a family of 4, myself, my wife a 3 year old and an 11 month old baby. We got stuck in the terribley snowy conditions on the M40 on Saturday 18th December 2010. We urgently needed to book a last minute hotel that could cater for a family and we could get to in the snow, disappoiningly the nearest Premier Inn had burned down."

Same hotel:

"room 7 dog loo view only in there 10 seconds room 26 freezin cold n june disabled bathroom come coldstore mega tiny sink and massive tap, no plug, toilet rol holder light hangin off the wall. Put case on wardrobe caked in dust. thought there was a wake on the staff all had long gobs on except for one lad on desk. Food was fairly good? but waitress couldnt wait to swoop on our emty plates etc. Asked for heat in room got a heater granted hot water takes 5mins everytime. It felt like i was complaining but i expect these things as the norm in a place charging 100 quid a night pay before you stay never done that before. breakfast was a joke to all of us 8 others waited half hour. The waitresses had a gob on again i was going to kick off but was restrained by wife didnt show for breakfast next day left key in door and got off as i would have ripped someones head off. beer garden is three tables in a tiny courtyard should of realised everywhere else was packed this was empty on footie night "

Not sure what having a gob on is?

He sounds a charmer.

Having lived and worked in Greece for 20 odd years I have had the pleasure of having to deal with lots of these people....

The questions you get asked and things you hear and see over the years are just breath-taking.

Has anyone else noticed how many people struggle with spelling 'disgraceful' and 'disgusting'? They seem to fox most people on these revies.

revies is making me giggle every time.

I know, me too. I am determined to shoe-horn it into every post.

(revie)