LOOK!! READ !!!!!!

[Hbouquet]

THIS MUMSNET WEBSITE IS THE BIGGEST GATHERING OF VULGAR, CLASS OBSESSED, SELFISH, INSECURE, VILE EXCUSES FOR PEOPLE, I PITY YOUR CHILDREN.

LISTEN TO YOU COMPLAINING ABOUT CHILD ALLOWANCE, £44,000 IS STILL WAY TOO HIGH!!, HAVE YOU NOT SPARED A THOUGHT FOR THE PEOPLE WHO ARE ACTUALLY IN REAL POVERTY?, WHO REALLY NEED STATE HELP....NO, YOU JUST DRIVE PAST IN YOUR 4X4'S WITH YOUR SPOILT, OBESE, ALLERGY RIDDEN SMUG KIDS ON THE WAY TO GET YOUR CHAI LATTE AND M&S PANINI FOR LUNCH, IT JUST GOES TO SHOW THE BLINKERED IGNORANCE AND SELFISHNESS OF MODERN DAY WOMEN IN ENGLAND, LIVING YOUR ENCLAVE LIKE LIFESTYLE, TOTALLY DETACHED FROM HUMANITY, INSECURE 'IM ALRIGHT JACK' MENTALITY, BITCHY, SCHEMING, CLASS OBSESSED, MATERIAL OBSESSED, YOU REALLY MAKE ME SICK TO THE CORE, THE LOT OF YOU.

JUST LOOK AT THE FACES OF THE PEOPLE WHO RUN THIS WEBSITE, LOOK AT YOURSELF IN THE MIRROR, DO YOU SEE LOVE AND HUMAN WARMTH?......NO, YOU SEE CONTORTED, COLD, MEAN, MISERLY FACES, EYES AND MOUTH SCREWED UP, FALSE LOOKING CONTRIVED EXPRESSIONS, A LOOK WHICH SHOWS THESE PEOPLE FOR WHO THEY REALLY ARE, SELF LOATHING, UNHAPPY, INSECURE WORST OF THE WORST, LIFES REAL LOOSERS.

I think it was the Fantasy Middle Class Soft Play Centre thread that tipped him/her over the edge. But what he/she doesn't realise is that if there is one thing we specialise in, it's laughing at ourselves. It' called irony OP It can be hard to decipher when you busy being all puffed up with self-righteousness. Don't feel bad. Have a cupcake.

Are we still going strong? Did BTP share the cupcakes nicely - after all, I did say they were for all the wunnerful mumsnetters, and though she is, of course, by far the most wunnerful, the rest of you are pretty wunnerful and cupcake-worthy too.

And no - I don't think I should 'give Fellatio one - I don't think I am that sort of a girl!!

I want the last cupcake, don't go offering it to the riff-raff.

Oh lovely can I have one , are they from the Hummingbird Bakery or Fortnum and Mason?

Yey, the thread made it to classics. The troll op is going to be soooo pissed

They are fresh from my own kitchen, piglet - and I even made them myself - cook's day off, you know!

- The OP can now be laughed at for evermore!

I thought a chai latte was a type of dog.

um num num even better , can I have one with my hot chocolate (Cadbury of course) and my marshallows.

hbouquet - I think you need to be totally honest now...

You're not completely happy, are you?

Having a bad day, OP? Haven't read the whole thread yet. Did she come back?

By the way I've never had a chai latte or a 4x4. And I don't like paninis.... And that's the funniest OP I've read today!

You are just so insightful and sensitive, MadAboutQuavers. What was it about the OP that gave it away??

May I also have a cupcake? The maid made me the wrong sort of latte. My nerves are all shot to pieces now.

I'll have to have her killed, naturally.

Well, I can honestly say I've never before read a thread that has made me so angry and resentful. Everyone is raving on about various teas and coffees and coffee outlets, yet there is a serious issue here that needs addressing.

THERE IS NO STARBUCKS IN THIS PART OF THIS BLOODY COUNTRY AND I WANT A FUCKING LATTE NOW!

As you were.

Yay! I thought this thread had been deleted. Life in the enclave was getting dull.
I am disappointed about my lost post carefully analysing the OP's rant I had just conceded that there was some faint merit in a couple of the OP's points and rewritten the post accordingly. And now my scholarly analysis is lost forever. Boo!

Has hbouquet left us again? I thought we were going to be such good friends :(.. I mean...

I THOUGHT WE WERE GOING TO BE SUCH GOOD FRIENDS!

To the poster who asked what food our dog is on - the answer is whatever food is not put out of her reach. She is a labrador and will eat anything - and I do mean anything.

Her own poo
Cow poo
Sheep poo
Horse poo
15 mince pies
5 salmon steaks
2 steaks
My knitting
Umpteen wooden spoons
The poo spade
Blackberries
Dh's raspberry cream turnover
Dh's wensleydale
Ds3's marsbar
My herb plants
The fence
My raspberry canes
Picture frames
Books
Watercolour paints
The post
Every soft toy she's been given
Rotting animal entrails she found in a field
Phone charger
Kitchen knives
Several washing-up brushes
The cat's food - any time she can get upstairs
A whole pack of Greenums tablets

Oh - and currently Royal Canin dogfood (just to fill in the gaps).

I am sure there is more, but dh and I can't remember any more right now!

I'm so excited - very soon I'm going to go to my very expensive, class obsessed materialistic David lloyd gym in our second car (Nissan Micra, I guess that's ok as a second car?) and have a swim followed by a LATTE. Hooray, I've 'arrived' at mumsnet

Coolma - misread your message and thought the gym was IN the car, and you were swimming In the latte!

I'm a cappucino girl (minus the chocolate) myself... never tried a chai latte, and wondering what exactly a FALSE LOOKING CONTRIVED expression is? Isn't that a double negative, or am I just being SO MIDDLE CLASS about it?

Bugger, must sort out my grammar..

OF COURSE MARY AND CONNOR IN EASTENDERS NEVER HAD A THING- CONNOR WAS MARYS DAD!

THIS THREAD WAS A VERY THERAPEUTIC READ

Wasn't Mary the punk rocker with the little girl called Annie

Lay off the OP you lot. S/he's being a silly twonk so we don't have to. It's like a service. And we don't have to pay for it. What larks.

Beertricks, are you at a reading group? (It is Beertricks who is off now doing sumpin' smug and middle class, yes?

I'm just back from mine. [preens].

Yes coolma she was a Mary too - they had to call Connors daughter Mary as well though because she was Oirish. Awful episode - that'd be the one the Beeb had to apologise for.