Right, here we go:
It's essential that you organise every aspect of your wedding whilst at work. Let interns and assistants help, as a wedding brings joy to everyone it touches. Use your company credit card for the three foot ice carving of your initials in a heart, as your personal cards will have been maxed out by now.
Advise people that they will be kneeling at the church for a blessing (or wherever you get married, ESPECIALLY if it's not a church) and they must all bring their own cushions for this. Mention that it would be nice if they were colour coordinated with the wedding's theme colours, as 'most people are doing this'. (Have a tantrum and name and shame on the day if anyone dares not comply with this little request.)
Only Pimms will be served, as that's your favourite drink.
Which brings us to the wedding's theme colours - Pimm's is the inspiration here, lemon, lime, violent orange. (Reflected in aforesaid cushions, please) hese colours make you glow - you're an 'autumn'.
Advise your 10 closest friends that you will be holding auditions for bridesmaids, and set them a series of tasks to complete. Announce the three winners a week before the wedding, so that the dressmaker has time to ensure that the dresses you've chosen (in lemon, lime and violent orange, remember?) fit each of them perfectly, even though they're all 'winters' and the colours make them look like they've been dead a week.
As guests arrive for the reception, hand each a sealed envelope with their table number inside, so no one knows anyone they'll be sitting with, as it will be so much fun for them to 'mix it up and meet new people'.
Make sure every guest has at least one ex present, as you want to 'share the love' and help everyone build bridges with the past. Naturally some of your friends will share exes, so when you ask each guest to stand up and say something nice about each person in the room that they've slept with or dated (ask them to clarify this so everyone's clear) things will be a little weird. Especially when one of your cousins is mentioned by about 45 blokes.
Invite your scary, vindictive and non-drinking boss that everyone hates, and ensure that he/she and your workmates, who will be terrified and drink A LOT, are the only people who DO sit together, so that they can bond during out of work hours. Ensure that your work colleagues' off-the-cuff comments (about aforesaid scary boss, of course) are recorded for posterity on video, and share them with the whole office at your first team meeting when back from honeymoon. The nice comments about the colleagues they've slept with will be both surprising to the team, and especially humorous.
During the wedding speeches, tell everyone that, in the spirit of true feminism, newDH is taking YOUR name.
I expect a full report.