D'ya ever wonder how many pine needles you can hand pick from a carpet?

[devondoris]

Look, look! Not only am I here, but I've started a new thread!

TKB, great news about the wedding. Don't feel sheepish, I was about to post that he should move his holiday

HM, you and me both dear. I am now allowing myself wine 3 nights a week instead of 7.

Triplets I don't know if this helps or not, but I would just like you to know that you are not alone on the DH front.

One of our family's sons died very suddenly. A case of bye mum,off out the door and that was the last they saw of him. He was 16 and knocked down by a driver on the motorway(long story).

Her husband has drunk a lot since his death and has even moved into their sons old room. He won't talk about it to anyone and just covers all his feelings with drink, I'd guess you would call it 'numbing'.

He is a wonderful guy,but is one of those men who consider themselves too 'manly' to discuss anything.

I think that you have done a wonderful job,getting Dh to the Doctors and shows he obviously wants help with things and you are open to how he is feeling,which is important.

However,it must be another worry for you on top of everything else you have to deal with,so I hope that you are looking after yourself and getting the support you need too.

What I am trying to say is, in my own rambling way,is that it is totally understandable after losing Matthew and even if its not the best way,its how alot of other people in your situation try to cope.

You both seem like a very loving couple and I am sure that you will be able to work through this together and find some level of peace.

I don't usually stick my nose in when it comes to Matthew as I feel too new to comment and don't want you thinking 'God,who does she think she is?!!!' but I do think about you all alot.x.

Triplets, so sorry you are having such a hard time. Harry sounds a bit like my dad was. I say that he was an alcoholic, although he wasn't drunk during the day, he just couldn't go to bed at night without having had a considerable amount to drink. His drinking seriously affected his mood and I think is very much to blame for many negative things and memories of my childhood. Underneath it all he wasn't a very happy person but wasn't able to face the things that made him unhappy.... I think Harry may be in a chicken and egg situation with the health problems (and whatever else) leading him to drink and the drinking making the health problems worse.
Well done for sending him to the doctors and for writing the letter. Hopefully the doctor will ask him leading questions and be able to help.
If he starts to work his problems out you will probably have a much happier home, easier evenings and less troublesome teenagers in a few years!

However, your dcs will be fine, from what I read you are a good, strong mother and even if the teen years are tough the love, support and secure base you have given them will carry them through safely.

Even if Matthew has been 'gone' for the same lenght of time he was 'here', it doesn't make his existence any less or his importance any less or him memory any less. Keep your memories safe and they will stay with you.

Mars I have a little question for you. A friend told me about a friend who couldn't breastfeed because the babies mouth was too small to latch properly onto big nipples. Is this possible or has she been failed by poor quality help?

TKB, why is it that twins are supposed to be slower with language development? We have 2 languages to add to our complications.

Just a quickie before the school run! To al of you who have sent me a message, thank you, its good to read someone else point of view, often makes me stop and look at things from a slightly different angle! I am trying now to just carry on as normal, I have become very good at putting things in little boxes in my mind, opening them up when I need to, if that makes sense. At the end of the day I am sure all will be fine and work its way out, I know I have been through the worst, nothing that ever happens can be as awful as losing Matthew, how we survived the first 3/4 years I dont know, I actually wrote a diary for the first six months, I read it for the first time a few weeks ago, I couldnt believe the pain of the things I had put down, awful, so awful. Anyway brighter days are always around the corner, and on that happy note off I must go to collect the darlings!

Leo, not sure. Perhaps that because they have each other and can understand each other, whether by their own language or just because they spend their lives together, so they don't feel the need to communicate with others or they expect others to understand them in the same way as their twin does. Or maybe I'm talking out of my a*se and it's just one of those old wives' tales people trot out about twins and I've fallen for it .

I've just had an extremely frustrating half hour. Promised DTs they could go to the park with their dolls and buggies but time has slipped past without me noticing. Anyway, DT2 says at 2.00 - I want to go to the park. It's only 2 minutes round the corner (at my pace, 10 mins at theirs ), so I thought ok, we can do that (have to leave to pick up DD1 by 2.45). But then DT1 announced she'd poo'd her knickers again (4th time in a row - grrr), then we had to put hats, scarves, gloves, coats on, then find the 'right' dollies, then put them into the buggies with the straps done up exactly right. By the time we were out of the house it was 25 minutes later and there was no way we had time to get there and back. Poor dog was all excited and I've just pushed them all back in the house in frustration and annoyance and shoved them in front of a DVD and come on here to vent . Why oh why does everything take so long? And while I'm at it, why do they all have to ask me the same question, all expecting an answer. So, for example, on any journey, I get asked 'are we nearly there yet' 3 times in quick succession. But if I don't reply to each one individually, I get major upset. Not annoying as a one off but every time and every question... Oh the joys .

LG&T - she is nearly 14 months old, can you believe it!! She is very gorgeous, very smily, but also very much a DAddy's girl at the moment, she puts her arms out for him whenever he is near and Mummy must wont do!! She is crawling and so wants to walk but not quite there yet.

FG - I have not had a drop of booze since New Years Eve - can you believe it. DH has forced me into his booze free January routine. Last year I refused because DD had only been born 6 weeks prior and as I had just had 9 months off it, I said no way. Still we are on day 9 and I seem to be bearing up - although I have had a stinking cold and have just been to the docs and been diagonosed with sinusitis so I think the booze was keeping me healthy!!

I have only had half a glass of champagne and a few sips of beer in NINE BLOODY MONTHS .

Dont worry Egg - get the champers on ice to toast the arrival of your DTs!!

Leo........... Piss poor advice! Grrrrrrrrrrrrr!!!!!!!!! Just text/email me when your friends need advice! Grrrrrrrrrrrr

Tripley.... honey you all feel like you've been part of my family for years (in a good way) so just jump in because your opinion is as valuable as all of ours.

I keep seeing other multiple mums across the board and can't seem to rope them in I reckon you lot scare them. Couldn't possibly be me!

Am losing more and more PC time as DS1 gets into his GCSE course work and DD1 needs to Facebook and MySpace and MSN and Bebo! Sigh.....................

Yep I feel like Tripley has always been here . She just slotted right in!

Thanks am very tempted to crack open some red to be honest. I mean WHAT harm can it do now??????? Just don't want to go into labour and delivery smelling of booze .

Have got champers in fridge ready for DTs arrival though.

Awwww Guys!!!

So glad you feel that I pushed slotted right in

Drink it lady, the midwife wont mind as long as you let her have a swig

Tripley you have been here forever havent you? Just like Momma, part of the furniture

I've just opened a bottle of sauvignon blanc if anyone fancies white tonight, I'm celebrating a victory at work that has taken a massive weight off my mind, plus DH has finally taken the plunge and told his boss he's applying for jobs in sheffield, where my parents live, which will mean I can be a domestic slut goddess

dingdong, ding dong

at lack of booze from HM and FG, I thought I could always rely on you two

Who is Jackie Clune? And why was Egg so in love?
What have I missed?!!!!!

So sad to see that thread I am a shorty and I had back problems and I felt really pushed into having a reduction. I hope it is not scary medical pressure that has made up her mind as doctors can sometimes be ..well.....Grrrrrrrr...

My heart goes out to her totally,what a horrible time for her,very upsetting.

you need to concentrate girl, step away from the darts

Darn those beer-bellied men!! (and women)

Jackie Clune is a comedienne, and there was a prog about her and her DH/DP when she was expecting her triplets. She had a DD who was v young when she found out she was expecting too. Anyway it was a documentary on Sky (might have been on "normal" tv too) that followed her pregnancy and birth and the first few months. It was very funny as well as very interesting. I watched it before I ever was expecting DTs and found it highly entertaining! She has written a book about her triplet experience as well but have not read that.

Tonight is a drinking night for DH so I think I may sneak a bit now I have the go ahead!

Oh and Tripley, although DH and I went through a darts phase a few years ago and watched it all, I am getting peed off with it as Escape to the Country is not on at the mo at 2:45pm on BBC2 due to the darn DARTS .

I miss escape to the country too!! but trying to be very manly about it!! (and watch all the re-runs on cable).

Oh I know who she is now!!!!

I did not read the book but I saw the programme!!! Wow!! she was good!! Didn't she manage to take her little ones on a plane?

She did have three adults with her though

Meeoooowwwww!!!! LOL

AAAAAAAAAAAAAARRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH HHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

It has taken DT1 1 hour and 45 mins to settle tonight. She wouldn't sleep with the light off but wanted to play because the light was on. So I sat on the step! She screamed and screamed and screamed. Bribery didn't work. Inducements didn't work. (Thoughts of extreme violence other kinds didn't work).

She told me: she's not my best friend (fair enough), that I should get the plane back to Jamaice (if only) and that she was going to get Luke (her favourite boy babysitter) to tell me off.

Finally, finally, finally she fell asleep! Why did she have to inherit my stubborn streak? Why???????????????????

Would open wine but it's now all finished. Hmmmmmmmmmmmmmm still got some Port though!

Have you tried the money chart Mars?

A money chart on the bedroom door with a fixed amount for the night(If they are being little rotters start quite high so you have lots to remove, I think mine started off with a fiver)

Show them the chart before they go to bed and get them really excited about it all and explain how it works.Then every time they get out of bed/scream/cry/shout remove some pennies from the chart.

As soon as my lot realised what happened they soon shut up became quiet!! i also added pennies if they had a good night too.

money chart? My wee weapons of mass destruction? They are 3.11 and don't know about money. Also... have never been successful with charts and things... they kind of need dedication. I was thinking of offering adoption as an incentive... but can't remember who for... them or me!!!!!!!!!!!