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Found out yesterday we're having twins and I'm terrified

54 replies

UCH12 · 05/04/2016 12:03

Hi all,

My wife and I found out yesterday that through IVF we are having twins.

We already have a wonderful 3 and a half year old miracle and she is everything to me and us.

To be honest I'm going through mixed feelings of shock, upset, but mostly fear of not being able to look after my family well enough financially and not giving our wonderful daughter all the love she deserves. I'm terrified. House, car, buying 2 of everything.

My wife wanted to put 2 embryos because after failed treatments she couldn't face doing it again. I don't think she really considered twins as a realistic option.

It is what it is and we have to accept it.

I regret using 2 embryos. It sounds awful. I feel guilty writing it.

This isn't how I should feel when we're lucky enough to finally get pregnant but I'm upset and it may sound awful, but part of me wishes we weren't. I didn't want twins. At all.

The thought of duel crying screaming feeding etc etc and all that goes with it is terrifying me.

I can't be happy and both of us have different views.

I'm in a bit of a daze and scared that i won't be able to handle the responsibility or enjoy it. I feel guilty as I shouldn't feel like this.

Anyone feel the same regards to twins being a surprise? Especially when you already have a child?

I haven't told anyone yet as only at 7 weeks so very alone right now.

OP posts:
Are your children’s vaccines up to date?
DorothyHarris · 13/04/2016 18:38

Don't be too hard on yourself OP. Its still very very early. I found out it was twins on 30th September (forever etched on my memory haha) and I didn't really acknowledge it until after Christmas. I wouldn't talk about it with anyone, cried quite often and generally felt really worried and stressed out.
Be kind to yourself and talk to your wife.

UCH12 · 14/04/2016 16:11

Thanks. I am talking to her, and she's being very understanding. She feels guilty as it was her decision to have 2 embryos.

Can't get my head around it.

OP posts:
GrimmauldPlace · 14/04/2016 19:30

As has been said before, one embryo could have split and you would be in the same situation. There's no need to feel any guilt at all!

Shock, yes. Panic, probably. Worry, I think anyone would. But guilt, definitely not.

Lumpylumperson · 15/04/2016 03:17

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

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