Under 1s twin post-natal group? Should we have one? Who's in?!

[PeelingmyselfofftheCeiling]

The antenatal group is nearly full, any graduates fancy joining forces to compare

No local twin mums here for me either, i've been to the twins club a few times and i've either been the only one there, the only one with babies under 3, the only non-childminder, or the only one whose solution to twins was for both her and husband to quit working and do everything together... always. [hmmm] Might give up on it now!

Very jealous of the move to Chiswick, I miss London and SW would be a lovely area to move to. I sort of know quite a few twin mummies in that region having done our TAMBA course closer to London and there seems to be a good network so I'm sure you'll be able to hook into it quickly.

Ha ha at 'so desperate I asked a health visitor' Dreaming! I know the feeling. Tbh when it comes to multiples and reflux and anything complicated they just don't seem to have much to say. Having said that I'm now doing my own research as I'm not 100 per cent sure about something our paed consultant told me about weaning, so I think as you get more confident with your twins you feel happier questioning medical staff anyhow. (Gluten intolerance and weaning premature babies, in case anyone knows anything about it!).

And yes, we're 9 months actual so that's 7 months corrected, so crawling would be on the early side if ds nails it soon. His dad was apparently walking at 9 months so I'm living in fear of that day, the playpen went up today!

Um, where in Hampshire???? Not that I am or anything.

Odd, I just lost a post so this may get posted twice:
Dreaming - Where in lancashire - my DH is from Oldham and his parents live in Rochdale, anywhere near you?

I haven't joined our local twin club either as its in Fulham which although only a few miles is tricky on public transport and I hate driving in London. So we've sort of got our own. Another source of twin contacts is the health visiting team who put all new twin mumsin touch with us, and the local childrens centres, they have a monthly twin playgroup where I met one mum.

This is helping - I was a bit about moving to West London being a confirmed Eastender, but it'll be lovely to meet other parents and I've got a few very good mates round there. Now just have to work out where we can actually afford to live...

Dream get in contact with those mums. They wont think you're a stalker, they're probably stuck at home wondering whether they should contact that nice mum they met . And at your mate who said her singleton fed so much it was like having twins. Really? REALLY?!!!! I think I'd have head butted her.

ceevee, kind of, I'm further Oop North, near Lancaster.

And i didn't trust my memory at all any more that bigboobs is Hampshire because I had in my head that peeling is on a Scottish island which doesn't sound likely to me now . Luckily having nothing better to do at 3:40am (oh come on boys, blooming sleep!) I have been.hunting back and she is I think .

Thanks for all the nice words! I've been ill these last few days, and we've had a busy weekend, hence my absense.
We went to the cranio person today:it was not all in my head, DT2 has a 7 mm diffenernce and they recommend treating it from 6mm. So, if the insurance covers it, she'll be getting a helmet (I checked online, it should be covered but they need to check themselves as well). If not we'll just grow her bangs:)

In other news: I started weaning! I can really recommend the BLW route, saves so much hassle! We went the puree route with DS, and this is so much easier. Definitely worth a try.

Rednellie: re the sleeping: my DH was not dealing very well with all the coming and going in our bed, so I kicked him out we mutually decided that if he was getting cranky he should move to the couch. Works really well actually, he gets more sleep and I don't feel as if I have another cranky toddler in the bed as irritated :)

I haven't been to a twin group either, I am a member of a local one but there's nothing happening ever. No meetups, nothing. I'll just have to moan on here.

Hello beyoglu

we have crossed paths on a couple of otehr threads I think!

We also used to have what I call the 'witching hour', seems to go with the territory, but with dd1 wasn't any different to teh rest of the day, and dd2, well, she was a singleton so easier to deal with, than two crying babies and one set of hands! It does get better, mine did between 13-15 weeks.
And do not worry about routines too much, I didn't bother til around 3 months as they were too unsettled but now it is very simple, bath (when I have the energy, about 4 times a week), feed, bed. They are now brilliant and will settle themselves (18 weeks today). We don't have a rigid time, but it's usually between 7.30 and 8.30, I try to take my cues as to when they're tired.

BB3 welcome back, glad to hear you have nice holidays.

and cevee thanks for asking, We are fine where we are, but know a few people who cannot go back to their homes as deemed unsafe, whole villages ahve been virtually closed down, businesses, shops...so sad. We've been collecting stuff at school and will be doing a fundraising fair, trying to help out, we do feel very lucky, just a few miles can make such a big difference to one's life. 9 months!! is that allowed? I am NOT looking forward to the mobile stage, and dtg is already half way through rolling over...

Welcome back peeling, any twin mum is a supermum, and as rednellie says, it's not like we have a choice is it??

where are you off to on holiday [nosey]

there are no baby groups at all here, let alone twin ones! the only other twin mum I know has 4year old twins and they are in nutsery... all this talk about London has made me homesick (it was only my 'home' for 10 years but I feel I left a piece of me there)...I haven't been in 18 months and I can't wait, but it won't be anytime soon ...

good to hear about the weaning going well wheresmyearplugs, I'm thinking of doing a combination of purees and blw. My pead here in Italy told me to start at the 4 month mark with a few spoonfuls of pureed fruit but I am totally ignoring her, it's been so hard to get my milk supply to do almost ebf that I am sticking with it as long as I can til 6 months thank you very much!! Hope your insurance will ok the helmet, good to have a solution though!

LOL at all the grumpy dhs, well mine has a irritating habit of falling asleep on sofa anyway, then joining me in bed later in the night. Now that the twins only wake up once and rarely at the same time, he doesn't even stir!!

on the news front, I did my first ever school run with all four this morning, and the girls got to school on time, dressed, hair tidy and with all the required equipment (I think...) so feeling rather smug right now....but have t do the same tomorrow morning...babies crying got to go, have a nice day everyone!!

good memory Dream! sleep deprivation has obviously not diminished your brain power! Yes, I am in Hampshire - near Southampton. There is a twins club there but I have not contacted them or joined - I know I should, not really sure why I haven't - oh yes, now I know - because I am usually too tired to function be able to hold a pleasant conversation with strangers! But I will contact them soon.

Spill then Peeling - where roughly are you? Nod once for near Soton and twice for not near

I don't know any other twin Mums. I bumped in to one twin mummy when i was pregnant in Sainsbury's car park and we swapped numbers (weird?) and we text a few times but her DTs were poorly and then I was unable to move due to size of bump and now it feels like too much time has passed since I met her for me to contact her again.

My HV said there are other twin mums in my area that she can put me in touch with, so I should probably take her up on that.

Wherearemy, good news re DT2 in that they can do something to help. Sorry if I am being a bit dim, but why do you need insurance is it not covered on the NHS? Good luck with getting it sorted, let us know how you get on. DH being another cranky toddler! Things have taken a bit of a backward step here with DD's sleep - she has started waking again in the night - DH has to deal with it usually as I am in the DTs room - and because he is so tired he just scoops her up and puts her in bed with him (our lovely superkingsize bed that I never get to sleep in anymore!) - which she loves. I say a backward step, I don't personally think it is and I love night time snuggles - as long as getting her to sleep in her own bed again when things are a bit more settled is not too much of a battle!

Beyoglu, your DTs are almost same age as mine (6 weeks) and your feeding patten sounds very much like mine! The first 2-3 weeks the DTs tricked me in to thinking things were going to be so much easier than I thought they wold be - 4 hours between feeds day and night. But this has now dropped to three hours if I am lucky and no difference day or night. They settle well after midnight but not before. I am desperate for the time they sleep for a good chunck at night and not a max of three hours! when will this be?! perhaps I will ask the HV I will just have to wait patiently! We also don't have a bath in the night time routine as yet, just PJs on downstairs just before they want a feed thats around 9pm - then milk upstairs and in sleeping bag. So no set time - did try this but I just ended up spending my whoile evening in their room settling them - so figured may as well do that in the comfort of my front room watching telly and drinking wine

Blimey I have written a lot. happy wednesday everyone - off to gathher up all the nappies from the night - usually about 8!!!!! just for the night time!!!! bloody hell.

I was forgetting the best news of all: I am now the proud owner of a brand new shiny touran . Totally love it! even if it means no holiday this year

Morning!

dreaming, hope it gets better soon with the crying! They do say there's a peak at 8 weeks... one day we're all going to have cheery 4/5/6 month olds with no reflux issues, am I right?

Talking of twins clubs, I know there's a really active one in Wandsworth (I gave birth in St George's which is in Wandsworth) - they have lots of meetups and sales and stuff. I'm a bit further SE in Croydon - I made a twin friend in the shops a couple of weeks ago, hers are 10w older than mine and she gives me great advice!
Someone mentioned the uselessness of HVs with twins and reflux - WORD - mine advised me to try Colief which you have to put in the bottle 30 minutes before you give it, and was talking about holding the baby upright for an hour after feeding. Ahahahaha. I'm set up here so I can get a bottle ready in about 30 seconds. My twin friend suggested a) putting gripe water in the milk and b) propping her up on pillows for about 20 minutes after a feed. Magic! She still grizzles a bit but can get back off to sleep, which means I get back to sleep. Oh how we will celebrate when the reflux stops. If it doesn't clear up within about 2 or 3 feeds of the 12 week mark I'm taking her back to the shop!

Well today is going to be busy - we are getting our bedroom soundproofed - our house is a semi but next door is 2 flats and our bedroom shares a wall with their living room. This used to bother my OH when he could hear the telly on at like 2am - I've been either sleeping in the kids' room or in the blacked out spare room since the wee ones arrived so I don't know if it would bother me now although I doubt it very much! Still I suppose there will come a time when the wee ones can sleep unsupervised through the night and I might start caring again... also my mother is coming back down. Let's see if we can manage two weeks without going for each others' throats... the wee ones certainly enjoy being fussed over though so that's good. My MIL is coming after that and that's us until the wee ones are 12 weeks. This is a good thing, right? (erk!)

crossed posts Claire.

Well done on school run and you have every rght to feel smug smug smug!

Glad to hear you are safe and sound but sad about those nearby - when its not in the news it leaves are thoughts so don't appreciate the devastation it causes. Good luck with the fundraising and I hope you coninue to not be too affected.

crossed posts with you too Beyoglu!!! I am trying the 'comfort' milk with DTS for (mild) reflux. seems to be making a bit of differnce (I think). Good luck with Mother and then MIL - I know what you mean, nice to have help but then it is so hard to share your home and family.... sometimes just feel like struggling along on my own!

Also, anyone want to lay bets when DT2 is going to wake up? DT2 seems to have had a growth spurt where she went down from every 3 hours to every two hours, then she started stretching out for the occasional 4h stretch. Then DT1 started with the 2h feeding too and my nerves were totally shredded! Now they've done every 3h overnight except DT2 went 4 hours between 1.15 and 5.20... let's for a moment live in that wonderful place of hope where this is the start of the new pattern and she's going to sleep till 9.20 and then feed every 4 hours from now on...

aaand... 8.30. I guess we're stuck with 3 hour feeds for a while longer...

Yawn

Up since 4 here. I can't nap in the day really, only ever managed it about 5 times in my life even if I had got rid of my three, so I'm practically entering a state of altered reality now I think. I hallucinate figures crossing doorways, babies crying- freak myself out! DT2 is still often doing the really short sleep cycle- 40 min, sometimes 90 min. occasionally 2 hours. He was zonked by the first set of immunisations last night but noisy and restless with it but DT1 was distraught. I've been up since 4 now, bar a quick doze with the two of them just before DD woke up.

But, news of the day, DT2 has been awake and happy today!!!! For the first time, he sat in his bouncer for 20 min and didn't cry and cooed and smiled. Oh, it was so lovely I can't tell you. It makes me realize how much all the colic/ crying gets to me. I almost cried with happiness that he was happy. . DT1 has been much better today too, but he's been doing some awake and calm time anyway.

bigboobs, I don't think It's too late to contact the other twin mum. At playgroup this morning a mum gave me another twin mum's number who's spotted I have twins in case I need any help/ advice/ support. How sweet! I've met her once, not with twins- and hers are 4, but it seems twin mums are a supportive bunch. Do it! You know she was nice.

Babies crying...

Oh, poor you Dreaming! I feel for you. Can your DH maybe do the eveingshift so you can rest up a little?

Bigboobs we're not in the UK. actually, I'm not even british. I just like mumsnet more than all the stupid dutch ones. Don't kick me out :) We're in the States, so I'm really happy my Dh's job pays for our insurance. I'm also 8 hours behind so my day is just starting. Now I have to go and play at being cats with DS.

Good morning Where, I'm in Canada so we're probably on more similar time zones!

I now have a non-grumpy husband. Yey. I told him, in the middle of the night in no uncertain terms that if he didn't stop swearing at the boys, me and DD then I would thump him and treat him like the toddler he obviously is. He's actually been amazing as he gets up for every feed to help me change them and he's also been doing the DD wake ups as I'm normally attached to two babies. But yeah, I told him his grumpiness was bad for my mental health and he's been a bit better. Might help that they're all starting to sleep better - bigboobs my DD has always been a brilliant sleeper but since the twins came along she's got a bit erratic. Partly them arriving and partly just their age I think - 2 year olds are MENTAL and go through all sorts of weird patterns of behaviour.

claire, I was just thinking of you yesterday and hoping things were OK. We haven't really had much in Canada's news about the shakes so I was wondering how things were turning out. So sad. Well done you on doing the school run. I quite enjoy taking DD to nursery with the boys as I get loads of kudos and it certainly bucks me up when I'm feeling a bit pathetic!

Now, when we move back we need to buy a vehicle of some sort to move us all around - any recommendations? I've got 3 kids and would ideally like something that also has space for carrying stuff - we like camping etc. And I don't care if they're sitting together or separate or whatever. Answers on a postcard please.

Ooh, I love my Seat Alhambra. Full size mpv, if you have all three across the middle row and take out the back two seats there's masses of boot space. Not if back seats in though.

DT2 in full colic mode again...

Claire, amazing work on the school run, ditto rednellie with the nursery run. I have had lots of admiration for getting out alone with my three on the handful of occasions I've done it :) . And that has been far easier as no set time like school/ nursery. I do kind of wish DD went to nursery sometimes, but I don't think we'll start it until she's over 2 and things have settled down at home as she's gone more clingy again atm.

You are welcome with us wheresmy, Claire is Italian, red overseas, but we've all got our twins in common!

What car seats have you got dream? I can't imagine how three could fit in one row...but then I'm not very imaginative.

I have only met one twin mum where I live with young babies and she wasn't all that bothered on talking to me crazy lady that I am kept saying how her babies were really easy . So you lot are my twin mums in arms!! I was first one in the hospital with twins this year pretty rare thing here then!

Regarding hv and reflux and twins I couldnt fault mine she was fab but I did have to nudge her sometimes into fabness.

dreaming am gutted for you that you havent had any sleep yet I feel your pain. How old are your twins now? sleep can only be around the corner right?

red my dh got a kick up the ass too he was crap at first with the sleepless nights but honestly since the day I told him spoke to him which was at least 3 months ago he has been great and not let me down once I cannot fault him and special fathers day 'cwtch' for him on the way (careful). How has everyone elses dh/dp's been? supportive or not? how did you think they would be?

'beyo' Im sorry to say but we havent had 4 hourly feeds for yonks my chubsters but 3 hourly is ok in the day right? its the nightimes they need to work out out and they will. One night youll wake for a feed and realise theyve gone longer or missed a feed and you and dp/dh will do the victory dance at 4am. Then at 5am. Then it will be light. Then your alarm will wake you first. It wont happen every night yet though!

My other car things- big cars are great in carparks etc if they have sliding doors. The cheapest mpv's with sliding doors are KIA sedona's or Citroën c8's. Neither has great reliability. The most reliable are the VW Sharan, Seat Alhambra or Ford Galaxy. The galaxy has more electrical stuff to go wrong but is a lovely drive. The brand new models of all those three also have sliding doors, but we have a second hand one and are managing to squeeze the car seats in and out anyway so far.

Of other non full size mpv's, BB3 likes her Honda FRV is it? A 6 seater, and i think the Citroën grand Picasso etc are popular choices but after seeing we wouldn't get our barely used so far triple buggy in the boot and some painful experiences in the past dh ruled out all Citroëns etc plus we decided we'd need a big car for years so went straight to MPV. That is months of deliberation in 2 boring paragraphs.

Two colicky babies here now, I have lost the will to carry on and had a cry, dh super grumpy, DD screaming and refusing to go to bed, in a frightening return to the 6 months of Sleep Hell when I was pregnant. I've tried the sitting in there inching out etc etc. Beyond grim. It better pass quickly this time.

dream

Nothing useful to add, just feel very dorry for you.

Sorry, not dorry...

Oh, rednellie, I have DD in.the worlds largest car seat, an extended rear facer, the BeSafe iZi combi and the boys in isofix maxi cosi ones.

Both boys still crying but dh flying the flag alone now, I have hit the can't cope point.

10 weeks today. The best one has only ever slept for 4 hours, twice. The other is 1-2. :(

Oh dream, if you're still up I'm there with you holding your hand. You are so amazing and have had such a rough 6 months what with DD and now these two sillies. Just keep concentrating on the improvements. You got smiles and 20 mins of them in their chairs. that's wonderful. Let yourself have a flop, there is no shame in that whatsoever. I'd think you were weird if you didn't have a cry. I had a cry watching Great British Menu. No idea why. So there you go. Loads of hugs coming your way.

And thank you for all the car info - can't believe you made time to do that whilst dealing with what you are. Thanks i have no idea what half the terms mean, but will feedback all that info. I think we'd want a sliding door jobby as London's not known for having expansive parking spaces...we can't afford new, we've got a right old banger out here, but it does the job. Will have to investigate.

mine, you lot are defo my twin mums in arms! I've got one other friend who has 6 year old boy twins and she's been a font of wisdom and support, but seeing as she lives in Warrington and I'm in Vancouver it's still not on the spot support as such! Whereabouts in Wales are you? South or North?