What do think about interracial relationships

[jadey0885]

Hi
Being in an interracial relationship and having 2 children who are dual heritage we have faced a lot of scrutiny from a lot of people.
I'm white and my partner is black/Jamaican.
We have been together for the past 13 years and have always remained strong. We are still young with both of us in our early 30's.
There has been times that I have approached people for to the looks and mutters and so has my partner.
My eldest daughter has already had racial slurs made towards her.

I have never understood why people can be so horrible towards a relationship.
I have always been a person to think"whoever you fall in love with is who you fall in love with" not looking at the colour,gender etc.

What do you all think of interracial relationships? And have you ever experienced anything

Thanks

Hi! I have really enjoyed reading this thread, so interesting to read from lots of different other mixed couples.

I live in The North but in a big city which I would consider to be very diverse, although it does depend where you are in the city. The area that we currently live in is quite naice and much less diverse than some of the other inner-city (poorer!) areas. I am mixed myself - white British mother and a middle eastern, immigrant father. I am also a religious minority. My husband is white British and from a different religious background. My DF's side of the family (who all live abroad) and he himself really, really struggled with accepting our relationship initially and this was almost solely influenced by the difference in religious background rather than ethnic differences. After all, my DF married someone from a different ethnic background and nationality, but my DM converted to the religion, so that was accepted. Also in my middle eastern heritage, it's much more acceptable for a man to marry 'outside' of the culture/religion than it is for a woman (actually, it's mostly deemed forbidden for a woman to marry outside of the religion). Apart from that initial stumbling block, we haven't had any major problems. There have definitely been odd comments etc from people, including DH's (all-white British) family - who have been always lovely and accepting to me, but there has been odd things that I hesitate to call racist when I love them so much, but they are/were unfortunately!

I think the people who mentioned class are also spot on. I was born and raised in this country and my parents are both from working class backgrounds (actually my DF at points of his childhood lived in significant poverty overseas, think 2 adults and 3 children living in one room for awhile, both of his parents were illiterate, etc). However, my upbringing here has definitely been more 'middle class' and my parents definitely percieve themselves to have both climbed the class ladder iyswim. My DH grew up on a council estate in an area that is almost exclusively white British and very poor. His upbringing was vastly different from mine and that was largely not due to race or religion etc it was due to class.

Rejuvenate20 - I'm sorry to hear that you're having a difficult time with your partner's family. Your partner should really have your back and supporting the way you are bringing up your daughter. So I can imagine that it's disappointing to not have that support. I hope there's a way that your relationship can be saved.

My husband is mixed race, and the most annoying question I've been asked, more than once is
"But would you get with a black man, you know proper black, full black"

I’m in an interracial relationship- I’m while my OH is half Bajan, half Jamaican. As we live in London I’ve not found much negativity but the problem has been when we travel to my home town/grandparents town to visit.

We visited my nan and went to a local weatherspoons for breakfast - 20 minutes he was stood waiting to be served and the girl point blank ignored him. I went up and she refused to serve me - kept serving people who’d come up after me. Luckily a lady challenged her and said “actually this lady has been waiting first and her partner before that”. She wouldn’t make eye contact with me.

Had to explain to my grandparents they couldn’t call OH “coloured” 😔

I think strangest one has been lack of understanding about DNA. My DD is 12 weeks and when my mum met her she said “oh why is she white”...
Had to explain although she’s mixed/dual heritage she could just be fair (or red as my OH calls it - his gran is mixed and calls herself red as she’s very fair).

@jennymac31 Thank you for your words of support.

People have asked me many times where my children are originally from. I just say north London. I could write a book about this subject. It’s extremely difficult but we need to remain vigilant and recognise this racism. Reni Eddo-Lodge’s ‘Why I’m No Longer Talking To White People About Race’ is a very important book and I highly recommend reading this if you are raising black or mixed race children.

No-one asks white people where they're from or what their heritage is

I'm white with an unusual surname and I often get asked where I'm from. (I'm from here, I've always lived here!)

I'll have to do like in the clip posted above and say my husband's great great grandfather was from x

What do you all think of interracial relationships?

^ Nothing. It just doesn't cross my mind. 🤷🏻‍♀️

I don't think Oh your DH is black or Asian, it just doesn't register.

@Bloomburger
Unfortunately my love people experience these kind of things and it isn't nice.

I do understand that people do experience these type negative things. Was just answering the question asked in the title. It just wouldn't cross my mind as much as someone having a dame sex partner would.

@Bloomburger give over. Yes it would.

@Cissyandflora er no it wouldn't at all.