Both work and we claim UC but still can't afford to live.

[Mocha1]

We have 3 kids, 2 who aren't at school yet, my husband and I both work 30 hours a week for charities so not highly paid. We also have childcare for part of the week and then juggle the kids between us the rest of the time (We don't want to work more as we dont want the kids in fulltime childcare). We rent and down't own. We claim UC but we are still really struggling to make ends meet. We really try to live to a tight budget but I have no idea how to lower our expenses any more.

Am I missing something? Is this normal? does anyone have any tips for saving money/ making more income somehow? I feel a bit at a loss as we keep dipping into our savings for just day to day expenses and we're nearly at the end of those.

Our income at the moment (I'm on MAT leave) - £3980
Outgoings- £4250

Do these outgoings seem like a lot for a family of 5 living in the south west? I've been going over our budget and I have no idea how to save any more unless we literally never bought another birthday present or went to a soft play ever again.

Hubby and I earn similar; both working and come out with about £4k between us per month. We don't therefore qualify for UC but we do privately rent as can't afford to buy. It is very difficult. How much is your rent pm?

Will need a breakdown of your spending

@everychildmatters it’s so hard isn’t it? I just don’t know how we are meant to make enough to live whilst we have small kids. Sorry things are stretched for you too.

rent is £1400.

You have 3 children, that's a luxury really.
Could you work opposite shifts, days/nights or retraining and become a childminder, extra weekend work?

Sounds like you may need to move somewhere cheaper

I agree. I think your choice to have so many children is definitely a luxury and should’ve been taken into consideration if you are struggling a bit for cash

@Mocha1 Ours is just under that - what's your council tax? We pay £270 per month (over 12 months) and again, that's a lot! How many bedrooms have you got? We are 3-bed, three kids, but one off to uni so 5 yo can finally move out of our room at some point 😀 No way we can afford 4-bed and rent is crazy as is!

Hi OP, sorry to hear you are struggling - Can you provide a rough breakdown of how you spend £4250 a month maybe (how much for bills, food, etc...) it would help us come up with some ideas of how you can budget differently, or at least give you some perspective.
£1400 for rent sounds very decent for a family of 5, so I don't think that's the issue.
Without knowing where that money goes it's difficult to advise.

Also, could you do the same job but for a private company for instance (which would likely pay more than a charity).

Three kids is a big luxury, and has been for a long time. You really need two full time working adults or one full time worker on a very good wage. You’ve got two part time working adults on sort of low pay. The numbers just aren’t going to work.

Is there anything you can cut down on? It’s either cut down or move somewhere cheaper. Or work more hours. You’re home on mar leave so childcare is covered for now. Which means your husband should be taking on as many extra hours as he can get, or a second job if extra hours aren’t available. After mat leave, one of you may just need to increase hours or get a second evening job when the other parent is home.

So where is the other £2800 going?

@Uggbootsforever Council Tax, utilities, food (for large family), clothes, childcare, fuel, insurances etc?

Thor joint take home pay, if one person would mean a wage of 70ish k a year. That isn’t low (though it is in MN world!), I’m surprised you are entitled to UC

(We don't want to work more as we dont want the kids in fulltime childcare)

@DurinsBane Don't know? Hubby and I both work and come out with about £4k pm jointly but don't get UC. My job is term-time only so that's a bit of a nightmare and it's definitely not easy when our rent and CT is about £1500 pm alone.

Why don’t you want the kids in FT childcare?

Honestly though, if you had one working person on 70k a year, it still wouldn’t be easy to support a family of 5 but at least you’d have no childcare bill with one parent permanently at home.
If you’ve got to pay childcare and wraparound school care for 3 kids then you’re going to find it hard. They need to increase their hours around one another so someone can be at home, or work opposing shifts so someone gets an evening job.
Depends a lot on where you live and what fixed costs you have too.

I think one of you has to go full time. I work 30 hours too and was looking at the difference recently.

Or can one of you go for a new job/promotion?

Will your finances get better or worse when you are back at work?

The “childcare years” are always going to be tough ones.

You need to ask ?

Why on earth have you had that many children? Most people need 2 adults working full time for one child, 3 on part time low pay is completely unrealistic and irresponsible.
You need to earn more. That’s your answer.

On the plus side if you both work part time and for charity you have loads of potential to increase your earnings. You may not want to, but the flip side of having 3 children has limited your options. You need more money so work full time, get better paid jobs in a different sector and balance your books. Not drowning in debt will be better for your family than full time childcare.

Sadly the answer is to work more. I would prefer my kids weren’t in full time but to cover bills and expenses need to work full time so it is what it is. Yes we are all tired, yes they would rather not go to wraparound, yes it shit getting in late with overtired kids trying to cook, do reading and homework, get the washing on, yes it does make for busy weekends. But you need to consider working more hours - be it in current roles or someone picking up some evening work - likely to be more available as we head towards Christmas.

And no, life shouldn’t cost this much - but it does. I don’t get UC and we are still struggling and need to work full time.

You work more hours.

Apart from rent, utilities, food and essential clothing required everything else needs to be cut.

Wow, this got quite unpleasant quite quick. Thank you to those of you who have been genuinely supportive. I was going to post more of a breakdown of our outgoings but now I feel very vulnerable after some of the comments.

From the research we’ve done, we’ve come to believe that it’s not beneficial to their development or long term wellbeing to be in full time childcare at a young age. I understand not everyone would agree with that. And I have honestly never heard of a third child being called a luxury.

nobody has really been unkind. People are just starting to notice your outgoings and have commented on them as you asked for advice. Children are v expensive as you probs have realised already, most people would not have a third especially if both parents only have PT jobs.

the fact you don’t want to put them in childcare means you will not be able to take on extra work for more money, so I’m not sure what you want us all to say.