Both work and we claim UC but still can't afford to live.

[Mocha1]

We have 3 kids, 2 who aren't at school yet, my husband and I both work 30 hours a week for charities so not highly paid. We also have childcare for part of the week and then juggle the kids between us the rest of the time (We don't want to work more as we dont want the kids in fulltime childcare). We rent and down't own. We claim UC but we are still really struggling to make ends meet. We really try to live to a tight budget but I have no idea how to lower our expenses any more.

Am I missing something? Is this normal? does anyone have any tips for saving money/ making more income somehow? I feel a bit at a loss as we keep dipping into our savings for just day to day expenses and we're nearly at the end of those.

Our income at the moment (I'm on MAT leave) - £3980
Outgoings- £4250

Do these outgoings seem like a lot for a family of 5 living in the south west? I've been going over our budget and I have no idea how to save any more unless we literally never bought another birthday present or went to a soft play ever again.

So do I , but there’s five of them and they will need a bigger house, more rent and more food for starters.
plus higher council tax, water rates etc so really it sounds about right to me (I worked in lettings so have had ample access to peoples income / outgoings , affordability calculations etc)

What are your outgoings? You should have around £1.5k minimum for food and all extras per month after bills unless your rent is extremely high?
Food budget 500, that should leave you with around 1k spare money a month. If most of that is going on childcare you may be better off having one of you going full time ideally in a better paid role and the other looking for evening shift work.

It’s not about her “milking the state”, both of them work, it’s not like they are sat on their arses claiming every benefit going, but It’s not wrong for people to point out that their situation would be resolved by one of them taking a full time job, or a better paid job. Cost of living has been ridiculous for several years now it’s not a recent thing, OP is on maternity leave, so the 3rd child was born with them well aware of the current climate, they chose to have the baby, and like many many families they will have to do things they don’t necessarily want to do to fund being a family if 5.

That 10 years ago was a completely normal thing. No one would have made rhe annoying face you did
But thanks to the stupid way this country has been run (predominantly by a tory government) this is where we are at. It wasn't the Norm for generations by the way that both parents had to work to survive. That is very very recent.

OP it's really hard at the moment. Very depressing. Lots of families trying to eat in economical ways for example but even that's difficult with the price of things. Your income is more than some. Things are no longer a given .

No. But that post might be useful for someone reading this who is thinking of starting a family. It is so easy to forget that children can be expensive and that they need to be budgeted for.

You can get cheap biscuits and cereals and crisps surely? I say this because I need to cut back but want to have treats. I guess it may be cheaper to make them yourself?

I think people have been unkind and very judgmental. Three children with loving, caring parents - who knows how big an asset they will be to broader society in time. I wish you well and hope your finances improve. You sound sensible and will cope.

Quite simply you can afford to work part time. You will both need to go full time.

what is your income when you are not on maternity leave leave?

I wouldn't say working 30 hours each neither of you is working full time. One of you should go full time and work 40+ hours every week like millions of others.

I don’t want to be unpleasant but this has really annoyed me. You are both choosing to work less than full time as you don’t want your children in full time childcare. But then you are claiming UC and complaining about not having enough money. One or both of you could work FT. I don’t think the state should be supporting your choice to have three children and to claim benefits because neither of you want to work FT. I don’t want to work FT either, neither does DH but we have no choice as we need to provide for our two children and we don’t believe in relying on the state unless in circumstances such as disability illness job loss etc. I know it’s not a race to the bottom but I find it galling you are complaining about not having enough money and relying on the state when the easy solution is to up one/both your hours.

So you chose to have 3 kids you can't afford and neither of you work fulltime?
🤨

You have a problem entirely of your own making but you don't want to fix it!
🤨🤔🙄

This. In spades.

I wish I didn’t have to work full time, but I do to maintain my lifestyle. I wouldn’t expect the government to subsidise me if I didn’t. Nor would I complain about not having enough money when that was a choice I’d made.

Your dh should have taken on another job of some sort when you started mat leave. 30 hours per week is not much. The opportunity might still be there for him doing weekend work etc? He could easily do another 10 hrs work per week to bring in more income. When you go back to work it may not be possible but right now you have no childcare issues.

Life is not unaffordable, We all afford it every month. But we do so by working for a living, making sensible decisions and being financially realistic.

I grew up in poverty and I didn't thank my parents for a miserable childhood. I left as soon as possible. Now I have one child in order to give my child a decent upbringing. I have worked full time, as a single mum since he was two, and I don't get UC.

The OP has chosen to have 3 dcs unless the last two were twins, she has chosen to work part time, she has chosen a poorly paying job, her dh was chosen to work part time too, he has also chosen a poorly paid job.

The answer to her dilemma is obvious, she or her dh need to work more and/or switch to a better paid role.

We were earning that between us in the 2000s, with a monthly mortgage cost of half your rent and decided we couldn't afford to have more than two children, or for me as the higher earner to have three lots of maternity leave. Or for me to give up work, as I couldn't do my job with three children to think about, two was hard enough. We were never under the threshold for tax credit as it was then and would never have considered claiming.

Your other half needs to get a better paid job and you both do in the longer term.

Well yes you can, if you want to eat "treats" with the nutritional value of sea water!

Cereals particularly are not a good choice. I am told that porridge is a good choice, although personally I dont like it. I prefer wholewheat thick sliced toast with marmite (ok....peanut butter then!) Costs a fraction of the price and is far better from a dietary pov. Biscuits. Yes you can get cheap ones but they are not nice to eat. Again with crisps.

You can make your own biscuits but ime no they are not cheaper. Same with bread.

The answer is to work more. Three children and only working 30 hours a week each is not going to cut it sadly. Not on UK wages.

Is the £1400 rent covered by HB?

If you have 3 children how much exactly does the cost of child care cost you each month
Would it be better if one of you gave up your job instead of paying out for nursery fees and the other worked full time during the week. Then in the evenings roles reversed and a few nights per week the SAHP goes out to work

I've just looked at mine.
Mortgage £1230
Council Tax £250
Water £70
Duel fuel £170
Insurance £35
TV/Broadband £80
Food (we shop fortnightly) works out around £500
Car loan £335

That's £2670 for 4 adults and 2 dogs. I don't think we're particularly frugal because we're all working so there is a fair amount of disposable cash (my eldest and his wife live with me whilst they save for a deposit; my youngest is at university but living at home rather than in halls). I think you might need to sit down and do a full income/expenditure calculation.

You have three children and no adult works full time.

I actually can’t fathom how you expected to get by this way. Even with the taxes of those who do support their children, and yours.

Unbelievable.

Do you have a break down of your outgoings op so we can help see where savings could be made. Are you aware where it all goes? I understand your viewpoint, but I think it is both working part time which is the luxury nowadays, rather than the children. That's a very fair choice to make, but may mean you need to make some cut backs to balance the books.

@Mocha1 I assume as you both work 30 hours this is over 4 days. If your DH went to full time (37.5) over 4 days would that make a difference? Alternatively could one of you work evenings or one day at the weekend in a second job.

For some posters it may be helpful to remember that some parents have their first child and when planning a second end up with twins = 3 children. It’s not always a choice to just have two.