Grandchild not included in will

[RogueApostrophe]

Hi everyone, I'll try and keep it brief. The inlaws' will was written in 2006, my daughter was born in 2008. When the father-in-law passed away in 2007, she did not receive any inheritance which seems fair enough.
However her grandmother has recently passed away when she was aged 9 and she is still not included on the will, so the Executors (the three siblings, one of which is my husband) have still not thought to allocate any money to her along with the 6 other grandchildren.

What are my options here? I know a Deed of Variation is possible if all beneficiaries agree to her being included. Should I go straight to the probate solicitor for the mother in law, or do I instruct my own which will obviously be costly but perhaps better to fight the corner of my daughter. For what it's worth, my husband didn't think she should get anything because she wasn't in the will - he's very black and white about things which makes it difficult to speak to him about it. He also doesn't have a great relationship with his brother and won't want to rock the boat by mentioning this situation.

However World War 3 has kicked off at home so he's now open to reconsidering this. It's his brother that is the Mastermind of the three siblings so I feel it's worth bypassing my husband and going directly to his brother but I feel it would be better done via a solicitor.

Thanks!

When my grandmother died my cousins received nice amounts of money and I got nothing for similar reasons. I hadn't been born when the wills were drawn up and they were badly written to not make provision for subsequent grandchildren.

I remember my mother being disappointed on my behalf at the time (and furious with my cousins for frittering their money away on clothes and holidays). However, I'm not bothered at all. I have happy memories of grandparents who adored me when they were alive.

When another relative died some members of my family contested the will because they felt they deserved a share. It caused horrible bad feeling and resentment in the family.

It's really not worth falling out with anyone over.

As the amount is fairly small, and your husband is (presumably?) receiving a much larger sum, I would just suggest he allocate an equal amount to her from his share. Since it sounds as if 4 out of 6 grandchildren are his, this seems reasonable enough.

Your DD should have been included in the will of course, it was badly written if not deliberate. But I don't thing the amount you mention justifies legal action or family arguments. It would be different if millions were at stake.

Hummmm, it's tricky as I tend to think the will is the will, but in this case it's pretty clear that this was probably an unintentional oversight. Having said that, going in all guns blazing and using solicitors seems like a massive overreaction, when in your own words 'they haven't thought' - ie it's not that it's been discussed and they are all against it.

I would suggest to your husband that he lets the other executors know that he's planning to allocate £x (ie the amount the other grandchildren are getting) to your dd as she's been left out of the will as she wasn't born when it was written - unless they have any other suggestions. Hopefully, they would all then say they are happy to chip in and do something similar. I don't think you can demand it, and I wouldn't want to fall out with family over something like this, but I think any sensible person (are they?!) would see that this was fair.

I don’t think it’s grabby at all. When 1 out of 7 children is excluded and it’s the one born after the will was signed, it’s obvious that child should have been added but wasn’t. I greatly doubt that the grandparent left her out on purpose and didn’t want her to inherit anything. It’s obviously a mistake and the child should receive the same as the others.

Having said that, my family is greedy and absolutely would exclude a small child to get slightly more for themselves. I hope yours is more decent.

"I would have thought it would be simple and obvious for the executors to agree a variation to split the GC bequest 7 ways instead of 6."

Isn't it the beneficiaries, not the executors, who have the power to agree a variation - though I am not an expert! (and I don't know what the implications would be if the executors were also trustees for any of the beneficiaries, for example if any other dgc is under 18)

I think Teentimes2's point D is the most sensible. Its worth mentioning to the brother if DH refuses to intervene but its not worth falling out over.

Personally I think as it's not your parents' will, you should keep quiet to keep the peace. Your husband should be the one to fight her corner.

I was left out of a will as a child while my cousins and aunts got a share. It never bothered me as it wasn't my money to begin with so I didn't lose anything.

I also think that just because it's not fair, it doesn't mean she's entitled to it. As mean as this sounds, just because the others got some, doesn't mean she should.

How old are the other grandchildren? Is it possible that the Grandparents were concerned about giving money at her age? Could they have been unaware that it would be held in trust?

My point Suburban was that sad though it is when someone dies, practicalities still have to be dealt with.

I’m surprised that none of the other adults, SILs or BILs have raised this already. My family would be falling over themselves to make it fair.

@Tawdry - I'm not really sure what he's receiving, I haven't been included in anything to do with the will. I don't think it will be a large amount though but I'll ask him to see if there's a way she gets the same amount as the other 6. Yes 4 of the grandchildren are his.

Also to pp who are saying it’s only a small amount - £5k is not a small amount to lots of people. For a child it can be a life changing amount if it buys their first car or contributes to their house deposit when they’re older.

@MrsMolehill - My husband doesn't like to fight and even refused to write a joint will when I wrote one last year. There's a small backstory to this but not relevant to this post other than he doesn't like thinking about his future as he finds it all overwhelming as he doesn't have a pension etc.

One other grandchild is Under 18 and her money remains in trust till she is 25. The other 5 are over 18.

@Nona - yes my main feeling is disappointment that none of them have sought to rectify this.

OP I cometely understand why it is hurtful that 1 out of 7 grandchildren has been left out of the grandparents will. Especially as your Dh's other children were included. And it would be very upsetting for your DC.
I think many comments have been knee jerk and critical without people actually reading properly.
If possible I would make up the financial difference to your dc and not let them know it wasn't in the will.

I am a co-executor to a relative’s will at the moment. If this had happened we would automatically have requested a Deed if Variarion, If it was clear that your DD wasn’t left out deliberately. (Eg if she had been an adult and she and grandma were no longer speaking). The awful virtue-signalling when it comes to wills on MN always makes me laugh. Deeds of variation are quite normal in these sorts of circumstances, where the will has been poorly drafted.

I’m surprised that no-one else in the family has already brought this up. Are the executors not using a solicitor at all? The solicitor should also have suggested a Deed of Variation to the executors.

As it stands, it doesn’t sound like relationships between your DH and his brother are good (grandma should have checked this when writing her will if she wanted them to be co-executors!), so it may strain things further if he raised this now. BIL or solicitor or other grandchildren if it’s enough SHOULD have offered this alresdy themselves. They haven’t, and if your DH understandably refuses to ask then there is nothing you can do.

Let this be a lesson to people not to include specific grandchildren in a will unless there are particular reasons eg their own parents have already died and therefore they will be missing out on any inheritance getting “passed on” to them.

It's really not worth kicking up a fuss over 5k. You really should just let it lie. Fundamentally it will pro ably end up costing more to get a solicitor involved than she would get if they gave her a 'share'.

The two brothers get on passably but my husband definitely feels like his brother is the one in control. There has been lots of spats in the past over silly things which has led to them not talking to each other for a while. Nothing to do with me, though!

I think you’ve had a bit of a hard time OP. It must feel like quite an insult for her to be excluded.

I was pregnant with my youngest child when one of their grandparents passed. Their will had a smallish bequeath for each of the grandchildren. The rest went to their spouse who once the child was born gave us a cheque for the same amount.

I think in this case given 4 out of 6 of additional children are his your DH should just make her up out of his share of there is one.

Why not suggest to your husband that the executors agree to split his children's inheritance equally and leave the other grandchildren as it is?
That way it wouldn't affect children by the other siblings and they might even suggest equal splits, who knows?

Glad to hear thst deed of variation is not unusual in this situation. I feel very sorry that your in laws are so lacking in sensitivity.

But the suggestion that your OH gives the same amount to this child out of his own inheritance is also good.
He should really ensure his children end up with the same amount of money as legacies, including any possible future children, who are not to blame for being born later.

I hate inheritances and think everyone would be happier if they didn't happen.

But that aside, my grandma left money to her grandchildren. We were all named in her will except my youngest cousin who'd not been born when my grandmother wrote the will.

When she died, we all agreed to divide the money she had left us nine ways - including my littlest cousin - instead of eight ways as in the will. I can't actually understand why anyone wouldn't do this unless they were selfish and greedy.

Why not suggest to your husband that the executors agree to split his children's inheritance equally and leave the other grandchildren as it is?
I'd do this, OP

Instead of asking to have her included can the money his other 3 children get be split equally between them all?

My husband has already told his eldest two what sum of money they are receiving. He now has to go to them and tell them it will be less if our daughter is to be included.

As a side matter, he has not decided what sum of money to give to the one grandchild that is under 18 as her mother owes him a large sum of money. Not sure if that's relevant or not, although it doesn't affect my daughter's situation.

I do get you here OP and I find it odd so many seems to think you are being grabby here.

I think the only issue I can see is BIL feeling as if his brother gets a " larger share " as the grandchildren are mostly his.

MIL passed away earlier this year and one of the first things SIL said was when we deal with the money we will top up " GC 7 and 8's" saving accounts so they have had the same amount from Grandma GC 1-6 had (grandma used to add money to their savings total about 4K GC 7 & 8 are both mine and have about 3 from her each) Probate is going through right now and SIL has mentioned it again says it is the only fair way to do it.

In our case as the GC are not actually named I would have felt it was just as it was but in the case where all other grandchildren are named I really would expect them to make an exception for the last Grandchild.