Can't afford to feed my husband

[Prusik]

Gah, the title sounds pathetic! Please don't rip me to pieces for the fact that he should be feeding himself but it's the simplest summary I can give.

DH is 6ft7 and skinny. He eats a lot to maintain his weight. He's both milk and egg free (milk is allergy, egg is intolerance as his gut tends to get inflamed). He also tries to avoid sugar as he was finding he was getting major energy slumps during the day and reaching for sweets.

Ok, so here goes. I did the food shop last night and it was £100. Haven't bought any luxury items apart from I bought four cartons of supermarket brand apple juice and haven't yet bought meat for the week.

Try to fill him up on protein, ie nuts, chicken wraps, etc as empty carbs just don't seem to cut it. I rely on cheap meat where I can, we eat a lot of mince. And I bulk things out with cheap veg and potatoes. We cook chilli with beans, pulses, etc and I make my own humous as that's a good fix and so much cheaper than the supermarkets.

I'm just at my wit's end. For various reasons we're now at the arse end of poor. We're going down to one vehicle and are really struggling. We don't buy coffees out, don't go anywhere which costs parking... everything we do is free. But I'm still struggling to afford to feed DH. I do buy fruit in for the baby and am starting to cut corners with what I eat just so DH and Ds can be fed. I'm not going without but will just have jam on toast for lunch rather than anything better as I don't want to use food up. This is far from ideal as I'm 28 weeks pregnant change in circumstances happened after I conceived

We get tax credits and child benefit.

Any tips for feeding a very hungry person on the cheap?? He's not greedy, he genuinely needs the food. ds is beginning to look like he will be the same

I don’t have time to RTFT, so sorry if I am repeating something.

As others have said, OP, you need to feed yourself properly rather than cut back on things so that he can eat.

I would add lentils or beans to most of the food. So a chilli with a small amount of minced beef and 2 or 3 times that amount of beans, fe. I know some people add oats to things like bolognaise, although I haven’t tried it myself.

If you do buy oats make sure it’s not the instant/quick cooking type. That is chopped so small that it passes through so quickly once eaten that you get hungry again very soon.

Can you do things like veg curry? loads of veg like carrots and cauliflower, add lentils to that too. I also add grated carrots to simple tomato sauce for pasta.

I hope things improve for you very soon.

You are allowed to buy chicken! I think people are annoyed FOR you not getting to eat enough and want to help, we arent annoyed AT you :)

Do you have Facebook? Join the group called feed yourself for £1 a day. Loads of ideas in there
Think stuff like stews with loads of potatoes and veg to bulk, chunky cut carrots and parsnips etc etc

I'm reading this thinking Rice Potatoes Pasta, + loads of veg (buy frozen for cheapness). Chicken isn't expensive. One lot meals at good I can make a heavy soup..chicken potato lentil & dumplings. I'd be amazed if that doesn't fill him up. From what you've lisyed, the food isn't filling. Carbs will do it. Complex carbs if you prefer. But basing foods mostly on protein can't cut it, he will be forever hungry

Meat is expensive. Dried beans and lentils will give him protein and cost a lot less. Do you have a freezer? Frozen veg is cheaper than fresh, and just as good. Since going vegan our food bills have been slashed.

Hes eating like someone who is slimming, I'm not surprized hes hungry.
Get him tins of beans, potatoes and big bags of oven chips and he'll soon fill up.
It sounds like hes been a bit silly eating like hes doing when the household is skint.
Also put yourself first your pregnant dont be suffering so he can have all these special things. TBH he sounds a right pain.

Oh and as others have said, oat milk (particularly Oatly Barista) is higher in calories and fat than other plant based milks, and also delicious.

Oatly Barista is great but it's really expensive... £1.80 a carton and you could easily get through 4 or 5 of those a week (we get through about 8 or 9 cartons of milk)

Provitamil is less fatty but you can get it for £1.

I would ask around and see if anyone you knew had a slow cooker and a bread machine sitting in the back of a cupboard, or maybe ask on free cycle like thing. They will bring down the cost of food without impacting the quality, they also don't take a lot of your time.

Your DH is just eating a diet for another income bracket, if he doesn't shop and isn't prepping food he is probably not even aware of this. You need to talk to him. As others have said nuts, anything other than basic peanuts are an expensive habit and chicken wraps in bulk aren't sustainable either.

Pluses, quorn and basic veg are what we use when trying to eat cheaply and healthily. Basic carbs like bread and pasta are even cheaper and filling.

Sit down together with a couple of the websites suggested and meal plan a months worth of economy meals. This should cut down on stress, ensure you both know what shopping needs doing and give your other half a wake up call.

Hi op, sorry this has turned into a bit of an ordeal for you.
My two penneth is this..... I've been a HCP for over 30 years. And he does sound like he has an underlying problem that needs sorting. And I know you scoffed at the idea of parasites, but it is really common, especially in meat eaters, I'm sorry to say.
Impo he needs to go to the gp, and get screened for coeliac, parasites c and inflammatory bowl diseases.
Best of luck with it and your pregnancy.

Make some soda bread rolls with whole meal spelt flour. Walnuts could also be added to the mix. They are very filling. I would defy anyone not to be able to get full eating one of these filled with ham or cheese with some homemade soup. I sometimes cannot eat a whole one if they are made slightly larger that usual.

They can be frozen for use throughout the week.

Regarding the above I do not get full on ordinary sliced whole meal.

Wraps cost penny’s to make and are so way you could make 12 for very little.
Jacket potatoes with beans and cheese are filling or tuna, my kids eat these and they have hollow legs.

Beans and pulses are your friends and serve everything with homemade chunks of bread, warming, filling and nutritious.

If you get one of those chunky flasks he could take stew or a stodgy soup for lunch with some brown bread , that would definitely be cheaper and more filling than wraps .

I hope you are ok OP. I can never face cooking anything when pregnant (especially when I have a toddler to run after) especially big stews or soups so I really feel for you. I hope circs improve soon for you.

Oatly Barista is £1.77 in Morrisons but is currently on offer for £1.25.

I’m with Ohyesiam, he needs to get tested as some of these suggestions really could make his gut issues far worse!!! Mines included especially if there is something underlying. Coeliac disease can often remain undetected well into adult years (mines was) feeding him sheds of homemade bread would only make that worse, ibd or ibs upping his beans/lentils will make him sicker. Poor you having to juggle all this whilst pregnant but I think it’s definitely in both your interests to get it in black and white what is going on to save you the grief and the extra expense of it’s not needed.

I’ve not read through the thread so forgive me if I’m repeating or making points that aren’t appropriate to the situation,

If he can’t stomach eating something in the morning could he manage a smoothie? Oats/value yoghurt and a banana is filling, I give it to my kids when they’re mithering about eating in the morning.

I'll just add that it's really common to become iron deficient in pregnancy and with your poor diet and feeling tired a lot of the time, it would be worth getting that checked. I was slightly anaemic with my last pregnancy and I've never known tiredness like it!

Because you're pregnant, you should get free iron supplements on the NHS.

cookingonabootstrap.com/

Jack Munro is fantastic for eating well on a budget.

Op we are not on the same budget but I have a dh with ibs who keeps losing weight and it's very difficult to find things he can eat enough of without triggering ibs attacks. fish is our staple - frozen coley and Pollack is probably the cheapest. Coconut milk and lactofree cream. We eat a lot of polenta as well as rice. If he can tolerate the fats (my dh can't) then cornbread with oil is good. Chestnuts could be foraged?

How easy is it for you to get to the supermarket? ASDA (and others) have clear out times when all their on or near sell by date bakery products are sold off for very little (pence sometimes in ASDA) I often stock up and shove it all in the freezer. You can get big packs of rolls for 20p where I live, and stuff like loaves, bagels, crumpets etc very cheap - which will help fill him up.

You could also try adding a pastry or savoury crumble or cobbler topping to things like stews to add calories, or add dumplings. All cheap and easy to make and filling.

It may not be a calorie issue though - I suspect my dh just isn't digesting everything

My last blood test showed that my iron levels are really high, the midwife commented on how good my 'stores' are.

I really agree with those who've said about going to the doctors. He has a pain in the left (?) hand side of his gut which is aggravated when he has egg but I'm sure there's something going on.

Issues with dairy and gluten do run in his family. His cousin is coeliac and his other cousin is lactose intolerant. I worry that the pain he gets isn't normal but he's convinced that going egg and sugar free will allow his gut to heal.

Problem is, I'm not his.mother. nor am.i prepared to be so he has to go to the doctor of his own accord.

I have a slow cooker and dh's cousin has a bread maker that they've previously offered us.

We're both managing the best we can in a tricky situation but it's the reality of.living off minimum wage, statutory maternity pay and having two.kids

Sorry, slightly lost. You mention 100 quid spend. How much is your weekly budget. Cos with only 2 of you and a baby to feed 400 a month shouldnt see anyone hungry. Dont forget you need carbs as well as protein to function. I would do something like lentil soup and ham sandwich for lunch.