Debt mutual support thread number 4 .... every journey starts with the hardest first step

[TalkinPeace]

This thread follows on from Nerf's incredibly useful
FIRST www.mumsnet.com/Talk/legal_money_matters/1969188-Can-we-have-a-support-thread-for-people-who-are-massively-in-debt
and then SECOND
www.mumsnet.com/Talk/legal_money_matters/2011878-Debt-support-thread-2?
and my THIRD
www.mumsnet.com/Talk/legal_money_matters/a2062902-Debt-Number-3-For-those-who-feel-they-are-drowning-and-want-a-way-out?msgid=48505428#48505428
threads about realising you are in and supporting each other out of debt.

I am not in debt, any more.
Here is a link to some spreadsheets that might help
www.mumsnet.com/Talk/legal_money_matters/1987219-SPREADSHEETS-for-Debt-Control-Budgeting-Mortgages-etc

and lots of people use this
YouNeedABudget

The important thing to remember is

• yesterday is as past as the Crimean War

( we will not judge how you got into debt, but we will support you on the way out )

• this is an anonymous forum

( we will not tell your employer, family or friends of the reality of your numbers )

• this thread is about supporting people through the huge mindset changes needed to come out of debt

( feel free to offload all of the feelings that drive you to want to spend, that make it hard to save and that generally make life crap at times )

Join in, bare your soul and come out the other end.
Its worth it.
You are worth it.
The long term results for you, your marriage and your children are worth it.

Congratulations Didyou!

Congratulations Didyou - now that is something definately worth budgeting for!

Right.
My tablet charger died yesterday, so I went on ebay to buy another.
While I was there I found loads of cheap tablets and laptops of all kinds.
In fact, because I have been looking for a laptop, I found and bought another gotab, this time 9" with a case and keyboard all for £50 inc postage. It says it was an unwanted present.
If you're looking for something computery, do it now for eBay before the market is flooded and they're harder to come by. The one I got today was 2 hours left til ending.

Regarding typing - my tablet accepts a keyboard by usb.
If you get a wireless keyboard and mouse set you only need one usb port for both.
Didyouevah! Congratulations on your bfp! Don't even think about buying baby clothes - ask everyone you know because I guarantee you'll get loads of baby clothes on loan or pass on. Also, ask around about cloth nappies. When dd was born, we got an entire set of size 1 nappies inc wraps and liners for £25 from my dance teacher! There was 3 days' worth, which is about 20 nappies for newborn.
I also refused to do genderstereotyping, which meant we were give twice as many clothes because people gave us boy and girl clothes! The baby doesn't care what colour it is when they puke or poo on it.

Nickel : DH connects to video networks
if you have kids between 5 and 15 and PM me I'll explain :-)

Typed out a message then lost it.

Lovely message nickel. Thankyou.

Agree that people always become very generous with babies. Well fingers crossed because I have nothing left from my first two.

2 days till payday....2 days till payday...

Can't come quick enough. Bank account looking awful. Eeeek. What with the oven, shower and needing new car battery yesterday really need to press the "reset" button and start again for next month!

Whoosh : I'll set up a new thread tomorrow :
it would be FAB if folks could post their start : now : target situations on there

Oh my goodness! What a fab note to end on - congratulations!

Good for you fairy Ive got to wait until 30th thats 6days - a bloody week! It's all relative though isnt it.

We cant afford to get our toilet or oven fixed until Oct payday!

Fell off the thread as I've been so quiet.

It's the guilt.

Pay tomorrow and a fresh month awaits. Onwards.

Good luck with interview Bad. Keeping everything crossed .

Didyou babies! So excited!!!! What a lovely surprise .

Without you lot and all you have taught me I wouldnt have been able to do this....

Just checked online banking and there is a lump sum payment from Housing Office, Im 90% sure its wrong and that we are not entitled to it so guess what I've done.. yup transfered it to a holding account I have until I have written proof that we are entitled to it. A couple of years ago it would have just got spent and then we'd have figured out how to pay it back when the time comes.

Feeling proud of myself that I now have self control but also shitty that we still have to rely on 'help'

Actually looking I was quite down that we've only been able to put a small amount off the debt..but we've paid parents back £200, and replaced kids pocket money we'd had to borrow totalling £100. So in actual fact we've done really well this month. Roll on next month now

Said to my DH last night 'I can't believe we've nearly done it' - a whole month on so little money.

Things have been so tough this month with moving house but I am quite proud of myself for how I have managed and I am SO grateful to everyone on this thread!

We have a long, long way to go but are trying to make do with what we have and prioritise spending.

I have learnt that we can make do on v little and that although it has been tough, things will fingers crossed look up one day. My DH reached his overdraft limit weeks ago but when I get paid tomorrow it should help the 'crisis' situation we have found ourselves in. We are still in lots of debt but this has shown us that we need to be prepared for when another crisis hits. In this case it was DH starting a new job which means he hasn't had a full wage since July coupled with the house move. It has blindsided us because we were already very overdrawn. Next time we will be wiser.

And next week I am going to introduce DH to YNAB!

Fairy...Dh and I have had the exact same conversation this morning!
It's been a tough month money wise.
Hoping for better next month - although it's a 5 weeker :(

payday - first day I have not had to pay off debt in 10 years.

Although I do have a rather nasty bill coming my way from HMRC which I have opted to pay up front rather than them messing with my tax code. it's annoying as it is just an error in my tax code so it's nothing I could have helped.

Will be transferring a little bit of money to my savings account today, very excited.

I have soooo much food in the house from being ill, DH just doesn't cook when I am ill, so need to do some serious batch cooking and meal planning. Thankfully I am starting to feel better from the surgery.

I have started writing a trashy romance novel to entertain myself - already have 20,000 words

Winterlover
Well done.
Fabulous mind set changes that will last you for ever.

MissAnnersley
Its a nice feeling isn't it.
And only those who have been in debt can truly understand.
and YYY to not letting HMRC mess about with codes. I always tell clients to write the cheque as the code changes are always a PITA

Thread 5 ready for when this one fills up
www.mumsnet.com/Talk/legal_money_matters/2193736-Debt-mutual-support-thread-number-5-the-light-at-the-end-of-the-tunnel-is-NOT-an-oncoming-train

Place marked

Time to

close this

thread

but PLEASE
if you have been lurking or just newly woken up to the fact that your debt problems need to be sorted,
come and join in the new thread and start to feel better about everything, not just the money.