partner said he'd rather go on holiday than get married

[Deenamumof1]

Hi im new to this, so bare with me.
recently me and my partner have been talking about getting married in 2018, we set a date without paying a deposit. But recently his parents have mentioned goingmon holiday to orlando for 3 weeks, im from the uk and flights to Orlando at the moment are are £3000 for me my partner and my son. I told my parner we need to decide wether we save for the wedding or America, he said he'd rather America, im a little upset as I really want to marry him hes an amazing father and I really love him, I just wish he wanted to marry me as much as I want to marry him. Im deverstated we have to say goodbye to the wedding :( just want someone to talk to

Realistically,
How much do I intend to save In four Years?

Serious question BTW

I'd go for the holiday ... Money spent on a great couple of weeks as opposed to one day

As said before, you can still have a lovely wedding day ..one day ,that doesn't cost the earth
It's the marriage that's important , not the wedding

I've been happily married 21 years this year ... Had a lovely but simple church wedding didn't cost too much because we wanted to spend on a good holiday after

Have you thought about things from your son's perspective at all?

Do you think he'd rather have 4 years of days out/ holidays etc or 4 years where you choose not to do such things and at the end of that he goes to one wedding where his Mum and Dad are all dressed up for no apparent reason as everything is exactly the same once they're home?

Exactly Bearbehind.

Tee hee this thread brightened up my commute home :o

Salong Bitches!!

No seriously OP, you should reflect on this thread because you've been given excellent advice. Somehow I doubt you will though :-|

Deena, you know you could get married at Disney. You could actually do as much princessy stuff as you like..When we were there we saw a bride go by in a horse drawn glass carriage. She even wore a TIARA!!

Mumblechum has got it spot on, now that there is no social
stigma about having children outside marriage, the only other reason to get married nowadays apparently is to get to behave like a spoilt brat aka Bridezilla.

There's nothing 'traditional' about spending a small fortune on an overblown wedding

Absolutely.

Sacrificing 8 years of holidays for a big party on one day is fair enough if that is what you and your partner want, but it doesn't really have much to do with marriage.

Hardly fair on her DS though is it Merry?

"Sacrificing 8 years of holidays for a big party on one day is fair enough if that is what you and your partner want, but it doesn't really have much to do with marriage."

^^ This

mumblechum has it spot on

Basically, the general consensus is that you seem to have your priorities the wrong way round. There is nothing wrong in wanting a lovely wedding. If you can't afford the wedding you want and are prepared to sacrifice everything else for the sake of one day to get the wedding you want, it makes me wonder whether you actually want to be married or just be the centre of attention for one day.

I agree patience.

If you asked a 7 year old boy (age he'll be in 2018) if he wanted 3 weeks in Florida or a 1 day wedding where he is likely to have to wear a suit of some description and which won't change anything with his family set up which do you think he'd chose every time....?

Hardly fair on her DS though is it Merry?

Whether or not he has a vote on the dream wedding is a whole other thread!

To be devil's advocate, if they had spent the money on the dream wedding before he was born, he still wouldn't have had the Florida holiday, it just wouldn't have ever been a possibility.

My main point is that the OP is confusing marrying somebody with having a wedding.