Support thread for those experiencing or recently experienced a MC/MMC - Thread 3. ALL welcome!

[AMS19]

Previous thread:

www.mumsnet.com/Talk/miscarriage/4139555-Support-thread-for-those-experiencing-or-recently-experienced-a-MC-MMC-Thread-2-ALL-welcome?pg=1

@CocoLoco88 @Pettylamby @KJLM @Pimmsandprimroses @MysteryB23 @Redfoxinthesnow @Sherryxxxx @TheDaydreamBelievers @SuzieDeLaTour @Seasalt1984 @Mellous @Summersun001*@DMT1982 @Neady1980* @tamsin424 @Scottishskifun @MysteryB33 @Gillsa2000 @Slk3558 @Jam291 @Gymbelle @mia2201 @Applecrumble24 @Jujujuberry @Enola41 @Ralala @wag1987 @glowingtwig

Sorry if I've missed anyone, MN wasn't showing me everyone who had posted xx

@Ralala yes I'm just going to not get it I think and carry on TTC! Hopefully I'll be pregnant and then decision is made anyway!

morning morning ladies. I’ve been a bit absent recently just busy at work and making the most of the warm weather in the garden.

I was going to post about vaccines a while back however wasn’t sure if it was the right time really so didn’t.

I won’t be having the vaccine purely due to there being no long term research on it’s possible impact on fertility or pregnancy. Initially the government said not to TTC for 2 months after having and then a couple of months later said it’s fine if trying to conceive. I’m just not willing to take the risk especially after the Thalidomide scandal years ago. Once I’ve had a successful pregnancy then I’ll be more than happy to have it.

Equally everyone is different and I would never judge anyone for having the vaccine if TTC as it’s a personal choice.

Another thing that sticks with me and this could just be bad luck but I never had the flu vaccine but decided to last year when I was 8.5 weeks pregnant. I miscarried less than 48 hours later. Could just be bad luck, could have been a cause, I’ll never know. I am by no way anti vaccine and in once I am older I will have the flu jab again but not while I am pregnant or TTC xxx

@DMT1982 hello lovely. I completely agree with your stance. There just isn't enough evidence to proven it is safe and my GP even now is advising against it whilst TTC so I absolutely will not be taking the risk. But it is am individual choice and depends on your circumstances. I'm so paranoid about another miscarriage I just couldn't live with myself if it caused issues. In a year or so I'm sure the evidence will show one way or another as the US have taken a different stance to us xx

@AMS19 yes absolutely and depends on the individual and circumstances as there are a lot of people who are high risk so the risk element outweighs the unknown risks of the vaccine on fertility etc.

Like you I am just so scared of putting anything into my body that could potentially risk another miscarriage and its not been an easy decision and one that I’ve spent a lot of time researching to make this decision. I don’t really like debates on political things or vaccines and try to just sit back and let them wash over me but because there is a lot of mixed messages out there at the mo in relation to the vaccine and pregnancy I thought I would jump in and post my views and again they are personal views and I do not want to upset anyone so if I have I apologise xxxx

Hello everyone, I’ve just read everyone’s messages since I last caught up with the thread so I think I’m now up to date. I wanted to say welcome to all the newcomers and that as a relative latecomer to this thread, how helpful it has been - I hope you find the same.

I am now just over six weeks post-med management of my MMC. Hospital confirmed a couple of weeks ago that everything had passed and last week I got a negative on an FRER which felt like a nice milestone.

However... no sign of my period yet. 😒😒😒 Prior to getting pregnant my periods were madly spaced apart - after coming off the pill in Feb last year I had a six month wait followed by a three month wait, so I only actually had two bleeds in the whole year.

Just wanted to rant a little about now being back in the position of the never ending wait to have a period!! 😂 I have been investigated for all the usual (PCOS, thyroid etc.) but nobody has really come up with anything conclusive yet for the mad cycles and have mostly offered “could be because you’ve been on the pill” which frankly doesn’t feel like much consolation.

I am super happy for everyone who is currently having a mega period (never thought I’d be wishing that on anyone!) and hope that the symptoms aren’t too problematic for anyone.

Hope everyone is doing well and looking forward to hearing more updates of periods and hopefully more good news is just around the corner, at least for somebody! X

Whatever you all decide to do re vaccine, go you! You've made the best decision for you.

Hi @cocoloco88 good to hear from you. I had what I classed as a period one month after my mva, however it was very very light, spotting for 2 days and no pad needed. Then the spotting started again CD20 but the first proper beast period not until CD24. So if ignore both lots of spotting, proper period was 8 weeks after mva. Hopefully your body is just taking a little time to adjust and you won't go back to the epic cycles you had previously. Are you tracking ovulation?

Morning ladies. May I p/s join. A bit confused at the moment. Had a mc late jan at 11 weeks. Af came back around 4 weeks. I read and thought it would be heavier, longer etc. but mines was as it normally was before the mc. Had a few cramps and felt a bit tired and cold as I normally do. It wasnt heavy and also lasted for 5 days as normal. Is this normal or will i bleed again in a few days? I want to ttc and start testing after my first AF as advised from the EPU. Will I ovulate, is it safe ttc. Thanks in advance

@Lizbb my first period was very light, only spotting. But I did then ovulate the cycle after. So assuming you have negative pregnancy tests now, you will be absolutely fine to try again now 😊

Super interesting to hear your thoughts on the vaccine. I'm definitely not anti vaccine but I have been worrying about the prospect of what to do when I get offered it. Luckily I will be working from home for the foreseeable future and as I'm 29 and not high risks or working in anything that puts me face-to-face with anyone I'll be on the last to get offered the vaccine list and hopefully by then I'll be pregnant. If I was high risk or working in a front facing role obviously things would be different.

My brother-in-law is due to get married at the end of August abroad, where he lives, and it has been worrying me that places might start saying you can't go there unless you've had the vaccine or are exempt. If I fell pregnant hopefully that would be valid exemption, but if not not sure what to do. We haven't told my in-laws we are ttc or about the MC. I'm sure my mil would understand but not sure o want to have the conversation with my fil as feel like he'd just think I should have the vaccine and pause ttc for a few months, when to be that is the furthest thing I want. Also I'm guessing then my partner's family would all end up knowing as I wouldn't be there. I'm really hoping I'll be pregnant by then as my due date was start of August and in my mind really want to be pregnant before that. I don't want to stop my partner from going to his brother's too if I can't go. It's such a minefield and causing me lots of worry but I'm sure I'm running away with the worry too much.

On the plus side I went for a run yesterday as have been feeling absolutely awful all week and hoped it would help with the ridiculously awful cramps I had and it really did help. I haven't been running since my mc in December, as I went for a run a few days before the mc and stupidly got in my head I caused it by doing it but feel I'm breaking that connotation now and hoping to get my body as healthy and nourishing as possible for my rainbow baby. I also started on the pom juice last night @AMS19 🤞😊

@PlantMummy87 hello lovely 😊 yes vaccine passports would be such a pain wouldn't it! Like you, my due date with mid July so praying I'll be pregnant by then 🙏

Absolutely brilliant going for a run...well done you! I've hardly left the house but forcing myself to do 10k a day in steps during March. I live on the river Thames so no excuse. And great stuff on the pom too. Sounds super positive xx

If I'm not pregnant when I get a vaccination appointment then I'll have the vaccine.
I have several friends who have long covid they are early 30s although research is still ongoing into it and the vaccine I know I would struggle to cope.

It's completely personal choice I think the message hasn't been clear enough, and is changing as data gets examined by more experts (which is also normal)
The UK has some of the strictest guidelines in the world on medicines and ethics. They obviously don't test on pregnant women and so go for full precautionary approach.

But they aren't great at then explaining why the advice then changes. So for BF mums it's because a team of BF and drug experts examined each component of the vaccines once the data was made public. They confirmed that there was no risk so advice changed to include BF mums were good to be vaccinated as well.

For TTC its again not that it has any effect on fertility but in early days of approval again precautionary approach.

Having the jab whilst pregnant is only currently recommended if high risk. This isn't to do with not being safe just UK ethics. It's because of the 60s scandal that the UK is this strict.

The USA in comparison doesn't say any of the above really and says its personal choice so pregnant women can and are being vaccinated. So yes there will be more data.

Just wanted to give some background information as the govt rarely explains in a straight forward way why advice changes which means people are left feeling uncertain.

@Scottishskifun thanks that is super helpful!

That's super helpful thanks @Scottishskifun I had known it didn't impact fertility, my concern is any risk to the embryo. That's the risk I cannot take until there is evidence to show otherwise. But once again, I work from home full time and so does my husband, so our situation is different to someone who is at risk as part of their job. That's why it has to be an individual choice based on someone's circumstances at the time. My GP has advised again it anyway while TTC so I can't have it even if I wanted to as it would be against medical advice. Hopefully we will continue to get more data as ultimately the most important thing is women make informed decisions x

@Scottishskifun thanks for posting and explaining it all because you’re right there isn’t anywhere that’s explains their rationale unless you research it yourself xx

@PlantMummy87 I was also running pre miscarriage and had been for a run the day before my first miscarriage at 5.5 weeks. The doctor said it would not have caused it and although I knew that you do wonder as only natural.

Just so you know I ran up until I was around 25 weeks pregnant with my little boy and only stopped as my back began to complain a little. I felt it was good for my health and babies health plus kept me active.

I think whatever exercise you choose usually makes you feel better afterwards even if at the time it’s hard graft.

I found it really difficult to get my exercise Mojo back following my miscarriages and only really started back again about 3 weeks ago. The warmer weather helps and natural sunlight for vitamin D. I think if that’s what makes you feel better then that’ll help you longer term relax when trying to conceive. If I’m feeling ratty then a run always clears my head xxx

Ps I second Pom juice and pineapple is a fab post workout/run snack plus the core for a fluffy womb lining xx

@DMT1982 have you had any results back yet?

@SuzieDeLaTour thinking about you xx

@AMS19 no haven’t had results back yet however have had a copy of the letter from my consultant to my doctor following the initial consultation. He has said the initial diagnosis is post infective IBS which if it is that is great even though so treatment as such it isn’t anything serious and something I can live with and manage. Thanks for asking and as soon as I have the actual results I’ll let you know. I only got that letter yesterday xxx

@DMT1982 that does sound positive, as in some ways a diagnosis is better than none, especially when it's something that can be treated. Also means no risk in terms of miscarriage so hopefully will give you more confidence when the time is right to start TTC again xx

Happy to provide background info and it's only because I have a science background and kept up to date with the BF developments (was BF my toddler til Nov) that I'm aware.

None of the lab studies have shown any side effects in pregnant animals (which is why the US is able to say personal choice). The UK is reliant on natural data development, I agree with the ethic standards they take but because they don't explain them it leaves people confused!
It's the same process for every drug development not just new vaccines.

@AMS19 thanks lovely!! Heading there now - lots of butterflies!! Hope you’re all enjoying the lovely sunshine ☀️ x

@AMS19 yes I agree having a diagnosis is much better than being left in limbo and IBS doesn’t have an effect on conceiving as long as all my vitamin levels remain at a decent level which I will find out when I get the results back.

I did have to cut out dairy for a week to see if that was causing it and luckily it wasn’t because everything has milk in it!

How you getting on with your gluten free diet?

@Scottishskifun that’s great you have a scientific background thank you xxx

@DMT1982 gluten free is surprisingly easy! I'm not being as strict before ovulation, and I'm not avoiding food that has been in contact with gluten, only food that contains gluten. But because I was following a medderterranean diet and I rarely eat carbs it has changed too much! Trying to be a bit better on the diet because I've definitely been sneaking in too many chocs! Will be enjoying a few glass of wine over the next week before ovulation xx

Hasn't changed*