Oh Lovelylou -- I envy your patience. Unfortunately, this is exactly the kind of experience I made here in the UK (am from aborad, so not used to the healthcare system).
I hindsight I should not have waited and endured so much but been more proactive and determined. It's just very hard to do, especially when you are grieving and don't know how to make it through the day. I think you should ask politely when the results have come back and then write a complaint letter to doctor and NHS. I am still waiting for the response to mine (I wrote several), but writing them has been very helpful in itself.
Also understand everybodies reaction to pg-ladies. I have 3 in my immidiate environment and referred to them in my mind only to 'the bellies'. I agree, women do not understand unless they have been through it themselves.
Ellie, can't you turn down the assignment. It could turn out both ways, but it might end up being torture for you and that's the last thing you need right now.
Popsy, I guess I have to out myself: I thought for 4 months I would have Asherman's syndrome (scarring to the uterus that can be so severe that no menstruation occurs) and was seriously wondering if there is permanent dammage to my fertility (I have a lot of anger and dispair left from that time as you can all tell). I was told they probably would have to remove scar tissue, then set a coil in for several months and put my on hormone therapy (that diagnosis came after the molar pregnancy and the ectopic one, which were both wrong). As it turned out, the scar tissue was only at the cervix and I didn't have Ashermans. I ended up falling pregnant again very soon after the hysteroscopy and
currently 14 weeks.
It is difficult because although I am very happy, I grief at the same time for the baby I lost and think of her daily. And having been the 1:500000, I expect I will be the 1:400 who will be having the child with Down syndrome and the 1:100 with the 2nd trimester
miscarraige etc. But I have to say that the grief becomes easier with time (not less, just 'less overwhelming'). About seing pg
ladies and colleagues -- it got a lot worse for me over time and I still avoid them including my friends, although I am technically one of them. I think I am envious of their naivity and happiness while we are very aware that it might happen again.
Sorry for telling you maybe more than you want to hear right now. I was just touched by
LovelyLou's posts and thought it might help, that we all have been in one way or the other the 1: xxx.
When you are ready there is a lovely TTC after mc (retrun to the mothership) thread
under conception, where there are women actively trying and women waiting for the period when they can TTC again. (There was a women with molar pregnancy there, but I haven't heard form her in a while).