Recurrent Miscarriage Support Thread 29 - Support for Tests, Treatments and Trying Again

[barkingtreefrog]

Support, hugs, a wealth of collective knowledge and lots of hand holding as we try again. This thread moves like lightning so prepare to read fast!

Previous thread here

Link to the RMC investigations information

Stats update:

allthereis: 29. DC, 4MC
anniehoo: 42. TTC#1 for 2.5yrs, 4MC
barkingtreefrog: 36. TTC#1 since Dec 11, 2MC
bettybutterchops: 40. DS, 3MC, pg
bootles: 41. DS, 1TFMR, 4MC, pg
brummiegirl: 38. TTC#1 since Apr 14, 3MC, pg
bubblybubbles80: 34. TTC#1, 3MC
bumblebee0: 29. DS, 2MC, pg
bunnymad: 40. DD, 2MC
bythesea82: 33. TTC#1 since Dec 12, 3MC, pg
casiopeia: . TTC#1, 3MC
chrystley: 41. DD, 5MC, pg
cloudjumper: 43. DS, 4MC, pg
confu3ed: 39. DS, DD, 5MC, pg
desperatelyhopeful: DS, 10 MC.
emerald72: 43. DS, 3MC
enlightenedbunny: 34. TTC#1 since '10, 1TFMR, 3MC, pg
erica21: 32. DS, 2MC, pg
extrablessings: 33. DS, 6MC
fackinell: 44. TTC#1, 4MC
fififolle: 37. DC, 2MC, pg
flen: 36. TTC#1, 3MC, pg
floweroct: 34. TTC#1 since 11, 3MC
frecklefire: 40. DS, 3MC
genwah85: 29. DS, 3MC, pg
girliesaints: 37. DD, 4MC (1 twins)
girlinoz: 32. TTC#1, 3 MC
Ifinishedthebiscuits: 37. 2DS, 4MC
iloveyoubaby: . DD, 2MC
inamaymaybewrong. 37. DS, 2MC
jady77: 37. TTC#1 since Sep 14, 2MC, pg
kazz2112: 31. TTC#1 since Feb 14, 3MC
lauren83: 31. TTC #1 for 7yrs, 2MC (1 twins)
leah1984: . TTC#1, 2MC
loopyaboutmy2boys: 38. 2DS, 6MC
lovemylittlebear: 29. 1 ectopic, 2MC, pg
marchgirl: 37. DD, 5MC, pg
maverick79: 35. TTC#1, 2MC, pg
me2me2: 2DC, 2MC
mimidoddrioni: 35. TTC#1, 2MC
minnie74: 40. DS, 3MC, pg
monten: 37. TTC#1 since Apr 13, 1TFMR, 1MC
morganlefey: 29. DD, 3MC
mrsb0710: 29. TTC#1, 2MC
mrsconfusion: 36. DD, 3MC, pg
mrsdiddlydoo: 34. DS, 2MC, pg
notspartacus: 39. 2DD, 2 ectopic , 3MC
onedaymaybe1: 32. TTC#1, 3MC
onestep2015: 39. TTC#1 since May 13, 3MC, 1 ectopic /PUL
patienceisvirtuous: 37. TTC#1 since Mar 14, 2MC, pg
peqpit: 33. TTC#1 for 2yrs, 3MC
portmoon: 43. DS, DD, 5MC
sallywade: 36. DS, 1TFMR, 5MC, pg
sashakerr: 37. DS, 3MC
sebsmummy: 40. DS, 3MC, pg
sizethree: 35, TTC#1, 3MC, pg
snoopysimaginaryfriend: 29. TTC#1 since Sep 14, 3MC
spamminit: 25. 2DS, 2MC
strubidooo: 34. TTC#1 since Sep 12, 3MC, 1 ect
sunandrainbow: 38, TTC#1, 4MC, pg
teach3: 27. TTC#1, 3MC
texta: 32. TTC#1, 3MC
thepopandcry: 38, DS, 4MC
thornfield38: 34. TTC#1 for 2 yrs, 2MC, pg
tomcat81: 34. TTC#1 since Oct 14, 2MC
twilightstruggle: TTC#1 since Nov 12, 5MC
wadsy: 36. DS, 1 ectopic , 4 MC, pg

ourdaywillcome
daisybell

Thread babies
bakingtins: 40. 2DS, 4MC. Faith born May 14
tannyloo: 42, 2DS, 5MC. Bertie born Mar 15
tinytear: 41. DD, 5MC. Alice born Mar 15
justonemoretime: 39. 3MC. Scott born May 15
purplefrogshoes: 38. 2MC, 1CMP. John born May 15
longestlurkerever: 34. DD, 3MC. Beth born Jun 15
catlover2014: 35. TTC#1 since 09, 3MC. Louis born Jun 15
boozle80: 34. 3MC. Mhairi born Jun 15
belleende: 40. TTC#1, 2MC, 1 TFMR. Cissy born Jun 15

Great news March . And also good that you had the decision taken away from you - I like it when I can't make a decision then suddenly I don't have to. I hope the scan next week shows no further growth on the haematoma and you can go on holiday feeling positive (as much as that is possible at all anyway).

Sasha come rant on here instead, we get it. I hate those events in the future where you think 'it'll be okay because I'm be pg by then' and then it's now, and you're not . It does not necessarily mean anything is wrong if you don't get pg immediately though, try and hang on to that.

monten yes, we're going private with some help from the MiL
It really is one long interminable waiting game. Or that mountain that you keep climbing with no knowledge of whether the top is actually accessible!

October does not feel very soon to me at all - I can't get pg without help so waiting for an appointment effectively means no ttc for at least 2 months and probably more as I don't know if there's then a wait for treatment. So not a hope of getting pg and only a tiny hope then until November?

I'm currently hassling talking nicely to the receptionist about cancellations....

Good news about your scan march, although I can understand your worry about the haematoma. Hoping it at least doesn't grow for next week. X

Glad the measurement and heartbeat were good march, can understand the haematoma is worrying. Glad they have booked you for another scan next week.

barking I can imagine October feels like a bloody age away, hope all the being nice to gets you a lovely cancellation.

march glad you had a good scan and baby was measuring right on dates. Sorry you're having such a worry with the hematoma. I don't really know much about them but can see it would add another layer of worry. Glad you're being rescanned before you go away though and hopefully it'll give some reassurance. Xx

barking hope the weeks fly by till oct or the secretary manages to get you a cancellation. Time seems to just drag when you want something sorting out quickly.
Also I'm so envious of how you've found exercise that you love. I just can't find anything I really love. I hate running with a passion though really want to like it. Cycling scares me a little though I did like it as a child (dh's sister was killed in a cycling/car accident which adds to the fear a bit). I really worry that ds will turn into some couch potato because we don't really do anything. I used to go to the gym with a trainer twice a week which I enjoyed but I just can't afford it any more (I need the kick up the arse!) Sorry for the giant rant there but I feel like a major slob at the moment!

March** i understand why you feel after the scan. But glad all else looks positive and hb was sound xxx

Sasha** we sound like we are in similar positions if only that we both normally get pregnant by sitting next to our dh and this time for some inexplicable reason our hyperfertility (which, lets face it, was the only silver lining in this ripped bag of shite situation) appears to have jogged the fuck on! Yes, indeed it is a perplexing one (she said calmly taking q10 with one hand and a double gin with the other). I would have been 38 weeks now and not returning to a job i loath in september if it had worked out. I also have 4 mates who are due in september. Jesus wept! I don't know how long my steely nerves will hold out before i have another melt-down.

I found my scan notes today from my Feb mc and it said "endometrium appears thickened at 20mm but no definite RPOC seen (do you think that refers to pcos???) So of course now the cold fear that i might have endometriosis is searing through me. That would mean i couldn't get pergnant i think. Anyone got any useful information on this area to shed any light for me???

march - glad scan went well lovely and all measuring correctly. I know nothing about haematomas but can imagine it's causing you extra worry that you really don't need at the moment. Fingers crossed that it gets absorbed. Am so pleased they are keeping a close eye on you and will scan again next week.

minnie - if you like cycling but don't like the danger aspect, have you tried a spinning class? I got quite addicted to mine - disco lights and loud music kind of make you feel like you are in a bar or club rather than an excercice class - at least that's what I try to convince myself!!

freckle - haven't really got any wise words about the RPOC / PCOS question, except that hopefully if they thought it could cause an issue they would have mentioned at the time. Could you push docs for a rescan when you see them tomorrow based on your concerns.

X

.... freckle - just googled RPOC - stands for 'retained products of conception'. So with absolutely no medical background or knowledge, to me it sounds like they were just commenting that your lining was still thickened from the pg, but that they couldn't see any 'retained products' - god I hate that phrase. X

minnie I'm so sorry about your DH's sister. How awful . I cycle to work through central London every day and it does worry me. I really enjoy it though and it's a good way to get exercise in your day. It's also a good way to get aggression out your system, in fact just now I screamed at a white van man for driving down the middle of the road and pushing me to the side .

barking am so glad MIL was able to help you pursue a private route. Fuck the NHS postcode lottery. I hope you can get an earlier appointment.

sasha cool lets do a London meet up in September then? We can drink wine and smoke fags and set the world to rights unless we get BFPs before then I've also had a dubious experience with a private consultant. Like you I had (limited) PMI so I went to see a gynaecologist about my light periods. He's an ashermans specialist. But all he did (for £500) was scan me (which the NHS had already done) and then (despite the scan being clear)!say I needed a hysterocopy to rule out ashermans - at a cost of £5k . He also advised I consider IVF, with the genetic selection bit (approx £8k?) despite the fact I had (at the time) gotten pregnant twice naturally in 12 months. I just felt he was trying to extract money from me . I know it's much easier said than done but I would try and forget about your cycle worries for now, but temp this month so you have a better picture of what's going on. It's perfectly possible/normal to have one screwy cycle and then go back to normal next time.

girlie I hope the date for your hysterocopy comes through soon. They knew both my first losses were chromosomal, which i guess is what the difference is.

freckle sounds like what sun says sounds about right. It's awful reading through notes and spotting something that makes your stomach drop. Hopefully your appointment with the female GP tomorrow will be fruitful.

I can't decide whether to have a follow up scan. It all seems to have gone quite straightforwardly. Bleeding stopped. IC almost negative, squinter of a line this morning. If I go for a scan I need to go back to the EPU (shudder) and arrive there by 7.45am to wait in the corridor before they open at 9am (any later and there's about 10 women in front of you) I just don't know if I have the strength. But I feel I should go to get closure and possibly ask if I will get any further follow up/testing. I just don't know what to do.

minnie I'm sorry, I just read that back and it sounded horribly insensitive putting a grinning face next to my altercation with the white van man after what you said about DH's sister. I'm sorry, I didn't mean to trivialise cycling safety. God that sounds worthy - you know what I mean.

monten don't be daft lovely, I didn't think anything of it at all! I didn't know dh's sister as it happened when she was 16 but it's obviously had a lasting effect. I'd love to feel brave enough to take on the roads on my bike and I love it lets you get a bit of your aggression out. Sounds a perfect way to end the day!
Queuing at your EPU for the scan sounds a bit of a nightmare. It doesn't seem long since your MC, after my med management I was told to retest after three weeks and only then get in touch if it was still positive. Could you maybe give it another week? Especially if you feel it's gone ok (if that's the right word under the circs).

freckle sorry you've had another worry on top of your other stresses. Maybe mention it all tomorrow and see if you can get some proper answers? Really hoping you feel you get listened to properly at your appointment.

sun I've never tried spinning though my brother went through a phase of loving it. Maybe I should brave a class. I'm at a loss really as my exercise partner was my dsil and since they moved to the U.S. 18 months ago I've had no-one local who's interested/has the spare time to go with. I'm just taking the lazy shy girls option of doing nothing!

Minnie, I have the same fear of cycling after having two friends killed off their bikes in my teenage years.

I also can't get my arse into gear to get fit (she says waiting for dominos to delivery ????) but I have swallowed the bullet and joined a local gym for dh & I through a salary sacrifice scheme. Starts the beginning of next month and I'm hoping I will go as I won't want to waste the money and I was a bit of a gym bunny before dd (or I will go to lovely cafe and eat cake!)

Oh sun**, you've lifted a bit of a weight from my shoulders there, thankyou! I should have googled that myself, thanks again. X

Quick jump on (or it would have been in MN hadn't logged me out and required second password reset this week!) to send hugs to March - good news on growth and heartbeat. I totally understand your worry about the haematoma but I'm reassured they're keeping an eye on you and I'm sure it will be fine. Sending extra-absorbent thoughts your way and hoping it's shrinking as we speak (if you know what I mean...).

Thanks for your kind words (and absorbent thoughts!) everyone. Good luck for tomorrow flen x

Oh my word I've missed so much!!!!!! Great news about all the scans. Cloud I've still no idea about what to do for birth options.

Monten glad work is going ok - and hey crack open all the fags you need!

Barking October is ages away! Hope you are enjoying having DH home now

Have tried to read back over everything but hope everyone is doing ok and sorry for peeps I've missed. I'm not feeling great at moment (physically) hate moaning but literally cannot function at moment. But I feel grateful to feel this shit

Good luck Flen x

Good luck for today flen, thinking of you v much.

Anyone else today or all Thurs/Fri?

Best of luck today flen. x

Wish mumsnet would sort their security out!

March so glad your scan went well. And Flen good luck.

Brummie hope you feel better soon. How often are you being sick? I saw your Facebook post, at least you had a bag to hand! I never really had sickness apart from when I was over enthusiastic with brushing my teeth, but I did used to get the nausea unless I ate frequently. I used to drink a pint of milk before I even got out of bed, and that used to settle my stomach and get rid of the burps, and then as long as I made sure I ate throughout the day then I was ok. Whether it would work for you I don't know. I had a friend who had horrific HG through 2 pregnancies so am conscious that some people have nothing that will help them. Her second one she was hospitalised loads and the doctors ended up delivering him about 5 weeks Early by CS because she was so ill from HG.

Meanwhile, approx 6 dpo and feeling my usual sensations that make me fully expect a BFP in due course. Feeling very down this morning, that why should this one end any differently and that if I get the BFP as I expect then it's going to end up being miscarriage number 7 and what's the point. Think I'm at peace with not taking progesterone this cycle, for my sanity I need to rule out the possibility that it is making my body reject everything that tries to implant. I know it goes against the protocol that so many of you are following but I can't shake the feeling that the last 3 pregnancies were my earliest 3 losses and those were all ones where I took progesterone. Without progesterone I'd had a spontaneous MC, which I'd had a small fall before and everyone said it wouldn't have caused it but I can't shake the thought it caused it. My second was a mmc at 6+4, which my gut is that it was likely to be abnormal as it got past the implantation stage. My third was about 5 1/2 weeks and I think was caused by the blood clotting as I had the most horrendous sharp pain the day before I started bleeding, which I had never experience before or since. The last 3 mc's I have had no pain until the cramps/bleeding started, so they have been completely different to any of the first 3. I know I am rambling, and I know I will never know the causes and that no one can really help with any of this it it feels good just to dump my brain here, rather than it going round and round in my head!

Good luck today Flen and March glad scan was good, try not to worry about hematoma I don't know much about them either but just be guided by your consultant.

Had busy day yesterday and missed loads! Quick read through now.

Was it Minnie about cycling? I did a cycling course thing few years ago to get me back on the roads as hadn't done it for years, it worked! I like spin too and also pretend I'm in a club lol,

I'd be up for London meet up! We have got one arranged at Bluewater for Kent people on 4 October if anyone else wants to come?

Just wanted to say goodbye guys before my username stops working.

I've been caught up in the hacking crisis that's going on at the moment. They don't seem to have my correct password but I've started to get some weird shit going on with my email and also text messages!! I don't feel safe on here anymore so I've decided to leave.

I will still be on Facebook, so hopefully keep in touch with everyone on there. Huge hugs to everyone, you've been a lifeline to me since February xxxx

Oh no Sebs that's scary stuff! What a thing to happen?! See you on fb xx

Good luck today flen

sebs that's awful and pretty scary. Glad we'll still see you on FB x

Goodluck today Flen! Thimking of you X

Hi all, managed to get back in to mn! Just letting you all know that the scan was fine and we are officially out of the EPU. 12 week scan next Tiesday....