Recurrent Miscarriage Support Thread 29 - Support for Tests, Treatments and Trying Again

[barkingtreefrog]

Support, hugs, a wealth of collective knowledge and lots of hand holding as we try again. This thread moves like lightning so prepare to read fast!

Previous thread here

Link to the RMC investigations information

Stats update:

allthereis: 29. DC, 4MC
anniehoo: 42. TTC#1 for 2.5yrs, 4MC
barkingtreefrog: 36. TTC#1 since Dec 11, 2MC
bettybutterchops: 40. DS, 3MC, pg
bootles: 41. DS, 1TFMR, 4MC, pg
brummiegirl: 38. TTC#1 since Apr 14, 3MC, pg
bubblybubbles80: 34. TTC#1, 3MC
bumblebee0: 29. DS, 2MC, pg
bunnymad: 40. DD, 2MC
bythesea82: 33. TTC#1 since Dec 12, 3MC, pg
casiopeia: . TTC#1, 3MC
chrystley: 41. DD, 5MC, pg
cloudjumper: 43. DS, 4MC, pg
confu3ed: 39. DS, DD, 5MC, pg
desperatelyhopeful: DS, 10 MC.
emerald72: 43. DS, 3MC
enlightenedbunny: 34. TTC#1 since '10, 1TFMR, 3MC, pg
erica21: 32. DS, 2MC, pg
extrablessings: 33. DS, 6MC
fackinell: 44. TTC#1, 4MC
fififolle: 37. DC, 2MC, pg
flen: 36. TTC#1, 3MC, pg
floweroct: 34. TTC#1 since 11, 3MC
frecklefire: 40. DS, 3MC
genwah85: 29. DS, 3MC, pg
girliesaints: 37. DD, 4MC (1 twins)
girlinoz: 32. TTC#1, 3 MC
Ifinishedthebiscuits: 37. 2DS, 4MC
iloveyoubaby: . DD, 2MC
inamaymaybewrong. 37. DS, 2MC
jady77: 37. TTC#1 since Sep 14, 2MC, pg
kazz2112: 31. TTC#1 since Feb 14, 3MC
lauren83: 31. TTC #1 for 7yrs, 2MC (1 twins)
leah1984: . TTC#1, 2MC
loopyaboutmy2boys: 38. 2DS, 6MC
lovemylittlebear: 29. 1 ectopic, 2MC, pg
marchgirl: 37. DD, 5MC, pg
maverick79: 35. TTC#1, 2MC, pg
me2me2: 2DC, 2MC
mimidoddrioni: 35. TTC#1, 2MC
minnie74: 40. DS, 3MC, pg
monten: 37. TTC#1 since Apr 13, 1TFMR, 1MC
morganlefey: 29. DD, 3MC
mrsb0710: 29. TTC#1, 2MC
mrsconfusion: 36. DD, 3MC, pg
mrsdiddlydoo: 34. DS, 2MC, pg
notspartacus: 39. 2DD, 2 ectopic , 3MC
onedaymaybe1: 32. TTC#1, 3MC
onestep2015: 39. TTC#1 since May 13, 3MC, 1 ectopic /PUL
patienceisvirtuous: 37. TTC#1 since Mar 14, 2MC, pg
peqpit: 33. TTC#1 for 2yrs, 3MC
portmoon: 43. DS, DD, 5MC
sallywade: 36. DS, 1TFMR, 5MC, pg
sashakerr: 37. DS, 3MC
sebsmummy: 40. DS, 3MC, pg
sizethree: 35, TTC#1, 3MC, pg
snoopysimaginaryfriend: 29. TTC#1 since Sep 14, 3MC
spamminit: 25. 2DS, 2MC
strubidooo: 34. TTC#1 since Sep 12, 3MC, 1 ect
sunandrainbow: 38, TTC#1, 4MC, pg
teach3: 27. TTC#1, 3MC
texta: 32. TTC#1, 3MC
thepopandcry: 38, DS, 4MC
thornfield38: 34. TTC#1 for 2 yrs, 2MC, pg
tomcat81: 34. TTC#1 since Oct 14, 2MC
twilightstruggle: TTC#1 since Nov 12, 5MC
wadsy: 36. DS, 1 ectopic , 4 MC, pg

ourdaywillcome
daisybell

Thread babies
bakingtins: 40. 2DS, 4MC. Faith born May 14
tannyloo: 42, 2DS, 5MC. Bertie born Mar 15
tinytear: 41. DD, 5MC. Alice born Mar 15
justonemoretime: 39. 3MC. Scott born May 15
purplefrogshoes: 38. 2MC, 1CMP. John born May 15
longestlurkerever: 34. DD, 3MC. Beth born Jun 15
catlover2014: 35. TTC#1 since 09, 3MC. Louis born Jun 15
boozle80: 34. 3MC. Mhairi born Jun 15
belleende: 40. TTC#1, 2MC, 1 TFMR. Cissy born Jun 15

Gosh it's taken me a while to catch up today! Today I am on a mission to avoid all alcohol. Every night since the mc was confirmed on Tuesday has been sponsored by wine. DH is really rough today and is really really down. I hate seeing him so fed up. It's soooo tough.

As for the work quandary I totally feel your pain and can especially relate to whoever talked about having new Heads and Deputies coming in. Our school currently has an executive head from a local school that he's turned around and hes brought in a new deputy. He scares the hell out of me BUT when I've been to speak to him (nearly had a panic attack ) about my situation he was incredibly supportive. Knowing full well the situation he also promoted me just before we finished and raved how amazing my interview was and "how far I have potential to go'. So I think I'm fairly safe. Needless to say I'm not against a bit of buttering up the right people even if I think they're complete knobs. Despite the school being in an awful position and the pressure being immense atm I think I'm best staying put for now. dreading results day on Thursday. I've never worked so hard and I hope it shows!

Monten I can't bring myself to poas atm. Even though hcg was down at 9 on Monday. I'm going to ring the EPU tomorrow and demand a scan to check it's all gone.

barking, hope your enjoying lots of welcome home cuddles with dh by now x

Have you had any more bleeding kazz? I honestly think you will be ok and it will be all gone, but if it puts your mind at rest then definitely worth getting checked out to stop you worrying before hols.

flen, yes, dtd is fine! I'm impressed. I don't think i could bring myself to do it at the moment and feel a bit bad for denying dh.

I'm still not sure what to do about the scan. I know if i was advising someone else (and therefore more optimistic of a positive result), then i would say to get one, but I'm just feeling more negative about myself, and the worst situation would be to have bad news just before we're due to go. I think I'd rather go and enjoy the holiday being none the wiser and deal with things afterwards. I think I'll see what happens on Tuesday. It could all be academic if it's bad news. At least that would give me time to get an erpc before holidays so I'd rather find out then if it's going to be bad news.

monten, if it's positive at all, then it's only faintly positive. Are you waiting for a negative for getting some testing done or is it just for your own peace of mind that it's all gone? I think in a few days you won't see anything at all. Hugs. It's horrible to see that line still when all you want it to get it over with xx

Flen I like the hope in anger thing, in fact I like anger in situations as it Spurs me on to get things done or sorted. My mw told me before last MC that sex before 16wks can cause MC, I'd never heard it before and was ok with ds but it scared me too much last time so we didn't. Didn't matter in end anyway.

Freckle that all sounds really rubbish, but still you have a wicked sense of humour and you make me laugh! Go get it checked at docs sounds not nice to deal with. Nothing worse than hating your job either. I don't mind mine but think right now I just have other priorities like getting pg and going on mat leave again! Lost interest in work. I'm main breadwinner too here so got to keep going.

It was me recently who was told about the 8wk scan being more important than the 12wk, Mr Rai at St Marys said that . March if you're worried I would go to the scan before holiday and get peace of mind.

Barking hope dh is back with now and have a lovely evening together

Now on bus home so probably will miss things..sorry. On phone. Today would have been perfect to start telling work colleagues - not so many people in - as I am 17 weeks tomorrow. I think it must be noticeable. I couldn't do it - too filled with fear of jinxing and people being all yay, as very few know about the mc's.

march there's no right or wrong with the scan timing, you can only do what feels right for you. Just remember new egg new lining, you are definitely getting there!

flen dtd should be fine. emerald I don't know what mw told you that, I think it's a somewhat archaic view? And only for specific cases? As just says, as long as no-one has said don't, then it really should be fine.

monten this is my 7th pg using ics, and all the months ttc inbetween. I have to say they never develop an evap line with colour - only like a squinter of grey. I have usually had scans to confirm all the contents have gone, I think I was once told to test after 2 - 3 weeks, to check it was -ve. I think it just needs more time. Hugs x

freckle you are not past it. I meant to say before, after a pg when you sick until 30 weeks and a 5 day labour, its just as well your son is the demi-god you have referred to before! The heavy bleed sounds dreadful, huge hugs. This may feel like a stuck part of your life, but it WILL change, bit by bit x

As to the trapped by work thing. I have been for a long time. Along with a host of difficult major life events (as well as rmc) over the last 4 years. I have now resigned, with my last day in a few weeks, slightly scary, but I have other plans in place. We'll see. Mortgage must be paid! I hope its the beginning of the end of the stuckness, but hardly dare to hope.

Sorry March. Thought I had replied. Nope - had no more bleeding since pretty much Wednesday. So bled what I would consider to be pretty lightly between Sunday and Wednesday. Tuesday and Wednesday barely at all. My usual period is usually very heavy for 24hours and very clotty but I've had nothing like that. Hopefully I'll get reassurance tomorrow!

to everyone having a shit time. I havent posted much in the last couple of days - have just thrown myself into packing and cleaning for the move.

wrt maternity allowance for teachers - i had accepted my nqt position in june a week before i got a bfp so would not have accrued 26 weeks for MA before my due date as obviously it was a september start (having been a student for 3 years prior to this). I gave up that job so i could get a job starting sooner in order to get MA. Now i have no job and no baby - really angry that we were put in this position because if i hadnt given up the job we wouldnt have got MA but now im screwed careerwise.

Freckle Hugs hun. Its really crap. I too feel like I have reached 40 and my body has just gone f@*k off!! Never felt so bloody low and shite!!!

I'm freelance, the amount of weeks I have lost in money and work in miscarriages!!!!

Bootles it was my local mw that I saw for last pg. she is abit airy fairy and don't really know her but was first time I'd ever heard that!

Good luck to all those with scans tomorrow! X

kazz I hope you are doing ok and you get the reassurance you need today.

onestep it's just shit when you feel so crap. I think the feeling of being washed up at 40 is very familiar to many of us, and was put so well by freckle. Hope can be hard to hang onto sometimes, but hang onto it. X

emerald sorry if my post sounded stroppy! Didn't intend to. It's not something I have heard from a mw either.

Going to look back and check who has scans..

I think sex is fine too unless told otherwise. However I've been refraining for the first trimester just as an extra precaution apart from the other night when I couldn't wait any longer

freckle, onestep and anyone else, you are not past it lovelies. x

Good luck for the scans today bumble and cloud. Thinking of you both xx

Good luck bumble and cloud x

Good luck today bumble and cloud.

Back at work today, dreading it. Some people know but it's the curious/sympathetic looks from others im dreading. They know I haven't just had flu.

Glad you're keeping busy noodle. It does help. Leave yourself time to be sad too x

Massive reassuring squeezes to Bumble and cloud today.

Had an extremely vivid dream last night that I miscarried this pregnacy, I felt the blood flow and everything. It was so real that when I woke up I was thoroughly confused until I realised it hadn't actually happened. The rest of my night was shocking, the anxiety is never going to go.

Thinking of you today cloud and bumble.
Sebs, its horrible when dreams are so vivid. Hope you can put it behind you.

cloud, bumble sending good scan vibes and handholding.

sebs hugs for the dream. Vivid dreams just get you so deep. It's not real.

Good luck today Cloud and Bumble for your scans and Monten for back to work.

Vivid dreams are awful Sebs
I've just woken to find myself covered in sweat, crying and freaking out after dreaming that my best friend had been murdered in a forest and I had to go to work and was screaming at my mums and dad to make me cheese on toast. It then changed into my sister! Ughhhhh
horrible horrible horrible.

Good luck today bumble and cloud

Oh god Kazz that sounds about right, although it's also given me a craving for cheese on toast . Our dreams are our sub conscious having a field day. I have never had a premonition in my life so just praying it stats that way.

My nausea is terrible today. I'm gagging right and left. I think I'm nearly 15 weeks, can't believe it's still with me when I had two weeks of feeling 'a bit off' with DS's pregnant.

Actually could it be linked to the Cyclogest do you think?

Just phoned the local EPU to try to get a scan to make sure everything has gone but she said with my hcg levels last week or was unnecessary. Hope she's right. think I need to concentrate on not fretting now and get on with thinking holiday (and school work)

it wasn't even. Need to get my bruised backside out of bed to the gym. This last 7days of shit food and booze has seriously hampered my preholiday mission.

Good luck today cloud!

Hope your first day goes ok monten and isn't too upsetting.

Thank you ladies! Am sat in the waiting area of the antenatal clinic now, can't believe I'm here.

Very best of luck today cloud and bumble.

monten - hope first day back not too horrendous.

X