Recurrent Miscarriage Support Thread 29 - Support for Tests, Treatments and Trying Again

[barkingtreefrog]

Support, hugs, a wealth of collective knowledge and lots of hand holding as we try again. This thread moves like lightning so prepare to read fast!

Previous thread here

Link to the RMC investigations information

Stats update:

allthereis: 29. DC, 4MC
anniehoo: 42. TTC#1 for 2.5yrs, 4MC
barkingtreefrog: 36. TTC#1 since Dec 11, 2MC
bettybutterchops: 40. DS, 3MC, pg
bootles: 41. DS, 1TFMR, 4MC, pg
brummiegirl: 38. TTC#1 since Apr 14, 3MC, pg
bubblybubbles80: 34. TTC#1, 3MC
bumblebee0: 29. DS, 2MC, pg
bunnymad: 40. DD, 2MC
bythesea82: 33. TTC#1 since Dec 12, 3MC, pg
casiopeia: . TTC#1, 3MC
chrystley: 41. DD, 5MC, pg
cloudjumper: 43. DS, 4MC, pg
confu3ed: 39. DS, DD, 5MC, pg
desperatelyhopeful: DS, 10 MC.
emerald72: 43. DS, 3MC
enlightenedbunny: 34. TTC#1 since '10, 1TFMR, 3MC, pg
erica21: 32. DS, 2MC, pg
extrablessings: 33. DS, 6MC
fackinell: 44. TTC#1, 4MC
fififolle: 37. DC, 2MC, pg
flen: 36. TTC#1, 3MC, pg
floweroct: 34. TTC#1 since 11, 3MC
frecklefire: 40. DS, 3MC
genwah85: 29. DS, 3MC, pg
girliesaints: 37. DD, 4MC (1 twins)
girlinoz: 32. TTC#1, 3 MC
Ifinishedthebiscuits: 37. 2DS, 4MC
iloveyoubaby: . DD, 2MC
inamaymaybewrong. 37. DS, 2MC
jady77: 37. TTC#1 since Sep 14, 2MC, pg
kazz2112: 31. TTC#1 since Feb 14, 3MC
lauren83: 31. TTC #1 for 7yrs, 2MC (1 twins)
leah1984: . TTC#1, 2MC
loopyaboutmy2boys: 38. 2DS, 6MC
lovemylittlebear: 29. 1 ectopic, 2MC, pg
marchgirl: 37. DD, 5MC, pg
maverick79: 35. TTC#1, 2MC, pg
me2me2: 2DC, 2MC
mimidoddrioni: 35. TTC#1, 2MC
minnie74: 40. DS, 3MC, pg
monten: 37. TTC#1 since Apr 13, 1TFMR, 1MC
morganlefey: 29. DD, 3MC
mrsb0710: 29. TTC#1, 2MC
mrsconfusion: 36. DD, 3MC, pg
mrsdiddlydoo: 34. DS, 2MC, pg
notspartacus: 39. 2DD, 2 ectopic , 3MC
onedaymaybe1: 32. TTC#1, 3MC
onestep2015: 39. TTC#1 since May 13, 3MC, 1 ectopic /PUL
patienceisvirtuous: 37. TTC#1 since Mar 14, 2MC, pg
peqpit: 33. TTC#1 for 2yrs, 3MC
portmoon: 43. DS, DD, 5MC
sallywade: 36. DS, 1TFMR, 5MC, pg
sashakerr: 37. DS, 3MC
sebsmummy: 40. DS, 3MC, pg
sizethree: 35, TTC#1, 3MC, pg
snoopysimaginaryfriend: 29. TTC#1 since Sep 14, 3MC
spamminit: 25. 2DS, 2MC
strubidooo: 34. TTC#1 since Sep 12, 3MC, 1 ect
sunandrainbow: 38, TTC#1, 4MC, pg
teach3: 27. TTC#1, 3MC
texta: 32. TTC#1, 3MC
thepopandcry: 38, DS, 4MC
thornfield38: 34. TTC#1 for 2 yrs, 2MC, pg
tomcat81: 34. TTC#1 since Oct 14, 2MC
twilightstruggle: TTC#1 since Nov 12, 5MC
wadsy: 36. DS, 1 ectopic , 4 MC, pg

ourdaywillcome
daisybell

Thread babies
bakingtins: 40. 2DS, 4MC. Faith born May 14
tannyloo: 42, 2DS, 5MC. Bertie born Mar 15
tinytear: 41. DD, 5MC. Alice born Mar 15
justonemoretime: 39. 3MC. Scott born May 15
purplefrogshoes: 38. 2MC, 1CMP. John born May 15
longestlurkerever: 34. DD, 3MC. Beth born Jun 15
catlover2014: 35. TTC#1 since 09, 3MC. Louis born Jun 15
boozle80: 34. 3MC. Mhairi born Jun 15
belleende: 40. TTC#1, 2MC, 1 TFMR. Cissy born Jun 15

mrsc good luck for scan today

monten I absolutely know what you mean - there are so many sides to mc, one is losing that individual embryo/baby/pregnancy, all hopes dashed, the grief over it happening. Then another side is the sheer overwhelming feeling of having to go through the whole sodding process again. Like march, I (still) feel very angry about the time spent poas, then having endless appointments and scans, only to then have to start again. Try not to lose hope in the midst of the bleak feelings. And it may not take you a year again - it all seems a bit random sometimes as to when conception happens and when it doesn't. Hugs XXX

twilight really glad to hear you are feeling more yourself, long may it last.

flen don't give yourself a hard time for the anxiety! How can you be anything but?! Inevitable for us lot. You are doing really well though, getting there.

patience I think your erpc is today, thinking of you and it all goes as 'well' as it can x

onestep how are you doing at the moment?

I am part scientist part woo. Generally I suppress the woo, but it has a place. I saw 1 magpie the other day and said to do quick we need to see another...then explained about how often the magpie's are mentioned on here. He looked genuinely worried and started looking in earnest..quite funny.

OK can someone clarify that if I join the fb, we can only see each other? Not each others friends etc? Not that I have anything to hide! I just feel funny about fb in general. And though I have no profile picture can I add one just for this fb group? Otherwise a bit unfair to see you lot and not show myself...

Dp not do

mrsc I think they can do the NT at 11 weeks, but for your own reassurance maybe try to change it - or see if they will do another scan a couple of weeks after too?

bootles group members will be able to see your friends if your settings are that anyone (public) can see your friends anyway. Don't think you can set a profile picture just for the group. I am funny about fb but enjoying the group. It's hard keeping up! And boringly my profile pics are usually one of our dogs unless I'm feeling brave or super excited about a photo. You could always take a look and leave if its not for you?

I wouldn't consider that rude anyway... But maybe I'm odd...

bootles thanks for asking after me. I've spent all week with (sorry going to just say it) thrombosed piles, it's agony, have been suffering on and off over the years, last two have happened weeks after a miscarriage where my stomach is struggling to right itself, I get constipated for a few days. This time round is particularly bad, Dr has given me scheriproct which contains small amount of (pred steroid) but it's just not relieving my pain, so getting on the phone to the Drs again very shortly! Bloody piles!!!!!

Can I ask a question about acupuncture? I had my first session last week and since then I've felt pretty rubbish and now have the mother of all colds. Since having dd I'm never ill, so it does strike me there might be a link, particularly as I'm increasing thinking its an immune issue that's causing my Mcs. Anyone else had a similar experience or am clutching at straws? (Which I may very well be)

Hmm. Not had that with acu girlie, although it does all sorts of things so perhaps could being out an infection that was lurking? I'd ask at your next appt.

bootles, you could always make a new fb account for the secret group, that way you could put up a picture and you wouldn't have any friends for anyone to see. You'd probably need a new email but that's easy enough to make.

Urgh to piles onestep. I've had them since giving birth to dd and they are a right old pain in the ass (sometimes quite literally)

Thinking of you today patience xx

And you monten It doesn't matter what everyone else thinks, if you can take comfort in a butterfly flying past, then this is all that counts xxx

onestep Ouch! That sounds awful! I suffer mildly from piles sometimes, but that's nothing like what you are describing! Hope you can get something that works soon.

girlie It might well be that the cold is a reaction to acupuncture, sometimes it can cause quite strong reactions. However, on the other hand, it might not be! I think that acupuncture is definitely something to be reckoned with, though - I had it years ago for horrible migraine-headaches, and they have never come back. Who knows! Will you be going to Coventry to get your NK cells tested?

girlie I've never had acupuncture but I do know there is a terrible cold with a chesty cough going around at the moment!

I had reflexology for the first time a month ago and felt just awful for about a week afterwards...

Ooh I had reflexology on the same day as well so it could be that or equally it's a coincidence ! Either way wish it would bugger off!

Going to Coventry once I've had the hysteroscopy just in case it picks up something in the meantime.

Thanks mrsd and march re fb advice. I'll see what I can figure out.

Sorry about the piles onestep, that sounds really painful and grim - last thing you need. Hope they resolve soon.

Thinking of you barking x

Thanks ladies, if it's not one thing it's another, feel like my body has just about had enough of all this!!
Drs at 11:30am thank goodness!!

Thinking about you today patience and monten

Off out with the dog. bfn again this morning. Final result tomorrow.

Oh god, monten - i am so so sorry. What complete and utter shit. I really hoped you were on the home straight. Sending you love and strength. X

barking huge hugs, thinking of you xxx

Hi ladies, thanks for all your kind words. I had a terrible night’s sleep. Everything seems so bleak in the middle of the night, mind you doesn’t seem so much better now. Am at work, not sure if it’s a good idea but needed to get out of the house. Thinking of you patience. Hope it goes well as it possibly can. Have you had an erpc before? I really hate the thought of my body going through so many operations, it can’t be good for you. I was paranoid about the heaviness of my periods after last time, I’ve got all that joy to come again.

march and bootles and mrsb yes yes yes to anger about the time wasted pissing on sticks and putting my life on hold, all for it to end in nothing. And feeling sick and shitty. And putting on weight every first trimester. And the hoping and waiting, for it all to be dashed to nothing. And then starting over, again.

mrsc I had my first nuchal scan at 11 weeks 3 days, they didn’t seem to think that was an issue. I believe it’s any time from 11 – 13 weeks but I would ask to change it if you’re worried?

bootles the fact that conception seems a bit random is what is keeping me going. I can only hope the reason it took us so long this last time was that we had a string of bad luck/bad timing. I really really hope it wasn’t because my body is struggling.

barking I’m so very sorry about bfn. You’re being extremely brave. Walking the dog sounds like an excellent thing to be doing. I really hope it’s not insensitive of me to moan about how long it took us to get pregnant this last time. Well, it probably is quite insensitive of me, I’m sorry. I guess everyone is on their own personal journey though, aren’t they?

cloud you asked about tests. I’ve had all the standard RMC tests, including karyotyping for me and DH. Losses one and two were both chromosomal. I’m assuming this one is too, I will ask for products to be tested. Based on that I’m just not sure there’s much point doing any more investigations. I don’t fit Coventry’s hyper-fertile theory. It seems like it is just extremely bad luck. Or am I being naïve??

Great to hear you’re feeling positive twilight. Long may it continue. I hope this is your cycle .

I’m in two minds about the Facebook group! When this whole shit storm started I stopped using Facebook completely as I was so sick of being baby bombed and it’s improved my mental health no end. I’m worried if I go on it to join the group I’ll get sucked back into the rest. But I am nosy by nature and I would like to put faces to names….still thinking about it…

Monten and barking and patience - you're all v much in my head and heart today. Hugs.

Scan was fine, wriggler wouldn't sit still for measurements but seems to be growing ok. Nurse agreed the '12 week' scan is a bit early given my previous loss, but said better to go in Tuesday as booked then argue with them on the day about needing repeat/follow up in danger zone. I'm not sure if it might be sensible to phone the team who looked after that 13 week loss now to alert them in case they can book provisional second scan now? Don't want to nag or annoy them but I'm terrified of being left wondering. RMC clinic only do scans up to 12 weeks and don't do NT or anything so I'm approaching the end of their help. Sorry for being so self centred when so many of you are in worse places

Back from Drs have been referred to consultant for an operation. Now I face yet another dilemma, hold off until after ttc again or go ahead with op and face 3 weeks of recovery time. Unable to ttc right now because of this, more months wasted...

I posted this on the Facebook group earlier today...

www.facebook.com/StylistMagazine/posts/10154445801664572

Also posted that this RMC thread is the best thing that I've been part of for a very long time. The support is like no other!!!!!

Great news mrsc i wouldn't worry about bothering them. They can only say no at worst. And you won't need to see then for much longer

Sorry you've got to have an op onestep, but does sound like it needs sorting out. Maybe it would be good to get it out the way and then it's one less thing to be dealing with? Totally understand the frustration with waiting though. All we ever seem to do is wait.

monten, Sorry to hear you slept so badly. I don't think it's necessarily a bad idea to be in work if you think it helps. But if you need to go home then just do it. I would maybe see what the chromosome testing brings back this time before you make any decisions. The chances of three in a row completely by chance are less than 1%. It is absolutely possible but for me personally, i struggled to believe that it could be bad luck (and it turns out it wasn't). Coventry is not just about hyperfertility, it's also that the condition that causes high nk can lead to issues with the formation of the placenta, causing it to fail. You don't have to decide now anyway but it's something to think about. Big hugs in the meantime. We are here to chat whenever xx

Onestep, sorry you're uncomfortable (piles: yet another reason to doubt Intelligent Design....) hope you've got some cream to at least make you comfortable while you wait for further treatment? Literally a pain in the ass... on your behalf. x

mrsC glad scan was OK. A phone call enquiring about a scan can't hurt can it? esp if it puts your mind at rest.

onestep completely agree. This thread is a life saver!

Great news, MrsC, and no reason not to call the team, sounds sensible to me.

monten if you woke up in hospital with a leg amputated, you'd be entitled to moan about it, even if the person in the bed next to you had both legs amputated. I hope that makes sense! Everyone is on their own journey, and has their own perspective on it, your journey doesn't hurt any less just because someone else is hurting too.

Monten, I was at work in similar circumstances for mc 2&3 and found it really helped and meant work were more supportive when I was finally off after the eprc, however it's upto each individual person and their circumstances.

MrsC, glad to hear scan when well and wouldn't worry about bothering anyone x

Really sorry to hear another bfn today barking. What time is your blood test tomorrow?