Recurrent Miscarriage Support Thread 29 - Support for Tests, Treatments and Trying Again

[barkingtreefrog]

Support, hugs, a wealth of collective knowledge and lots of hand holding as we try again. This thread moves like lightning so prepare to read fast!

Previous thread here

Link to the RMC investigations information

Stats update:

allthereis: 29. DC, 4MC
anniehoo: 42. TTC#1 for 2.5yrs, 4MC
barkingtreefrog: 36. TTC#1 since Dec 11, 2MC
bettybutterchops: 40. DS, 3MC, pg
bootles: 41. DS, 1TFMR, 4MC, pg
brummiegirl: 38. TTC#1 since Apr 14, 3MC, pg
bubblybubbles80: 34. TTC#1, 3MC
bumblebee0: 29. DS, 2MC, pg
bunnymad: 40. DD, 2MC
bythesea82: 33. TTC#1 since Dec 12, 3MC, pg
casiopeia: . TTC#1, 3MC
chrystley: 41. DD, 5MC, pg
cloudjumper: 43. DS, 4MC, pg
confu3ed: 39. DS, DD, 5MC, pg
desperatelyhopeful: DS, 10 MC.
emerald72: 43. DS, 3MC
enlightenedbunny: 34. TTC#1 since '10, 1TFMR, 3MC, pg
erica21: 32. DS, 2MC, pg
extrablessings: 33. DS, 6MC
fackinell: 44. TTC#1, 4MC
fififolle: 37. DC, 2MC, pg
flen: 36. TTC#1, 3MC, pg
floweroct: 34. TTC#1 since 11, 3MC
frecklefire: 40. DS, 3MC
genwah85: 29. DS, 3MC, pg
girliesaints: 37. DD, 4MC (1 twins)
girlinoz: 32. TTC#1, 3 MC
Ifinishedthebiscuits: 37. 2DS, 4MC
iloveyoubaby: . DD, 2MC
inamaymaybewrong. 37. DS, 2MC
jady77: 37. TTC#1 since Sep 14, 2MC, pg
kazz2112: 31. TTC#1 since Feb 14, 3MC
lauren83: 31. TTC #1 for 7yrs, 2MC (1 twins)
leah1984: . TTC#1, 2MC
loopyaboutmy2boys: 38. 2DS, 6MC
lovemylittlebear: 29. 1 ectopic, 2MC, pg
marchgirl: 37. DD, 5MC, pg
maverick79: 35. TTC#1, 2MC, pg
me2me2: 2DC, 2MC
mimidoddrioni: 35. TTC#1, 2MC
minnie74: 40. DS, 3MC, pg
monten: 37. TTC#1 since Apr 13, 1TFMR, 1MC
morganlefey: 29. DD, 3MC
mrsb0710: 29. TTC#1, 2MC
mrsconfusion: 36. DD, 3MC, pg
mrsdiddlydoo: 34. DS, 2MC, pg
notspartacus: 39. 2DD, 2 ectopic , 3MC
onedaymaybe1: 32. TTC#1, 3MC
onestep2015: 39. TTC#1 since May 13, 3MC, 1 ectopic /PUL
patienceisvirtuous: 37. TTC#1 since Mar 14, 2MC, pg
peqpit: 33. TTC#1 for 2yrs, 3MC
portmoon: 43. DS, DD, 5MC
sallywade: 36. DS, 1TFMR, 5MC, pg
sashakerr: 37. DS, 3MC
sebsmummy: 40. DS, 3MC, pg
sizethree: 35, TTC#1, 3MC, pg
snoopysimaginaryfriend: 29. TTC#1 since Sep 14, 3MC
spamminit: 25. 2DS, 2MC
strubidooo: 34. TTC#1 since Sep 12, 3MC, 1 ect
sunandrainbow: 38, TTC#1, 4MC, pg
teach3: 27. TTC#1, 3MC
texta: 32. TTC#1, 3MC
thepopandcry: 38, DS, 4MC
thornfield38: 34. TTC#1 for 2 yrs, 2MC, pg
tomcat81: 34. TTC#1 since Oct 14, 2MC
twilightstruggle: TTC#1 since Nov 12, 5MC
wadsy: 36. DS, 1 ectopic , 4 MC, pg

ourdaywillcome
daisybell

Thread babies
bakingtins: 40. 2DS, 4MC. Faith born May 14
tannyloo: 42, 2DS, 5MC. Bertie born Mar 15
tinytear: 41. DD, 5MC. Alice born Mar 15
justonemoretime: 39. 3MC. Scott born May 15
purplefrogshoes: 38. 2MC, 1CMP. John born May 15
longestlurkerever: 34. DD, 3MC. Beth born Jun 15
catlover2014: 35. TTC#1 since 09, 3MC. Louis born Jun 15
boozle80: 34. 3MC. Mhairi born Jun 15
belleende: 40. TTC#1, 2MC, 1 TFMR. Cissy born Jun 15

Catching up from last thread after a week of no signal in darkest (but still sunnyish) Devon. Apologies for mega-post!

Hello home allmy , adamsmummy and kb I'm new here too but was also lurking for a while.

home I'm sorry to hear about the frustrating time you've had with the NHS, I've felt really let down at times too. We decided to wait for our results (just bloods so far, should have results back in the next few weeks) before TTC again, but I think it's a really personal decision. For me, all my miscarriages have been at such a similar time (5.5, 5, and 5.5 weeks) that I think there probably is something wrong and so far we have got pregnant quite quickly. I was very emotional though when I realised my results wouldn't be back in time to try this month and dh had to remind me of all the reasons we are waiting to TTC.

Congratulations kazz and oneday
Thank you for sharing that quote one day, really brought a lump to my throat.

biscuits that's a really hopeful thought about not taking things for granted, thank you for sharing that.

patience I'm so sorry to hear about your news and the rubbish quality of care.

girlie I think there are so many reminders of loss out there - for me recently it was The Help and it did take my breath away. Thinking about how much stigma there is about miscarriage though I am glad that some writers are acknowledging it and might open up some conversations. Having said that though sometimes it can be too painful to watch, especially when you're in the mood for something lighter.

Thanks barking and march for new thread and stats. brummie have pm'd you as I'd love to join the fb group if that's OK.

Great scan news sebs fifi march and Minnie

barking crossing my fingers for the blood results, as monten says every pregnancy is different

monten I am so sorry about your news and the wait. Catching up on a week's worth of news does really bring home the real extremes of emotions on this thread.

Monten fuck, I'm gutted for you. Can't believe it.

March and Minnie pleased for you both xx

Hah I'm a blondie!!! But I can assure you, Biscuits I wasn't always blonde. I did indeed resemble a bit Natalie Portman like.

I will post a pic on the fb page of what I should naturally look like. The blonde is expensive!!!!!!

Loopy and anyone else wanting fb - feel free to pm me Sasha or Bumble

I'm a blonde hottie. Still got it! Even though apparently I have a Birmingham twang and have lost my Home Counties dulcet tones.

Bugger

Mrsb, just to say that the latest research suggests that aspirin can cause more harm than good for people who don't have clotting issues. just has a link to the research on her blog. It's not in the Coventry protocol at all although i know mr shehata prescribes it. Total minefield knowing what to do.
As someone mentioned, for Coventry, the steroids are only until 12 weeks (with weaning from 10), so try not to think of the what ifs, you'll just drive yourself mad. They are also prescription-only drugs so unlikely you would be able to get them without one (apart from some dodgy places perhaps! )

Thank you march I think I just need to wait until I see GP and hopefully get bloods. I know I get ahead of myself. Just frustrated is all.

Montem barking and anyone else facing difficult times, I'm thinking of you all.

To all those with positive scans and BFP's, congrats and thinking of you all too. Xx

minnie & March excellent news .

Monten my heart just dropped when I read your news, I'm so, so sorry, this is so fucking unfair . I hope you've got lots of hugs around you . I wish I could come round and give you a big hug myself. Absolutely gutted for you.

On the aspirin issue I was put on dispersible aspirin from about 8 weeks and she has told me to continue for the forseeable. I'm also taking Fragmin alongside.

I was aware of the differing opinions out there but I decided to put my trust in the Consultant.

march - fab!

minnie so glad you and bumble are doing well for the Yorkshire contingent! x

monten I am so, so sorry. It is really shit news and really, really unfair. I do hope you are being looked after. Any chance they will scan you earlier so you don't have to wait?

barking I really hope you get clarification either way for Saturday. Thinking of you.

monten Oh sweetie, I am so so sorry that you have to go through this again. Nothing I can say will make it better, but you are in my thoughts.
Will you be having any tests or investigations?

barking Hope you are holding up!

Great scan news on here today as well, what a rollercoaster...

Aspirin - lots of mixed opinions on that one out there! I've tried all approaches - no aspirin, aspirin while ttc, aspirin from BFP - and I have had mcs with all approaches. I am, however, also taking it at the moment, since BFP.
But my history is different, I am on it due to my DVT, on advice of the obstetric haematologist, as well as fragmin. And for the mc due to chromosome anomalies, nothing would have made a difference - so my case it probably not a good example! While I probably wouldn't take it again while ttc, I think that there might be a benefit taking it from BFP - if there is a concern about clotting issues... It doesn't have the cyto-protective properties that heparin has, so not sure if it's any use for anything else than blood disorders. However, this is only my own, personal, scientifically unfounded opinion! Like so many things, too much isn't yet known, and probably never will be...

Thanks everyone. You're all so lovely.

minnie so glad for you too. Sorry I couldnt make it a hatrick but really pleased for you and march.

Thanks barking, I still have my fingers crossed for you. You're an amazing lady.

The scary thing is I know this is almost the easy bit. Life going back to normal is so hard and then ttc-ing again. It took us over a year this last time.

I'm so sad again about my dad tonight. He died five years ago and mostly I'm okay but I so wish he could come give me a hug right now. A white butterfly flew past me in the garden today. I've never seen butterfly in our garden before, does anyone believe in stuff like that? I know its a bit woo.

The next door neighbours kids were also singing 'I'm a survivor' by Beyoncé, less woo but quite funny, I did manage a wry smile.

monten I know what you mean about the 'easy' part. Going through ov tests,ttc, poas etc and then getting pregnant, and reaching milestones, and then the mc. Feels like I've lost a chunk of my life and I really really want it to be for something, and to have something at the end of it all.

Thinking of you, you know we're all here to support as much as we can.

Monten - I'm so sorry to hear your news. So very unfair and I hope you're being looked after. Very furious with miscarriage on your behalf. I think I'm with you on woo moments. Sort of believe them but don't at the same time. I'm fairly rational/scientifically minded mist of the time but sometimes you just get a woo feeling. And sometimes you need a woo feeling. Sorry to hear about your dad, though I appreciate it was a while ago.

Baking - so sorry for your BFN today. I really do have everything crossed for you that tomorrows test is different. Huge hugs.

Yay to March and Minnie for the good scans today. I hope you manage to eek the feelings of relief out over at least a few days!

Waves to everyone else. Sorry if I've missed major news recently. I've been lurking but haphazardly. Currently 3 dpo. Really enjoying my new job which is such a relief - feel like a different person (although that could be the fact that I'm 6 months post last-mc now and I find do start to recover around then only to promptly fall pg and mc again).

Can I join the fb group too please?!

Sebs have you seen I've added you to FB group?

Oh my word I can't keep up with you all! So many pages while I've been away. We survived camping and I dodged questions about not drinking by putting becks blue into a peroni bottle...

monten sending you the biggest squeezy hug. It is so utterly shit and unfair. Hope you can hunker down with tlc to get through the next week.

barking sending you hugs too, we're all here through tonight and tomorrow and Saturday - and thereafter. Really hope it's just too early. Is anyone with you today/tomorrow?

flen Minnie March fifi sebs so thrilled at the positive scan news, really well done you brave amazing women. Onwards day by day. flen I am furious at your consultant for the comments about anxiety - I'm an utter mess and haven't had any spotting since 4 weeks! He can jog on and keep his opinions to himself. Pah.

My next scan is tomorrow morning, following last week's cheeky extra private one (due to my total panic at morning sickness fading). Nausea is still less than I'm used to, although I have just needed emergency pretzels before bed which is something at least. My 12 week scan appt arrived - booked for 11+1! Seems rather too early?? Especially given my first loss at 13 weeks. So tomorrow I'm going to try to book another through the rmc clinic for 12+4 (just before holiday). I hope they listen.... surely it's a reasonable precaution?

Welcome newbies, so sorry you've had hard journeys. This is a lovely place and full of knowledge.

Waves to everyone else.

monten my mum once told me that she thought a blackbird in her garden (a regular visitor) was a friend or family member keeping an eye on things. Although we laughed at her I often catch myself double taking birds staring at me. We all need woo moments from time to time, and if your dad was here he'd definitely be giving you a monumentally huge hug xx

Good luck tomo morning mrsC love the drinking blue becks out of real beer bottles idea! Hope you enjoyed camping although I always get home feeling like I need a holiday after camping.

Monten I do... My grandmother died in Ireland when I was in my late teens. All the family went to the chapel of rest, which had the most wonderful stained glass windows in which were drenched in sunshine that afternoon, I know SUN in the West of Ireland what a rarity! but as we all sat in silence the most beautiful butterfly landed on my grandmothers coffin. Myself and my family have never forgotten that. It lingered there for ages. My husband recently walked over to me with the same type of butterfly in a glass that had got trapped in our conservatory and I could not help bursting in to tears!! Xxx

Good luck tomorrow zMrsC

Onestep love the butterfly story, definitely think there's something in it.

I can't keep up with here and fb!! I'm doing little anything else and keep going bed at midnight!! Lol x

good luck with any scans today.

monten I know what you mean, I always found dealing with a loss at the time was almost manageable and the easy part its the aftermath. it's the disappointment/fear and damn right starting all over a again that was the hardest. you will get there lovely, its just shit. I'm so sorry words fail at tines like this. loving the butterfly stories I definitely believe there's something it in.

barking thinking of you, Hoping today or tomorrow brings you better news x

Monten I am pretty woo by nature so yes I do believe in signs from passed loved ones. I've been very fortunate not to have lost anyone very close to me (yet) but I'm sure when I do I shall be finding comfort in messages that other people wouldn't notice. I was always told a white feather can signify a message from a loved one and I've certainly found them at times when life has seemed very bleak. I'm sure you've had a shocking night sleep so hand holding xx

Good luck with those who have scans today. I've found the secret group now and can't believe how young you all look!!! Can I have the low down on your beauty regimes please

Good luck today mrsc. 11+1 sounds a bit early of you want the nt measurement doesn't it?

Keeping fingers crossed for this morning barking xx

I wish your dad was here to give you a big hug too monten. Iknow ours not the same, but you have lots of virtual ones on here xx.
I have to agree that i look for little signs like that (even though I'm very much a scientist and shouldn't believe in that kind of stuff). Love the butterfly stories.

I found one of my angry feelings after mc, or the later ones at least (and particularly the one where i was very sick), was what a waste of time that all was, to go through all that, and then have to start again from scratch feels incredibly unfair. I really hope they are able to book you in swiftly so you can start to heal. I'm honestly gutted for you after all the time you went through to get here.

Thinking of you today patience x

monten the Greeks believed that butterflies were souls, and the Greek word for butterfly "psyche" is the same as soul. xxx

mrsc your angry support made me smile, thank you! I admit I've been hauling myself over the coals about being "too anxious" which is just RIDICULOUS. Silly consultant.

patience thinking of you today.

Thanks March. Just want it over and done with now.

Monten, I feel exactly the same re the aftermath being most difficult. Being back at square one is as crap as it gets x

Hope it goes smoothly today, Patience.

Any takers for prof Regan's miscarriage book? Pm me and its yours.