Recurrent Miscarriage Support Thread 26 - tests, treatment and trying again

[bythesea82]

Tea, hugs, a wealth of collective knowledge and lots of hand holding as we try again. This thread moves like lightning so hold on to your hats!
Previous thread here

That's a good point, I had no problems with dd with my first husband, but 3mc with DH whose mum also suffered from mc. Coincidence?

Ooh - I'd be up for a Bucks meet up too. Not too far for me from oxford way.

chryst - so sorry you find yourself here, but welcome. I'm 38 and have had 4mc (plus a very early chemical that I try and ignore) and am now pg for a 5th time. I did ask about ivf with pre genetic testing of the embryo. It is seriously expensive - normal ivf cost plus a few £000 on top! I was told that because I get pg easily, just to keep going, but if I had another mc to get genetic testing done again and they would review the advice depending on the outcome (only one of my previous mcs has been tested and was trisomy 22).

sebs - completely understand the self preservation instinct lovely. I'm completely in denial with this pg despite most recent scans being positive. However, I am also hopeful for you and keeping everything crossed.

cat - sorry to hear that the bf is so tough. I have no advice, but just wanted to send hugs.

x

Thank you for making me feel welcome.

The NK cells sounds interesting. ... is Coventry the only place for this testing? We live on South coast so Coventry is a long way ... but obviously I'm keen to pursue any avenue if I can convince DH it's a good option to pursue and I will mention it to the gynae doctor next Monday.

We have this meeting with a private gynae doctor on 29th to discuss other options and I'm waiting for genetic testing on the NHS (they told me this could take up to 3 months as it went off to London) ... 3 months We are 'active' but not actively TTC as we've not had a cycle since the last MC.

I've got to investigate /google what ICIS is compared to IVF ... does anyone know?

There are (at least) 2 doctors in London who test blood NK cells ( Drs Shehata and Gorgy) but AFAIK the uterine biopsy is only done in Coventry and someone had it in Thornbury (?) but I think that's oop North too. I travelled from Bristol to visit Coventry, you only have to go once, consult and biopsy all done in the same visit then they do a telephone consult with results and liase with phone or email from then on. If you want more info on the London doctors there is another thread on the conception board called some variation of 'the pred thread' where there are lots of patients. It tends to be £££ and they use more complicated treatments involving multiple visits.

Thank you Bakingtins x

Sunandrainbow thank you ... I think that's what I expect to be told to keep going and it will happen ... we'll see what the genetic tests come back with. I'm not sure I'll abstain from TTC until the results come through though.

That's the other thing .... last MC was June 6th .... I want to start now TTC but not sure if too early as no monthly cycle happened yet. Is there such a thing as too early?

I think I am going to ask about DH being tested as NO tests done on him at all. I think the NHS doctor said you conceived and carried DD so no reason apart from age hindering you.

Lots of us with diagnosed problems had children before having issues, it doesn't mean there is nothing wrong except dodgy eggs.
I was interrupted by dinner, but wanted to suggest IVF/ICSI is not going to help unless you also have Pre-implantation genetic testing which is £££££, and would normally only be suggested if you or DH have a genetic condition you are passing on (rather than spontaneously arising chromosome problems which are random but increase with age) IVF success rates per v expensive cycle are pretty low, it doesn't make sense to do this if you can get pregnant naturally.
Obviously entirely up to you when you TTC again, but bear in mind that for Coventry testing you have to be 2 cycles post MC and not pregnant, so if you unfortunately had another MC that 'resets the clock' in that respect. Of course it could all be hunky dory next time.... I personally did not believe I was just old/unlucky and it didn't seem sensible to keep trying without changing something to at least swing the balance in my favour. With NK cells of 16% I was told it was very unlikely I'd keep a pregnancy, chances with treatment were given at 60-70%.

I think you're right Bakingtins .... I don't seem to have trouble conceiving. I'll talk to DH tonight re Coventry and NK cells.

I don't suppose you know if there is a waiting list / waiting time?

The only thing we might have Is the translocational gene thing and DD might have been the miracle. Fingers crossed the genetic test of the passed material doesn't take too long. I'm not sure when to start chasing that.

I think the genetic testing of the embryo is normally 6 to 8 weeks ish from memory. I do hope you get some results back from that (just to warn you - they can't always culture the cells so there is a small possibility you wouldn't get a result. We didn't). I think it's only about 5% of those tested that find an issue, so whilst it's good to get it ticked off the list, it's less likely to be this than some of the other causes.

I agree that if you're thinking of Coventry you might be best to do it now. frustrating as it is to wait, it would be less frustrating than losing another one and then having to wait 2 months after that when you decide coventry's the next thing to try (I speak from unfortunate experience!, although obv I hope you never have to go through that).

Yay Sun didn't realise you lived that close! A Just Thorne Onestep Sun and me meet up sounds ace. And I would love to meet Scott as well Just

Have a think about when works and we can sort

Hope the Yorkshire ladies had a fab day

Another shit afternoon. 3 yr old birthday party. Everyone there had no 2 on a hip or toddling around. All apart from my 'at-least-I'm-not-the-very-last-one-to-have-a-2nd-baby' friend. Who is now pregnant. I'm delighted for her as they've had fertility issues, but it hurts. An afternoon filled with either the "do you have any other children" question or the pitying "how are you?" question. Torture.

No waiting list. You need to have 2 AF's post MC then track ovulation. You phone when you ovulate and they fit you in 7-10 days later, clinics on Monday or Friday afternoons so there's normally only one that fits that window. I've not heard of anyone not being able to get an appointment, they endeavour to squeeze you in to fit that timing. If you have v predictable cycles they let you book ahead - I booked from the beginning of my cycle, not ovulation, because I had to book a day off work that was an embarrassing conversation with my boss

Ouch march that must have been rubbish.

March

One of these days the answer to that question will be "fucking shit actually, how the devil are you?"

March, same here today. Had Dd's best friend over today, plus his mother and 8 month brother. Only spoken to the kid's mother a few times at birthday parties but she's the really nosey type and after asking what I do, how much I earn (I kid you not) she then asked didn't I want more kids. Knew she would so I told her about the mcs. She then proceed to ask me all about them until it was time for them to go home. Lots of ???????????????????????????? tonight for us!

Girlie

FFS

indeed

Sebs, IFinished - I'm in Cambs, too

What's the name of the place in Coventry to contact?

Thanks in advance x

Omg girlie** she sounds like a frigin' nightmare!!! "private car crash people, nothing to see here!" ffs!!!

Well, had the most lovely afternoon with yorkshire contingent! It was lovely to be with others who really understand what's gone on and is going on in my life. Was lovely to put a face to a name. Would be very happy also to travel further to see others! E x

How is everyone getting on. Girlie and March it sounds like you've had tough afternoons. I always used to have a mix of emotions in those situations - jealousy of the people with 2 DC, seeing them play together etc and getting frustrated whilst tactfully trying to fend off questions about when we would have another DC. I get it quite a bit in work too, the last time I was asked I replied 'we're just having a bit of trouble getting one to stick at the moment'. Perhaps TMI but it soon changed the conversation.
I've certainly found that being open about it really helps, so many people have been through similar things. girlie I can't believe she asked you how much you earn- were you not tempted to go for a bit of a wind up?!
I had a bit of a panic when I got my BFP as the consultant (who'd advised more meds from BFP) was on annual leave and I couldn't get an appt with my GP for a week. Anyway, the consultant phoned me, was lovely and did me a private prescription to take to my GP appt. The GP was great too (he's got 2 DCs through IVF) and did me an NHS script.
I'm now on 5mg folic acid and 400mg cyclogest each day. Is anyone else on the same?
I'm in Cheshire, if there's anyone near here, it would be great to meet up.

A few glasses of ????in the hot tub yesterday definitely helped me to unwind! No I didn't tell her how much I earn but did tell her about the mcs as it felt right to. Also know she's a gossip so it will get round the rest of the nursery mums so hopefully no further questions!

Wine in the hot tub sounds fab! Just what you needed after a stressful afternoon. It would be sad for her to gossip with the other mums about it, I'm sure plenty of them will have also had MCs/difficult pregnancies/fertility treatments. Here's to a much more relaxing Sunday.

What a nosey cow about the salary question! Possibly a bit nosey to ask about the mc but I'd actually much rather people asked me about it than ignored it, and if it helps a few more people understand then I can't say it's a bad thing. I hope she'll be discreet with the information.

Glad you had some wine and a hot tub. That sounds nice. I was lying in bed awake from 845 as dh was tired after going to the pub while I went to the horrible kids party (!) Should have just sat up myself with a glass of vino as he just feel asleep!

Hot tub was a recent treat for dh after looking after me after last MC (it's a lazy spa so much cheaper than permanent one) it's my new favourite thing to relax and de stress in! ????