Recurrent Miscarriage Support Thread 20 - tests, treatment, trying again.

[barkingtreefrog]

Buckle up, the threads move like lightening! Tea, sympathy, information, support and combined wisdom to guide you through the maze of testing and treatment for recurrent miscarriage. Newbies always most welcome.

Please start with the traditional recap of your stats.

twilight good to hear from you, been wondering how you are. Sorry you're feeling low at the moment, but it's only natural. Hope getting closer to coventry will help you look Forward more positively.

bunny great news about your scan. Hoping this time will be your time. X

brummie glad you enjoyed your afternoon.

barking good luck for tomorrow, will be thinking of you.

baking glad to hear Faith has been seizure free for a while now. Hope it stays this way and the steroid weaning is successful.

Longest & Brummie, sounds like you've had a delightful afternoons x

Twilight , big hugs and sending news to AF to gets itself to you pronto

I'm currently hiding upstairs as I should be packing for a week away my DD, DH and my parents at Butlins (cheap break) Seem like good idea when we booked it.....

Which one are you going to girlie? I have been to quite a few music festivals at the minehead one but skeggy is near where my grandma lived. Have fun!

Slightly less delightful evening. Dh is not well and also cross about the football and dd is overtired and whiny. As soon as I can prise myself off the sofa she is going to bed though and I can have my imaginary

We're going to Minehead, taking the last opportunity to go in term time before dd starts school in September x

Hello! Can I join, too? Am 24 hours past a d&c for my baby who lost heartbeat at 9+1, measuring ahead at the scan but just without heartbeat.... I have also a few blighted ovum losses and a series of chemicals, but I almost got used to them and stopped counting how many I have had. All this has happened since I turned 40, and after my last living kid was born (I have 4, last three are boys, my doctors too flount the idea that my problem is immune system kicking in after a number of male pregnancies).

I have been tested for everything on earth, all neg, but still on progesterone, aspirin and prednisolone if pregnant. The last pg which progressed further was achieved while experimenting with soy isoflavones. Maybe they helped, or maybe my immune response is just weakening (My first mcs showed beta drops in 12-14 DPO, then several in 20-21, then some went to blighted ovums, then one developed a fetal pole and the last one even started to look like a real baby on US). Anyway, am looking around MN to find people in my own situation to suffer through this repeated 12ww together..... Obviously I have to get my cycle back first, but I hope to retry in May-June.

Hello jass. Welcome and sorry for your losses. You have come to the right place. You mention doctors. Have you been referred to the rmc and will they do genetic testing on the foetus? Those would be the first steps but you will hear a lot of talk about the implantation clinic at Coventry which might be s good next step for you if you have had the standard tests.

girlie we're in the same boat. Can't believe my baby has grown up so fast! We find out which school she'll be going to in a few weeks.

brummie glad you had a fab afternoon. Woohoo for prosecco!

longest your afternoon sounds lovely. The weather has been great.

twilight so sorry you feel so down. I hope Coventry may give you some answers. Not knowing is a shit place to be.

bunny so happy for your scan news.

barking keeping everything crossed for you for tomorrow. ?

girlie enjoy your break. I hate working in a school and being stuck to going in the hols!

Feeling nervous and sad again tonight. Tomorrow is my first day back at work. Dreading it and the inevitable unthinking comments from some people (one older lady has constantly reminded me that 'an only child is a lonely child' since ds was about a year old!) And I worry what to say if the kids ask where I've been- which some are bound to!
pop good luck on your first day too (if I've got that right!)

jass sorry x post. Welcome and so sorry you have to be here. Hopefully you'll get the support you need from the lovely ladies on here.

Bunny glad scan went well

Jass sorry you find yourself here, but welcome.

Twilight

Good luck for tomorrow Minnie. I hope it goes really well. Is it 1 week then easter hols?

Thanks for welcome! Lurker, I am not in UK, but I have a doctor in my country who works with Prof. Quenby, so I have immunes tested.
And all other things, too, at a university hospital were they do a lot of rmc research. I oscillate between the country I work and the one I come from, and as I had the eprc in Luxembourg, they would not even test the fetus. My doc in home country suggested I fly over for eprc and they would test it, but since I was basically crying from the minute I knew to the time of eprc I just could not undertake the flights to get home.

Good news on the scan bunny

Welcome jass, hope you find some support here.

Good luck for the first day back minnie. I hope it's not as bad as you fear. I'd be tempted to be honest and shame the older colleague for being so thoughtless if she says something like that. I generally think saying what happened is the best policy, as the stigma needs to be broken, but i know it's easier said than done with kids. Just do whatever you can cope with. Hand holding x

Thinking of you tomorrow barking. We'll all be there with you, cheering those eggs on.

Yes minnie, me too so good luck and I'll be thinking of you. Am dreading it but know this feeling will disappear once I'm there. I was told by my new therapist to just say 'It's been tough but we're getting through it,' in order to close down any intrusive questions and to be able to keep my protective barrier up (this sounds strange, I know, but everything's so recent and heartbreaking at the moment I just don't want to share what's happened with people as it's like an intrusion into something that's so personal. It's not a shame thing, just a 'it was my loss, it's private, back off' kind of thing. Does that make sense?) And then head down 'til the hols next Friday!

Good luck Barking & Minnie tomorrow x

Longest, can't believe we'll know the schools soon. Finger crossed we get first choice

AF has finally turned up this evening. Only 4 days late and will mean that I won't be able to go swimming for first few days. Bit annoying but at least it's here

Waves at everyone else x

pop that's a useful thing to say. I'm going to use that too if you don't mind, especially for those people who like to pry! I need that barrier too or I'll end up crying every time someone new asks about it. I thought I might just say something very sad happened if any of the kids ask. I've got two weeks to go unfortunately- break up on the day before Good Friday. I have Wednesdays off though so really it's not long at all.

Go for it minnie. I found it a really useful way of looking at the situation and how it feel at the moment. It's taken away a bit if the fear I had about seeing everybody. And, like you said, it would just be too overwhelming to have to go through it all with everybody. Sorry you've got longer to go. But you'll get your revenge on me when it comes to the other side of the holiday .

minnie, pop I'm back to work tomorrow too after ectopic. I've been panicking about what to say - I lead a big team so need to be the strong boss, and also don't want them all speculating about when/if I'll get pregnant again. But I don't want to lie. In the summer my boss implied it was nasty gastric flu when I was off for erpc, but this time they know I was in hospital and had surgery. I'm sure some people might guess but really don't want to fall apart, I need to keep my protective layers intact.
Last time I had a friend nearby who knew so I could disappear out to see her if needed (luckily I work am office job and can fake a meeting if needed). I'm a bit worried that it hasn't really hit me yet as I've been focussed on physical recovery from surgery, so just hope I don't crash in the office! Who knew the real world could be so scary. It's safe on my sofa.

monten the blossoming tree image is firmly in my head now, how beautiful. I lit a candle on mc1 edd, but still have a really strong need to do something more permanent. Having never liked tattoos, at the moment I just keep wanting to get a secret cluster of stars somewhere hidden, one per mc. Totally out of character but it's such a strong urge.

to all with tough weeks ahead, and to those who can .

MrsC, good luck for tomorrow. I was in a similar situation after my last MC. I found in the end I was honest with them if they asked and continue to be honest now regarding test results and signing upto the Response trial. It has meant that generally my team have become more loyal and happy to pick up meetings for me if I've had to dash off at short notice. Its a personal choice, but it's worked for me so far x

hello lovely, sorry you are here, but glad that you have found us!

Marking my place, will update my stats tomorrow!

Good luck tomorrow Barking MrsC and Minnie thinking of you all!! xx

Morning everyone! Hope it goes well today barking, Minnie and MrsC, thinking of you.

Thank you jady for the charts, that is helpful. Temp rise this morning, which is a relief. I am really struggling with cycles being out of whack, it's so unsettling. Guess it's yet another way that I feel out of control and helpless...

monten the tree image was beautiful for me too. I so hope for blossoming for you. xx

We saw a house we liked on Friday and are going for a second viewing this week. Scary but exciting...

Morning ladies - shit, I really need some advice pls. Am on cd28 today and have got a very feint line on clearblue plus, followed up by a "pregnant" on the digital. My cycle is usually 26 days and on Saturday I had pink mucus once when I wiped (and assumed af was on way). Other than a positive test I have no symptoms. This is exactly like mc2 - pink mucus, no symptoms and blighted ovum, whereas my other two mc (where a fetus grew) I had stuffy nose, sore boobs, indigestion from cd23 and absolutely knew I was pg before I did the test. In each pg I have felt when things went wrong - on the second one from the start and the other two at 6 / 7 weeks. In the chemical pg I had although it showed a very very feint line on the cb plus, I never did get a positive on the digital but it was all over in a few days.

So the question now is, do I start the progesterone, steroids etc if this pg already feels wrong? I never thought I'd write this but I'm almost hoping its a chemical pg and will sort itself out in the next few days rather than another blighted ovum, scans, erpc etc. I am assuming if I take progesterone that this would prevent me from bleeding if it was a chemical???

God am so confused what to do now. Added to which am off to China for a two week holiday at the end of next week and now shitting myself at the thought of miscarrying so far from home.

Would really really appreciate any advice you have pls. Thank you.

Just popping in to say
barking good luck today
For those back to work, I hope it's ok as can be.
jass sorry you find yourself here but welcome.
[waves] to everyone else, back later & will add stats

And barking - sorry meant to add that am keeping everything crossed for you today hun. x

sun so difficult. I think you have got a few days where you can continue testing for a positive and see if it changes - when I got the faint line last month, it was gone by the following day. But to be honest, if I was in your position, I think I would probably be calling my EPU for advice...

Sun, sorry you're up in the air. I'd take the progesterone and seen advice from you EPU. My pg this time started with spotting. It could be that the progesterone makes all the difference. x
Barking, good luck today.
Wishing those returning to work today good luck with it, one day at a time.