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Miscarriage/pregnancy loss

Find support and share your experiences on our Miscarriage forum. See also legal rights and support after baby loss.

Original poster

Recurrent Miscarriage Support Thread 19 - tests, treatment, trying again.

995 replies

bythesea82 · 06/03/2015 12:07

Buckle up, the threads move like lightening! Tea, sympathy, information, support and combined wisdom to guide you through the maze of testing and treatment for recurrent miscarriage. Newbies always most welcome.

Please start with the traditional recap of your stats.

OP posts:
Brummiegirl15 · 09/03/2015 17:13

All I know is that in my email from Cov, Kerri said you are not able to attend if you've had a failed IVF, miscarriage or ERPC in the last 2 months. It then says, if you have had this within 2 months you need to wait for 2 cycles.

So I didn't really understand the criteria between two months or two cycles. Two months in the email was underlined!!!

It's probably worth emailing her to ask

maverick79 · 09/03/2015 17:25

Hi,
My stats: me, 35. Dh 32. No dc. mc 1: July 14, natural. Mc 2: Feb 15, natural. Got the scan before it really started to see it was twins. Am pushing for tests etc using age to encourage NHS.

Can't remember names but just wanted to acknowledge mothers day is also bothering me, I should have just had my first or be pregnant with my second.

Also, weight loss, I have decided this time I will not put on another stone and a half so am using this recent m/c to kick start weight loss, 3lbs off already!

Tanny huge congratulations and thank you for maintaining our hope that we will follow you down that road eventually too.

twilight I am a rabbit owner too, three house rabbits. I am really sorry for your loss xx

tannyLoo · 09/03/2015 17:52

Brummie that sounds great and really helpful. Sounds like you will have a hope-filled week!

sebsmummy1 · 09/03/2015 18:07

Brummie that sounds like such a positive consultation and a relief that all the tests came back normal. Have you received the results from the pregnancy tissue yet?

I have no idea when I will hear something from my RCM clinic. They talked about six weeks but will I just get an appointment through the post or did any if you have to chivvy them along with phone calls? I've got not energy left in me to fight the NHS so I'm hoping they will organise everything.

Brummiegirl15 · 09/03/2015 18:10

I suppose I feel a bit Hmm as essentially Mr Watts said I'm just going to have to try again but hopefully these things would prepare me.

And the thought of "just trying again" really frightens me.

But we want a family so we just have to keep going.

Our end goal is a gorgeous little munchkin of our own. Hopefully this will all work. But I'm not sure I could attempt to go through it a 2nd time

I wanted 3 originally as I'm 1 of 3

Then it became 2 because I felt children should have siblings and felt I was too old for having 3.

Now I would just be eternally grateful for 1

Brummiegirl15 · 09/03/2015 18:12

Sebs they didn't test the tissue for number 3. Birmingham Women's did for number 2 and it was genetically clear. I asked today about karyotyping and was told as number 2 was clear it probably wasn't necessary.

For all my appointments everything has come through the post fairly promptly

Marchgirl · 09/03/2015 18:29

That sounds really positive brummie. Glad he sounds so in tune with Coventry and that you won't have a fight on your hands.
I totally understand the fear that comes with a 'normal' diagnosis. Never thought I'd be upset for someone to tell me I was normal but i just wanted there to be a reason that they could treat. It's a strange feeling isn't it? But you have a credible treatment plan and there is Coventry to make sure you've covered all bases. Feeling very hopeful for you Smile

sebs, i would probably chase it up if i were you, as in most cases the appointment letter seems to come through relatively quickly then it's bloody ages until the actual appt. I know there were a few of the women on here who had their referrals 'lost' in the system

ThePopAndCry · 09/03/2015 18:58

Thanks brummie!

Sunandrainbow · 09/03/2015 19:01

brummie - really pleased that your appointment went well and he was open and receptive to other ideas - coventry etc. It makes such a difference doesn't it when you feel that you are actually being listened to. Did he have any thoughts on what's going on with af?

twilight - sorry to hear about your rabbit. Pets are part of the family and it is so painful to lose them.

I'm another who would love a dog but I live stupidly far from work - takes me about 1 hr 45 each way although I manage to work from home at least one day a week. Have a little fantasy that I will have a baby, jack in work and get a dog. Wonder if any of those will ever happen!

Sunandrainbow · 09/03/2015 19:03

brummie - I am also rapidly revising down the number of dc I 'want'. Started at 3, am down to desperately hoping for 1. x

TinyTear · 09/03/2015 19:04

Brummie, that sound like you got a good one!!

Flower29 · 09/03/2015 19:11

Sounds like a lovely bloke and s great meeting brummie! Smile

barkingtreefrog · 09/03/2015 19:22

Sounds like a positive experience brummie Grin

I'm all go! Start injections tomorrow morning. I was a bit concerned when I explained that I'd had two days of spotting but no proper flow (could have easily caught the lot in a teaspoon) so I might not be ready and the nurse did the scan and said my womb lining was thin enough... Hmm. The progesterone will help my lining though, won't it? And they'll know from the later scans whether my womb lining is thick enough. must not find more things to stress about

barkingtreefrog · 09/03/2015 19:24

Cross post sun, was distracted by the TV!
I too now just desperately want one. And if that doesn't happen I think I'll be at the rescue centre looking for a second dog..... Hmm

Brummiegirl15 · 09/03/2015 19:24

Mr Watts was lovely and it was a proper 3 way chat between him, me and DP. Plus he introduced himself as John!!!! Very un-consultant like

He didn't sit behind his desk and talk at me like some consultants have in past.

Unfortunately he is not far off retirement and as my sis says "it will be a sad day for the women of Worcestershire when Mr Watts retires"

Marchgirl · 09/03/2015 19:35

Sounds like a great guy brummie. Hopefully he's got some young protégés following in his footsteps.
That's great news barking! I'm sure the lining is ok. They wouldn't go ahead otherwise. All the hormones they are going to give you will do their job. Very exciting!

Brummiegirl15 · 09/03/2015 19:36

Great news Barking good you are a goer. Keeping everything crossed for you!!!!

Loopyaboutmy2boys · 09/03/2015 19:47

Brummie that all sounds really good. Monica offered me the 20th too earlier, but she's going to see what date they can offer if I opt for local anaesthetic instead. With 2 young children to look after, I think a local is better for our situation, as if it is a general I imagine it to be same process as the ERPC, starving beforehand, arriving at the hospital extremely early morning well before their nursery opens, and not being able to drive or be left on my own for 24 hours, which is all a big pain for DH, so whilst I think I'd prefer to be unaware of what they do, the local is less inconvenient to our family. Did mr Watts say if they fix things there and then if they see any issues when they do the hysteroscopy? How long do we have before he retires?

Flower29 · 09/03/2015 20:06

Great news barking!! Smile

Frecklefire · 09/03/2015 20:08

Went back to work today and discovered that a really close friend has utterly betrayed me. Feel like i've been punched in the face. Havn't cried for my three miscarriges but sobbed all the way home in the car. Feel so bleak. Am totally out of my depth at work, feel my marriage is more of a house-share situation. Don't know of it's chemical or actual, but havn't felt as low in years. If i didn't have my beautiful ds i would just quit work and marriage and just go back home. I pride myself on being a really great friend, i am dumbfounded that this person would stab me in the back like this, way to kick a dog when its down!

Brummiegirl15 · 09/03/2015 20:29

Oh Freckle my love. Massive hugs xx

Deep breath. And yes you do find out who is really a friend at times like this.

I'm feeling out of my depth too and completely overwhelmed. We are all here for you xx

Sunandrainbow · 09/03/2015 20:35

Oh freckle - am so sorry you are feeling so low. How shitty of your supposed 'friend'. As brummie says - sadly at times like these you do find out who your friends are. Is there anywhere you can go for a bit of time out with ds? Family or other friends who could offer you some support?? Big hugs hun. x

barkingtreefrog · 09/03/2015 20:42

freckle is this a friend at work, is this work related, or did you just find out while you were at work?

So sorry you've been side swiped. It's so difficult to know how much the rational you is upset and how much it's hormones. I spent all weekend crying and today (now I'm in AF cramp agony and I've started bleeding properly this afternoon) I feel completely fine about everything I was upset about over the weekend.

Thanks. Hope everything feels more manageable soon. Where is 'home'? Can you go for a weekend if it's where you're going to feel most secure?

Flower29 · 09/03/2015 21:16

freckle sorry your so called friend is shit and you're having problems with hubby. Are you having any counselling? I just might help you think through and process things more clearly. Just remember we're all here for you and please rant and offload whenever you need to. Also, could you take some sick leave for a bit to concentrate on yourself? I hope you get some time to look after yourself and grieve for your lost babies. Thinking of you Flowers x

girliesaints · 09/03/2015 21:16

Big hugs Freckle. Sometimes the world is a shitty place and there's not a lot you can do about it except accept it will get better.

Hope you have another friend at work you can turn to for support. In terms of DH, I can honestly say at times I could throttle him and walk out, but often when I look back its the hormones/ emotions that cause the issues (although he is sat watching footy at the moment- ggrh!)

You know as ever we are here for you. Perhaps ??or?? to help?