Recurrent Miscarriage Support Thread 18 - tests, treatment, trying again.

[bakingtins]

Buckle up, the threads move like lightening! Tea, sympathy, information, support and combined wisdom to guide you through the maze of testing and treatment for recurrent miscarriage. Newbies always most welcome.

Please start with the traditional recap of your stats.

tanny, sebs and brummie, glad its not just me then - I definitely feel a sense of exasperation coming from people, and a feeling that they are thinking its obviously never going to work so why do I keep getting pg...grrr

twilight jady and brummie you have DP's who CLEAN?! brummie am loving the sound of yours! My DP is always saying 'what mess'? Drives me crazy....

V helpful breakdown of tests baking

Also amazed at all your cleaning boff dps. We have the worst combination of both being crap around the house

ourday definitely go for back passage with the cyclogest, it's much less messy and stays in better!

Thanks all for your messages, I'm tired but ok. Not eaten all day so getting a Chinese now. X

Hah Bootles when I say "what mess" DP looks outraged and says "what do you mean what mess??! How can you not see it?"

Gets him outraged every time

Cat sooo glad mini Cat Kitten is ok. Defo a reason to sit on sofa and crack open some mini eggs

Sebs we are doing parallel with Coventry purely because of timing, so yes we are still seeing NHS consultant.

We always said if we got nowhere with consultant we'd try Coventry but now our date changes means we are tipped into another month it took Just to point out the obvious and we thought sod it. Do both!

The irony is I'm now desperate for AF to get here so I can ovulate and get my appointment. You literally couldn't make it up

Are you allowed to TTC whilst they are doing tests? I an trying to talk myself into giving up trying but I know that directly I show signs of getting my cycles back I'm going to be itching to get going again

Seb I think they tend to say best not to try during tests but I know plenty on here who have. I guess it's just a case of risking if you would be able to get treatment quick enough if there is an issue found and you've got a BFP.

Thanks Brummie just ordered a Chinese take away to have before my mini eggs haha. In the nicest possible way I hope your AF comes soon too so you can get started at Coventry XxX

Sebs, some tests are ok, some you need to not be pg. Esp. at Coventry as they do a uterine biopsy so you def can't be pg. All will recommend you wait in case there is a treatment you need to start before on upon bfp.

And now I want mini eggs. Really badly. And DP is at work and dd asleep so I can't go and get any - would it be wrong to wake her up in order to go to the shop...

Thank you. Ive just had the kindest offer from my fertility acupuncturist. She is so upset for me that this is hspprned, and knew we couldn't afford for me to continue to see her weekly for the forseeable that she has cut her fee in half. I'm so grateful to her as the mixture of acupuncture and copious supplements saw my stupidly short cycles go to 28 days in a few months. In a sea of darkness she has just given me a chink of light.

Aw. Bless her for doing that. Glad that you have had something good happen today

Meant to say, Cat, so glad you and Kitten, ok.

cat pleased to hear all is well.

sebs what a lovely acupuncturist. Back to your previous post, having no answers is very very hard. I lost my last one at 9 weeks, and it looked good a few days before. There's a long conversation about 9 wk plus losses, on previous thread - don't know if you've seen it. Those early days are awful when you first wake up and know all over again that its happened. Hugs. Gosh must sleep...

Yep it sure is. I've just woken up, 4am and the first thought of course is 'the baby died'. Fucking hell its torture in my head.

Hugs to you sebs, that sinking feeling in the middle of the night is so awful. Hope you managed to get some sleep afterwards.

My friend had her baby girl at 30 weeks last night, waters broke early. Both are doing very well but it's scary stuff. Why can't it just be easier than this? X

So awful sebs. I am glad your acupuncturist was kind. It makes such a difference when someone shows some understanding. I hope the procedure on Tuesday is the beginning of the healing process But of ccourse it will take time.

Hope af arrives soon brummie

Fx for your friend cat. I think at 30 weeks the prognosis will be good but all that hospital treatment will be so stressful for them.

Hugs sebs, so horrible when that happens.

Groan - got pissed last night and had a teeny argument with people on aibu and am now feeling like a tit.

The first thing DH said to me this morning was "you won't ever kill yourself will you". He said he'd been worrying about it in the night. Not sure where it came from but it made me sad.

Sorry you had a rough night Sebs. X

Wow, I'm away for a couple of days and there's a new thread and nearly 100 new posts...
Just popping in with my stats and will have a catch up...
Me 29 DH 32
DS aug13 straight forward, naive pregnancy
Mc1 sep14 - MMC just under 12wks but baby died 8+5. Medical mgmt
Mc2 jan15 - MMC? Spotting at 6 wks, scan showed sac at 4.5wks, went on to mc naturally at 7-8 wks.

Now on first af post mc. Going to have a break from ttc for a couple of months. Having counselling, not had any testing done as its 'only' the second mc. Don't seem to have any problems getting pg so I do wonder if the hyper fertility theory fits with me. I have also bled a lot with each mc so am wondering if the thick lining fits with this...

I had been thinking of my september baby when i would go to sleep, nice thoughts - happy place type of thing, and last night i thought "what can i think of now?" Even thinking of getting pregnant/being pregnant after 3 consecutive mc is just laced with fear. Im pretty sure i would get pregnant again quite fast, if i didnt take precautions, but the same outcome just seems so - inevitable. Had a shitty 24 hours. Massive flood of blood in m&s yesterday and have just been feeling so full of rage and sadness - i'm sure partly its the horemones dropping. Friend who had chem preg ladt year then mc at 5 weeks a few weeks ago just seems to be getting much better care than me at my hospital. They've already put stuff in place for when she next falls pregnant. I got sweet f.a after my 2nd - maybe they could have prevented this third one at 11 weeks?! Plus i saw the consultant at 6 weeks (when we saw the heartbeat) and she just basically said that at 40 it is a matter of hitting a good egg. But clearly there is soooo much more shr could have done than to badically advise me to sit tight and hope "it's a good egg." Happy for friend, but after 3 mc it just made me feel so - uncared for!!!!

Bloody hell Freckle I could have written your post, we seem to be following the same horrible path. I was taking a lorry load of supplements to improve egg quality and acupuncture and possibly it helped get me pregnant but obviously it didn't help with the egg quality.

It's the quality of the lining you need to be seeing treatment/testing for as well as the eggs. Implantation function is an area of research that seems to up gaining ground. It's much more complex than traditional advice takes into account. That's the purpose of the progesterone from day 21 at Coventry and then the heparin to help the placenta get going. Sorry so many having a tough time this weekend. ((Hugs))

*seeking not seeing

Oh twilight poor the both of you. He must be realky worried about you bless him but that must have been really tough to hear him say. Am sure he was just having one of those horrible Middle of the night dark thoughts. You will both get through this together and you'll be stronger for it. What was the AIBU? I've only ever got in one argument on here and it was a thread started by someone who was pissed of the sonographer at her 20w scan was rude and she didn't get to find out the gender. She said he DP said 'well that was a waste of time, wasn't it' as they left the room. I just couldn't not post. So I did. So did lots of other people actually. And she was un-empathetic to anyone else's experience. Made me really sad, still does. Glad I posted tho.

Am sorry you had a bad night sebs. The middle of the night waking is the worst. I had a particularly rough time after the last MC and really struggled to cope for a while. My thoughts were just so bleak. But you will feel better. Slowly but surely. This is a journey and at the moment it's a fucking shitty one. It's a slow train through shitsville and we've all got crap seats. But there's some pretty awesome other ladies in your carriage. The only thing you can be sure of is the scenery will change and one day it won't be shitsville anymore. It'll be alright in the end. And if its not alright, it's not the end.

Thanks for all the great advice re temping ladies. I can't name check you all bcos it's a different thread! I'm not the greatest sleeper, particularly those 4/5am wake ups but am going to give it a go and not get too stressed out if it doesn't show ov yeah right

My stats:
Me 37, dp 40
Ttc no 1 since April '13
Tfmr at 12 weeks following edwards diagnosis Jan 14
Mmc at 8 weeks (baby measured 5/6) June 14. Trisomy 22.
Ttc since then (7 cycles and counting) going quietly insane.