Recurrent Miscarriage Support Thread 16 - tests, treatment and trying again

[Justonemoretime]

Information, support, hand holding, tea, sympathy and a hell of a lot of combined knowledge - all welcome as we try to make sense of the RMC roller coaster of tests, NHS admin, heart ache and (hopefully) happy endings!
Please start with a recap of your stats :)

Loopy

Twilight I agree with Cat, from my extensive recent googling (for my own purposes) you'd be lucky to see a hb at 6 wks and its more common around 7 wks. Also like you say a tilted uterus can make it more difficult to see and they may not be able to see as much detail as they would with a normal one. Glad you're ok now you've had your cheesecake! I hope the time passes quickly til your next scan but I'm sure it'll feel like an eternity!
Purple it might be worth speaking to your mw if you're at all worried and they can put your mind at ease. Hhhmmmm mumps, lovely! Not sure if there's any risks there (not to my knowledge) but I'd also mention it to mw. Hope you feel better soon and can relax.

Thank you barkingtreefrog! And yay for your triple lining! I love how excited about things like that I get now - oddly proud of myself for the shape of my uterus. Simple pleasures. How were your follicles looking? Are you having IUI? Is the difference between that and IVF that they don't 'harvest' the egg? Just inseminate the sperm at the optimum moment?

Me2Me2 thank you for that, really useful info. Like with everything to do with miscarriage it seems there is a difference of opinion. As far as I can tell there's not that much they can actually do to improve lining so perhaps that's where the ambiguity comes from. Will certainly let you know what my GP says.

catlover do you mind me asking why they did the hysterocopy(s)? That's what I want! Apparently the only way to really tell if there is scarring from erpc (which can cause thin lining/light periods) is hysterocopy. But I thought the only way you could get it done was privately, I heard the NHS wouldnt do it.

twilight I know how easy it is for small comments or things you read on the internet to send you into meltdown. I'm glad you're feeling a bit better. The waiting is interminable. Just try and keep busy is my only good advice

Sorry to hear your news loopy

baking I'm so glad to hear Faith is doing well. It's little wonder you're finding it very hard to sleep. I'm so glad you're feeling stronger during the day but things can seem so bleak at night. Take good care of yourself and just try and rest as much as possible, even if sleep eludes you. x

Just wrote an epic post but lost it and dinner is about to burn but just wanted to send hugs to loopy. Glad you are getting referred but wishing there was no need, and to baking. Glad to hear Faith has been rallying but still sorry for your awful ordeal. Hope mri is soon and brings positive news.

Purple, I don't think anything to do with movements is very scientific. I still wish I had more - she has very quiet periods for hours or days at a time. Have you had mumps? It's not one I have heard you have to be careful to avoid (isn't it worse for men?) But no harm speaking to your gp or midwife.

Twilight, I didn't see a HB until after 6 weeks. Hope you can relax (ha ha, I know) until the next scan.
*Loopy, sorry you've had bad news confirmed. Hope you get some tests/answers/a plan soon.
Baking, glad Faith seems more stable. Hope you get the MRI through soon.
Just been pathetically paranoid and got my sister to come over and changed my cats' litter box. Dh is away and I couldn't leave it a week. I owe her one...

Brummie girl, thanks so much for that, it's reassuring to hear what you know about him. Sounds like we are in good hands there. They took some blood today and they called back this afternoon to confirm the hcg levels are almost back to normal. I need to get some more done via the GP, not sure what, will dig out the forms they gave me tomorrow. I don't know when I will get to see him, I have to wait for a letter to be sent to me.

If it's any consolation my letter for him came through so quickly - I was really surprised.

I'm hoping he's as good as he is supposed to be too!! I'm glad I'm not the only one putting my faith in Worcester.

I just wish we didn't have to do it all. I still can't believe I've gone through it 3 times. Doesn't feel real, even now.

I've tried reading Prof Regans book again and for rmc it talks a lot about taking a long time to get pregnant before the mc's but that's the thing. It didn't take me long at all. I'm worried as to why did I have problems if it's no problem getting pregnant?

I'm searching for answers that I can't find at the moment

Same here Brummie girl. Got pregnant first month of trying (from one attempt) for ds1. Got pregnant first month of trying for ds2. Fell pregnant without trying whilst still breastfeeding ds2 before AF had returned post birth when ds2 was 12 months, but lost it. Fell pregnant again first time of trying, but mmc and ERPC. Then fell pregnant again first time of trying in December, again just had sex the once during the crucial window and lost it last week.

In my head either there was just something genetically wrong with our last 3, which I struggle with as that's a lot of bad luck in a row. Or I have suffered damage from 2 cs's and an ERPC. Or as suggested by the midwife I saw a couple of weeks ago, I might have I diagnosed PCOS and the fact I am currently a stone heavier than when I conceived ds1 and ds2 might be a crucial stone that's tipped my body over the edge and I need progesterone to maintain a pregnancy past the early stage. I'm not sure if there are any other possible scenarios. But this is all new to me as I didn't really hit the internet after the first two miscarriages.

That should read undiagnosed PCOS.

Some consultants are investigating hyper-fertility, where your uterus is too receptive and not selective enough. This tends to lead to a string of early loses where it doesn't take long to conceive. This theory is supported in Coventry, and the progesterone from day 21 is to help the lining quality and therefore improve selectivity. So conceiving may take longer but there is a better chance of it sticking when you do.

I've somewhat lost the thread after a few busy days.

baking, I can only imagine the depth and intensity of worry. Nights are always the darkest times for all the worst case scenario's to come flooding in. One day and one night at a time is the only way. I'm glad you have found a helpful fb group. Please don't ever worry about diverting the thread, we worry about you, we care about you, you must say whatever you like here, and at the same time not feel pressured to update us or post. I'm thinking about you and your family, and hope you have people close by to offer lots of support. Glad to hear Faith is a little more herself at the moment xxx

Sorry another mc has been confirmed loopy, hugs x

purple I hope the movements perk up soon, I know it must be nerve wracking for you but no doubt little one is just having a rest or hiding. You posted about your daughter a little while back, it sounds like it must have been a terrifying experience for you and hope she is doing well now x

brummie the need for answers is so frustrating. I feel it too. I hope we get some.

twilight step away from google. You know you will find stories of both types of endings. So far so good - and you don't know how long implantation took, or exact date of ovulation. The waiting comes now, so busy yourself with every kind of business, and get a scan one way or another, at the longest time you can bear to wait. If that's just a week, then that would still be long enough to know more. Today you are pg!

Welcome newbies, sorry you find yourselves here

Argh I may start chasing for embryo karyotyping results next week...I feel sick at the thought, but desperate to know.

Sorry to those I didn't name check..just supposed to be popping on here quickly..

monten yes, it's iui and you are right, they don't harvest the eggs like ivf. I inject every day to encourage follicle growth, and then they scan and do blood tests to see what's happening. I had two large and two small follicles today (that's good, any more than two leading follicles and the cycle would be cancelled due to the risk of multiples) but they're currently around 14mm and they need to be 18mm and the hormone levels in blood correct before I do the trigger shot to make me ovulate. DH then provides his sample, and they select the best swimmers from it to inseminate . I'll be back for another scan tomorrow, and I expect the day after as well (unless the acupuncture tonight boosted blood flow enough to make then grow 4mm overnight!) After the insemination, it's just the longest 2ww ever.....

Monten I had the ops mainly because of infertility investigations. Twice due to a suspected polyp and another time to rule out an issue with my uterine lining following very heavy periods. Each time it came back clear so I needn't have bothered I guess!

Loopy it might be worth seeing if someone could have the little ones for a day or two to give you a break as it does leave you a tad sore and tired. Glad to hear Brummie is with same consultant and knows he's good, that's very reassuring. Hope I didn't offend anyone with my concern about his age. I was just basing off experiences of consultants I've seen but of course they all vary and age is but a number!

barking glad the cycle is going well so far. I'm keeping everything crossed for a BFP very soon.

Yes, everything crossed for you Barking. X

barking...knew I would miss a few people...I meant to say, good luck and everything crossed for this cycle. Its a long old time consuming process for you hey. And I can see how the TWW must be unbearably long...

My sisters exact response about Mr Watts was "he is wonderful and will look after you".

Ahh don't worry Monten age is a funny thing. I think maybe I am relishing an old school consultant. Birmingham Women's by it's very nature is full of up to date, hot shot docs who relish challenges. Therefore that made me feel like unless you'd had 20 mc's with each with two heads they weren't really interested in a garden variety miscarriage. I felt like I just wasn't important enough. Maybe I'm being unfair but I guess I'm looking forward to a bit of down to earth help.

But I haven't been yet!!

Can someone remind me what the Coventry protocol is? Just so I know what is done there?

Why do I feel bad that I've been signed off for longer?

It's strange I feel like I'm being judged, that I should be getting over it and buck up my ideas and "get on with everything". It's almost like miscarriage is so taboo, that my grief is unacceptable and must be hidden away.

I want to scream from the rooftops. I want to tell anyone that will listen that I've lost 3 babies and next Tuesday would've been my first due date. I guess I want my grief to be recognised. But I feel like no one really wants to talk about it

Brummie, god, I so understand that feeling that people think you should have got over it! After my last one, I really hit that brick wall, and it was so hard to find an outlet for this relentless grief.

I had some counselling and acupuncture, which helped deal with some of the effects of grief, but otherwise it was being here where it felt safe (and even then I worried that I was taking up too much of everyone's time), and lots and lots of time. I withdrew from everything, including work, which I eventually resigned from, and didn't do much socialising.

it sounds empty now, but time does heal some of the scars. it never goes away, that "otherness", but it becomes easier to bare and feels less raw. It is still very early for you, and your grief is very natural.

The Coventry protocol is progesterone from 7 days post ov, which is continued until 12 weeks if pg, or stopped after BFN, and heparin from scan showing sac in the right place until 12 weeks. If you are diagnosed with high NK cells, prednisolone from BFP to 12 weeks.
I believe the uterine scratch is also beneficial as it encourages lining growth.

I hope your appointment goes well, when you have it.

Barking yes, good luck with this cycle, it sounds like things are going well for now.

Twilight I agree with everyone else, it is so early, and all you can do is just keep plodding! TIAP!

Baking pleased as punch that Faith is showing some encouraging signs. Willing everything to be OK. xxx

Bootles I seem to be following your pattern for multiple posts! Hope you're doing OK. We all want some answers for you. x

I am obviously wide awake because I have my consultant appointment in the morning. DH seems to have no idea how much anxiety this is provoking, the git is sleeping peacefully through it all...

I am reaching the home straight, and at 34 weeks I do believe I will have this baby. It might actually be fine and healthy. I might get to hold my wriggling baby. How amazing, daunting and terrifying that thought is. Somewhere I just have struggled to picture myself is right there in front of me. Wow.

In the meantime, I am exhausted, huge and uncomfortable, but heartened every time I feel movement.

When I think back to this time last year, when I was pg with my 5th MC, and how fucking awful and hopeless everything felt, I am amazed that I am here with maternity leave a week away.

I want everyone here to feel this way eventually. I have every faith that it will happen.

Sorry, the middle of the night always brings out the sentimental in me...

Tanny, hope you were able to get back to sleep and DH didn't snore too much!

Just a quick check in to thank you lovely ladies for encouraging me to chase if I could get my next consultant appointment to get bloods/ scan results brought forward. Yesterday after two weeks of chasing I've managed to bring it forward by 5 wks to 19th Feb, 5 months after the last MC. Hopefully will mean we'll be back ttc soon after.

Well done girlie your persistence paid off.

tanny hope the appointment today goes well. Is it a growth scan or just a check up?

brummie sending you a (((hug))) don't let others put expectations on you. It's odd how helpful it has been this last week that everyone has expected us to be devastated, like everyone has at least some understanding what it means to potentially lose your child or have a very different future. I think I've coped better because I've already done that lots of times before, whereas for DH he never felt like that about the Mcs so he is floundering.

barking v good luck for the next few days and the 2ww.

loopy and brummie hope the marvellous Mr Watts lives up to his reputation, it sounds like you are both in good hands.