Recurrent Miscarriage Support - tests, treatment, trying again - thread 10

[bakingtins]

Welcome everyone - pull up a chair! A thread for anyone who has suffered multiple miscarriages and is in need of information, moral support, tea or sympathy. Newbies very welcome.

Can we start the thread with a recap of where we are all up to again, please?

Swim all done, 01:25:17, better than I anticipated. :)

Great news Just! Well done! x :)

I am 44 years old and have a 5 year old and have been ttc again naturally for about 4 years. Am now miscarrying for the 5th time, 8 week scan yesterday revealed no heart beat and growth had stopped at 6 weeks. I can't seem to get past the 7-8 week mark, except once two years ago I carried to 12-13 weeks.

We underwent testing two years ago and I've been diagnosed with a slight clotting issue, so the past two pregnancies I've been on heparin and aspirin. Also progesterone, which may explain the missed miscarriage (first time that's happened to me)

I know what the stats say and the doctors keep reminding me that my chances are slim due to age.

I don't want to give up, but I'm starting to doubt my possibilities. I don't know if I'm kidding myself now. How many miscarriages are too many?
Is it really possible to carry a healthy baby to term at 44 after so many miscarriages?

Well done just have some well deserved

Welcome fall and sorry that you are going through it again. A lot of us are at the older end of the spectrum and whilst it does increase MC rate, it sometimes seems to be an excuse not to do anything. Have you had genetic testing on any of your MCs? It's worth pushing for this if not, it makes a difference if you are losing due to a chromosome problem and have to decide if you can keep trying for that elusive "good egg" or if you are losing normal embryos in which case I'd consider pursuing immune testing.
Only you can decide how many is too many. We had several "last tries" but always found the will to try again. My feeling in later stages was I would only try again if there was something different that could at least improve my chances. At my lowest point I'd had 4MC, all tests normal, most recent loss chromosonally normal, and the doc was telling me to try again. It seemed daft to me to keep doing the same thing and expect a different outcome, though if the loss had been e.g. a trisomy that would have been a sensible option.
It turned out I have high NK cells and a few months of steroids/clexane/progesterone later I have my beautiful daughter, in time for my 40th birthday.

Thanks Baking, just had a massive curry. Yum!
Welcome, Fall, sorry you find yourself here. I second that, genetic testing and no cells may give you the answers you need to make an informed decision. Good luck.

Hi fall, sorry you're here too. I'm similar to you. Had my 5th mc in Feb and have taken a break emotionally and physically before ttc again. Like baking, I had to have something new to try, and am currently waiting for my nk cell test results. It's the last thing on my list, so personally I'm on my last try.

Saying that, I feel it's the right decision for me. I need to be able to walk away before I become too despondent. The break has really helped, as has fortnightly acupuncture, counselling, meditation, testing, giving up a job I hated, and mumsnet. This thread has been a lifeline, and the women here are strong and supportive.

Just you fish you!

Well done just!

Welcome fall. Also 40 and also had 5 MCs...

Like Tanny being tested for NK cells and will give it one more go...

Foot cramp. You know what this means.

Are you symptom spotting, Tanny? ;)

Would I?

Come on, 'fess up. How many dpo? Lol. :)

6!

Lol. Have a fun week with that! ;)

Joining here for advice. Last weekend I had my third miscarriage in a year - ironically on what have been my due date if the first pregnancy had gone to term. The combination of the two dates has pushed me over the edge and I am just utterly devastated. I have two dds from a previous relationship but want a baby with my DH. How do others cope with this loss? All three of my losses were early and I almost feel guilty for grieving for something that never was.

Hi Piginmud, sorry you find yourself here. Make sure you ask for as much testing on yourself, your oh and the baby as you can, including genetic profiles. This will help you to make decisions about what to do next. Where are you based? St Mary's, London is good, as is Coventry. Good luck.

PigInMuck and Fall - just wanted to say that I'm so sorry for your losses. It's hard - no, its beyond hard and I wish none of use had to go through this. I found the strength of the ladies posting here over time a real lifeline and hope you will feel it helps in some way too. X x

So sorry pig. I'm also going through a due date stage and a few babies have just been born from some online friends so a bit tough...

Good luck getting tested

Also, accept counselling if offered

Hi Pig sorry you find yourself here. I echo what others have said. I managed to get all my testing done at my local hospital, but it was quite a piecemeal process. I've also been to Coventry for more specific nk cells testing, but that was last resort stuff as all my tests came back normalish. This is worth bearing in mind, as they only find a cause about 50% of the time.

If your DP doesn't have any DCs of his own, I would strongly push to have chromosome testing done as it takes about 6 weeks for the results, and can rule that out from the start. My DH has a "slight rearrangement" of one of his chromosomes but at the moment we don't know what that means.

Personally, it sounds as if you need a break from ttc and maybe counselling etc to support your grieving process. I found the cumulative effect of five MCs hard going, but it has forced me into looking at what other changes I need to make. I feel stronger for it.

The support on here is fantastic, you will be better informed and have a whole community of us so you don't feel alone with this.

Hi everyone!
Congrats to those pregnant, and keep holding on to the rest of us! I'm not sure how everyone is doing but I'm sure I will get caught up soon enough.
I'm 26 in 2wks yaay! Not very happy about that seeing as my son is going to 7 very soon! I have had 3 chemical pregnancies that I know of. This last one was March and it was very sad. I had what I suspect was hyper-ovulation! I had double pain, double +opk and double +hpts! My poor husband had to watch me suffer as pain meds only put me to sleep. I'm not one who can say if I hadn't tested I would never know which leads me to think this has been going on for 2 years. The crazy part is I never make it past my period!
Thanks for letting me rant you ladies are wonderful! I have never seen a group so kind and understanding!

Pig and fall, so sorry for your losses and all you're going through. I'm learning from experience that you have to keep pushing for tests, information and help. The nhs is really rubbish at dealing with mcs and that's why we have to keep on challenging!

Fall, your age is not a reason to not get help. There are lots of women who have babies in their 40s now. If the nhs won't help you can see prof Q privately in Coventry, don't know where you live though.

Coco, congrats on being 26 weeks. Must feel like an amazing gift after all you've been through? Don't worry about the age gap between your two DC. There is 7 years between me and my brother and we love each other so so much. I couldn't wish for anything different to what we have!

After two mcs and five years of infertility I have been in a very bad way as some of you ladies will know. I am now focusing on getting my body ready for trying again, wine has been poured down the sink and there's lots of healthy food and vitamins in our fridge now :)

I see my fertility consultant on 9th July to run through mc tests and then if all clear we can ttc again. I'm going to be taking a mini aspirin each day. Do any of you lovely ladies have experience with this?

Thanks to all on here for the support, information and chats. I need to believe things can get better!

XxX

Thanks for the advice and kind words. My body has still not completed this mc (long story!) but my mind has moved on.

I have been talking to my husband (who was the one to say we should give it another go) about testing before we try again.

I'm in Spain so I think my only option would be a private doctor as the national health will take too long and my GP suggested they wouldn't even test me because of my age. (not sure she is right about that, they tested me at 42).

I assume that a fertility clinic would be that best place to go though my DH and I agree that we do not want IVF. I have been reading up on NK cells but not sure if they test for it here. How do they test you for NK cells (blood test?) and how do they treat you if they are high (steriods through the pregnancy?)? Is this still experimental?

I have been investigating fertility clinics on the internet, looking at ones that mention recurrent miscarriage. Anyone have experience using a clinic for testing?

As far as I am aware here in the UK there are 2 places to go for NK testing. a doctor in London does blood tests and in Coventry Prof Quenby and Prof Brosens (who I saw 2 weeks ago) do it by Uterine Biopsy

Would it be possible for you to pop to the UK for a Coventry visit? costs £360 and after the initial consultation it's all by phone/email (I am in London and travelled to Coventry for my appointment and will have the results by email/phone)

Hi ladies I've not been on this thread for a long time but just wanted to update, after suffering 4 miscarriages and losing hope that we would ever have a baby our beautiful baby girl was born on Friday by emergency section weighing 7lb 3. Pregnancy was the most stressful thing I've ever gone through after all that heartache but I just wanted to say don't give up hope I know it's you don't believe things will ever work out but it can and hopefully will for you all.

Congratulations butterfly