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Miscarriage/pregnancy loss

Find support and share your experiences on our Miscarriage forum. See also legal rights and support after baby loss.

Recurrent Miscarriage Support - tests, treatment, trying again - thread 9

995 replies

bakingtins · 19/01/2014 07:41

Welcome everyone - pull up a chair! A thread for anyone who has suffered multiple miscarriages and is in need of information, moral support, tea or sympathy. Newbies very welcome.

Can we start the thread with a recap of where we are all up to again, please?

OP posts:
Tryingno1 · 15/05/2014 11:20

Hi guys! Yes has for busy!
Tiny-that's good things r back on track! My periods always misbehaved post miscarriage and it does my head in! At least u can see quenby and get things moving
Aofie keep us updated.

Anyone got any tips for getting this last 15mm product out of me! I've stopped bleeding and not feeling hopefully that it will have gone by next week :(

Tryingno1 · 15/05/2014 11:29

Appalling grammar and spelling sorry!
iPhone!

TinyTear · 15/05/2014 11:44

trying when I got scanned 2 weeks after medical management they said there was still retained products but as it wasnt much not to worry,. then i had AF 6 weeks after the medical management and now another 28 days after that, so things did seem to resolve themselves...

you should be ok after the next cycle (i hope)

Tryingno1 · 15/05/2014 15:08

Ok great! Good to know! Fingers crossed then....thanks x

Justonemoretime · 15/05/2014 17:16

Trying, hope its sorted soon. Remember, the body reabsorbs some stuff, so you may be OK even if you don't 'pass' anything. Good luck.
Seasalt, I'm on the progesterone 21-28 regime and my AF kicks in about 24-36 hours after the last one. Messy things, aren't they!
Got GP to write me a note to get a blood test for coeliac disease so will get that done at local hospital tomorrow and should get the results in a week. GP thinks its unlikely, but was happy to order the test and rule it out.

Amy2014 · 15/05/2014 21:48

Dr just rang... Some results are back... I'm so scared...what results are back in 3 days? My bloods .. That points to infection then... The amniocentisis goes to the uk so it's hardly those yet...so nervous ladies...

bakingtins · 15/05/2014 22:17

Have you got an appointment to discuss them, amy ? Hope you are not in suspense too long. Flowers

OP posts:
Amy2014 · 15/05/2014 22:29

Sorry I should have said tomorrow at 11.30 at the Hosp. Do u think it's my bloods... It must be...only tests that'd be back that quick...

bakingtins · 15/05/2014 23:06

I'm not sure. it doesn't necessarily mean they have tested positive, they may just be keeping you in the loop. Try to get some sleep, you'll be in a better frame of mind to deal with the news tomorrow.

OP posts:
Aoifebelle · 15/05/2014 23:28

I poas as I suspected negative. I seem to be pretty fertile, but not that feckin fertile. No sign of af tho. 2nd post mc,so maybe to be expected.

amy results are nothing to be scared of, results give you more information. Even if your results throw up an issue, chances are it will be something that can be sorted, which may increase your chances next time round. Knowledge is power.

tannyLoo · 16/05/2014 07:25

Amy I agree, unknown and unexplained is horrible. Actually, it's all horrible.

So sorry you're going through this. Some virtual hand holding from Somerset.

tannyLoo · 16/05/2014 07:39

And thank you all for your support and encouragement. People irl don't seem to get it. I think this whole process changes us fundamentally and we have to make our lives as good as they can be. When I realised that part of my disappointment with my last mc was not being able to go on mat leave, I knew things had to change...

In other news, if everything goes to plan I should ov next weekend and can make my Prof Q appt. My af has got lighter this month after a few heavier ones, so I'm back on the snake oil maca root and omega complex to try and improve things.

Amy2014 · 16/05/2014 09:05

Thanks so much. Ur right to know is better I'm just scared it's going to be something I could have prevented and then I will never forgive myself. I hear u on the mat leave Tanny loo another 3 weeks and my baby would have been considered a "baby" and I would have been qualified for 6 months mat leave. It's an extra kick in the teeth. I'm almost tempted to ask the gp to alter the dates but I feel it would be disrespectful to my baby to do it. Hmm

Amy2014 · 16/05/2014 09:10

Also just to say I am so glad I found MN. I was a part timer on an Irish web forum RC but I found it so cold and unsympathetic I couldn't bring myself to seek support there. I feel happy here more cared about even after such a few days. That could be because I am holed up in my room ( it's become my cocoon) and I just browse MN. I don't feel like talking to anyone of my friends or family at all. Is that strange?

TinyTear · 16/05/2014 09:35

Not strange Amy...

In real life I don't talk to many people either. there is one friend who had 2 losses as well (but has 4 children) who I can talk to, but mostly I do it online.

I don't hide it anymore, if people ask, I mention it... but that sort of attitude only came recently after the counselling I had after MC4

SeaSaltMill · 16/05/2014 10:22

Thanks Justonemoretime. AF still hasn't shown up. The last prog I took was Tuesday night. Hopefully it arrives today.

Tryingno1 · 16/05/2014 11:51

Hi Amy- let us know wot the doctor says. Hopefully it's nothing or something easily sorted
I don't talk to many people in rlife either. Noone really understands the loss/anxiety and stress it brings. Nice (although unfair) that others can somewhat relate and help Eachother through this horrible time...
Seasalt-hope it turns up soon! Have u done another pt just to be sure sure?

JBrd · 16/05/2014 13:44

Amy Hope that you will get some answers, the not knowing is awful. I remember almost wishing that they would find something definite that was wrong, which could be easily treated, so that I would be guaranteed a successful pregnancy next time... Sadly, it is never that easy.
I know that it is very hard to talk about all this in RL, but you might be surprised - so very many women experience mc, but because no one really talks about it openly, many of us are left to deal with it alone.
You might be surprised, if you dare to people know! It's of course such a personal issue.
But I found that literally everyone in my circle of friends and family who has been or is ttc has had at least one mc! Which, on one hand, is rather depressing, but at the same time, reassures me that I am not alone in this misery. People are often a lot kinder and more understanding that we will give them credit for.

I'm with tiny - I don't hide it anymore either (at least not actively), when the situation arises, I do mention my mcs. And I've not had a 'bad' reaction yet. Of course, only people with children or who have had a similar experience will ever understand the scope of loss and pain, but that is understandable - I was like that, before it happened to me!

tanny Good luck with the job hunt! I did something very similar after my first mc - I had been miserable in my job, and the prospect of mat leave was the only thing that kept me going. When I mc, I realised that I needed to do something because going back to the job I hated added so much to my misery. It felt very liberating handing in my notice, it was definitely the right thing to do! At least this is something you can influence and be proactive about...

It's now been 2 weeks since my medical management - I am doing OK, in terms of being able to function at least. Work has been a good distraction, giving me something to focus on and to get stuck in.
My bleeding has stopped, and I am currently producing obscene amounts of ewcm, wondering if I'm ovulating... But I'm not testing, haven't even checked if I get a BFN again. Head in the sand about everything to do with ttc... It really doesn't appeal to me at the moment, to say it midly. Trying to get my head around potential routes forward... Will definitely look into NK cell testing, and I am thinking that maybe adoption might be something that I might consider... I have this underlying panic about not having another DC that I didn't have with my previous mcs...very difficult to explain, but the idea that DS could be my only one is now much more real than every before, and I can't stay calm when I think about this. Starting to wonder if I should try counselling, I'm worried that this could develop into anxiety/panic attacks.

Star2489 · 16/05/2014 16:08

Hi
I wondered if anyone could share any of there stories, I have had 3 miscarriages all at the 6 week mark, recently had the blood tests to check for blood clotting but been told they have come back normal? The dr thinks my hormone levels are ok but not had all the tests for that yet, I have been prescribed hormone pessaries for when I fall pregnant again which we got told me could try again straight away ! Anyone had a similar situation and can give me any info or thoughts would be appreciated as I now feel we are back to square one and just got to wait and see if we have a 4th miscarriage ?
Thanks

bakingtins · 16/05/2014 19:46

welcome star

As jbrd said on your other thread, that sounds like a very half-assed investigation. You should have had armfuls of blood taken for full blood count, diabetes, thyroid hormones, and a raft of APS/ clotting tests, plus karyotyping (genetic tests) for both partners and if possible on products of miscarriage. Cycle day 2 tests for FSH/LH and CD21 for progesterone, mid cycle ultrasound scan to check ovaries, uterus, cervix. I'd expect you to have been referred to the local RMC clinic and seen by a consultant gynaecologist (or at least seen an underling but be under a consultant's care)
Even after that little lot they only find a reason in 50% cases. If you are in the " no reason" camp the stats say you have a 70% success rate, irrespective of treatments in next pregnancy. If a reason is found then they should be able to give you specific treatment to improve your chances.
I was in the 'no reason' group then had a 4th MC that was genetically tested as normal. I then found out about immune causes of MC which are not tested for on the NHS, went to see Prof Quenby who you'll see is mentioned a lot if you scroll back, was diagnosed with high NK cells, treated with steroids, heparin and progesterone and am 37 weeks ( full term yay Smile today)
With hindsight I would have gone to Prof Q before TTC again when the NHS tests were normal, but it sounds like you need to pursue more comprehensive testing before exploring that. Don't be fobbed off, it's easy for them to say " go try again" when it's not them suffering the losses. Be as sure as you possibly can be that they are not missing something before you put yourself back in the firing line.

OP posts:
bakingtins · 16/05/2014 19:48

amy hope you are ok and just digesting whatever news you got today. Flowers

jbrd how is being back at work?

OP posts:
JBrd · 16/05/2014 22:30

star Yes, baking is right, I forgot about the scan! Def go back and ask for tests, you are entitled to them.

amy Hope you are OK...

baking Full term, woohoo! You'll get to meet your baby really soon Smile What a journey you have been on - but it will so have been worth it.

Work has been OK, it's been very busy, which has given me something to focus on and to get stuck in. Still very up and down on some days... I have to be careful what I read on the internet during my breaks, as I am very prone to welling up!
Currently replanning the rest of my year, now that I won't be going on mat leave in September Sad It sucks. I have been rubbish at staying in touch with friends last year, as I have been so consumed by ttc, being pg and having mcs... Feeling very guilty, esp about a couple of very good friends of mine who live abroad and who have no idea why I suddenly went AWOL... I just couldn't get my head around things like writing Christmas cards, or long emails about how I am and what has been happening, let alone speaking on the phone. So now trying to re-establish contact, hoping they will understand.

Star2489 · 16/05/2014 23:49

Thank you baking I have replied to JBrd on the other tread explaining the tests they have given me etc... I think it just looks like I was really rushed and didn't have it explained to me very well, but being told my tests at 'normal' I am unsure what to expect now? The secretary said that she would get the doctor to write with my tests still so hopefully when that comes then that might explain the next process, is it an odd thing to say that I was hoping something came back abnormal so that we are able to put our finger on the problem and treat it! (Confused)

Amy2014 · 17/05/2014 00:01

So it was chromosomal.. Nothing I could have prevented or had any control over. That's 4 mcs last year before 12 weeks and this little babba at 5 months.... How can I ttc again?? I don't think I can i would be too scared.
Also the dr said to me about mat leave but I said I thought u had to be 24 weeks to qualify so he said gp could give me sick certain instead then. Do I qualify for mat leave? Could I?

Justonemoretime · 17/05/2014 06:50

Amy, I'm sorry that this has happened to you but I hope that having an answer of a chromosomal abnormality help you forgive yourself a little. Have you and your partner been tested (karyotyping)? This takes 6 weeks to come back, so get the ball rolling if you can. Sometimes one of you may be carrying a translocated chromosome which does you no harm, but can cause problems if passed on. Extra tests at ivf (preimplantation genetic diagnosis) can screen for this do that only embryos who are not affected are implanted. You would only be offered this if you or your partner had a chromosome issue.
Also, do see what your work HR say about mat leave, they may have rules that apply from 20 weeks, and, regardless, take as much sick leave as you need.

Star, its frustrating, isn't it. I'm 'normal' too Hmm but Prof Quenby's tests found I was at the lower end of normal and proscribed progesterone. Have you considered going to her clinic?

Had my blood test for coeliac disease yesterday, so I have another way to find out I'm normal next week. Joy!

Baking, congratulations Grin you've been on such an amazing journey, and shown us how its done. Wink