Amy Hope that you will get some answers, the not knowing is awful. I remember almost wishing that they would find something definite that was wrong, which could be easily treated, so that I would be guaranteed a successful pregnancy next time... Sadly, it is never that easy.
I know that it is very hard to talk about all this in RL, but you might be surprised - so very many women experience mc, but because no one really talks about it openly, many of us are left to deal with it alone.
You might be surprised, if you dare to people know! It's of course such a personal issue.
But I found that literally everyone in my circle of friends and family who has been or is ttc has had at least one mc! Which, on one hand, is rather depressing, but at the same time, reassures me that I am not alone in this misery. People are often a lot kinder and more understanding that we will give them credit for.
I'm with tiny - I don't hide it anymore either (at least not actively), when the situation arises, I do mention my mcs. And I've not had a 'bad' reaction yet. Of course, only people with children or who have had a similar experience will ever understand the scope of loss and pain, but that is understandable - I was like that, before it happened to me!
tanny Good luck with the job hunt! I did something very similar after my first mc - I had been miserable in my job, and the prospect of mat leave was the only thing that kept me going. When I mc, I realised that I needed to do something because going back to the job I hated added so much to my misery. It felt very liberating handing in my notice, it was definitely the right thing to do! At least this is something you can influence and be proactive about...
It's now been 2 weeks since my medical management - I am doing OK, in terms of being able to function at least. Work has been a good distraction, giving me something to focus on and to get stuck in.
My bleeding has stopped, and I am currently producing obscene amounts of ewcm, wondering if I'm ovulating... But I'm not testing, haven't even checked if I get a BFN again. Head in the sand about everything to do with ttc... It really doesn't appeal to me at the moment, to say it midly. Trying to get my head around potential routes forward... Will definitely look into NK cell testing, and I am thinking that maybe adoption might be something that I might consider... I have this underlying panic about not having another DC that I didn't have with my previous mcs...very difficult to explain, but the idea that DS could be my only one is now much more real than every before, and I can't stay calm when I think about this. Starting to wonder if I should try counselling, I'm worried that this could develop into anxiety/panic attacks.