Recurrent miscarriage testing and beyond.. Part 6.. Over here!

[orangebowl]

We have filled up the last thread so here is the next.. Deep breath and grit your teeth for the roller coaster of emotions that continues... Hope tea and butterfly and all find it!

[teaandchocolate]

I think it's due tomorrow if I ovulated when i thought I did. But now thinking maybe I didn't. Been getting ewcm on and off for the past week so maybe cycles just messed up? If my dates are right I will know tomorrow when AF arrives. At least if it does it disprove my unfussy uterus theory! Feel like this has all been going on so long :(

[GuppieK]

Sorry to hear it was negative teaandchocolate Do you feel like AF is coming? It's so disappointing, especially when you feel like you've had weird twinges and pains, which I've had quite a bit over the past few cycles and which have come to nothing. I think as Schooldilemas says, testing isn't always accurate until you're late and it's hard to know when late is if your cycles aren't that reliable. I wouldn't give up this month yet. I haven't quite although been having cramping for days now which would have used to mean AF very imminent! I guess I'll probably wait until day 32ish if nothing happens, so Thursday, in case I'm on a long cycle. If I am though, we probably didn't do it enough at the right time.

God, I remember years ago working with a woman who bored me silly talking about all this stuff for the 7 months she was trying to conceive. Now I'm going through it I'm suddenly a lot more sympathetic!

[teaandchocolate]

Thanks Guppie. I know what you mean it's so boring isn't it! I drive myself mad trying to figure out what's going on. I feel a bit crampy so AF could be imminent. But then when I'm pregnant I'm also crampy! And usually when I use first response they're positive really early. Just want to know one way or the other so at least I can have a glass of if I'm not preg!! I swear I've been feeling nauseous but now thinking its all psychological!

When would your AF normally come-Thurs at the latest? Have you been testing quite a bit? It's such a long drawn out process isn't it?! And my DH just doesn't get it at all...soooo glad I can moan on here!!

[GuppieK]

It is great to be able to moan to people who understand on here! My DH is good... but I couldn't speak to him, or many people, in so much detail really.

I don't remember getting cramps when I was pregnant before. I think I felt like AF wasn't coming. I only got the cramps just before it went wrong, so I really hope they're not a regular part of being pregnant if I get there again or I'll be a nervous wreck!

Thursday would be the latest mine has been - I think that would be 33/34 days - and if it's negative then I'll be very confused. I usually just test once or twice every month. On the day my AF is due and then maybe a few days later if it seems to be late.

I've got to say, I'm still drinking a little bit throughout the month. I started off being super good but it's just been so long now and I guess a little bit of me says, well not drinking anything while trying to conceive hasn't done a fat lot of good up until now! I feel like I've taken enough folic acid to sink a small ship too...

[teaandchocolate]

I know - I'm rattling with the amount of vitamins and supplements I'm taking!! I am also trying to only have one cup of tea a day to reduce caffeine intake but finding it so hard as just want cups of tea all day to cheer me up! Not drinking as I'm too paranoid but to be fair it's only been a few weeks so far...

I've had cramping through all my pregnancies. Not so bad that I needed painkillers but just 'feelings' the whole time. I presumed it was just things going on inside & I also think I can feel my ovaries when I ovulate!

I would never talk to people in this much detail - don't think anyone would listen! My DH is rather useless to be honest as he really doesn't know what to say. Just tells me to make the most of and appreciate time with DD which just makes me feel guilty. Obviously I am so grateful for her but doesn't change the fact that I had a shit year last year and I can't just get over it as I've got to keep trying to get pregnant!! Ok rant over!

[butterfly86]

Sorry you got a negative tea :-( with my last pg I got a negative with first response, tested with supermarket own following day and got positive then did clearblue just to be sure so sometimes I don't think fr are as accurate as they say. Praying the test is wrong for you x

[teaandchocolate]

Thanks Butterfly. That's really interesting as I thought first response were the best! I've only got one clear blue digital left at home and don't want to waste it so will wait a bit and if AF doesn't come will test again. But do think its very unlikely I'm preg. Treated myself to a cup of normal to tea to console myself

Thanks everyone for the support. Feel lucky to have this forum! x

[orangebowl]

Make the most I normal tea! I'm Si jealous.. The thought if it makes me feel sick and I'm normally a lots of cuppas a day girl.. Hot blackcurrant is my replacement but just isn't the same. #alwayssomethingtomoanabout

[butterfly86]

I've been very naughty and had a cup of coffee the last 2 days! I just thought stuff it it's done me no favours giving it up anyway, I won't drink it all the time but I really fancied one. There's very little chance I could be pg anyway I really wanted to wait til I'd had a period but we did dtd a few times, I thought I was having period last week but it stopped I'm just getting odd bits of spotting every couple of day I don't know what's going on my boobs are sore though and have been for a week so I'm guessing it's going to arrive soon!

[orangebowl]

I got really drunk in my 2ww that resulted in this pregnancy ( to be fair doesnt take much- 3 glassesnof wine and a jarger bomb!) . I just thought.. I've been doing everything so perfectly so far and it hasn't made the slightest bit if difference. A girl at work smoked and drank through her whole accidental pregnancy and baby was perfect (obviously I don't wish the baby wasn't). But just made me think.. I wouldn't drink in 1st 12 wks since BFP but flippin heck a cup if coffee or a slightly runny egg is NOT going to cause a miscarriage.

[teaandchocolate]

Butterfly have you tested? Could be either really couldn't it? Do you think you ovulated when you dtd?

I decided I'll have one cup of tea a day as I'm an addict (as my name suggests!) but not sure if I should cut out completely? Makes me so mad though that some people drink, smoke and eat crap through their pregnancies and are fine, just keep popping them, out whereas we all try so hard and struggle to get anywhere!

[butterfly86]

You are so right school but whenever it goes wrong I always question myself did I do this or that even tho I know it's nothing I did, it's ridiculous! There are so many people who drink, smoke, run and they are ok. Sometimes you have to just say f@*k it and enjoy yourself, I've wasted (well not so much wasted but you know what I mean) the best part of a year, I've hardly had a drink I"ve been pregnant birthday, christmas and family parties. I"m not going to be stupid but how far do you go with putting your life on hold. I even find my self almost saying to people I know "that's got such and such in you shouldn"t have that! It's mental. I'm now going to go in the kitchen and have a folic acid and a gin & tonic :-)

[butterfly86]

Tea no I haven't tested I will admit it's crossed my mind I could be but I doubt it, I would have to have ovulated soon after the bleeding from the mc stopped which is a possibility and I did have ewcm but oh would have to be superman as we have only did it 2 or 3 times. I'm having. lots of crampy twinges and doctor is going to do some swabs when I'm not bleeding incase I've got an infection as I've had a couple of symptoms. So I think I'm just all messed up I'd be thrilled if I was pg of course but I'm not going to test I don't think I can bear the stressx

[teaandchocolate]

I had something similar with my last pregnancy in that I was about to go to the doctor as my period hadnt turned up for 10 weeks after my mc. Anyway turns out I was pregnant again after just a couple of times dtd - I normally get pregnant so easily. I'd do a test before you see the doctor maybe!

[butterfly86]

I seem to fall quite easily too, took a few months the first time but after that I've been "fortunate" my consultant said it's remarkable when we decide we want to be pregnant it happens which is a good thing. Now I've said that it will prob take forever! I have thought to myself well if my period doesn't turn up I'll wait until I see my consultant (which is about 6 weeks away) then if I have fallen pregnant by then she will just find out ha! I know that sounds stupid but if I don't know then Im ok, I feel like if I did test and it was positive I would just think well I'm spotting so I'm miscarrying again, whereas if I don't know then I'm just randomly spotting. Hope that doesn't sound totally ridiculous- I know you will know what I mean!

[teaandchocolate]

Totally know what you mean! I want to be one of those people who doesn't know they're pregnant until 4 months...or when they give birth! But not much chance of that as I'm obsessed with what's going on inside. Also am going to take progesterone from when I get a bfp so kind of need to know. How good if you got to the appointment and they told you you're 12 weeks preg!!

[butterfly86]

That would be fantastic tea can you imagine! But I'm the same as you I'm too in tune with my body now I couldn't get away with it and I need to be monitered so would need to know really. I would test after a while but I'm only on about cd27 that's if I count first day of mc bleeding as day one and it's bound to be messed up so I'm sure there's plenty of time for af to arrive yet....

[teaandchocolate]

I think I've totally messed up my calculations and so annoyed with myself. No sign of AF and not pregnant, yet we stopped dtd about 14 days ago as thought I'd ovulated. Now thinking I actually ovulated a few days ago which means we missed it. Maybe my cycles have gone mad as am stressed about ttc? Either way I'm really annoyed and frustrated and so confused about what my body is doing!! Now want AF to just arrive so can start again! Argh! DH & i need to make more of an 'effort' next cycle....

[butterfly86]

Don't be too hard on yourself tea we can only have a good guess at ovulation really, though ovulation only a few days ago does seem quite late what makes you think that? Have you tested again?

[teaandchocolate]

Just because I'm a panicker & AF normally arrives 14 days after when I think I've ovulated. A few days ago I got loads of ewcm (more than a couple of weeks ago) but I put it down to early pregnancy or pre-AF cm (sorry if tmi!). I stopped dtd ages ago as was worried about conceiving late in a cycle causing mc (as my last pregnancy was conceived on day 50 or something!) but I think DD was conceived on a 7 week cycle so maybe its ok? I know its stupid worrying as its too late now so just need to wait for AF or test again but I do find it hard to be rational at the moment...thanks for reading this. I am so boring!!!

[butterfly86]

You aren't boring it's very stressful. I get lots of ewcm in early pregnancy, I do get a bit before af too but not as much. I also worry about concieving late in my cycle or that it takes too long to implant I normally ov around cd18 ish and with my last pg I didn't get "implantation bleeding" if thats what it was until about cd29 or something can't remember exactly so I came to the conclusion it took too long and that's why it failed. It's utter shite this. this ttc lark it messes with your head! Sorry you are feeling like this hopefully you will know either way soon x

[teaandchocolate]

Thank you so much Butterfly you are so sweet! It totally messes with your head! I don't think I've ever had implantation bleeding to be honest. Now I don't feel anything really will just have to see what happens tomorrow. Might but some cheap tests later in the week but I'm not hopeful. Would rather AF just came and next cycle I'll make more effort...if I've not gone insane in the meantime...!

[GuppieK]

Hey tea, it does mess with your head totally. I got AF this afternoon. Did a second test in the morning out of impatience because after a week of cramps they disappeared for 24hrs and I felt a bit hopeful... now feel like an idiot for not just waiting and like I basically have done the equivalent of peeing on a £5 note..! On the plus side, it's day 28 of cycle today so maybe getting back to normal. On the downside, it probably means I ovulated when I thought I would and we dtd loads at the right time!! I can't believe that after getting pregnant three times quite quickly it might take a while now. This was my fourth month of trying and there was me thinking at least I wouldn't have to stress about the conceiving bit!

[teaandchocolate]

Hi Guppie! I felt the same about the stupid pregnancy test. Really want to test again but don't want to waste more money. Sorry you're not pregnant this month although yey for a 28 day cycle! I've never had one of those! Means you can start trying again quickly. My theory that I get pregnant too fast & even the rubbish embryos implant (& then miscarry) means that the fact it's taking you a while could be a good thing and your body is being selective and waiting for the perfect embryo. If my random logic is any consolation?!

I still have no AF and getting quite a bit of cervical mucus (sorry TMI!!) and am so confused about what it all means!! I just have no patience. If I'm not pregnant I want to know so I can eat runny eggs and drink wine and stop worrying for another few weeks. If I am pregnant (very doubtful) then I can start taking progesterone. However starting to think my cycle was just stupidly long again and I didn't actually ovulate until last week which would be day 30 or something so totally missed it. And that is just very annoying!

[GuppieK]

Thanks for your reply Tea. Hope you're doing okay. I hope there might be something to your theory and my body is being selective! I have no patience either, but also I want to know when I'm pregnant asap so I can get heparin. One of my mcs was quite early at about 6 weeks so figuring it would be good to get going with the aspirin and heparin. The consultant said to call as soon as I get the positive test. Can start trying all over again in few more days..! Going to use ovulation tests this month as haven't bothered previously, just been dtd every other day. Worth trying a different approach I guess...