Partial molar and molar pregnancy support thread - all welcome!

[MrsJohnDeere]

I thought I would start this thread as a place where anyone who is going this or has gone through this in the past could share experiences, vent about life, etc.

After a MMC at 12 weeks and an ERPC a few weeks ago I've just found out the cause was a partial mole. I've been referred to Charing Cross and am waiting to hear back from them to start the monitoring etc.

I know the chances of cancer developing are about 1/100 but I'm still struggling with the 'OMG I'm going to die' feeling at the moment, plus the grief and stress of the miscarriage itself.

I haven't told anyone in RL, other than dh, even friends who know about the miscarriage. I'm worried abut how they'll react and that I'll end up blubbing.

Hi I found this forum and wanted to ask a question, I had a scan after 10days of bleeding on Tuesday and was told I was having a molar pregnancy, I then had a d&c midday yesterday (Wednesday) and was discharged around 6pm the bleeding stopped pretty much straight away then today around 6pm it started again pretty heavy... is this normal? I had never heard of a molar pregnancy until now and have previously had 2 successful pregnancy's.

Hi pompey sorry to hear that you are going through this. How heavy is your bleeding? After my d&c I bled for about a week, it would start to tail off and then start again but it was never any heavier than a period and mostly it was like the end days of a period. Xx

Hi pompey, I'm so sorry for your loss. I know you're going through a very scary and lonely time right now. You've found a good group of ladies here and we are all doing our best to support each other. I had a D&C in april and my bleeding was like oak's lasted about a week and seemed heavy to me since I usually have a light period. My doctor said it was totally normal. She said if you have a high fever or very bad pain along with the bleeding then call a doctor.

I know you must have a million questions and the internet and doctors seem not to have a whole lot to say on the subject. I found a link to Dr. Goldstein who is a specialist in the field in the US and will post it below. The information I found there was the most concise and easy to understand. This is what I gave to family to read when asked what was going on since it's so much to take in all at once.

Please stop by here for support and anything else you may need. You're not alone in this. big hug.

www.google.com/url?sa=t&rct=j&q=&esrc=s&source=web&cd=3&ved=0CDsQFjAC&url=http%3A%2F%2Fmymolarpregnancy.files.wordpress.com%2F2013%2F06%2Fthe-management-of-molar-pregnancy-for-patients.pdf&ei=2l1_U432KK7hsATd0ILoBg&usg=AFQjCNFRsZ-fTeh-EN_HCMjOLdv9OSK3LQ&sig2=px2WimHh675K4kyEeJmmSA&bvm=bv.67720277,d.cWc

kitty and rosie thanks so much for your support. I've got lots of kind friends and family but work is very male-dominated so less of a good place to share the details! Not felt that great today and charing x don't have results ready yet for some reason, though they say they have my sample...

Pompey poor you, I think I had a similar experience and bled for about three weeks eventually. The less you do the less you intend to bleed so take it easy for a bit. It takes a while to come to terms with it all. Bleeding for a while after seems to be the norm.

Bon weekend xx

tend to bleed not intend to bleed ... sorry!

Rosie thanks so much for your kind message. Really made me feel better. You're right - my daughter would understand and one day I'll explain it all to her. I feel like a better mum recently since I've been able to move forward a bit. I'm hopeful I'll be able to give her a sibling soon and the bigger gap than planned between them will not only be a sad reminder of what we went through but a battle scar in a way, to also remind me of what we can cope with and that we are strong. I have so much respect for anyone going through this, it's so tragic and takes such strength. Thanks so much for sharing your personal experience and I'm so sorry for your loss of your father, and at such a you and important age. I love that you took some positivity from it and reframed it as being something that showed you your mothers strength and love for you. I hope my daughter will think the same one day and like you learn that she too can be resilient and cope with adversity. Thank you so much.

You're so right about things not going the way we'd planned. It's so hard to wrap your head around losing the control. I'm sure all will work out fine despite your husband being older, I feel really confident that things will be ok for you - it's just difficult having the power taken away. It took 9 months to conceive my daughter and I know that's not long but it did feel like it at the time but I promise you once it happens all is forgotten and the timing of when it happens seems like the perfect time that was meant to be anyway. I'm really inspired by your positive take on all this. You're doing so well. Thanks for sharing your thoughts. Will be thinking of you this afternoon. Hope you get good results. I'm just waiting for my blood test now. Results next week. I only have to be 5 or under so fingers crossed.

pompey I'm so sorry you're going through this. I didn't have bleeding like that I'm afraid so I can't offer much advice but I'd phone charing cross or the specialist centre you're registered with. Just want to extend my support to you. We're all here for you. It's a terrible shock, specially having had successful pregnancies but is just a freak thing that can happen for no reason. Hopefully your numbers will go down and you won't need any further treatment. Keep us posted. I'm so sorry for your loss.

oak and hels hope you're doing ok.

Hope everyone has a good weekend. I think Rosie's advice for taking our minds off it is great advice. Thinking of you all xxx

Kitty I'm glad that my note helped you to feel a little better. Hearing from you and the other ladies has made me feel much much better and less like this is the end of the world. I know the age difference between your children will always be a reminder of this time and of your baby in heaven. I do feel strongly that your experience will someday help your daughter know how strong you are and how strong she can be.

I heard from the doctor and I am down to 25! I'm happy but she mentioned January as my possible TTC clear date. Seems so far away...I'm nervous to ask her about a 3 month wait instead. Is that silly? I know in the end it's my choice and I may not even be ready to try right away after the all clear but...who knows. Like you said, the no control is so so tough. I know you're probably right that once we do have a family that the struggle with timing will hopefully be a distant memory. I'm just so ready to be a mom already!!

Sending good vibes for you while you wait for your results! You're so close my friend! I hope to follow in your footsteps :)

Hels I work for a construction firm so, I know aaall about male dominated offices. Uhg, and it's and Egyptian firm so these guys have nooo boundaries when asking the ladies about marriage and babies...They all have good hearts though and know something is up and have definitely been treating me gently. Hopefully that is the same for you and your office men take good care of your feelings without being too 'Oh you're having female problems...'

Happy thoughts to all and fx for low numbers and fancy shoe purchases! :)

Meanwhile...
Today I told one of the guys I work with, who is someone I also go to the gym and take classes with, so kinda closeish for a co-worker. You know what he said (after I'm sorry for you loss. Very nice of him) 'are you eating enough antioxidants? I make shakes with berries...'

Lol...THAT'S what he said to me. I had to share...cause...really? Mmkay.

Hope that gives you guys a chuckle because I certainly had one after I firmly told him berries wouldn't help with this.

Thanks ladies for your comments and support, the bleeding has been a bit heavier than my periods and today there has been a lot of clots which has again worried me if it is normal? I have not yet been assigned a specialist centre, the hospital said I should hear from a referral they've made in the first day or 2 of being discharged but yet to hear. I live in Wales so it looks like the nearest centre will be charing x but that's such a distance from me.

Pompey, it's still early days so don't panic. Hope it lessens for you though as it's very tiring bleeding all the time. Hope you're not in any pain.
My numbers have gone up from 81 to 179 so going in to charing x on Thursday for tests and treatment if needed. Strange thing to come to terms with but don't feel as worried as I expected. X

Aw Hels I am so so sorry to hear this. I was feeling really positive about all of us and I am so sorry that you have gone up. Did you hear the news today? Are you far from charing cross? I hope you are ok and I am sending you virtual hugs and I will keep you in my thoughts.

I am in NI so would be a trek for me too Pompey but I have heard that sometimes you can get the second lot of treatment from your local dr, if they agree, if you have to travel a distance. Try not to worry but if it gets worse maybe ring your GP? I got diagnosed with the molar on Wednesday and got my first pack on the Monday, if that helps?

Rosie I actually laughed out loud when I read your post! seriously?!? Honestly sometimes people can be so I insensitive! Delighted you are down to 25. That's brilliant news and January will come around quickly.

Kitty I also have a little one my daughter is 25mths, I also like you, planned a smaller gap and came off the pill at the end of last august but early September found out I had had an abnormal smear and needed a colposcopy which was in Oct and couldn't TTC until December. My husband is a chef so December is a busy time for him so it was Jan before we got any 'quality' time together and then this happened. Lucy (my daughter) is great she is a wee pet put hard work too.

I haven't felt that great the last few days - I find my mood goes from be 'I'm ok, this will be ok' to being really low. My husband and I had a massive row during the week because stupidly last week when I was having a really low moment I smoked a cigarette. I stopped smoking about 5yrs ago, I wouldn't have actually gone out to buy them but there was a packet in a cupboard somewhere, someone had left behind after a party. I felt bad not telling him so I told him and he hit the roof. He is stressed with work and all of this too and I think I got it all. I previously stopped using the Allen Carr easyway and u did the course again today. I know it was not helping and I feel rubbish that I was so silly to think it would help. I just think I felt pretty desperate at times. I spoke to the GP before the weekend and he said they might do another d&c to remove the clot. It feels like it just is never ending at times but I know that it will be ok in the end. It's just hard to stay positive at times but I know this is probably natural.

I am going to see the bereavement midwife with the hospital this week, I thought it might help me get my head around everything. I think I was ok, initially when I found out I had miscarried but since then there have been so any emotional roller coasters that I think I could do which the extra support have any of you gone to anything like this?

I hope there aren't too many spelling/grammar/missed words in this but I have at little !

Hi oak thanks for your message, it is a very stressful time and very hard on partners too. We definitely found it tricky for a while but worked through it. I know what you mean about big ups and downs and of course it's only natural. It's frustrating when you don't know how long it's going to last or what's around the corner. I hate not being able to plan anything.
I found out on Friday but had pretty much figured out something was wrong anyway. I'll get a letter this week explaining what's to happen on Thursday apparently. I live in London so hoping I don't have to stay for very long. I feel okay at the moment and in some ways just want to get on a deal with it if that's what is necessary. Xx

Hi girls

Rosie - so glad you're down to 25 - almost there! Wasn't yours a PMP? As the guidance from Charing cross for PMP is only to wait four weeks after negative then one more negative then youre free to ttc. Could you perhaps discuss that with your Dr and come to a compromise? They are doing so much research at Charing Cross and they were the first place set up for molar pregnancies in the world so I do think other Drs would take note. Just a thought. I don't think its silly that you feel nervous to ask your Dr sooner though, that's only natural, I would too. I'm sure he or she will listen to your thoughts though and your husband can back you up. Can't believe your coworker! What a silly thing to say! I've had reactions like, 'but that's so weird, how strange that that can happen' which did nothing for my freak complex but antioxidants! I guess people are at a loss with what to say sometimes.

Pompey I'm really sorry about your bleeding. I hope you do get registered with charing cross quickly - once that happened for me it was much easier, they are really knowledgable and supportive.

oak - its tough on a little one isn't it? I'm sure your daughter is doing great but its hard feeling like you failed to give them a sibling when you wanted to. I know we both will soon but it doesn't make this part any easier. I could've been reading my own post when I read about you smoking! I did the same! I quit about 4 years ago but got so stressed about all this I took it up again for a week. Probably only smoked about 5 in total but I was desperate and it makes me feel better. I told my husband beforehand and he was ok about it but I felt so guilty and annoyed with myself. But in that moment I felt I needed it. I haven't smoked or thought about it since and it think we should be easy on ourselves- this is incredibly traumatic and very rare. It's hard to know what to feel and how to cope with the mix of emotions and all this information. If it made you feel better at a very difficult time then it's not the worst thing in the world. Well done for trying the Allen Carr again. Don't beat yourself up - you've been really strong already. Plenty of people would've done a lot worse in your situation. Hang in there. Hope you're doing ok.

Hels I'm so sorry your number went up and you might need treatment. Hopefully if you do it'll only take the low risk treatment and will be quite quick to get you to zero. I went to the charing cross patient group yesterday. It was good but as they were holding it on a different day there were quite a few people that couldn't be there including patient speakers and the counsellor. There was no new information really but it was nice to speak to the team there and meet others in the same situation. The team were fantastic and so knowledgeable so you'll be in really good hands if you do need treatment. I hope you're doing ok. We're here for you and feel free to send me a private message if you want my number or email address for extra support. This will be ok in the end, it's just not quite the end yet. I'll be thinking of you. Xxx

Hope everyone's ok.

Xx

Kitty Yep, I had a PMP- I think I will try to talk to my doctor after my first negative reading. I wonder if she knows about charing cross and their research or if she's just going by some old book somewhere that she had to dig out when I came around. I am nervous about what could be but, I guess I need to just get through each day as it comes. Uhg, and I was noticing all the round bellies out and about this weekend again...

I hope the patient group was helpful yesterday! I don't know anyone IRL who has had this. Was it comforting to talk to the other girls? Seems surreal sometimes to have this thing that no one else really know about. How are you holding up? You get your next results in this week right? I just know that they will be negative and we will have to host a virtual graduation on here for you!

Pompey I'm so so sorry you're going through this. It sounds like you are having the same kind of bleeding I had. It lasted for about a week and contained tissue or clots that I've never seen before. I was so anxious about it and didn't really know what to expect. Every twinge I felt or any cramp I had convinced me that I was having a regrowth of tissue. Once the bleeding finally stopped I calmed down a bit. I hope that your specialist will help to ease your nerves and that the bleeding stops soon. How are you holding up? The first month of this was definitely the worst for me. Mood swings and terrible sadness along with confusion and worry. Its very difficult and I hope you have someone to lean on to help you through all of this. We are here for you anytime!!

Oak I agree with Kitty, I think now is a time to take it easy on yourself. Please don't feel like you failed because you had a cigarette. I was never a smoker but I have been partaking a bit extra in some vino some nights. I kinda felt like even though I should continue to take care of myself and health and yadda yadda that its ok to just let go a little and myself. I'm pretty healthy in general so, if I want that extra glass or two (or four) of wine then right now I have zero reason to feel guilty. I'm sure your husband is just as stressed about this and maybe the argument wasn't totally based on one cigarette. I think the men may not really have a grasp on how awful this is to go through mentally and probably feel helpless when it comes to dealing with this.

I'm sorry you're feeling down lately. I agree with Kitty that I could be reading my own post when you said that. Some days I am feeling so hopeful and optimistic and that this is just my journey. Then the next day I am so fed up with everything my job, my life, the thought of even trying to get pregnant again is so scary it's laughable. I have been doing better this past couple of weeks though and I hope that you will feel better soon too. Every day is not great but they aren't as dark as they were a month ago. p.s. I'm glad that the berries story gave you a laugh! I couldn't believe my ears at the time but it gave me a laugh too. :)

Hels Big ginormous virtual hug going out to you, sweet girl. I am so sorry your numbers went up. I hope the treatment works quickly since you are so low now and that everything will be wiped out soon. It sounds like charing cross is the place to be if you have had a molar pregnancy so you will be in good hands. I hope that your family and friends are surrounding you with love and support right now. I'm sending out good thoughts and prayers for you, my friend. I really hope that you're doing as well as possible, big hug, and same here if you want to reach out for email etc. I'm here.

I hope everyone is ok and you were able to have a good weekend! The weather here was beautiful and I was out and about with my girlfriends all weekend (husband off on a guys trip) and it was a great way to blow off some steam.

Hey Rosie. Oh good thought it was a PMP- I definitely think you should discuss the info from charing cross with your dr. After all, if you were over here you would only have a few weeks to go till you could ttc again providing it keeps dropping at the same rate (I'm sure it will-25 is so close now). I'm sure the staff at charing cross would be happy to email you their follow up guidance for PMP - I can send you their contact details if you like or I think they're available on the charing cross mole website. They are currently looking at some data and said they think they will be able to shorten the follow up time for a complete soon too for what its worth to anyone. Also the lady I spoke to said your risk of any re growth after hitting zero with a PMP is about 1/9000 or something so very low. I hope your dr lets you off the hook sooner. You could even be pregnant again in the next few months! Trying again is a scary thought though, isn't it? I know what you mean. I feel quite anxious about the whole process.

I got my results yesterday and I'm finally at zero so only one more urine sample to do now and no more bloods. Really pleased and feeling very lucky to have gotten off so lightly in the end.

Glad you had a good weekend and you were able to enjoy yourself. Sounds lovely. I so know what you mean about noticing all the bellies. I worked out that I see about 5-10 heavily pregnant women a day. Ouch. I just know my best friend is going to tell me she's pregnant very soon too as I know she's trying and it was very quick for her last time. I know it's going to kill me. But as my husband says it doesn't change what we're trying to do and it has no impact on our ability to have a healthy baby one day. Wouldn't it be nice to fast forward to that time?! I really enjoyed my first pregnancy and I feel like all of this has taken the joy out of it and I'd just be in a permanent state of anxiety if I got pregnant again!

Hels - think you were going in today? Or finding out more? Hope you're ok.

oak and pompey - thinking of you both too.

Xxxx

Kitty I am soooo soo happy that you hit zero!!!! Finally reaching that goal must be such a relief after such an awful journey. Are you celebrating?? I think you deserve a party. I'm glad you feel that you've gotten off lightly, I wouldn't say that since dealing with this is no walk in the park even if you do get a negative result without treatment.

I would really like to see the research from charing cross (I'll PM you my email) I've been on their website before and I'm not sure I'm seeing the research you're referring to. the 1/9000 stat is pretty reassuring! I would like to have as much information with me as possible when I talk to my doctor about the wait time. Charing cross really says only 4 weeks for a PMP? I was talking to a friend who had a miscarriage and she said that she wished she would have let herself be happy and excited in the beginning of her next pregnancy. She also has a friend who went through a molar pregnancy who has a happy healthy 4 month old now! So, maybe my/your/everyone's next pregnancy doesn't have to be so scary...

It sounds like even if your close friend has an announcement soon that you might be in the same boat not too long from now yourself! I know you will get pregnant again and even if you're scared, everything will be ok. There are so many success stories out there for women like us. I know it will be hard to hear a pregnancy announcement from someone so close (I've kinda been fearing one from my brother and sis-in-law) but I think from everything you've written here that you're a very sweet and supportive person. You will be able to handle it and take it in stride, I just know it! And, if your first reaction is jealousy and a bit of sadness, I wouldn't beat yourself up too much about it. That is a natural reaction after losing a baby of your own and even more, I would say, after this crap bucket you've been dealing with. I really hope that everything goes smoothly for you and you're able to conceive easily and can have a sibling for your daughter by this time next year!

Girl, seriously...so happy for you!!

hels pompey oak this will be us soon too! fx for you ladies, I'm thinking of ya!

FFS I had emergency surgical assistance to remove 'products of conception of a suspected partial molar' on 30/05 and told some one would call me the week after. No call, so I called a week later and was told it can take a couple of weeks for the results to come back - so I called today (17 days later) and have been told it can take 6-weeks.

I really want to know! I feel like my life is on-hold.

Jenni Sorry to hear that - it's so horrible being in limbo and not knowing what's happening. Do you know where your tissue is being analysed? As mine took 7 weeks at the local hospital who told me it was a complete molar but then once Charing Cross (specialist centre for Southern England) got the sample, it took them only about a week and they confirmed it was a partial, not complete. Have you been registered to have blood tests? I really hope it wasn't a molar at all, local hospitals can get it wrong a lot as they don't see molars often and they're not experts. I have a friend who was told she had a molar then Charing Cross analysed it and it wasn't. And when I went there they told me that it often happened that suspected partial molars turned out to be normal miscarriages and not partial molars at all. Fingers crossed for you. Sorry you're having to wait. The anticipation is probably worse - at least once you know you can start to move forward either way. It's hard carrying on as normal when things are so uncertain and all you want is to try to get pregnant again. This group is really supportive so let us know how you get on. xoxo

Jenni, I am so sorry for your loss. I know you must be feeling panicked right now, it is awful news to receive on top of having lost your baby. This group of ladies are definitely a great comfort to me and I hope that we can help you out too.

I'm not sure how the process goes over there but, from what others have shared so far it seems that charing cross is the place to contact in this situation. Maybe you should give them a call and they can help figure out what is going on. Can you at least request a blood test to check you hcg levels? That is a huge indicator for someone who has had a molar pregnancy. I've heard some of the ladies saying they went to a private doctor to have the test, if I were you, I might do that to ease your mind. Maybe it wasn't a molar pregnancy at all and you can rule that out without waiting on lab tests.

Hang in there Jenni! We're here if you need us!!

Hi all, apologies for the sporadic messages. I've had my first week if methotrexate and have a had a few days off now. So happy to answer any questions on that.Can't recommend it as an experience and just adjusting to a different s l o w e r pace of life at the moment.

Jenni poor you, the whole thing is difficult as you feel so out of control. It's really good to be able to share it all with people who understand, and that's only really here since it's so rare. Good luck with getting some results very soon (it really shouldn't take so long).

Hels I'm so sorry you had to have methotrexate. Sounds like you're being very brave. Really hope you won't need much to take your numbers down to zero. How are you feeling in yourself? I imagine its very tough. I hope you've got some good friends and family around you to help you through this. I'm sure you'll be back to normality soon. Wishing you lots of luck with your treatment & I hope the symptoms aren't too tough. Do message me if you want to moan about it all - always here. Xxx

Jenni hope you've had some more information now and you don't have to keep waiting. It's horrible being stuck with all that uncertainty.

Hope everyone else is ok. Rosie - crossing my fingers that your numbers went down on Friday.

: ) xxx

Hi ladies, I've not posted for a long time, unfortunately I ended up needing methotrexate and didn't really feel able to put things into words at the time. I am sorry that you also all find yourselves here but it really is such a great support network, I was also very fortunate in that I met a few other ladies in hospital who were going through the same thing, it really does help to speak to others who understand.

Hels I hope that the treatment isn't giving you too many side effects, I found the first few cycles to be the worst and then I suppose I got used to the idea of it and my body also adjusted, totally get what you said about a slower pace of life I'm currently doing the reverse and trying to step things up again and get back to 'normal', I hope that your levels are responding well to treatment and that you don't have to have too many cycles, thinking of you.

Rosie I love your comment about when life gives you lemons buy expensive shoes, very true & good advice!! Hope your numbers are dropping x

Jenni hope that you get some results soon, I ended up waiting a long time for mine and didn't have any blood tests in the meantime due to a delay getting registered at charing cross. Perhaps you can ask your gp to arrange some blood tests in the meantime for peace of mind if nothing else, I wish I had pushed and done this as it would have highlighted things and got the ball rolling much sooner.

Fingers crossed for you all xxx

Hi ladies,

I've just found this thread which has been really useful.

I had what I thought was a missed miscarriage at the start of May followed by a erpc a few days later at 8.5 weeks. I was told at this time things were fine and that there was no reason to delay trying again. I did a pregnancy test post evacuation as a friend had been advised to do so. This came back negative 10 days after the procedure. I then had my period 10 days later.

I had a call 2 weeks ago to say that my histology had come back and that I'd had a complete molar pregnancy. Initially I was really freaked out reading online. I've since been in to talk with my local hospital and had blood taken and tested by charingx, which thankfully has come back normal. I'm now really struggling with the idea of having to wait 6 months and wondered what advise others had been given in this situation?

Thanks,
Amy

Hels, I'm so sorry you're going through that. Please know that we are all here for you! I hope you can adjust to the slower pace of life soon. Big hug to you lady.

Sunshine, I'm glad you felt able to come back to the forum and share your story and support. It's so helpful to hear from ladies who've been where we are and come out on the other side of this! And please do use this awful circumstance as the perfect excuse for expensive shoes ;)

Jennie, Hoping you were able to get some clarification! Hopefully you won't need us and the tests come back negative!

Kitty I dropped again slightly, but still a drop!

Hope you're doing well Oak and Pompey!!

Hello everyone, I've read all the messages on here looking for others experiences. I have had a rollercoaster 6 weeks and am barely getting my head around what's happening in my body.
I'm 47, 48 next week, so expected to be starting the menopause soon. I started bleeding on feb 27th and expected it to be a normal period, light and only lasting few days. I had been feeling sick for about 2 weeks before and period was 2 weeks late but didn't think for a moment I was pregnant, esp when bleeding started. It continued and continued and I stupidly ignored it for months until I finally went to the doctors on may 12th as I had started flooding. He referred me to see gynae on 2 week max emergency appointment and I got appointment for 23rd may and ultrasound for 21st may. at ultrasound nurse simply said something in womb that could be causing the bleeding. At gynae appointment he did internal and said mass approx. 16/18weeks size. I mentioned sickness that by then I had been having nearly every day but said not linked to see GP as separate issue. Said I would need hysteroscopy and MRI immediately, made me think I had cancer of the womb. On the following wed go call at work that I needed biopsy on the Friday again cancer ??
So went for hysteroscopy on 30th may. admitted at 7am had to do urine sample. At 7.30am nurse came back saying couldn't go ahead with it as I was pregnant!! Was massive shock. I kept saying surely I can't be with bleeding for 3 months etc and would have been picked up at ultrasound. Another pregnancy test done-positive, then blood test-positive. Had several nurses approach me to congratulate me. Saying to ring my partner to tell him exciting news and get him to collect me. I refused as not type of news to tell over phone! They said they would do an ultrasound to give me a due date. waited 4 hours on my own in hospital bed, actually excited, even at my age of having another baby. (I have 2 who are 19 and 22) Even though there were black doubts that it couldn't be alive I was hopefully stroking my tummy praying he/she was alive. When I finely went in for scan even the nurse in there had been told I was pregnant and was obviously mortified to have to tell me there was no heartbeat and no baby. I was in total shock and didn't really take in her talking about molar pregnancies etc. I returned to the ward and laid in bed trying to absorb what had happened that morning. I text my partner to come and get me. A registrar from EPU came to see me to explain more but didn't take it in. The nurses who had been congratulating me previously were coming back to say sorry. Partner arrived and I tried to explain to him. he was relieved not cancer but couldn't and still doesn't understand why I feel I've lost a baby when it was only cells and I didn't know I was pregnant and we didn't want a baby at our ages anyway!
I had to go home and return the next morning for an evacuation. Had it as first patient so I could be discharged by lunchtime, was still there at 7pm!! When I went into theatre the antithesis asked how did I not realise I was not pregnant?? I replied well my GP nor gynae did who are highly trained in medical matters didn't even when they knew my symptoms so why would a mere mortal like me!!?? Then surgeon came in and said he was very excited to be doing this procedure as never seen a molar pregnancy at 18 weeks as most miscarry before 6 weeks or are picked up in 12 week scan..... so pleased he was excited!!
I was signed off work for 2 weeks but emotions were all over the place and had another week off work as slightest thing would set me off and I have quite a stressful job dealing with the public and couldn't have coped with angry customers!
Last wed I got call from hospital saying complete molar and could I go in next day for blood test which I did.!19th june. Bleeding had gradually been tapering off and stopped same day.
Pack from CHX arrived at weekend to start blood/urine tests. very quick compared to what some of you have said on here.
Went back to work Monday. That night sitting in garden reading after a bath blood starting pouring out like a tap had been turned on. grabbed towel and shoved between legs to get to bathroom. in that time towel soaked. More poured down the loo, over floor etc. clots size of 50p pieces. when I'd cleaned myself and bathroom up I put in maternity pad (found them much better that normal types) and went downstairs. My poor partner was horrified at all the blood and insisted I rang CHX. Even though out of hours spoke to member of oncology team who wanted me to go into CHX immediately but I convinced them to let me go locally. I had to call an ambulance to take me. Stayed in overnight. My hcg was 10672. Retested next morning was 11494. They consulted with CHX who said to send me home as bleeding had stopped but to go back Thursday (tomorrow now) for another test if still high or gone up I would have to go to CHX to start chemo. been resting today but bleeding has started again and passed a massive clot. Will wait to see if I bleed more before I do anything but will pack a bag in case need to go into hospital again.
I had 2 very easy pregnancies and births and have never suffered with any PMT etc related to cycle so why now am I getting problems!!
Anyway better go and pack that bag just incase.
thank you to everyone on here for your stories. The best thing I have got from you is that its ok to cry and morn and its perfectly normal. xx