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Miscarriage/pregnancy loss

Find support and share your experiences on our Miscarriage forum. See also legal rights and support after baby loss.

Original poster

I'm miscarrying right now (mmc found out this morning) what can I expect? Scared.

106 replies

FoeufFighter · 06/04/2012 20:20

Went in for a scan this morning, 9 weeks today, bean measured 6 weeks and no heartbeat. Was booked in for repeat scan next Friday to check (cause a grown woman can't possibly know her blooming dates Hmm ) they didn't give me any info or advice on what to expect or what to do, who to call, stay at home, come into hospital, nothing.

I had a little bleeding brown and red last few days and now it's gone heavier and numerous large clots coming away. No pain as yet. have popped a couple of codeine, put on large thick pad, comfy leggings, sorted out my hot water bottle, had a bit to eat and got comfy with duvet on sofa.

What can I expect? I don't want my baby to go down the toilet Sad

OP posts:
mummyinspain · 06/04/2012 20:23

Sorry can't be of any real help, but I am sure someone will be along in a moment.

So Sorry for you loss

Calamityboo · 06/04/2012 20:23

Oh sweetheart, I am so sorry for you, have you anyone in rl you can call? Maybe the out of hours doctor. This will have av least bumped your thread, others will be more help than me.

Original poster
FoeufFighter · 06/04/2012 20:24

My partner is here with me, forgot to say that.

OP posts:
grimblesmother · 06/04/2012 20:26

Don't be scared, your body will do what it needs to do.

I've mc 3 times, all at 8-9 weeks. Each time I had pains, not regular but I suppose they were contractions of a sort. I crouched in the bath and when the baby came away it was unmistakable. Very tiny, a scrap of tissue really, with one of them I could identify a tiny sac about the size of a 10p piece.

I rinsed it and buried it in the garden a couple of days later.

I have found that people are reluctant to talk about what actually happens.

I'll be thinking of you.

Original poster
FoeufFighter · 06/04/2012 20:27

At 6 weeks where it stopped, will I actually see anything do you think? Am scared of wiping at it being in my hand :(

OP posts:
grimblesmother · 06/04/2012 20:28

If you're getting numerous large clots I would think it will happen within the next hour or two, although I only have my own experience of course.

Be kind to yourselves. It's bloody horrible, but it'll be over soon.

Unexpected3 · 06/04/2012 20:30

This reply has been withdrawn

This has been withdrawn due to privacy concerns

ValiumQueen · 06/04/2012 20:30

Oh foof I guessed this was you Sad

Your little one has probably passed already in one of the clots. It will be so very tiny that it will not be identifiable.

Make sure you keep the medics updated - I had a mmc and developed a dreadful infection as it had not cleared completely.

Thinking of you xx

TheScottishPlayer · 06/04/2012 20:32

So sorry to read you are going through this. It happened to me a few years ago.

I remember that I spent a few days not straying far from the bathroom and watched loads of trash telly/ dvd's (nothing that required engaging my brain), eating chocolate, drinking wine and bursting into tears at random moments. The pain was manageable with lots of codeine (like really really bad period pains) and I did pass lots of clots for a day or two.

The thing that amazed me was only discovering how many people I knew that it had happened to once it happened to me.

It's a horrible, painful time and you should take time to grieve for your loss.

But, one day the sun will shine a little brighter for you.

Take care.

grimblesmother · 06/04/2012 20:32

Sorry, x-post.

I imagine it might be a scrap of tissue, as mine were? I don't know, but don't be scared. You're going through the worst bit, you'll be relieved when it happens. You may wipe and find it in your hand, but it won't be grotesque, honestly.

I have to get ds up to bed, I'll check back in a bit.

In my thoughts.

Original poster
FoeufFighter · 06/04/2012 20:33

i've just put kungfu panda on to distract me

OP posts:
TheScottishPlayer · 06/04/2012 20:38

Sorry if this is tmi - but I could soon 'tell' if I was going to pass a clot, so didn't have to deal with wiping it with tissue.

Springforward · 06/04/2012 20:40

I have had two miscarriages around 6 weeks and could not identify the baby amongst the clots, unfortunately, like Valiumqueen said.

Be kind to yourself these next few days. I'm so sorry for your loss.

Original poster
FoeufFighter · 06/04/2012 20:43

I'm reassured to hear I shouldn't see the baby at all, but why do i feel guilty for thinking that ffs? Going to log off and watch a bit of TV, getting a bit crampy now.

Will probably be back later as doubt i will get much sleep done

OP posts:
OhDoAdmitMrsDeVere · 06/04/2012 20:47

I am sorry Sad

You might get diarreaha (sorry cant spell it). That worried me but the nurses were unconcerned so I am guessing its not unusual.
I lost a baby at 8 weeks and I didnt see anything.

Take care of yourself x

Calamityboo · 06/04/2012 20:53

You sound like you have all the right advice on here, I didn't want to log off without saying again how sorry I am that you have to go through this. Look after yourself as best you can, be kind to yourself and take support from all these wonderful ladies and your RL support too. My thought are with you.

Original poster
FoeufFighter · 06/04/2012 21:41

Kung Fu Panda isn't working too well I have to say. Feeling increasingly crampy now but not passed more clots since before. Sitting with a hottie on my belly which is helping a bit.

OP posts:
Original poster
FoeufFighter · 06/04/2012 22:15

And I have just realised I haven't thanked you all Blush how rude of me, thank you for sharing your stories with me

OP posts:
ChippingInNeedsCoffee · 06/04/2012 22:22

Foeuf - so sorry to hear you are going through this :(

Please don't feel guilty for being relieved that you (probably) wont see anything, that's really 'normal'.

I wish this hadn't happened, but now it has, I hope it is over for you soon. Look after yourself x

PestoPenguin · 06/04/2012 22:24

First time there was nothing except bleeding and a few clots for me. Second time, there were littlt tiny 'bits', a litttle like tiny bits of wet tissue paper. The GP warned me about those. Nothing was at all identifiable, and it wasn't shocking (well no more so than the general horrendousness of the whole thing Sad).

Be gentle with yourself

TheScottishPlayer · 06/04/2012 22:39

I hope you manage to get some sleep OP. and I hope you and your DH/DP have some good RL support. It's easy to forget the dads in these situations.

Keep posting of you find yourself awake and it helps. Off to bed myself, but the great thing is on here is that someone somewhere is usually still up.

Original poster
FoeufFighter · 06/04/2012 23:20

OH has just nipped to Asda for juice and hot cross buns so I've something to nibble on in the night if I'm up. His mum just popped up on her way home from a day out to see if we're ok or need anything and he nearly cried bless him. Showed her the scan picture, just wish it was as clear as it was on the big screen we saw it on, could see the head shape.

Going to try and get some sleep shortly but thank you again means a lot x

OP posts:
grimblesmother · 06/04/2012 23:23

You'll be fine FF, trust your body.

As someone said, if you find yourself up and about in the darkest small hours there'll be someone about on here Smile

StateofConfusion · 06/04/2012 23:31

im so sorry FF i had a mmc at 3 1/2mnths pregnant at christmas, its utterly draining.

Ive no advice on your situation as i had to have an ERPC as my body wouldnt let go.

take care, take painkillers and stay warm xxxx

TheDetective · 06/04/2012 23:32

Foofy :( I am so so sorry, I really don't want this to be happening for you.

I have no words of advice - I have never experienced a miscarriage. But what I do know is that if your baby stopped growing at 6 weeks, you will be unlikely to see anything among the clots. I hope if the clots have slowed down, that you are now through the worse.

I'm going to miss you :( Sending lots of thoughts your way. And get some wine down your neck when that codeine wears off. xxx