Recurrent Buns - Miscarriage Testing and Beyond! Part three..!

[Julezboo]

Not so imaginative as lunatic !

Part One HERE

Part Two HERE

There are a mixture of Pg ladies, new BFP's (YAY) and new ladies who have sadly had to join us and are going through testing. Lots of OMW's and hand holding here!

Sit down, grab a cushion and a hot choc and get comfortable.

[ALovelyBunchOfCoconuts]

lulu Looking back at your results you posted up, that is a strange ratio for PCOS. Usually the LH is more than double if not three times as high as the FSH, which yours is not. I'm not sure what the apa is that digi has mentioned so I will look that up.

You didn't have a period for a year? I'm currently on 6months, only just been diagnosed after 5 years of problems so it is a relief to me to know I now have options. It's just a case now of getting my awful doctors to move forward.

My book does cover diet, I just haven't got that far yet!

Good Snowy morning to everyone else. Be careful on your feet. DD is very excited so I will be venturing out at some point to let her enjoy it for the first time :) (for the record I hate the stuff...)

[lulu1414]

Hi there- just a thought... as it happens, I had the tests in the middle of my cycle. I'm pretty sure I ovulated either the day or the day after they did the test. Do you think that could be it?

coconuts yes it was a year of not having a period. They just never returned after my ERPC. I was ignored for ages until I eventually pushed to get seen. The first doc diagnosed Asherman's- I asked for a second opinion as he barely looked at me before diagnosing this. I went to a brilliant fertility doc privately who diagreed with Asherman's after an in-depth scan and who did many tests and diagnosed PCO. He prescribed clomid. I was on that for 6 months. Still barely anything and so I eventually had surgery. Periods returned after the surgery and I got pregnant 4 months later. I was also terribly, terribly depressed and stressed about it all so I'm sure that played a role. Since my daughter was born no probs getting pregnant, just problems sustaining a pregnancy (I've been pregnant 3 times this year). I know what you mean- it is exhausting constantly pushing to get answers. For me I got very lucky that I eventually found a brilliant GP and things moved forward from there (once I collapsed in tears in her office!)

[ALovelyBunchOfCoconuts]

lulu yes I think I might have to get the tears out soon

You sound very similar to me, just the other way around. I have a 2.7yo DD and had two mcs before her. No problems getting pregnant, just sustaining it. My periods haven't come back after coming off the pill to TTC#2. I have seen four different GPs and it was the last one that pushed for tests but now I've been diagnosed she doesn't want to know. I pushed for a gynae referral so hopefully that'll be my foot in the door. I know what treatment I need and I know what can be done to help but it just depends on what the doctors want to do.

Can I borrow your GP?!

Considering Asherman's is quite rare it does get brought up quite a bit. mummyabroad / mummyinengland is our resident expert :)

[ALovelyBunchOfCoconuts]

Oh and yes the tests should have been done on the 2nd or 3rd day of your cycle I think. Mine weren't and my LH was still double the FSH.

[lulu1414]

coconut- we do seem similar. my DD is 2.2 yo. When I first came off the pill to ttc it took 4 or 5 months to get a period. Then I got pg right away. I wish you could borrow my GP. I LOVE her. It makes it more difficult to be living abroad when I had such good care at home, but since I am still paying NI and only stopped work I think it would be OK to come back to the UK to see her. Where are you based?

Asherman;s does come up alot. I was sure I had it and was relieved when the doc diagnosed it, but just got a bad feeling from him. My second expert was so much better, but I still suspect the ERPC had scarred me since I only got back on track after they did the surgery. I must admit I am now totally fearful of ERPC- I had a medical management fr my second miscarriage and let the third happen naturally.

[ALovelyBunchOfCoconuts]

I am in South Lincolnshire. How about you? I often wonder if I have any scarring from my ERPC. My first mc was natural at 13 weeks and the second one was mmc at 7 weeks but I didn't find out until 10 weeks and then had the ERPC. Personally I preferred the ERPC. I found it gave me more closure knowing for sure it was all over and that I could try and move on. Obviously it is different for each individual.

[batteryhen]

Hello everyone - again...! big wave to everyone :)

Can I ask a question please?I had my erpc 5 weeks ago and started spotting on thursday - had ususal period pains etc,and am now having AF which started yesterday. The problem is it is really really light. I usually am very light anyway but this is non existant really. Of course I have now self diagnosed myself as having ashermans which I don't think is the case -but you know how it is....damn google!
I would appreciate any pearls of wisdom please :) xx thanks in advance xx

[hairytriangle]

Hi Battery I'm pretty sure I've read that the first period may well be lighter. Worth googling?

I read up about Ashermans and was bricking it yesterday :( I really shouldn't read so much when I feel low!

x

[batteryhen]

hairy I know what you mean - there is nothing like self diagnosis when you are feeling crap anyway. There is nothing like googling all my ailments on a saturday night whilst wathing strictly and stuffing chocolate into my mouth :(

Hope you are bearing up too xx

[Julezboo]

Just a quickie

lunatic thanks for asking. I am ok, pain is just a dull ache now, it comes and goes tbh, flares up and its agony, when its a dull ache I can cope. I will no doubt be reduced to tears at my appt on monday to see if they can do something to help me sooner than Friday.

Car failed its MOT. £380 plusVAT to repair, just what we needed! DH has made a start on boys bedroom whilst I slobbed out in the bath after we had a huge row :(

Just generally feeling very low and sad recently. And I Feel like im not entitled to given what some people are going through.

Friend of mine is having a rough time. Her waters started leaking at 16 weeks, shes made it to 28 weeks but has had a battle on her hands for the docs to do anything. Now shes been contracting for two days but not dilating and has spent her and her dd's birthday 60 miles away from home. Alone. Wish I was well enough to go see her. She is in swansea now but I cant do the drive unfortunately. She doesnt think she will hopldon much longer then her precious baby will have a fighton her hands as waters have been low for so long...

[hairytriangle]

Oh Battery you are so right. Thurs night I was convinced I had lupus/sticky blood (due to clotty periods) and last night it was Ashermans, and I really freaked out as I hadn't heard of it before I had the ERPC (or the failed one!)

I'm bearing up. Had to walk past Mothercare today and burst into tears, as I was in there a few weeks ago looking for stretchy trousers thinking 'not long til I can start buying stuff for the baby' and now look at me :(

Went to see my lovely 37 weeks pregnant sister today so that was lovely, she had problems conceiving and a mmc before 'getting lucky', so is so incredibly understanding, also saw my sil a couple of days ago and she's the saem - had a mmc between her first and second children (she has four!).

[hairytriangle]

Oh Julez sorry you're feeling low. We are all fighting our own seperate battles, no-one is here to judge about who is suffering 'worse' - we are all suffering in our own way.

[Brokenbits]

Just a quickie, complete with an apology. Have been deliberately keeping myself busy the past couple of days and I've never known time to drag sooooo much! Having a quiet night with DH tonight but promise to do a proper catch up asap.

Before I toddle off, just wanted to say I have no idea what the 'foot in it' moment was that you referred to Lunatic! Stop giving yourself unnecessary concerns on top of everything else!

Bye for now. Sorry for no name checking tonight. X

[lulu1414]

Lunatic he put me on 75mg every day. I lost the tablets, so oculd only get 100mg, but he said that was fine.

Battery I'm pretty sure the first one is often lighter because the womb lining hasn't had time to thicken.

LAF I can realise sympathise- I was feeling so, so sick for the past few days, but now nothing. I'm starting to worry...

[ALovelyBunchOfCoconuts]

battery I'm pretty sure the first one is usually quite light. I don't think it's cause for concern.

lunatic I know how you feel. I'm so pale but have only ever been anaemic when I was pregnant. I have these massive black bags under my eyes that I can't get rid of just because my skin is so white I hate it.

Hope you aren't getting another cold. I think I might be getting one, my throat has been very sore the past couple of days and I keep sniffing.

julez that's rubbish about your car. That's alot of money. you have just reminded me that me and DH haven't had a good row in a while...

I hope your friend is ok :(

You are as 'entitled' as any of us to feel low. Nobody's problems are worse than anybody else's. I often feel the way you feel if it's any consolation but I'm not very good at listening to my own advice.

Waves to broken, hairy and lulu

Wonders where sunny is....

All normal my end, apart from my impending cold and the crapola snow. It is -6 where I am and even my central heating isn't having an effect.
Had another bad night with DD. Got a new upstairs neighbour (I'm in the middle of a 3 flat house) and she is the most noisiest, elephant footed person ever. She came down her stairs (right next to DD's bedroom) slamming all doors at 1am consequently waking DD up so I pulled her into bed with us [bad mummy] and it took her over an hour to go back to sleep. Not sure whether I should say something? The old neighbours were never that loud and there were 2 of them and a baby.

[hairytriangle]

on the aspirin issue: do you take it only after you conceive, or do you take it anyway?

[digitalgirl]

Feeling very low today. Still not ovulated and it's been 4 weeks since I passed the sac.

Had the structural surveyor round this morning to show us the plans he's drawn up for our loft conversion. It's just made me so upset thinking about how we want to spend all this money to get an extra bedroom for a child we may never have. I was trying to think optimistically and get it organised before I got pregnant so that i wouldn't have the stress of it whilst pg. Now I'm thinking it's a massive massive gamble. We could happily live in a 2 bed house with one child.

hairy I was advised to take aspirin from bfp, not before. But that's because I haven't been diagnosed with anything yet. If they can't find a reason for mc then taking aspirin is no more effective than a placebo.

[ALovelyBunchOfCoconuts]

digi I'm in a similar position. We currently live in a 2 bed. We are moving in the new year hopefully, and are stuck on the decision of moving to a 3 or sticking with a 2. We could be paying more rent for a 3 bed that we'll never need.

[hairytriangle]

oh digi so sorry you are feeling low. but thank you for the advice.

I have actually not cried all day so far today - first time in about two weeks, since finding out the bad news.

I feel a little more hopeful today. I've spent the day sorting out the house in a massive cleaning and tidying frenzy and we have lit the real fire for the first time :)

[Brokenbits]

Right, epic catch up time...

frazzled The paranoia has well and truly hit. I've only done a week and I'm already desperately hopeful one second and terrified the next. I'm not sure how my legs will carry me into the hospital to have a scan. This HAS to work this time. I don't think I could take anymore grief.

I'm glad the funeral went as well as it possibly could, despite the stupidly insensitive comment about sons. Have to say I disagree. Girls want their Mums but boys always need their Mums if my own limited experience with boyfriends is anything to go by. Any sign of the oven? Hope it gets sorted soon. It will be worth it in the end. Easy for me to say, I know, but it does seem to be a fitting mantra generally for this thread.

Lunatic My other boob has now joined the party. It's only really noticeable if I have a good prod , but I've reached the point where non-stop trips to the loo is not cutting it in terms of believeing this is real yet, so I'm probably just making stuff up. With DS, I was puking my head off, pretty much from the outset. I'd almost feel comforted by that, although I'm a lot less anxious about having a baby this time around, so the majority of the sickness could have been anxiety related. I actually feel insanely well, which is worrying me. 2 weeks to go. I can't believe how slowly the time is dragging.
How are you doing? Iron perking you up? Hope the discomfort is easing a bit too. I'm most impressed at you handing over the OPKs and HPTs by the way. Talk about strength! Sorry to hear about the ear infection. Never rains but it pours (or snows) eh?

mumatron I have no idea what a cosmofer transfusion is I'm afraid! Hope it goes well, regardless.

banana Have you had another scan yet? Glad your consultant was able to alleviate your biggest fears. Would be good if AF would clear everything out. Much less traumatic than further procedures. Fingers crossed for you.

Coconuts We have a choose and book system at my hospital too, but I was pleasantly surprised to get an appt very quickly. All in, it's taken me about 5 months to get seen and treated which, historically, seems really good, but at the time it was the longest wait of my life. We do have a maximum referral time here though, so not sure if that made it a bit easier for me. The best of British luck to you. Make sure you take a list of questions with you when you see the gynae, so you don't leave with unanswered issues.

LAF Like you, I spend much of my time thinking there is no live baby in there and that it's not going to happen. I'm also trying to take one day at a time without going too insane and hoping and praying that this is my turn, so to speak. I haven't told anyone in RL yet apart from my DH and lovely sister. I simply don't trust my Mum to keep quiet. I know that sounds awful, but if I tell her it mustn't go any further, she'll tell someone else the same thing and then probably blab. She has a slight problem in terms of social etiquette too. I've endured a couple of absolutely cringeworthy occasions where she's told our hairdresser and the woman from whom we rented a holiday cottage about my miscarriage. I can't bear the thought of telling her, then miscarrying and discovering she's told half the family again. Frankly, I doubt I'd ever forgive her. I don't think she has any comprehension of how scared I really am.

Welcome lulu although I'm afraid I can't be of any help. Hopefully the other ladies here will have a better idea in terms of advice.

hairy Great news on the referral!

battery I think anything goes with the first period, but your lining should be thinner after an ERPC so lighter sounds perfectly normal to me.

Julez Sounds like you are having a rubbish time. It's hard to avoid rows when you are at such a low ebb. Hang on in there though. You don't have too much longer to go. Sorry about your friend. However, it's virtually impossible for you to 'be there' for her right now. You have a battle of your own to deal with. I know it's awful, but you need to focus on you right now. With the best will in the world, you won't be able to change her situation. I appreciate that is no comfort though. Hugs.

digi I'm so sorry you're feeling so low. It's such a shitty situation and if I could wave a magic wand for you, I so would. Also completely understand your feelings about the loft conversion. Is there any chance you could label the room something else for now? Maybe 'the study' or 'the den' or similar. I know you will always know that it's going to be for a another baby, but there's nothing to stop you from enjoying your home and the added space and value you'll get from an extra room. Having said that, I'd feel exactly the same as you if it was me. Hugs.

Hope that's everyone?

Having a bit of a weird day. I thought I'd feel a bit less hostile towards my pg friend once I'd got pregnant but, if anything, I find her news even more irritating now. She's just announced it on fb and keeps sending me texts every day under the guise of caring about my apparent infertility, but really just to complain about her pg symptoms and the fact that she can't take remedies for her illnesses because of it. I am now seriously questioning her motives. I'm trying to give her the benefit of the doubt in the sense that she's missing being able to talk to her best friend about her pg, but there's just such an air of attention seeking and I cannot work out why on earth she would consider me to be the right audience for moaning about her pg. Frankly, I think it's downright nasty to complain about something she knows I've desperately longed for so long and that she thinks I can't have.

I've decided to keep my news private for as long as I possibly can, even after a (hopefully) positive scan - and this is the really horrible, bitchy bit - to see if she really does care about my situation or if she's actually enjoying being smug about hers. Right now, I can't help but feel it's the latter. I know this is probably 110% hormones taking, but we've been here before. She got pg with her 1st child a few weeks before me and I can't decide whether it's me just feeling plain jealous about it all, or whether she's making me feel like I'm in a make believe race that I want no part of.

I've just read that back and it sounds like the evil ramblings of a deranged lunatic. I don't want to feel this way, but after her questionable behaviour surrounding her pg announcement - having told me she was back on the pill - I'm struggling to know how to feel.

Hopefully, I'll stop being such a cowbag and feel better if/when I see a hb. I'm not sure how I'll feel if this one goes wrong too. Thanks, as ever, for putting up with my ranting!

[banana87]

Hi all!

Trying to catch up, sorry if I miss anyone!

digital Sorry you are feeling low :( Wish I could say or so something to make you feel better.

Hairy I was told to take aspirin from BFP then another gynae said from 6 weeks...

Battery Most of my periods after ERPC have been really really light.

LunaticFringe Hope you start feeling better soon.

Julez What crap about your car, I have a very love-hate relationship with cars!

Broken Fingers crossed you see a hb soon and get some more reassuring symptoms!

I had another scan today. She spent a considerable amount of time looking. She said it could either be retained products or Gestational Trophioblastic Disease. She then sent me for HCG bloods. I really do not think it could be the latter because my tissue was sent off and determined not to be a molar pregnancy. Also, they saw a heartbeat three times. Can retained tissue form a molar pregnancy??? Really confused, scared, and hoping my consultant calls me soon.

[MummyinEngland]

Hi ladies!
Just got back from visiting relatives in Kent, lovely trip but about ten degrees too cold for me...

Lulu welcome, sorry you find yourself here. Sounds like you have really been through the mill I have just had surgery for ashermans with doctor lower in London. I got the most amazing support and advice from the yahoo support group which you access through www.ashermans.org. Have you seen it? I would really recommend you have a look (and battery and hairy too) hearing the word ashermans was the scariest thing ever for me, i kept finding out bits about it and then avoiding finding anymore because it was just too terrifying. It doesnt help that there is so much conflicting information from doctors and a lot gloom and doom (I have been told by lots of doctors that it is incurable - it is not) I think you really must bear in mind that lots of doctors are poorly informed about AS you really must get info from someone who is a
specialist in this area. The ladies on yahoo keep lists
of docs details for both private and nhs patients as well as info about treatments given during pregnancy after
AS. There are also many many success stories of
women who have successful pregnancies after AS,
which might give you more confidence by the way bleeding in pregnancy after AS is quite common, and Does not necessarily mean anything is wrong.

an Interesting aside, on this site I found out lots of women take low dose aspirin after surgery and while ttc in order to improve the womb lining. (banana* 10mm is great!
Mine is only 3!) There are a few studies to support this
but I haven't actually read them myself yet.

Hairy excellent news on your referral!!
pregnant ladies gosh aren't there a lot of you now? big squeeze for each of you, i hope I will get a bit more time for catch up later. Xxx