mumatron Hoorah! At last! Gorgeous name. Your little girl weighs half an ounce less than my DS did and I thought he was a little chubster. Did you get your water birth in the end? I really hope you did, but the main thing is not how she got here but that she's here. Congratulations!!!!! Bet you're exhausted! 
It's only just hit me that people on this thread are actually having their babies. A small, worried part of me wondered if that would ever happen. It's the same bit of me that feels like hitting delete everytime I type the word pregnant in relation to myself and uttering it aloud feels positively fraudulent. Whenevr other pregnant people talk about their experience I find myself STILL thinking 'Maybe it'll be my turn soon'. I've been unable to get pregnant for so long that I find it impossible to believe.
Julez Oh yes. Your turn next. Hope you are feeling as okay as you can be at this stage.
LAF Thanks for coming back and venting here. If nothing else, it helps to just rant about the sheer, bloody injustice of it all. It's so hard to try and get through your grief at the same time as worrying about how everyone else is reacting to you. As Mummy said, it is bad enough to go through this once. I can't begin to imagine going through it 3 times. You need to cut yourself some slack and accept that you can't be superwoman in terms of coping right now, and nor should you try to be.
I'm actually physically appalled at your treatment at the EPU and I'd be inclined to write a very stern letter with exactly what you've put here. I wouldn't sugarcoat it either. Copy and paste what you've said about the humiliation and the upset. It must have been unbelievably awful for you to even entertain the idea of going back there so soon after your loss and they need to know how unprofessional and hideously insensitive they have been. Not only do you deserve much better care and support, but making you feel that you're wasting their time after they've asked you to go is just atrocious. We all know how hard these appts are to face and anyone in that line of work shouldn't be allowed to do that job without having a bit more sensitivity. I'm fuming for you.
On the upside, I'm glad you got a follow-up appt. I'm sure it's the last thing you want to face right now, but don't immediately discount it, as you may feel quite different in a couple of months in terms of what you can cope with. The fact that they keep making you so sad and angry might be the incentive you need to speak your mind to someone who might actually listen. I know exactly where you're coming from with the anger that you should have been coming home with a picture of your baby today and instead you've been made to feel terrible on top of your loss. It's enough to make you want to go private for everything, isn't it?
Hooray for your GP though, and at least you'll receive better care at St. Mary's. It couldn't get any worse than it has been already.
Keep talking to your DH. Yes, he's struggling to know what to do for the best, but he might benefit from you explaing your feelings instead of worrying about him worrying about you. Ultimately, you don't need to put on a brave face for each other and, after so much heartbreak, I think you're entitled to have a good shout and a ball every now and again. Men can't possibly begin to understand how this feels for a woman, but they can surprise us in terms of their coping skills when you least imagine they will. He doesn't want you to be sad, but neither would he want you to bottle up your feelings and struggle either on your own or further down the line.
Sending you both much love and I so wish that anything we could say or do would help. I hope you get your answers soon. How long will it take for your referral to come through?