Left the job I love due to the menopause :(

[Greaselightening]

I can't believe it. I've left a job I love due to crippling anxiety from the the menopause. I feel so empty inside 😞

This thread is very helpful. I’m on HRT and AD’S and am really struggling with anxiety. I have had work stress recently though which hopefully is now resolved. Worrying about needing a hysterectomy now though as well. Will find out in January if I do. It’s nice to know you’re not the only one feeling like this.

So good to get a helpful GP.

I've gone back up to 40mg fluoxetine from 20mg which seems to be helping me alongside the HRT and also mounjaro.

Just wishing you all a nice weekend. I won't say stress free but as nice as it can be for us 😊

So lovely to find this thread, feel like I’ve fallen off a cliff of anxiety in the last month/months?. So exhausted and miserable, I don’t want to do anything but climb into bed and sleep but can’t as have a busy full time job where I’m expected to be very proactive and appear very positive (have learnt how to mask but it’s tough) Busy home life with two children. Feel so guilty that Im constantly miserable oh and quite angry at times too. Have been drinking more wine to take the edge off and realising something needed to be done so went to see GP who for a female of a similar age (49) didn’t seem very empathetic, told me my BP was high and last bloods showed higher levels of cholesterol which is now fuelling health anxiety as another lovely layer. Started HRT and really hopeful to feel better soon, really useful to read others stories.. sending virtual hugs to all feeling like me

its surprising how many women are struggling with peri/menopause and a variety of symptoms and anxiety being a key one.

i saw the HRT nurse on Friday who has changed me back to the patch and a different brand which she says she found better as have others. Manufacturer supply issue but found one pharmacy that had some in stock, although one very helpful pharmacist gave me a different brand name that is very similar to one prescribed so I could call on Monday to get a new prescription.

nurse also gave me the link to refer for CBT/talking therapy. Said CBT would probably be better as easily to access rather than needing to wait for an appt if struggling.

Nurse also said could get doctor to prescribe beta blocker for me to take when anxiety is high rather than taking an antidepressant each day. Can’t remember the name.

I’ve had Thursday and Friday off and that was much better. This weekend I can feel anxiety rising as due back. Plus adding on all the Christmas prep of Xmas purchasing etc this weekend is not helping.

Ultimately I think reduced hours will be a good balance of 3-4 days as this gives me time to breathe. Ideally need to find s job that is similar money to my FT job, so will keep searching and gain more experience in my current one for the CV.

December is so hectic that I’m hoping January will be better in general as no Christmas events/tasks and HRT helping.

will complete the referral from the link nurse sent me.

I hope everyone had a good weekend.

How is everyone doing x

I'm doing okay thanks I'm just adjusting to not working and it feels weird but my anxiety is definitely less. I think the hrt is starting to help a tiny bit too but my pelvic pain has been awful :(
How are you all doing?

How is everyone doing? X

I'm a bit tearful today. Feel stupidly anxious. x

I'm sorry to hear that Growsome. I'm feeling extra anxious today too. It is such a rollercoaster. Sending you a hug xx

Sorry to hear that people are finding it hard and the festive period gives no respite from anxiety.

my sleep has been shocking the past week - worse than normal. Felt unwell on Boxing Day and do think it was the anxiety.

mon a positive note I had my initial appt with mental health service re my anxiety and have a follow up appt this week so hopefully they will tell me the plan.

Hope everyone has managed to enjoy Christmas to some extent.

Happy new year xx How did you get on Brightlights? How is everyone else doing? X

How is it going OP xx

Thanks for asking Whatis xx I'm not doing as well as I'd hoped tbh. My mood is low and my anxiety isn't great. I feel so guilty not working too and I'm worrying about money.
I'm not sure if I need to change hrt as I've been on this regime for nearly 3 months x

I’m doing ok. Think the new HRT may have kicked in as my anxiety is not as bad as prior to Christmas. Still there with palpitations and my sleep is shocking but it’s not at same level. Hoping this continues.

Had a call with mental health services after referring myself and have been put forward for a worry management course (think it’s 4-6 sessions every 2 weeks with someone). Waiting to be contacted to arrange first one.

job wise still not entirely convinced but seeing how it goes.

due to household expenses and second child probably going to uni in sept 2026, I will need to look for another job that pays more. Currently on 27k and hoping my current job will give me the experience for my CV to be able to get a job on 35-40k. Will need the extra money for general living and supporting my son at uni. Hoping that is achievable and time to progress after raising the kids.

going to spend the time researching companies and possible jobs so that later this year I could start applying.

this gives time to sort out HRT and anxiety, look for right type of job and one that offers progression and higher salary opportunities.

or win the lottery!!

so far 2025 has been more settled but aware with perimenopause and the job that this may well change. Who knows how the current job will go and the direction it goes in.

hope everyone else is doing ok.

any chance of changing HRT or looking at support for anxiety if still a! issue? Really hard.

I really don't know what to do. I tried going back to work on a phased return last Monday and by Thursday I was completely overwhelmed by my negative intrusive thoughts and now I am at home again. I am due a review of HRT in a couple of weeks and not sure if the antidepressants are right. DH expects the GP to be able to 'fix' the issues but last time he suggested just talking to my boss.

DH is supportive on the whole but adamant that I need to stay working full time in my current job.

Is your son moving away to university Brightlights23?

Ours is staying at home and this is saving a bit of money, he also took a year out and worked, paid us a little rent and did a bit of travelling. He also said for lessons and his driving test.

That worked out quite well. Just thinking to might not all be 'on you' to fund him through.

That sounds really hard, I feel for you. I expect the pressure is adding to your stress?

Have you sat down with him and looked at the budget and how it could be worked out? Maybe it is the fear of not managing without your work that is worrying him. Maybe you could do something different, from home perhaps to make a bit of money? Hope you get to a place which works out for you.

Also it might take time to find the right meds. I'm on fluoxetine which is helping me but the others didn't, along with HRT

@Orangesandlemons77 thank you. I had been part time throughout when the ds were younger and I think he now feels I should be full time to balance it out. Additionally teenagers and university are very expensive and even though combined we are theoretically on a very good wage it does not seem to go far.

I am speaking to the GP tomorrow as I just want to feel able to do things again.

Your DS thinks that? I think that it is good for them to budget, earn money if they want to study, and be independent really. Don't let them pressurise you if you aren't ready / able

It is also good for them to understand about e.g. the menopause and being kind to / looking after others not just think of themselves.

Sorry you mean your DH, well him too x

DS2 is currently in year 12 so uni is definitely on the table. Have told him to apply anyway as can always change mind. DS1 applied and then just before results came out decided to take a year out to travel. He got a fab job and never went to uni in the end.

DH is a contractor so has said about putting rate up for next contract. I also feel that my wages are not much really (DS1 who is 19 earns nearly 10k more than me) so if I’m going to work FT I might as well see if I can earn more and then supporting uni/life in general inc treating myself a bit more would be possible.

I felt quite positive last week, although today wasn’t so keen. So up and down.

I really need to work as although DH earns 3-4 times me, with a hefty mortgage and COL and life in general we need my wages.

i need to use the next 6 months to sort out perimenopause and anxiety, more skills for cv and look at what job to do and who to work for.

I'm so sorry you are going through this. It's exactly where I was and to some extent still am. I'm just trying to think of a way to alleviate the pressure you are under. I know I kept going and going until I couldn't anymore.