Premature Menopause Support Group...anyone ?

[erilou38]

Hi there. I'm just thinking about setting up a little group for us poor ladies going through premature menopause. My doctor tells me that menopause is considered premature if the woman is under age 40. I'm 38 and believe i have been in menopause since i was about 35. I had hormone blood tests a year ago that showed i was borderline menopausal...only age 37, i could hardly believe it!! Anyway i now have lots of symptoms: irregular periods, periods are lighter a nd shorter. Hot flushes at night in bed, heart palpitations, insomnia, vaginal dryness, feeling tired all the time, hair loss and hair is dry and brittle, anxiety and depression. Oh, and i almost forgot, forgetfulness as well!! I find this whole premature meno very distressing and alone very isolating. Women that i know who are around my age don't understand as they are not going through it. None of my friends are experiencing it yet so i can't talk to them. I feel very alone a nd frustrated and get tearful and angry, (menopausal moods swings to blame i would think!) I'm sure some of you ladies must feel the same. Apparently prem meno happens to one in every hundred women so we are in the minority. Just thought it might be helpful if we could chat and share our thoughts and experiences. Erilou x

It would have to be a miracle i think!! I have 3 children from a previous relationship but my husband has none of his own. He says it doesn't bother him but he is only 26 and i can't help feeling as he gets older he will want his own child. He is great with my kids and it's heartbreaking that i'm most probably not going to give him his own baby. I will try the Clomid but if it doesn't work then that is it. I wouldn't get IVF on the NHS as i already have kids and no way we could afford to go private. Does your partner have children of his own ?

Yep I'm there but symptoms are mostly physical. I'm 43. Menstrual migraine has significantly worsened coupled with terrible neck pain. Already take sumatriptan.

Lighter periods, spots - big and hard causing scarring on chin, growing a full on beard, feel totally shattered and quite ugly - I'm usually pretty confident.

Gettings bloods done tomorrow and 2 week follow up appt with doc. Sounds daft, but I'm kinda shocked that this is happening - obviously in denial. Thanks for this thread it's very reassuring and prompted me to join mn. Xx

On a lighter note I have taken up karate so I can kick ass if at all gets too much. I look a right numpty getting confused with my left and right whilst being surrounded by 8year old ninjas :-)

Dh has a ds so we have one each but always wanted one together

I took the plunge and returned to we yesterday my weight is one thing I can control so going to focus on getting to my target this year.

I've read that exercise helps when going through meno but I'm recovering from a broken foot I sent 11 months last year in a cast so going to try walking.

Dh is being great says I'm still the same person yet in the last 4 days I feel I aged mentally 20 years

Shggg karate sounds interesting kicking the frustration out can only be positive

Anyone else suffering with dry eyes? mine are terrible and really sore

Yes spot to dry eyes - but one was constantly streaming, sounds perverse but it's a symptom of dry eye. I went to doc as I have to do public speaking and it looked odd - he said for God's sake you've not got cancer! Gave me some artificial drops called hylo tear which are great so yeah spotmoo it all adds up.

Grumpy but gorg doc clearly having a bad day as he was lovely yesterday when I went back. Depending on results I guess they may suggest hrt, I understand risks but too much sumatriptan is def not good for
you either. I cannot go on like this!

The dry eyes and tiredness are the worse yet I come to get in bed and I'm wide awake and melting from the night sweats

I have heard of dry eyes being a meno symptom, although that's one symptom i don't have as yet. I find that the skin on my face is drier and my hair is definqtely suffering. It's very dry and brittle and has thinned a lot. It has receeded at the sides of my head. My hair was always so lovely and thick and silky. It really upsets me that it is now in such poor condition. I wonder if HRT would remedy this. My lady bits are also dry and sex is sometimes painful.

It's lovely that your husband is being so supportive. I too feel like a woman in my 50s, both physically and mentally. I certainly don't feel like i'm only 38! We as women are meant to be in our prime in our 30s. This premature meno is just so shit.

Totally agree it's utter shite
My skin became really dry but I put that down to the weather rather than memo it did give me an excuse to purchase some new skin care products

I know you only started HRT yesterday but have you felt any effects as yet ?

Erilou demand oral pleasure helps xx

Hi girls

Can I join you? I have spoken to erilou on the fertility boards, I turned 30 in Aug, my most recent FSH last week was 23, my AMH was 2 6 months ago so I know it will be less now, I have been ttc for 7 years but never had any luck due to endo, in July this year I was declared endo free finally so I could get on with my ttc journey, by December I had been told I was going into early menopause and now will never have my own child

Lauren xx

Hi everyone,

I haven't been on here for a while, and loads more of you have joined since then.

I'm 40 later this year, which I know compared to some of you, who have been diagnosed, is a good old age!

As yet I haven't had my bloods done so don't know for sure either way, but I think I'm in the early stages of the peri-menopause. I was convinced a few months back, but having read some of the horrendous symptoms, I'm now not so sure. I do have several symptoms, but there a lot on here that I haven't come across yet.

I'll be getting my bloods done on day 3 of my next period.

For those of you who are really young, and haven't had DCs and wanted them . I can't imagine how you're all sounding so strong and positive.

Lauren your post really moved me, so unfair. Puts it in perspective - I'm 43 which I think is way too young, so for you it must be bloody awful. Try not to give up hope, anecdotally I've heard of women who conceive after confirmation of menopause.

Everyone is different but for me all these things are dropping into place and adding up to mean one thing. I've just come back from blood test and saw menopausaI? in big letters on my notes. Shit - I see myself as young in outllok, a vibrant, reasonably attractive and sexual being and don't reel ready for this.

At present I feel like a dried up, spotty witch with a constant hangover. This thread is ace as I would not discuss this out loud in RL.

Also dread turning into one of those women who go on about it all the time! At least this is anon. Xx

Thankyou, it was a bit of a shock as I spent years battling the NHS to get all my surgery done, I managed one cycle of ivf in Sept but when I started a second in Dec my FSH had trippled, they rechecked but its even worse now, so the hospital have withdrawn funding as they only treat ladies with and FSH of under 10, so glad I at least got that one cycle in, we are hoping now to go down the donor egg route, its like starting all over again

Do you know what your FSH levels are? I only ask as in wondering at what point I should expect symptoms, I had treatment with Prostap (chemical menopause) earlier in the year as part of my treatment for endo, and I got loads of side effects then that I'm sure are coming back now xx

I'm so glad i started this thread, at least now i know i am not alone! More and more of you ladies seem to be joining so now i realise that premature menopause is more common than i had at first thought. I know something wasn't right since i was about age 34, kept going to different doctors only to be told, "You are way too young for menopause, it isn't that"! Shggg245 -oral pleasure, chance would be a fine thing! Iv'e really gone off sex lately as i feel, inattractive and not at all sexy. Also i'm so tired all the time and sex is painful sometimes as i get dry down below. I feel so old and i'm sure i'm getting more wrinkles by the week! All of us ladies are too young to be going through this, menopause before 45 just isn't normal. It is so unfair. Even more heartbreaking for those of you who haven't yet had children xxx

I know what we have isn't life-threatening, or like having a terminal disease but i imagine it comes very close. It really is amazing what the power of hormones(or lack of) does to the female body. I read an article recently that said that women who have a premature menopause (before age 40) the symptoms are more likely to be severe, more so than with a normal menopause. It comes with so many symptoms, many of which really do make us feel physically ill and unable to function properly. Also the mental aspects are just as bad. I also read, that a drop in estrogen levels also causes serotonin levels to drop in the brain, causing depression and anxiety. I haven't felt well for 4 years now, which is when i suspect meno started. People have also commented that i always look tired and worn out. My body just doesn't feel like my own anymore and my mind in turmoil. I'm now having night sweats almost every night, i don't think it will be too much longer before my periods stop. All done and dusted by age 40 i reckon.

I'm really glad to find this thread as I think I'm be needing some support over the next few weeks / months! I've just turned 33, the age my DM was at her menopause. I only found this out a few months ago. DD is almost 1 and a total joy. Things have been rocky health wise since she was born; I have been v symptomatic with hyperthyroidism which now looks like is Grave's disease, my other thyroid antibodies are also all high. I was on the pill for years and conceived the first month off it ( early mc, one period, then conceived DD), my periods then took ages to start after finishing BF, and they are now all over the place, lighter, and cycle is lengthening. I haven't had bloods done yet as I am a chicken I know where this is all leading. Today is day 2 so I should be going to GP to get bloods done including AMH but I am avoiding it I guess I just don't want to confirm what I know is going to be a hard road of secondary infertility ahead.

I agree having this thread these last couple of days has been me feel I'm not alone my best friend has been great but I'm sure she doesn't want to hear me moaning for the next god knows how long.

Looking back I think my symptoms started a few years ago, especially the tiredness and anxiety but I just put it down to family stress then being off my foot for 11 months.

The dry eyes are really annoying at the mo and I'm going to see if I can get a spray or something for them tomorrow as struggled slightly on the school run this afternoon.

My periods are still the same in the fact their quite heavy but their irregular with bleeds inbetween.

Good luck Surgical widow, let us know how you get on with your bloods xx

How i wish all us ladies could meet up and have a good old natter about our plight! I'm actually thinking of writing a book on Premature Menopause. Thinking it might be a big seller! Would be great to turn this hell into something positive x

Bloody hell, this is getting bad. I dreamt about my periods last night on how nice and normal they used to be! I just want them back! I don't want to feel like this.

Erilou it crap isn't it
I've taken 6 HRT tablets now today I feel pretty good I slept in till 10.15 and only woke once in the night which is fantastic compared to the past month.
Eyes are still dry but I have a spray to use 4 times a day and that's really helped.