Week 10 - Low Carb Bootcamp - the last week!

[BIWI]

Well, finally, we reach the finish line! One more week to shout your shit.

Here's the Spreadsheet of Fabulousness

And the Weight Tracker

Hope the results are positive for you today - and that the rest of this week gives you time to drop another pound or two.

Ok, truncated attempt at a SuperReply as dinner ready fairly soon. Bless DP out there producing fanfuckingtabulous roast chicken smells.

Monkey very glad the boob lump was nothing too sinister. Was thinking of you.

Eva thank you xx Fishiness update to follow soon.

Trashy I love you. That is all. Even though you dress your dog in dresses, which I disapprove of and made DD shriek with utter unalloyed delight when I showed her the photos. Ditto Psychopup, Notso. I love the Wendell suggestion too.

I lie face down In Choccy shit with mouth open Whoosh this made me Remind me again about the duck when I haven't drunk wine and I'll set my mind to it. Have done wondrous things with duck legs... crispy duck with fried kale. That the kind of thing you're after?

BIWI will give thought to what info I'd have wanted at the start. Am so far off track at the mo that it's a bit challenging to get into that headspace. I just can't do moderation... it has to be either low carb or all carb; there's no 'sensible carb' option for me, it would seem.

Elephant News
I haven't even seen my elephant for fucking weeks now; it threw me into some bramble bushes and careered off into the blue yonder to wreak havoc (or reek havoc, as I saw on a thread today, and somehow like even more ), trash villages and trample villagers, leaving a trail of empty wine bottles, scone crumbs and the odd worm of spaghetti coated in carbonara sauce/melted cheddar. I just trudge along half a mile behind it, picking up the pieces of discarded carbs, mopping up the wine and 'sshhhh'ing the anxiety. I have actually been physically 'ssshhhhhh'ing myself this week, when my mind and pulse are racing with an anxiety I can't even identify a reason for. Fuck knows what's going on with me, honestly.

Fishy News
Splitters! Both in the gang sense, because these supposedly uber-community fish have been getting right arsey with each other, and in the literal sense, because the little female who is getting bullied by the others has developed splits in her tail which I'm guessing are fin rot. The original boy - Rush (DD named them!) - is firmly defending one end of the aquarium and not letting anyone in, and makes frequent and moderately violent excursions into the other end to chase and butt everyone else, especially the little female. The others chase her too, and now she just hovers above them all the time, not interacting with them at all. The two males do lots of gorgeous displaying and sparring with each other, and the other females are quite fiesty too, flaring and sparring with each other. Not what I expected and very interesting little fish.

Shrimp News
Well here's where it's all been at... the Killer Shrimp Saga. The peaceful little Amano shrimp that we bought from Pets@Home have turned out to be something entirely different and more predatory. Amano shrimp are little wee things which wander around the place hoovering up algae and leftovers and causing no problem to anyone. This is what I bought, according to P@H. After the brutal murder loss of the smaller shrimpy group members, I eventually clicked that the winning shrimp were much larger and had claws... not Amano shrimp at all.

Ok suddenly truncated post as roast chook dinner ready. Apologies to anyone I haven't mentioned/acknowledged. Big love to all you wonderful people. xxx

Maybe you are growing a lobster in there crabby keep at it and you can have it for dinner one day

If you really feel that the fish are not getting on see if PAH will let you take them back and exchange them. Some will, some won't.

Fantastic elephant story Crabby and poor little female fish.

I'm sorry you are anxious, it would be a shame to be beating yourself up over food however. Could you not just give yourself "permission" to eat the carbs? Then eat and enjoy without the anxiety? (apologies to anyone if this is an unhelpful place to be talking about such things.)

Morning all, I'm back to end of BC weight today after gaining 4lbs overall since the end. So nice and ready to start the next one!
Crabby- whilst not quite being a Carby Twat since BC ended I have been hoovering them up regularly. I've only 'got away' with it due to breastfeeding I think.

monkey just to inform you, I conducted an experiment today and weighed myself (225) then drank some H2O (500 ml) and re-weighed. I then weighed 226 so given the huge sample size and non reproduciblity of this experiment I conclude that your calculations from yesterday were correct and you were in actual scientific fact lighter than the day before

I think we should aksherley rule the world. We are beyond awesome.

Now, where has this other bastard lb come from-as this morning im 146

Only a 0.5 bastard lb if I read your posts correctly and nerdishly Monkey. Nothing to worry about, merely fluctuation of course.

Well done at your between bootcamp maintaining Pseudo

Trash I think photos of a day's meals on bootcamp would be brilliant. I am so not set up to be the girl to do this (don't have a smart-phone, or a camera). Could maybe do it at a weekend using DH's I-phone. I've been making myself chuckle thinking about whether I would go as far as snapping "a babybel I ate mid-morning" !!

Love the man-puppy photo. It is tarnishing his viking image for sure.

Evening losers and carbytwats Well I managed to lose 3lbs of the 5.5 I've put on since the end of BC last week.

DH has got the bastard Ofsted in all week (the perk of being in FE is you get more than 1/2 a day's notice, the downside is they come for a week) and has to go to the SLT meetings at 7pm so I've been able to have my tea at a reasonable time but I'll probably have the munchies when he gets home after 9 I made a yummy dressing to go with my salmon which I could enjoy without him pulling faces and making yuk sounds.

1 advocado
100g greek yog
tbs dijon mustard
2 tbs olive oil
squirt of lemon all whizzed up in the blender.

Monkey I'm always heavier after my morning drink but, no matter the size, I'm never any lighter after a poo (sorry if TMI but aren't you curious how much you've just deposited?)

Crabby I was thinking of you when my, very camp, hairdresser was telling me about his new super tank and all he had to do before he could put his fish in.

Just remembered, need to take psychopup for a walk and go on a poo hunt she'll only shit in our garden, DH does have some uses

Just coming on to SMS really (sorry ) and say that, somehow, God alone knows how, I still seem to be the same weight as when I last weighed in for bootcamp. But my shape has changed again - muffiny mc muffintop is back, not as big but still there. I can only conclude that the stairs at Dad's house have helped a little to keep the weight down, but that my complete wagon-desertion has increased the belly flab again. SOOOOOO glad we're starting again on Monday next week - I need motivating.

Now I'm back home it should be easier to get back on the wagon properly. :)

Evening all! I had my backside octopus tattoo finished today. Two hours of scritchy flaying...

Drank some coffee with cream, first I've had in a while - am manic as buggery. Had to rush work, and have run around like a blue arsed fly all day - still haven't made the kids dinner yet!

Only on here as I wait for trashpup to settle in her new bed, which is in fact a trug..... The dcs are learning 'I am sailing' at school - they are currently on there ipads playing clash of clans and belting out yet another rendition, in chorus, with full on verbal gymnastic bits

Currently, they have changed the words to 'I am farting, I am farting, very loudly'

Right, puppy asleep, will check in later with actual proper words, as opposed to insanity caffiene waffle!

Its very quiet on here...do you all have real lives or something?!

Eva and Trash and whoever yes photos would be great, maybe a thread when the next BC starts with pictures of what we've made. I've managed to post photos before so I am sure I can again!

Well done notso my aim is to start BC at no more than 1lb more than I left...so I'll weigh tomorrow and see where I am with that.

I bought (and ate) pork scratchings for the first time today, I've always chickened out of buying them in case someone thought "she doesn't need those". Today I just bought them and I think I'd have them again as an occasional snack in place of crisps (though I didn't eat crisps anyway).

Nothing much exciting happening, was at an interesting seminar tonight after work, a solicitor came and spoke about the law and its relationship with science and medicine. I learnt quite a lot that I didn't know before, it was very good. In fishy news, my fry are growing well and in the big tank this evening my shy fish (four of them that I very rarely see) came out at feeding time which was nice

Off to make my dinner now, I've got chilli and I am going to eat it with a little gem lettuce with lots of cheese on top. Yummy

Aaah that's better. Chores done (ish - have utterly failed to put away clean laundry) Washed bum cheek, post tattooing and applied bepanthen. Belly pork in the oven - should be ready in half an hour or so, am gonna have it with rocket and some wilted baby spinach.

Have eaten really weirdly today, starting with several spoonfuls of lidls greek yoghurt and a strawberry at eight o clock, followed by beginning of the manic rushing.

Got a bizarre arrangement going on a Monday night - dp and I don't actually live together, so we spend the nights I have dc at mine, and the nights they are with their daddy at his, except on a Monday, because neither of us have sky telly, but dp has a Now TV box thingy, and of course, Monday night is GOT.

So, me and the dcs stay at his, which is lovely as he 'hosts' us and I do very little However, yesterday I got two - yes - two flat tyres! So I had to leave my car at home, which meant an earlier start than we are used to this morning, as he had to drop us at my house on his way to work, so we could walk to school. Then I walked our dogs, whilst waiting for the lovely tyre shop man to get back from the scrap yard with some new to me tyres Dealt with the two flat fucking tyres on the bastard car, which then made me later than intended for work.

Ate more spoonfuls of yoghurt, and some pepperami slices and a slice of cheddar cheese

Ran around doing work and had several, boring but thwarting events along the way, which made me ten minutes late for my bloody tattoo appointment, which was booked six months ago, due to the guys popularity!

Arrived in orbit of stress, but trying to keep a lid on it, and be all, like, y'know, cool cos I'm in the tattoo studio and I don't want to look like a tit. Also, had asked if the trashpup cpuld come in, so was already pushing my luck. Fortunately my tattoist is awesome, and didn't mind any of my twitting around. Did a splendid job on my bum, (it's a cover up of a £5 butterfly I had done when I was 15 ) but it was rather painful at times. Managed to not be too deranged, left there, had a quick coffee in a cafe and went to grab dcs from school. Sent them to play in the park whilst I saw a friend for a cuppa and ate a spicy sausage thingy (tescos deli meat thing)

Went back to work for an hour then to Lidls and when I got home ate some more salami.... Not tons at any point, just a little graze to tide me over. Fucking bonkers by this point.

I think it's lots of little stresses, coupled with something hormone related, (as my norks are in agony) and the bodily stress of tattoo. Oh and not enough food.

Hopefully my sanity will soon return.

Sayra only if you could call this a "life"... I'm still up at 11.15 at night, working, with no end in sight as I've got to try to merge some pdfs and I am clueless technically. It could be hours before I find a way.

Obviously I'm only working at night because I skived my job during the day to go to the planning application appeal. I REALLY know how to enjoy myself.

Not as much as Trash does though with her flat fucking tyres and tattoo and bonkers jitters. Honestly I can't even read that straight its like a tongue-twister - fat flucking tyres...

I think this is the calm before the next bootcamp storm. Its quite active over here!: www.mumsnet.com/Talk/low_carb_bootcamp/2058423-Next-Low-Carb-Bootcamp-starts-on-5-May

Pdf hell is now done. Gawd

I just weighed in at 143.2lb. Thats a 3lb loss since yesterday

Now, either my scales are fucked, or Im really doing it!

My new scienfific theory cough is that as I had 2 weeks sort of off the wagon, now Ive had a week back on, my body has jump started again. Could that be true?!

My scales are broken arent they

Sounds like you had a bit of a hectic day yesterday Trash, so you have an octopus on your bum? Just being nosy but why did you pick an octopus?

Glad you got finished Eva, how did it go with the appeal go or do you need to wait to find out? I thought that I'd signed up on the new thread but its not appearing in "I'm on" I did have a look and you are right it is busy.

Monkey I have a feeling that yes you could have had a wee kick start so thats great but just to check do you have access to scales anywhere else or someone who could stand on yours to check? Thats how I worked out mine were broken, though mine added a stone on so more obvious.

I imagine that this might out me to anyone who knows me but never mind, I've not got anything to hide

We are having a wonderful visit today at work, Alex Salmond is coming to visit to start his European election campaign. I am very glad that I am not funded by Europe nor European as those people get the joy [hmmm] of meeting him. I am tempted to wear a "Better Together" t-shirt today but I think I might get into trouble I'm just going to be very subtle and hang a Union flag outside my office

I seem to have managed to get back on the wagon and I am down to 2lbs away from my last BC finishing weight so very pleased about that. I've already started to lose my appetite a bit (amazing how hungry you get on carbs!) and not be hungry between meals.

Will be playing badminton today and the guy won't be there. I'd also like to say crabby you were right about my colleagues, one of them, without my knowing, emailed him back and said "do you realise that Sayra is fitter than X and I and she does exercise everyday, I don't think you should have left her out". He sent back a very patronising reply saying that he didn't have enough leadership experience to make routes for those with below average fitness and he is sorry but I am just not fit enough and anyway he didn't think that my friend and X would have been able to do it either so his attempt at making new friends (which is what his aim was) has failed specatularly as apart from friend emailing to stand up for me no one else replied. Some amusing replies were suggested but none of us would ever send any of them "I'm having a party but its only for nice people, sorry you don't fit that criteria", "I'd invite you for lunch but I don't think you'd keep up"

Just thought I'd update and let you know that I am no longer upset.

OMG - there are 10unread pages on the next bootcamp thread....and a million new names on it ! Thanks for the heads up eva.....

trash lets see your gorgeous arse cheeks when your Octo is ready for viewing

Are we all migrating over to other thread now ? or might we scare the new recruits grin] with talks of carbytwatwankerness , orgasmic lists, crazy dressed up pups and fishyfever. !!

Love you all virtual vipers and don't want to be on the wrong thread !

Personally keeping away from the scales for another week at least - as badness followed badness and I have fallen by the wayside..... Am spurred on by talk of new BC and the thought that I had promised myself to stay the same and not put half a stone back on

laters bootcamp chatty friends.

I'm planning on staying here until BC starts. I might go and say hello and welcome but I didn't want to scare them off by having us all descend on them.

I should go to work...

ooh, I'm off to lurk swot up on newbies

And I will post my octopus today before it gets too scabby whooshy

I have to confess sayra that I picked the octopus purely on aesthetic value. I had to draw the buggering thing myself though, cos I couldn't find any image that matched my 'minds eye'. I did take into consideration dp having to see it.... how shall I put this.... during things so I didn't want anything that would.... put him off

Also it kinda goes with my horse on my forearm, and I have a little hare on my foot - they are all animals and all black, so there's kind of a theme. Really, though, I wanted something big and spectacular to cover the shitty butterfly that had blurred beyond recognition

Feeling very chuffed as I'm now only two pounds up after the eight pounds easter disaster! Hurray!

Right, off to lurk

Right, testing to see if this works. Phone couldn't upload the picture as the thread is so long I assume so I have e-mailed it to myself and done it that way.

Is this the sort of thing in terms of pictures - I have just eaten halloumi and prosciutto with a pile of rocket, basil infused olive oil and mayonnaise but hopefully you can tell the size of portion too with the cutlery visible.

Ooh, it worked!!

In other news...

Sayra you make the life of a researcher sound really good. I was always put off - didn't even do a BSc with my main degree because I didn't think I could hack 5 months of research dissertation. In terms of interest, and work-life balance, and...

trash you are, of course completely mad and wonderful. Hope you are not too sore to sit down today.

Eva I hope you aren't too exhausted today. Be kind to yourself, won't you.

Well done to all the weight loss victors - monkey, notso etc. I've lost 3.75lb since Sunday - back to being strict with no sweeteners. But with the lunch I've just had, I am so not deprived.

I've sorted my clothes out this morning and have a bin bag of too big things and I AM going to give them away. I DON'T need them anymore. It's a bit scary though. I've got my lovely summer clothes out so when it goes cold and wet it's my fault and feel good about it.

Looking forward to the busy-ness of next week but no chance of doing a CrabbySuperReply then!

Glad you're all revving up so successfully to next week

Now, I have a couple of important things to say/ask:

First, the Spreadsheet of Fabulousness. For various reasons, the ever-lovely Willie isn't going to be able to do the spreadsheet next Bootcamp. We do, however, have the equally fabulous Weight Tracker on our own, special, sparkling area of Mumsnet (see here if you haven't already used it )

MN can't host a spreadsheet, but they can make the Weight Tracker reflect everyone's weight, apparently. However, they set it up as they did as they thought everyone would prefer an individual/more private option.

So my question. If you're a spreadsheet preferrer, can you tell me why you prefer the spreadsheet to the Weight Tracker?

If we only have the Weight Tracker from now on, what do you think we will have lost?

Second. Talking about cheating

Like all Bootcamps seem to have done, these chat threads have taken on a life of their own! However, one thing that I would please ask you to do when we move on to the next Bootcamp is to be very careful if you post about cheating. I know that we all do it, and everyone joining the next Bootcamp will do it at some time. But just be mindful that it can be very difficult for others, especially if they are struggling, to read about the types of food you're cheating with - especially if it doesn't appear to affect your weight loss.

And remember, for those who are new to low carbing, they can struggle to get their head around what they can and can't eat, so it can make it very confusing for them.

Thank you.

monkeyfacegrace - I've just realised that my post could be construed as ticking you off for cheating, but it really wasn't, honestly! Just a general observation/comment/plea!