I do just wonder, though, about the cast-iron certainty being expressed here about what the DC's (generally) want and how often it seems to exactly coincide with the wishes of the Mum.
My DSS has been talking a lot this weekend about holidays, not sure what kicked it all off, just being half-term, maybe. Now he knows that holidays contact (like all his other contact with Dad) is very firmly defonied by court order, and we never encourage him to think we can change that, because we can't.
We also don't say we'll ask Mum (if we can have extra time, for example) as that puts her in the bad guy position every time. (Although I do sometimes feel that it is a richly deserved position, considering how difficult she has made getting this level of contact, but hey ho)
So when he was asking about whether he could come on holiday with us next year, I told him he'd have to talk to his Mum and Dad about it. He calmly told me that he has already told his Mum he DOESN'T want to because he knows anything else would upset her and she'd tell him off, and couldn't he just talk to the court lady and tell her.
It's natural for kids to love both parents and want to spend time with them, including special days - but they also prioritise the feelings of parents above their own desires and often tell us what we want to hear.