Where have all the fit and interesting men gone part 12a

[lou33]

seeing as there has been discussion about using 13

(not that it bothers me)

i feel sorry for myself my back is still playing up, and i just tripped and made it hurt in the usual lower back place

(tbh i'm too tired to be wanting to go out at 10pm as well!)

he's trying to talk on FB chat. shall we see if he's rung first?!

go on and tell us his explanation.

lb just called and told me he is off to bed his abscess is killing

so we had a quick update about our days and i said i would call him tomorrow after the school run

Been out today with family, had a proper Sunday lunch at my Dis's then went to the pub. It was a good day.

Mousie if you have added anyone on fb I'm also in the loop so will cat you with my name.

ok 1.25 hr phone call with him!!!

he fancies me! when I said do ya really he went well yeah you're gorgeous sooo pleased.

on the other hand the same issue (situation) is still unresolved. I've said my bit now fully on it all, offended him as well in the process, but basically said from my POV I had to decide if he was being genuine or if he was being a twat & using this as an excuse - I also appreciated where he was coming from, he said well what if I can't get my head around things - I was like well you know the answer to that one, there's only one option, to which he said hmmm.... Kept saying that it wasn't cos he didn't like me cos he does, and it's 2 separate issues I said I think he's worth it etc which is the thing I was struggling to decide on, but I don't want my thoughts to interfere/influence his choices as would rather he decided on his own his own feelings. He said he appreciated i'd been patient & reasonable about it all He said again he's not been seeing anyone else, he's apparently had texts form people he met b4 me but has always said he's busy to them, like wise on the dating site - same thing replies if they ask him questions about his hockey/home town. Then added he wasn't looking for anyone else, & there was nothing in any of it. So quite happy there, pleased he fancies me thou - he was a bit shocked I didn't know already.

basically as stands thou he knows i'm expecting him to say he can't get his head around things, and have basically said, you do you do you don't you don't. but either way I have a child and nothing's gonna change that. Also talked about future plans He said he wants to get married & have kids int he future, I said possibly I did but not right now as in not in the next 2-3 years. He said would need to think about that as well, but obviously he's wanting to be settled b4 he has kids.

Think the main issue is not so much getting his head around DS, it's getting his head around the fact I have a past where i've been married before with a child and have had that level of commitment.

no further forward really but the air has been cleared I think - the next few days I think will be telling. oh and apparenlty he dated someone here for 14 months b4, and for a year of that didn't want to be with them, so he says basically it won't happen again so this is why he'd rather think about it all now.

i'm happy for you but also confused

of course he should fancy you if he has been spending time with you, you sound almost relieved, and that shouldnt be the case

the big sticking point for me is still the unresolved issue of how he feels wrt your dc, i think by now he should know whether or not he feels he can handle dating someone witha child

and the "past" thing tbh i think is daft, because everyone is going to have a past of some sort

do you really think this is worth all the doubt you are putting yourself through? it seems ot me you spend an awful ot of time worrying about how he will feel and not putting yourself first

another thing i would raise an eyebrow at was the fact he says he is "busy" rather than seeing you, when these women are in touch wanting to see him

to me it hints at the fact he wants to keep other avenues open just in case

i cant even contemplate talking about stuff like kids and marriage to anyone so thats something i am not going to have any input on lol

i hope i am not coming across as abrupt, i just think you accord him too much say in what is going on and not allowing yourself to have enough of a say

lol. no not that Lou, I do know he did deep down, it's just I don't consider myself to be fanciyable (something about not wanting to sound conceited iycwim) also don't like to assume anything.

He's said his family know he's seeing someone. To be fair I think he just is really shite with his words. & doesn't explain himself too well. Oh and he said I was clever - hmm.... lol.

On the whole thou it was quite a positive in depth chat. I did get my point across to him, (prob more so that i'm saying here) but managed to do it in a way that hasn't caused any friction.

I did say to him thou that I think he's already made up his mind, and he'll say no, he said really - but then he's a huge pessimist - I said I think about 85% yes you have which is why I'm saying I expect you to walk away.

We shall see watch this space.

Belle I've been following your posts and I've been feeling quite uneasy about all of this. I think you should take some control. a
Above you said ......'I said I think he's worth it'.

What about your worth? What about ds's worth. I think this one needs watching.

There I've said it. Sorry. I know you're keen on him, but I think the ball is very much in his corner all the time.

You are worth so much more than this.

I'm pressing post without any further ado.

i agree monty and i feel like an absolute shit for admitting it

thanks for your imput guys. I am thinking about it honestly. (know you must all be frustrated by now)

You know i've said it before ultimately DS is my main concern, I would never compromise him.

i dont doubt that at all wrt your ds, not for one second, i just think this guy doesnt sound worth the time you are giving him

and i think you are ultimately prolonging the disappointment when he doesnt follow through as you want him to

i really hope i am wrong though

Belle, I know you would never compromise your ds, but you are still letting him dangle you play you whatever the word is imho.

I met a guy once who was really keen on me. I mean really keen on me. He was not keen on the fact I had dc's. I never gave him a look in. And he didn't pursue it further.

This one might not be won over.

Hi Lou. I feel shit too.

Belle I'm having to stop myself from saying 'tell him to feck off'.

lol. don't worry all of my RL friends are telling me the same - well they're flitting between me giving him space and binning him off - friends say bin him family who have actually met him say give him some space, I have said to him tonight quite firmly that all last week I was thinking do I walk away now or not (to also gauge his reaction and also so he knew where I was at with this) - I did also say that I was thinking that I wasn't sure if he/it was worth all of the hassle. (hence why I said what I said.) that was the bit that he took offence to - along with my calling him a twat! lol.

Something about this one that's all i'm saying.

I do believe he's struggling with it all, but honestly my instincts are not sure on what the outcome will be.

You're a keeper Belle

I really hope it works out. Its obvious you're very keen.

xx

lol. yeah prob too much so, he appears to be as well. He said I was very sweet natured?!!? isn't that something you say about your nan! lol.

belle - but you can be sweet natured and still wicked in the sack

i'm agreeing with others on this one, and you know i am. i've already stuck my head up and said about the way he's playing with your head.

I know Juicy, which is why I've taken steps to protect that. been there too maky times (althou it doesn't sound like it)

oh and yes - wicked in the sack! lol. Then again so is he

morning all!
hark at lou having a NM lol
belle-this thread is here for you to vent about gymboy,and none of us are going to be pissed off about it,we have all met men who have literally done our heads in,if anything getting it all out on here will help you get things into perspective
hope everyone else is good

Belle, think we are all trying to say that you are giving him far too much head space. If you want to carry on seeing him then do so by all means, it's your life, you have to live it and you know deep down what makes you happy, but please don't focus on a future with gymboy not yet. Just enjoy it for what it is atm.

By all means let off steam on here though.

asbm you sound like its a bit of a miracle

i left my jacket there which is a pain cos its one i wear all the time, so it means im going to have to go to his office tomorrow and collect it, how awful eh

he said i did it on purpose lol

oh blimey i just realised its a2 hour drive each way

eek

i bets get someone to pick up the kids for me after school then, seeing as i promised i would bring him lunch

Hi everybody.

Lou- must be a very precious jacket .

Rofl at bringing him lunch .

Is that a euphasim for something else ?

Hope everyone is well.

hahaha oi cheeky!

i think he has a new apprentice starting tomorrow so i cant see anything untoward happening

its the jacket i wear most of the time, ive had it donkeys years, plus as he said, it's an excuse to see him

i've not been to his workshop before, but its only a few miles from his place, although the routemaster thing on the aa says its another half hour drive

no idea what to take for lunch

anyway ot all depends on if i can get someone to pick up my boys after school

Do NOT, under any circumstances, even when tired from a long day, suggest cooking toad-in-the-hole if bf drops round for tea on his way home.
I missed the innuendo... how stupid can I be??