Where have all the fit and interesting men gone part 12a

[lou33]

seeing as there has been discussion about using 13

(not that it bothers me)

i feel sorry for myself my back is still playing up, and i just tripped and made it hurt in the usual lower back place

scl - rise above it ice maiden.

however does he usually go on there a lot? might he actually be v v busy/poorly or something? (looking for the best here)

re the dr's - might be the washing powder, but one assumes that that would give you an all over body type rash not hives specifically?

morning... phew... took me ages to catch up on thread.

scl - apalling manners from samename ... still not heard a single thing from him? thats pissy.

ninah - waiting to hear the outcome from bf period of thinking/deciding.

asbm - ... i'm here. just up to my eyes in coursework so trying not to post but still keep up to date.

belle - good for you in coming to a decision. being friends is not easy. but whether or not it works and doesn't do any hurt your trying to avoid is completely different manner.

lou - sounds like you had good wkd.

mousie - still being sick?

sparky - wow... dubai ... sounds fab.

betty - hi, arranged 2nd date yet?

as for me. things still peachy with bf.agree with actions speak louder than words. he made me homemade roast as we both died a hideous hangover on sunday.

exp told me last week he's planning on disappearing again to italy, so told him to keep kids sat and sunday night and i went awol again with bf. he wasn't best pleased and had some choice words for me this morning. but it's only fair since i'll be getting incarcerated (to steal ASBM's phrase) for a few weeks sometime soon and not able to really see irish.

wow juicy your summarising skills are amazing!

Heard nothing was telling my rl workmate who I bumped into this morning - her immediate reaction was he's depressed. If he is then I really don't think I can handle it tbh (he was always saying he didn't want to dump his probs on me) as my exh was often depressed and wouldn't do anything about it.

scl that might be the case but you certainly don't need his problems
need someone nice and upbeat who returns calls
rj you back! glad all's well, when rl intervenes it usually is good news lol
thanks for all the backup everyone, feeling fighting fit today and back to my normal self, whatever happens with bf I'm OK with it, and if it's just more dithering he's toast

scl do hope that gp gets to the root of this as it must be making you terribly uncomfortable.as for samename and poss.depression yes i know it can make you withdraw from people but considering the length of time that he's been seeing you,one would hope that it would raise his spirits iykwim.is he on meds btw?
and can fully understand why you would be reluctant to take all this on board aft.exh and his probs.
rj-no probs,i know you've been busy,and i know if you're not about it's because you're happy which is fab!!
belle you're also sounding chipper!
and to our lovely ninah here's hoping for a good outcome

Hi, everyone well 2nd date kinof arranged for fri but depends on when he has his little boy so that's ok with me. The other bloke hasnt really messaged me since so not bothered. 1st guy was texting most of day yeserday, and we talked on msn for a few hours

Ninah-you are handling it so well, good for u for sticking to what u want. I really hope he realises what he will be loosing!

Scl-I dont think i could handle all that with depression etc either esp if you have been there before. Did u go to the docs?

juicy(i take it u chnaged ur name recently)-lol at u going awol, i dont blame u! I would if i could sometimes lol

AHY COME ON ALL BEHIND NINAH FOR SOME PMA! (oops sorry! lol) positive mental attitude. we'll be here either way ninah, hope it goes how you would want thou.

juicy - I know it's hard, this week will tell I think if I can handle it or not - pics tomorrow and a childless night when he'd normally stop over & DS with his dad on fri - again when i'd normally stop at his - esp as on sat we're both not doing anything.

why shouldn't you get to blow off some steam for a bit anyhow, how's things with irish?

blondie - chipper - yeah why not - gotta be haven't ya! lol. besides choc n a tin of pop sorts everything out.

sin - ultimatly it's up to you, do you think he has depression? will you ignore him if he does get in touch?

betty - woohoo date no 2 go you!

yes rooting for you Ninah - positive thoughts through the ether.

Betty - whey hey for second date.

To answer your question exh would not seek any help fo hisr depression - I used to beg him to go to gps but he wouldn't - preferred to inflict it on me and dcs.

Luckily I have not suffered from full blown depression but have certainly had ups and downs.

sending some positive thoughts for u Ninah!

way hey betty sounding good
like you scl my exh has issues and with the benefit of my own experience of depression(caused by him)i feel that he needs serious help,it was one of the things which he offered to sort out thinking he'd keep me save our marriage but it had reached the point of no return.some people i think cannot change and he's one of them.
as you obv.don't have feelings as such for samename then i guess you wouldn't be prepared to help him thru it if he is genuinally ill.
belle so is a can of pop and some choccie the answer to getting thru the day then?!

totally blondie - absolutly that and a Dells sarnie (local greasy spoons van) always the way forward, that and leaving the phone at home so don't have to worry about gymboy's contact or lack of.

I think re the depression thing, a lot of men find it hard to actually admitt they're depressed and in need of help. althou as blondie says scl if the feels are not there in the first place for you to want to stick around..

ASBM without wishing to sound hard no I don't think I could - it would be different if we were really serious or living together - I have a long history of sticking with people with probs when others might have bailed out.

If I had no probs of my own again then fine but I have got enough on my plate with financial, housing, health, work issues and just the general juggling.

God that's made me feel exhausted.
I need a holiday or break from everything. Sorry for the downbeat tone - I am usually very upbeat even in the face of adversity.

don't worry about it sin, I think we all fully understand. roll on 10 minutes so I can go home. YAY!

haven't read Mars and Venus but isn't there something about men going into their cave.

I know exbf does this alot.

also had a 19 yr old hit on me on one of the sites - jeez he's only six years older than ds1

scl no you don't sound at all hard,i understand completely where you're coming from,and it's not out of lack of compassion.purely i think for the well-being of ourselves and our dcs(who lets face it rely solely on us to exist)we just have to make our lives as uncomplicated as poss.and i've found that unless it's someone extremely precious to me i just have to avoid negative people, i do not wish to take on board others'issues and probs.
saying that all of you lovely lot on here are exempt from this

lol @ men retreating into their caves
and where the hell exactly can we retreat into ffs?
we wouldn't manage more than 5mins undisturbed before cries of 'mummy,mummy...'

belle - i went awol at bf house. does that say it all . i did ask him if he thought i was being a shitty mother. but made me realise it wasn't even 36 hrs i was leaving them with their dad. and he will be leaving me for weeks or possibly months sometime soon. and actually.. kinda pissing me off that exp wont book for definate and give me a date he's going to be away or returning. so cant make any plans to do anything next few months.

retreat to spa???

Good afternoon all you lovely lot.

What's up with everyone?

Juicy/rj - are you still seeing irish?

ASBM - hope things are still proceeding apace with actionman

mousie - how are you?

southsbelle - saw your other thread about gymboy. What's happening there?

lou - trust all well with

I seem to have been on an extended absence, this is for a myriad of reasons. Main one being that me and DS are moving house in a few weeks and I'm totally panicking about how much NEEDS doing.

I am actually doing things, not just panicking but YKWIM.

Also DS' birthday in 3 weeks. Unusually for me I have presents sorted. That's something.

Anyway, as you were. Sorry if I left anything out there.

Now, back to fretting. I need a month off somewhere HOT.

Right, must learn to finish sentences:-

lou, trust all well with nm?

"and where the hell exactly can we retreat into ffs?
"

Damn straight. I thought it was only cavemen went into caves? Last time I looked we are in 21st C!

yes it did thanks, he is coming to stay here overnight in a few weeks

janos - well he's apparently still thinking about things i've decided to be friends now after all of it, caved thou and rang earlier first time since thursday, said was having a drink with friend b4 dropping him off, & would ring. not holding my breath tbh. not sure why i'm that bothered actually. Will all work out right in the end. (and he's actually just text, has apparently gone to the gym & says i'll prob see you up there - am playing hookey tonight! lol)

what is it with men and wanting to run away? - don't know about u gals but i'd love the chance to run away into a hidey place for a few weeks and not emerge for anything, but RL gets in the way - how long would it be before one of the dogs or DS came in causing havoc! lol.

janos - re the house move - make a list, lists are good! list every little thing pack up all non essentials ready, and leave the rest for the removals!

ninah - hope you're doing ok.

juicy - you little stop out you!!!!

anyhow it's just a night of tarot reading n alan carr for me - assuming DS actually does decide to go to sleep prior to 9pm tonight - he's in his room again at 7 and is saying 'mummy.... mummy.....' already hes' done 2 poo's in 45 minutes I'm sure it's to stay up longer!

omg omg omg

1. samename txt me - he has had a bad accident on his bike, feel terrible we are speaking later tonite

2. Ds1 posted as me on another thread so might have to change my name etc

3. Workhubby made me cry tonight (went for very swift drink) as he said something very complimentary and something no-one has ever said before

Life is sooooo strange