Where have all the fit and interesting men gone part 12a

[lou33]

seeing as there has been discussion about using 13

(not that it bothers me)

i feel sorry for myself my back is still playing up, and i just tripped and made it hurt in the usual lower back place

WOW, that's far

yes, it's why we speak a couple of times a day but only get to see each other every few weeks

Ahh. It's never easy hey!

I've decided to just let it flow, if it's ment to be with my bloke then it will. If I push it then he'll just get annoyed. I've nothing to loose, even if I do just get a friend out of it or something more. I'll have to wait and see.

i guess it depends if you feel he is worth being a friend if nothing else

i am quite happy with the way things stand between myself and lb right now, but i know if i wasnt i would have to say something

I'd rather he was a friend then nothing. He's really letting me get to know him though, he's such a private person, I don't see why he's doing this. he's told me so much about him and has said things that not even his parents know about him. It's an odd relationship to have with someone.

ask him why he wants you to know all this about him

That's a plan!! The more he tells me, the more we have in common, it's spooky!

on that note i am off to bed

night!

night

good morning everyone

Morning
all

Fluffy I have found that men seem to respond very well to some direct questions and it can draw out an response about their feelings? not an interrogation of course.

So like Lou said ask him why does he wantyou to know all this about me?

It has worked for me in a slightly different situation.

Hi Fluffy it's great to have new people here.

RJ - definitely NM!

Actually, on that note, in some ways I am really pleased with myself for breaking the 'too-fast' cycle that has not done me any good in the past. But in some ways I am very very emotionally involved even though there is physical distance. We even very tentatively used the 'L' word this week....
And he says he has "never felt like this about anyone before". Can you get to your mid-thirties and never have fallen in love? (he has an XW and a DS) Am I too sceptical? I want to believe in it but am holding back a bit I think. He's away with work this week so have some time to think. Mostly am just thinking how much I am looking forward to him being back .

DD and I have a vomiting bug - she is mostly better, I am not, she thinks I am very boring. Having some ex issues, will start another thread for those.

morning all, just marking my space till I can get back tonight.

nothing really to report here. not really spoke n to gymboy at all since sat am. ho hum.

lb is still sick, i quite fancied going to see him but it wouldnt be a good idea

i just went for a npa, got all comfy and cosy and shut my eyes

bloody phone goes off

lb wanting to chat cos he had a short break whilst waiting for something to dry, lol

i have to get ds2 in 10 mins

Mousie, yes I think it is possible to be in a marriage, come out of it, then find out what love really is with another person. I've known men in their mid thirties and beyond say that it's only when you meet other people that you realise how wrong the marriage was.

totally agree

I might fall even harder if I let myself really believe I might mean that much to him - what is going on with me?? - is this vomiting induced dehydration speaking and not my brain?!?

yeah agree mousie totally as well.

with XH I don't thinkl I knew true love, as to if I do now who knows, but I know with XH he was my world, there was a passion there but not as it should have really been I don't think not sure.

spoke to gymboy briefly again today - getting frustrated at the mo with him calls of a few minutes, or not at all, texts as well thou.

he's coming over.

Enjoy your evening!!

thanks.

right now then fluffy, this here chappy of yours, you'd like to have him as a friend, and a slow burner is good, but make sure you do waht you want to do as well and what's right for you. (know i'm a fine one to talk lol) but well basically we've all been given another chance at this love thing, so we shouldn't settle for just anyone we should go for the happy every after and fairy tale. althou my XMIL often tells me that person doesn't exists and that I should have accepted that in a marriage your H is allowed to hit, abuse, cheat and run up debts on pay per view porn. cos if I did that then XH wouldn't have walked out well sorry for not letting him cheat/hit me- he might have been abusive & pushed me about but hey ho)

anyhow I digress, if you think this man is worth it then by all means see how it works out, be a friend, but don't let him play games with you - ie the whole i'm not gay yet thing.

I've also come to realise that if you want things to work out how you want them to then the best thing is to a) not force/rush the issue, and b) to think logically & rationally before actually making any moves/decisions.

but then again doesn't always work out for me.

From what I gather, he needs to be given the time to reach his own conclusions. He's receptive to what we discuss, he just needs to feel in control of his life, which is fair. He's been bullied into things before and I think that he needs to let the penny drop in his own time. We have so much in common my instinct tells me he'll get here eventually. I think he's worth it, I'm really picky about the men I date, I've been single through choice for a long time because I have such high standards. I'll give him time, if I just get a good friend then this is fine, I'll be gutted if he finds the woman of his dreams though but I'll get over it.