Where have all the fit and interesting men gone part TWELVE

[lou33]

starts here

why would you bin off gymboy before asking about it?

he may well just have been checking mail or hiding a profile or something, talk to him before you dump him

Hi everyone, hope you don't mind if I join in, have been lurking for a while. Decided to go back online after break-up 3 months ago. Pretty slow start, but am now chatting with a man who seems gorgeous and interesting. Towards the end of our first phone conversation which went amazingly, he suggested meeting up. Neither of us could fix a time there and then because of childcare but I suggested we speak this weekend and try and sort something out.

We've also texted and he's said some really nice things. But I need to get it right this time - I get in such a tizz in the early stages. Do I just let him initiate everything from now on? I've been responding to his texts and saying positive things about how I'm enjoying talking to him etc. Is that all the encouragement he should need? If I haven't heard from him by Sunday is it OK to text him and say have a good trip to NY (he's going there on business for a couple of days on Monday) and to let me know if you'd like to get together when he gets back? What's the view on who initiates what right at the beginning?

wow you've all been busy on here today!!!

juicy - seeing NS tomorrow (hopefully mid afternoon till sunday morning! ) but we shall see depends what time he finishes his race & I finish up with my nan. was hoping to see him tonight in the gym but alas he was a no show! ah well lol. all good means I can flop in bed early, all to myself & have a nice long long lay in!

glad everyone seems to be getting on OK today.

will catch up properly tomorrow am so tired.... need sleep....

hi sparky!
glad to hear things are going well
imho i would leave him to start the texting only reply to them and not straight away either!
i know it sounds like playing games but ime men both like and need to pursue us women and they don't like it when we're too readily available
others will probably disagree with me but i'm def a rules girl when it comes to the early dating stages

And hello to you blondie! To save me reading the whole of this thread, how's life treating you at the moment? I'll try ever so hard to take your advice, I do much prefer it when the man initiates, especially at the beginning, but I'm so damn impatient it hardly ever works!

And I REALLY like the look of this one!

Hi Sparky, Mousie's not a slut

My date is still on for tomorrow night. Not nervous at all, quite excited but not expecting anything. On paper he is exactly what I'm looking for, hmm, that's a recipe for a let down.

Juicy, I'm going to keep my date to the quieter places if I take him to my usual haunts it's going to be hi, hi etc and inbalance I reckon. I wouldn't warn anyone re gums, if he is around and notices you just give a frosty half smile, that should do the trick.

sparky things are really good atm thanks.
still seeing bloke i told you about a while back,he's met the dcs,folks and all my friends and is a huge hit with all of them tho dd can be tricky still!
despite my initial doubts and looking for red flags i'm now really enjoying being in a relationship again,ok,will confess i'm more than a bit loved up!!
keep yourself occupied and resist the urge to text/call him, at this stage he should be ensuring that he secures this date!
eve behave lol.not necessarily a recipe for disaster,your excitement is a good thing
and
as our lovely dating guru rj would say...
...view it as a night out with some adult company!

That's lovely to hear blondie and I reckon "a bit loved up" is a huge understatement!

He's just texted to say he'd love to talk to me later if I'm free! OMG, am so excited, he has the sexiest voice and uses such long words! Here I go again...

aww that's encouraging!
resist the urge to mention meeting tho if he's as keen as he sounds he'll bring it up

Eve - what?? It wasn't my name change!! I think she should change back too, it's not the nicest name tag.

Last night was... amazing
He arrived with the most beautiful flowers. Honestly no-one's ever done anything like that for me before. Dinner went great. Am a bit worried about giving TMI now but the rest of the evening was good too. I didn't find it easy or feel at all like I used to, but was in control and he was very gentle. It's going to be another week until I can see him - these busy real lives! Feeling so good about him

mousie that's fab!
could this be the next success story of the thread

good morning all!!!

the sun is shining down here & all is well with the world! had a message last night from NS when he was out with his mates - bit odd as I wouldn't usually text him when out with my mates still.... (now should I swing the other way and worry about possessiveness or just roll with it?!)

eve good luck on your date tonight.

mousie - glad it all went well for you, lets hope you're the next sucess story.

blondie - WOW you are loved up lol. can I ask, how long did you take in him meeting your friends/family/kids?

Juicy - good luck with irish.

bint - hiya & welcome back,

ok who's notaslut then?

wonder how lou is getting on!

roll on tonight am really excited & lookin forward to it.

erm i'm not the only one who's a bit loved up by the looks of things eh belle?
it's really great to hear that we're all having a good time lately
where is eve?need the latest pre-date lowdown!!
i think he met my dcs after about 6wks and only when i'd met his family and friends and was satisfied that he was a genuine allround good un iyswim
i originally introduced him as mummy's friend but they soon cottoned on lol prob.cos they caught us having a sly snog!
does this mean your contemplating the big intros with NS?

morning all.

my bro never came round to babysit.ended up stuck in and irish came round.

and he stayed

he swears he's completely unphased by the fact ds was up 3 times in the night and i had to go tend to him.but i suppose we will just have to see if thats really the case... i'm his first experience of seeing someone with dc.

left him sleeping while i get dc ready to go to their dads at noon.

there is plus sides of having very very young dc. my 2 are none the wiser we have a guest in house.

asbm - wow... you have all completely met all the family , his and yours!!

wonder how lou is getting on and eve and notaslut.??

oh and hi sparkly

RJ sounds like things are pretty good at yours - go for it!

I was fairly hopeless in bed last night, I have never been that nervous or unsure before even the very first time ever... I guess that's not surprising though. I just hope he understands. There's something else I need to mention but I might need to name change...

Morning all, seems everyone's in fine fettle. Mousie, he sounds like a gem and I'm sure he had no idea you were feeling hopeless.

Eve, know what you mean about recipes for disaster but don't be too cynical! Enjoy, whatever happens!

We made a date last night, he sounded really pleased! Another long lovely chat and went to bed smiling. I'm really looking forward to meeting him, he looks gorgeous and is clever, interesting and seems kind. He's an ex-airline pilot who suffered a spinal cord injury 10 years ago in a road accident and is in a wheelchair but very fit - did the Paralympics!

Doesn't bother me, what do others think? Was very direct when we first exchanged messages - said I wanted to be able to have a full "physical relationship with someone" eventually and he responded by saying "as long as it doesn't involve standing up I'm absolutely fine!" Seems he has a sense of humour too!

sparkly - wouldn't be a problem for me, but I guess that's an each to their own decision. We all have our issues and limitations, after all. I hope you have a great time when you meet him, it sounds like you are happy and enjoying it. I'm not sure I've "met" you before - is there any more of your story you could share?
I was hopeless and unsure last night because I was raped a few months back, this was the first time since, and I did tell him first, but my usual sexual feelings and behaviour seemed to be absent last night.

The flowers are reminding me very often of what seems to be going on!! and I am SO pleased it's Saturday! (Work is stressful here). DD says "they are lovely, who gave them to you Mummy???"... at 2.9 no secrecy here, then?!

Mousie, so sorry, I must have read through too quickly and misunderstood. Had friends over last night so had to pretend I wasn't reading.

That's ok eve, and now I've screwed up my own name change... if any of you feel inclined I have a (not very now due to trying to look after DD and MN at the same time) name changed thread there....

Under lauraleigh, that is.

laura, it can get better with practise. Sorry about your ordeal previously.

Sparky it wouldn't worry me if I liked someone.

Well I was silly last night and drank far too much wine. Look awful today and I have to meet this guy for the first time. Got some eyedrops and hope a little more sleep might make me look OK again. Any tips?

oh eve lol
ysl's touche eclat works a treat
rj
mousie don't be too hard on yourself after what you've been thru i think you're really brave to talk about it on here.if nm is as nice as he sounds he will help you thru this
and yes i guess lou is otherwise still engaged
sparky that's brilliant news bet you feel so much better that you held out for him to do the asking!!

oh and RJ had thought about msn-ing you but i guess you're otherwise engaged too

Hope there is much fun being had!!

I think too much - just put dd down for a nap - time I had one too after limited sleep last night.

asbm - he is not quite nm yet because I am trying somewhat unsuccessfully to break my too fast too soon cycle...!!!

After all this and he just cancelled . Rearranged for tomorrow so will see if he makes it, if not then we won't meet.