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Where have all the fit and interesting men gone part ELEVEN

1000 replies

lou33 · 21/07/2009 20:36

dollparts he messaged me through a dating site i forgot i was on

OP posts:
sincitylover · 24/08/2009 18:17

he sounded mortified btw. He seems to be the sort of man you could 'train' IYKWIM Whether I want to train him remains to be seen

As opposed to those who when you pull them up they don't do anything.

Janos · 24/08/2009 18:17

Heels definitely ok! And size 14 is not huge either. You're about my size.

Your suggestions of jeans, nice top and heels is a good one.

And yes being nervous is normal (part of the fun I think).

You'll do fine!

Janos · 24/08/2009 18:17

Too right scl. Milk it for all its worth I say!

ninah · 24/08/2009 18:20

yes amenable to training is fine as long as it's the finer points only
we have dc already
hope you get a lovely surprise!

thesouthsbelle · 24/08/2009 21:28

good evening all - isn't it a jolly day hmmm.... lol. have just seen gymboy, arranged a date for tomorrow and got a really cute smile as well - am a happy chappy, oh and he sent me a text after to say (and I quote ' you looked well hot in the gym then' ) ahhhh all together now. date tomorrow i'm picking him up from his so will take the opportunity to pounce and see what his moves are like!

Having fun - i'm size 14 - well jsut sliming into a 12 but only with a muffin top, and am 5'2, I always wear smart jeans, boots and a smart dressy top for a frist date, second date has the same but not such a smart top, third date - well that's tomorrow, erm not sure, suppose i'd better carry on making an effort! it looks fine thou, the heels will slim line your body a bit more if that makes sence, at least that's waht I find as it makes your legs look longer instead of stumps (like mine!) agree first date should be when you're child free, (or at least can be home after 11 with free babysitters) and also agree somewhere public, tell at least 2 people where you're off to with his number as well as getting them to ring you (or at least I pop out to the loo every half hour/hour just to text my mate that all is going OK and am safe) she's fully used to it now dating rules, not really any from me, jsut don't expect that they'll be the same in RL as they are online/over the phone, i've been on plenty of dates where they're the total opposite, and if you don't get on be honest about it with yourself as well. no point settling for second best when our prince is out there somewhere. Re family baby sitting, I ask mum to sit (I know this will sound stupid) but mum sits and I say to her i'm out with a friend, but always say where I'm going, then I tell my friend that mums sitting & that i'll text her, usually then i'll come clean to mum and tell her - I usually go to a place 2 mins away and also drive myself so don't have to worry too much, plus friend's other half usually is v good and will come down if needed)

scl - agree witht he others make him suffer a bit, n milk it! but only in a jokey way. also are we not meant to only be after these men for their bodies then? are we suppose to like the mind bit as well?? - bummer!

Lou - OMG 30 mins of badgering you - did you not ask him if he was desperate or anything, cos I know usually you're not one to mince your words! it's horrid when men do that.

Janos - fingers crossed for your new chappy.

rj - OMG seriously MIL types don't think that do they?? i'm of the view take me as you find me or bugger off (but obv more politely than that! ) diplomacy & tact of course but you get the jist. ho hum... will see, apparently his dad's not right keen on english people so could you imagine his eldest boy, son n aire being corrupted by an english gal! lol.

Anyhow hope everyone's having a good night.

thesouthsbelle · 24/08/2009 21:30

oooh ok far too many smileys for one post...oops. blame the gymboy!

Remotew · 24/08/2009 22:05

Southbelle, you sound very girly over gymboy, good sign, hope it goes well.

lou33 · 24/08/2009 22:05

no he didnt badger me for 30 mins, i spent 30 mins lecturing him on why it was a no go

OP posts:
thesouthsbelle · 24/08/2009 22:38

yeah too girlie - it's not good. i'm not a girlie girl person. still tomorrow night is operation show me ya moves.... lol.

lou - did he finally get the message then? I assume you'd never go back there even if things were different?

thesouthsbelle · 24/08/2009 22:40

sorry got the wrong end of the stick there.

lou33 · 25/08/2009 00:54

i am not sure if he has , i think so

OP posts:
lucy1001 · 25/08/2009 06:11

Morning
I have been trying match.com and PA. All i have really had is some bloke emaillingif I wanted to go for a drink and some 'fun' afterwards?! I politely reclined! Does it normally take a while to find someone worth chatting too?!

ridingjoker · 25/08/2009 08:07

lucy - you have to send out messages too. dont just sit and wait on them. if you perve see someone you think you would like to chat to.. send him something witty... that has a question as it gives him something to respond to.

lucy1001 · 25/08/2009 08:27

rj- Have been sending quite a few messages myself with questions etc so fingers crossed!

thesouthsbelle · 25/08/2009 08:31

yeah I usually find that there's some rotton ones before you find a good en as it were. the pervy ones I just ignore.

is it me thou or does anyone else feel it's a bit like shopping and then the first date is a bit like an interview, or is that just my nerves?

lucy1001 · 25/08/2009 08:52

it feels very like shopping just going through pages of men

ninah · 25/08/2009 09:13

what I hate is the email matches they send, you get a page of miserable looking middle aged men which are considered to be your perfect match
depressing

thesouthsbelle · 25/08/2009 09:19

true enough. I think we should name the badens so others don't have to put up with their rubbish.

ninah · 25/08/2009 09:24

I didn't find any bad uns as it were
just the kind of men with black ash furniture who haven't bought music since the 80s
shop at brantano
etc
and all their desperate gurning faces is a bit much before breakfast

thesouthsbelle · 25/08/2009 09:29
Grin
ridingjoker · 25/08/2009 09:42

rofl. you girls do make me laugh.

south - sadly some mil do think that. my mother who was a single mother of 5 kids still used to when my brother got involved with single mothers. even though she was one herself ... but she was of the idea once single mother you shouldn't really see anyone else...... however her resolve has softened somewhat since i became a single mother. had to point out to her that there's a difference between involving a stream of men into your dc lives and fucking them up.... to dating, and keeping the dc seperate until your sure who your dating isn't just looking to dip his wick and bugger off.

my mum did eventually see someone else..... but we never met him for 4 yrs of him seeing him

lucy - perhaps a change in site? or change in your profile. CAT me if you want and give me your profile name if you want me to give it the once over. i'll give you mine too if want. although i'm hidden at the moment.

ninah · 25/08/2009 10:09

hidden rj?! beachbum is your nm, not so???

lucy1001 · 25/08/2009 11:18

ninah- know what you mean. Is v depressing.
rj- will have a look at my profile then CAT you with the new improved one!

sincitylover · 25/08/2009 14:32

well we had a really nice evening. He will take me out when I can get free for dinner to make up for birthday. He got me a bottle of wine - had tried hard - got the type I like.

So forgiven for now.

Will try to see him next week (won't be easy) and then he's on hol for 2 weeks.

I know that feeling of looking at pages of similar looking men. When I first started used to depress me. But eventually got over that and managed to weed out a few.

ridingjoker · 25/08/2009 14:58

wont give him nm title till we've had any sort of exclusivity chat. which i dont see occuring till he's been on holiday.

but i've not been online since i started seeing him that wkd...but i seen from "favourites" date stamp neither had he and he's been on hidden since then too as doesn't come up on search.

scl - you better take him up on that dinner and book a baby sitter for it.

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