Where have all the fit and interesting men gone part ELEVEN

[lou33]

dollparts he messaged me through a dating site i forgot i was on

sorry no help there then

OK will wait, not my style to be pushy but I have been too laid back recently.

Ninah, you have been seeing him a while so perhaps the flaws have developed organically so to speak. It either goes one way or the other. I have always put my DC first and will continue to do so for another year or so.

If you are feeling hemmed in then perhaps it's the right way to go, going back to dating and leave that bloody calculator at home. lol

I wish you could find out about the flaws instantly! it is all such a waste of time getting to know someone and then deciding over time they are a jerk
I am thinking if only he'd sucked his thumb or something in the first fortnight!
We have both been trying to recreate a traditional relationship when we don't have the material
then I will go away with him shag him and lose clarity all over again
what about the other pof man? message him instead?

haha bloody thumb sucking ha.

right off to try sleep with my sore back

night all.

slightly improved thank you, but still blah

back still playing up as well

darkhorse is coming over tomorrow night with a leather reclining chair for me, and to help me take kids out on thurs (if back can stand it)

Oh god ninah - not sure what you're friend hoped to achieve by saying that - I think I would have been a bit more diplomatic.

RJ - doubt my exh would rally round in a crisis either. More about him in a minute.

Lou - sorry to hear - hope you can go out thurs

eve - prof could be talking to others yes but hopefully will come back to you. Is he an academic? Personally would never go near an academic again - sorry jmo

Have two issues going on atm - exh is looking after dcs this week (we split school holiday in two) - on his terms of course and is moan, moan, moaning. I even gave him a lift home last night so he wouldn't be too late for the nanny but it crossed my mind that I am curtailing my hours to suit his and newp's timetable. Technically he should still have dcs staying over with him this week.

He has offered to have them one night this week but ds2 really doesn't want to stay over leading to next dilemma - when can I see samename again - it would have been that night but am not going to force ds2 to stay so think will just say to samename come over and take your chances I may or may not be alone.

Otherwise will not see him until weekend after next. He seems OK about it but it just seems so much effort.

My parents are also having a family do at end of Sept and I asked whether I could bring a guest and my df reacted really badly saying - he wanted to relax and where would guest sleep!! Samename was a bit upset about that as was I. I am also visiting my parents at end of August but just me and dcs.

well it made me think
he is with his batchelor friend who disliked me on sight or the fact of me so no doubt he is hearing similar, have not heard from him at all since he went, he was all lovey dovey beforehand but in a kind of oh that's what she wants to hear way
whereas I prefer honesty, caught him out in a coupla white well not lies but vagaries
it's raining and he's in a tent
you are right in putting ds2 first and samename will fit around this
you seem quite keen on him now
at your father and the sleeping arrngements - how old are we??? you may find that once he has had time to process the request he may react more favourably, after all it's a fair way away. Maybe samename could meet them for a cuppa, short visit, first? Less daunting perhaps esp if sleepover involved

yes exactly how old are we? Unfortunately they live eighty miles away (and on another planet ) so a short visit is out of the question.

His reaction was amazing.

To answer your question yes samename has grown on me and my feelings for him and the overall thing (apart from the logistics of course) don't cause me any stress as some of my other relationships have !!

ooh scl. Is he your bf??!

and that reminds me of when I took bf back to parents after marriage split up and how awkward it was - there was no question of sleeping there
I think he was the first Nigerian they had ever met which did not help

not sure if he is bf really tho we have been seeing each other for quite a while now.

My parents have always been a bit odd - they sort of live in their own little bubble circa 1950s

Mine used to but I think my succession of exotic lovers helped shock them out of it
Worth a try ...

ooh ninah would love a succession of exotic lovers

lol have embraced the Celts in my 20s - RJ - love a Scotsman - had a bf from Stonehaven and then couple of years later a lovely guy from Bearsden, Glasgow. Met both in London.

Fond memories here of a Brazilian called Fabio, great dancer. It was only as he learned to speak English that our relationship began to founder

rofl

@ fabio

i am partial to a foreign bloke. think i've only had 3 scots boyf in my time.

scots guys are a breed of there own. completely different from any other nationality. but very nicey,nicey i find sometimes.

ninah - i do have a penchant for shocking my mother with foreign boyf. she keeps saying she wonders when i will keep one long enough to learn the whole language. got quite far with italian. sadly not fully fluent .lol

at present of my bunch i'm talking to their is yorkshire, canadian, 2 scots.lol.i have my brother coming round on friday and have to date at least 1 so i can eliminate some . might try and squeeze in 2.lol.

Hi everyone,

ridingjoker, I hope you are ok?

Lou, hope you get out tomorrow.

I am finding it very difficult to keep up with who is talking to/dating whom! I think I am going to have to reread great chunks of these posts again

What does nm mean?

new man
is a poss prelude to bf boyfriend
and then of couse comes dp
fwb is friend with benefits

ninah, thank you I knew it would be obvious. I can be so dim

well no, it's just that there are a lot of categories
although quite possibly not enough
nmp new man on probation?
jl just looking?

i am hoping to get out too

darkhorse is coming over later to assist me

despite my back i have managed to thoroughly clean my bathroom, do some laundry and change my bedding , plus set the kids to some chores

now i should be taking my recycling to be disposed of but i may leave that tonight, and just get on with dinner

[ any excuse to check out kelly]]

hi all

docs say i've jarred my back. should be getting better from friday. if not to go to A &E for xrays. hopefully wont need to do that.got some fab pain killers in meantime.

so.... one guy we'll call mirror guy who i haven't even met yet has been telling me he thinks i should give up horse riding as he's "worried"... and being a bit manipulative in him convo.... saying "lets not meet as your not open enough with me".. bla bla... so told him it was all off and now he's desperate to get our friday date back on.......... confirm with me.... this is classic red flag for emotionally abusive and we haven't even met isn't it?

BigT has been a bit ho-hum about it all. he's finally realised it's proper injury so i'm subtly dropping hints he should jack in work early tonight and come look after me.... to which he's regarding as a joke ..... do i have to be as direct with a yorkshire man as to tell him to get his arse over here with takeaway and dvd????? think i might.

have a pencilled in date with....... em... lets call him beachbum... for friday night if baby sitter plans go as arranged and i'm feeling better.

any excuse to check out kelly

gah

i may as well add this too, seeing as he is topless