Are single dads welcome here?

[Niceguy2]

Hi all

Not sure if I'm welcome here or not...after all, the name is mumsnet! Apologies if I'm not....

How do others cope with being a single parent? I've been a single dad for a while now. My kids are great, my job is great. The only problem I have is how do I meet other people????

Night after night I sit here with nothing but the computer to keep me sane! I need to make new friends but how?? I don't have any babysitters, I can rely on a friend occasionally but I don't like to ask for fear of imposing.

Striking up conversations with other women at school are out. They're all in little cliques and assume you're trying to chat them all up! Blokes just don't understand my position.

I've tried the whole Internet dating thing but it would seem a lot of women are put off by a single dad. Most without children don't want the hassle. Those with children......prefer men without kids. It would seem I can't win!

Surely I'm not doomed yet?? I'm only 33, have a good job, two well behaved kids. I'm surrounded by happy couples everywhere I go! Arrgh!!!

Hello and welcome, fellow single parent here, how many children do you have?

Frustrating, isn't it?

Dads are welcome here.

Oops just re-read, you have 2 dc

Hi, I know exactly what you mean. I am a single mum to 3 children, and I spend pretty much every night in with them. I moved areas and don't really know anyone well, have no family around to babysit and when people ask 'so what are you doing at the weekend' they must think I'm very boring because i never go out! And yet I am a very outgoing sociable person. Don't get me wrong, I wouldn't swap being a single mum, but it IS very difficult to find time to be you as well as parent.

hi niceguy2!!
yes it is Mumsnet but dads welcome too
sorry that you're feeling a bit lonely with your situation
and to a certain extent i think lone parents are largely assumed to be women
and yes can imagine the school thing too as know a particular lone dad
but er he is trying to lol!!
regarding internet dating
don't know what site you're using but i would say hang on in there
i wouldn't be put off by a man having kids to me its a plus actually
i feel that you're more understanding of my situation and less likely to expect too much from me as you would know where my priorities lie
i have never found that it put men off me thou have sometimes wondered with some if they see us as easy?
have been out with man who wasn't a parent but wanted to be and to be settled down
my current BF has dcs but they live with his exw so he obviously sees them at w/e when mine are with their own dad
so yes therein lies another problem which we're working on!!
as i said feel free to join in
tbh we all love a male POV!!

Hello

Yes men are welcomed but nobody uses mN as a dating site, just to be aware of that - it's kind of frowned on!

But we will happily talk to you. Come on in.

A man with kids would not put me off either.

Most men I know or have chatted to thru online dating have DCs, although as someone else said they usually reside with ExW

One thing that would put me off (and I try to avoid doing this myself ie talking about ex issues or slagging them off) would be someone with consuming issues around access and/or ex. And it shows straightaway IKWIM.

I try to keep those sorts of things off the dating arena at least initially.

Or anyone who appears to be desperate for a partner/wife replacement.

why can't he Helen lol?

I am sure people have met though mumsnet - you never know you might find the woman of your dreams here.

Keep chatting though and go to your local meet ups - just for a change of scenery if nothing else.

Nice to meet you.

Thanks for the welcome.

Helen you made me laugh. You see, thats exactly the problem I have! As soon as I speak to a woman they automatically assume I am trying to get in their knickers!

Right now I need friends who are in the same situation as me. I'm not some randy man looking to sow his wild oats......not today anyway

well you're making quite alot of us laugh for sure
please feel free to add your bit to any of the threads on here
as ive said like to see the male POV

Good, good - well I didn't assume you wanted to get into mine, as I am not very attractive and you'd think I was a cynical old bint

But your OP was all about how internet dating isn't working for you, so I figured it was wise to drop in a little warning just in case...

btw I am in a similar position, and are you free on Saturday>?

any parent with something interesting to say is welcome here.

As a single parent myself I would think a man with children (not married!) was the ideal partner so I don;t think you can have burnt your boats yet.

depending on where you are in the UK www.singlewithkids.co.uk does lots of meet ups and quite a few are single fathers. They also arrange holidays/weekends etc.

You might find you live in an area of active Mumsnetters (look at the local boards) or meet-up section of the main board.

We in SW london meet regularly and although no men amongst us yet, I can imagine anyone would have a problem with you joining in.

hehe lol!!
saw this coming

sorry should say "I can't imagine imagine anyone would have a problme"!

Saw what coming?

Saw what coming?

Hi Kew

OK namechanger - who are you?

Oh sorry Kew I'm fa

I keep forgetting about this disguise!

fa as in fl att?

yes

My DP is a single dad whose kids live with him (well him/his sister) My dad was left a single dad with resident kids when his ExW cheated and left.. so IMO you are more than welcome here and as long as you can sympathise with women struggling to breastfeed, questions about kids misbehaving, or errant DP/DH's who can't keep it in their pants, you will find a niche here lol.

Good luck and prepare to have your eyes opened to the world of girlies
Maybe you will learn some useful stuff as well, might even help you with your dating thing

TIP:

you can hide the breast feeding threads...

ah come on now girls we're all wanting to see pic of niceguy2
me especially
lordy maybe i've OD a bit on the old internet dating thing malarkey?