where the hell do u find a good man

[starscream]

where have they all gone

My first ever date from pof was with a 28 year old (I'm 39). I'd been with exdh for 17 years so forgot how to go on. Anyway, he was really intelligent, conversation flowed. I took him to the train station and as he was waiting to board said "do you want a kiss then?" We had a quick snog was nice enough but I didn't fancy him. I just thought it was the least I could do?

He still texts saying when am I going to run away with him I chat to him on msn and we're good mates though and he knows I'm with someone.

I always went for older guys..exdh is 52 this year and the one I dated longest from pof is 53 this year. But new guy is 41 and he's the best of the best

see I think that's a part of things as well LD - ime, ie. i'm 26 XH was 6 months younger than me - and the only BF i've had around my age. (bar my first real love) other than that they've always been at least 6/7 years older.

anyhow, those i've been talking to now, have ranged in age from 23-42, 23 - was literally out for one thing & what he could get (but was v sly in how he approached things - not that I gave anything away) the 42 year old was upfront in what he wanted (didn't get it either) but have found those around 34-36 ish is right for me at the mo - they don't seem to be just after one thing - ime thou. so there's the trial and error on that front as well.

I'm on POF and DD.

Personally I'd be up for meeting more people socially and seeing how it goes. I'm not the sort of bloke to jump on anything vaguely female at the first available opportunity - I feel a bit insulted if I think people think that of me! I've got more than my fair share of female friends and they'd all testify that I'm not the human equivalent of the leg-humping dog!

Yeah, it would be nice to think I would end up meeting someone and being with them the rest of my life, but for starters a bit of companionship, being together and a partner in crime would be nice.

Sex? Well - it's got me in the mess I find myself now hasn't it?

are you going to post your username Lostdad? so we can have a nosey lol

I don't actually know what POF or DD are, can someone explain? But in the interest of someone abusing work time to be here, can you not post your photos etc here please so I can have a nosey? Horrid work don't let us access dating links, can't imagine why!

As loneparents, would you all steer clear of other LPs because you know the problems many of us have with out baggage/exes/money/issues etc? Just wondering if,having been in this situation yourself, does it make you wary of potential partners with similar problems cos you know how bad things can get? Or does it give you a common ground? On a really selfish note would we all avoid people with complicated pasts in favour of the unencumbered? Not saying it's right, I am thinking of beginning this route myself when I'm ready and I am curious how people decide what they want.

MascaraOHara - maybe, later!

POF is Plentyoffish and DD is Direct Dating.

Personally I am not worried if a future partner of mine has kids - although I would like to think that I would have more kids. My ex won't allow me to watch my son grow up and I'd like to think I would with another; besides thought I would have a couple eventually!

In the back of my mind is the thought that if I do end up with a LP she understand how things more than a starry-eyed type who has never had to think of this sort of thing.

I wouldn't say my past is complicated...I was a father and husband one day and the next I wasn't. Simple as that.

Some of us do have complicated pasts though lostdad, put like that yours seems straightforward but I guess you'd agree that that "simple" turn of events had a profound effect on you. So someone else who'd been through a similar situation might be the absolute best person because of the empathy thing or they could be the worst choice ever because two complicated situations doesn't make one simple one!

In the end I guess it's either right or it's not, regardless of background/age/whatever.

oh err, lost dad.. sound like all the ladies here are on a promise now!

I just checked my emails at lunchtime and I have 2 messages on sites from people I was chatting to.. can't pick them up until I go home tonight... no fair! it's quite exciting.

dtm, i am not talking to 100 people, i was just saying there is nothing wrong with doing so , lol

don't lie Lou.

lol hush you!

just admit it.. you pushing the 100 mark on a quiet day

I want to pick up my messages lol.. will be a long wait until dd is in bed tonight.

lol, hey lou I learnt all I know about internet dating from you and zippi! lol. (ok aunty did help a little as well!)

LD - ooh go on what's your DD name? i'm on there so let me have a butchers - might have passed you on my travels! lol.

tippy - my current chap has a son of 7, it doesn't bother me at all that he's a lone parent, doesn't bother him that I am, at least we both know what it's like to have children and to have ex's with the children iycwim. tbh, I did see a chap who had a duaghter but didn't feel like her dad as he'd not seen her in about 10 years - it was a sorry state of affairs but then again he couldn't understand my relationship with XH nor why DS came first in my life, and I want someone who understands it all to be a part of my life & walk in my direction - not pull me in a different one.

lol dont learn too much from me, i am still single after all!

( i do have date on saturday tho, but not from pof)

rofl at learning anything about internet dating from me

i think i had at least half a dozen guys who wanted dates but i ended up suspecting they were married

apart from that i only had two guys

tho i spoke to quite a few online

some dont want to really ever get off line

and one of my dates was sex only and he was an arrogant twat but i did have the final word lol

ah but now you are all loved up and have a man!

lol - see that's what I learnt - how to spot those who are only after one thing (thanks to your help with the sailor - who is & was my no one man! even if he's a total and utter tosser - was sexy as fuck thou! lol) on wards n upwards!

all these dating sites are getting in the way of my MNing. I think I'm going to get RSI in my fingers. Where is Nutty.. want to know how she is doing too

yes, where is she?

you lot been scaring nutty again

we need to put out a search party

we have not! hopefully she's on POF chatting to a lovely man.

bet she's inundated!

Haven't heard anything from the one i emailed. And it is showing as read.
Better keep looking!