Ok, I lied, I am bothered about not having a bloke, infact it is driving me nuts

[CrackerOfNuts]

When ever anyone asks me if i'd like to meet someone, I say no. If they suggest dating sites, speed dating etc, I say that I am not interested, am happy as I am, and it is such a huge lie.

Not sure what ti says about me though, that I am so desperate for some male company.

I just so hate being single.

I know i stand no chance of meeting anyone either, not at the mo.

Nutty, have you always had self esteem problems or is it a recent thing?

I've been on mn for about 3 years now & for as long as I've been reding your threads it's been the same, which is really sad.

You're just round my age aren't you? I'm 30.

You state very clearly you don't fancy a pd course... would you think of something similar, not a learning course, just something to get you out & meeting people, with no pressure to do homework etc?

I am a crap mother, I do as little as possible with them at the mo, and even talking to them seems to be such a huge job.

I don't relax until they are in bed and i can sit in the quiet on my own and watch tv.

reading

I agree with others in that you really need to work on your confidence first. You sound very negative when you talk about yourself.

I don't drive either - it is just something I never got round to, and my sense of direction is so shocking that I fear I would be permanently lost somewhere if I drove!! It has never appeared to put men off in the slightest though. It is just an inconvenience for me, so I really should think about lessons too!

Not sure what the answer is where meeting a man is concerned. I always seem to meet people when I am not looking to, so I am sure someone will come along when you're least expecting it.
Think you really need to work on your confidence first, and just learn to feel happy with yourself.

I don't fancy it because I know that I couldn't even get to the course, i'd cancel before it even got to the day.

Have to go a sec, am on the verge of tears and I don;t want ds to se me upset.

oh please dont be upset..

what is it about the hen weekend that youre dreading? i would be looking forward to it with all my might!

charliecat and i are thinking we might come and kidnap you for a girls night out one day

make you get out and have some fun

Yep and im gonna see if harman would be roped in too...if you would have us

or rent one and club him

lol

A lot of people find it difficult going out and socialising. Even people without kids.

And when you're with the kids all day, it can be boring. So you feel like you dont have anything interesting to say.

So its very easy to get into that cycle of negative thinking.

Also, as its a rare night out, there is also a bit of pressure to meet the perfect man.

but youre taking some positive steps, driving lessons (a big step) and a new course. They are good conversations with people, "im having driving lessons, and feel a bit scared. Whats it like? etc "im starting a new course, have you heard of it?"

If I had more time, Id love to do volunteering. No commitment and it looks great on cv

How about volunteering to help out at your children's school? I work in a school & we are always grateful of parent helpers.

Sorry guys, had to run off and deal with dd1, as dd2 very kindly opened the bathroom door on her foot and ripped the top half of her big toenail off

Lou, do you know just how scary that sounds to me.

Same goes for volunteering, they are all good suggestions but at the moment i know i'd back out and not go.

I sound like such a weak waste of space I know.

I feel like that girl in casualty.

sounds like you're your own worst enemy, and you've got yourself caught up in a vicious circle.

There's only so much help people can offer, without you having to get up and helping yourself, nothing will happen.

yes nutty i do, thats why i wanted cc to post it but she said i had to!

we arent scary tho, unless we have to be

Oh no, I realise that too, and I definatly am my own worst enemy, but it is so hard to explain that I get so nervous about so many things that I literally cannot do them.

I have given up on so many things in my life because I got too nervous, even things as a child.
I was in an a big band thingy, and I was a colour guard (routines with flags) and I dropped out, not because i didn't like it, i loved it, but because for the one show, they wanted me to lead out onto the arena and I simply couldn't do it.

I gae up on guides because I was chosen to be the hostess at one particular event, and meet and greet the guests. I dropped out the week before and never went back.

That theme has continued througout my life since.

It would be fab nutty.
We are all nice, honeslty, with good hearts.
And we are all single.
And we have all been on MN for YEARS.
It would be great.

Cheer up hunny pie, there are loads of advantages of being on your own, less washing and washing up to do? Smaller bills to pay? go to bed wen u want? watch what u want etc etc im on my own with two children and i bloody love it! im happy to be a singleton. take care

Volunteering or starting a new course is a MASSIVE step. Can you try just the once, and give yourself a treat for doing it?

Don't see it as a commitment, just see it as trying the once.

yes, and you wouldnt be able to cancel on account of the effort we would have made getting sitters and driving there

You need to end that theme then nutty.
Just imagine how you would feel completing something.........

Can I agree to think about it once I have seen my gp then Lou ? There is no way I am up to it at the mo.

This will make you all laugh. I actually started online food shopping, not because it is easier, but because it meant I didn't have to get the bus to the store, speak to people in the store etc etc.

See, told ya all i was nuts.