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Original poster

Am thinking of starting internet dating in the new year.(gulp) I need tips, advice, sites to look at etc etc.

199 replies

ATortIsForLifeNotJustChristmas · 27/12/2007 22:08

Of couse i may still chicken out! But it really would be nice to at least start chatting to a man(or two!!)!

OP posts:
SantaBabyBeenAnAwfulGoodGirl · 31/12/2007 21:43

try pof as it's free i found it much better than the guardian and love and friends both paid

i was chatting with the guy who took me away for the we about this and his take was why pay when u dont have to and there are a lot of people on pof you just have to weed out the decent ones but it boosts ur ego cos there are so many you get messages and replies

and there are normal nice people

nannynick · 01/01/2008 13:29

There are normal nice people on POF - I'm on it

From the male point of view, I have yet to meet anyone via POF, but have met one person via DatingDirect - though that was many years ago.

SantaBabyBeenAnAwfulGoodGirl · 01/01/2008 13:33

lol well thats two of us

i do find you can spend an awfully long time on not a lot tho..i am emailing a guy at the mo and it is like wading thru mud...not sure if it's actually going to get anywhere

tho i have got considerably further with another nice guy so not too bothered

it seems a lot slower than meeting someone in rl tho maybe distance plays a part as they arent down the local

Mamazon · 01/01/2008 13:38

im on Plenty of fish too...after seeing a thread about it here actually.

ive not met anyone yet but i have spent many a bored evening chatting away to pleasant (if unsuitable) men.

i have found it has given me a bit of a confidence boost to log in and find a few messages telling me i look lovely or sound funny.

of course they undoubtedly say that to everyone but still....makes a change to hear it said about me.

i am actually in the process of agreeing my very first meet up with a guy. I am absolutly bricking it lol

SantaBabyBeenAnAwfulGoodGirl · 01/01/2008 13:45

i agree it is a confidence boost..i have had brief or longer contacts with loads...

i have one left over from the guardian that i want to meet as we talk on msn a lot just chatting and rubbish..don't think either of us see it as potential date..but we have kind of progressed to internet friends..we do have the odd bit of talk about sex but mostly we just chat..in a good humoured kind of way

but as we have been chatting since about august it will be strange meeting

also the confidence extends into real life i went to a party a couple of weeks ago and it was less bad talking there because i have been doing it online..there is a guy i met then who wants to go out with me but i don't particularly want to but he is very keen..i might meet his a friend tho to practice my french lol

SantaBabyBeenAnAwfulGoodGirl · 01/01/2008 13:47

gosh mamazon i just looked at ur profile i had no idea u were young and looked stunning babe

Mamazon · 01/01/2008 13:52

lol hardly, if i were i wouldn't still be single 3 years on.
but thank you for the compliment

yes i am much more conifdent when out as well now.
before if i went out with friends i would have a dance and if a guy came over i woudl turn around or go back to my seat, now im more inclined to chat to them even just to politely say thanks but no thanks.

nannynick · 01/01/2008 14:03

I totally agree with SantaBaby... you do look a stunner Mamazon - I'd go on a date with you Pity I'm some distance from your location - though some parts of your county are only an hours drive.

arionater · 01/01/2008 14:29

Well I joined match only last Thursday and met someone for the first time on Sunday morning for coffee - no romantic potential for me I don't think but he was really nice, and it is confidence boosting getting messages and so on - the site says that men and women contact each other equally but I think the men are still more likely to make the first move! Definitely second the advice to keep your profile short (funny if you can, but otherwise just brief - so many of them are much too long and very similar to each other). Re: ages I put a big age range on (28-48 I think; I am 27), but that's partly because I would like to meet someone at least a bit older, and career-wise I am quite advanced for my age and I think older men are less likely to be put off by that. I think generally the less narrow you are about things like age, the more responses you'll get, and you can always ignore/block/politely decline! There seem to be loads of teachers on there - but maybe it's just that they're all e-mailing me! (not sure why . . .)

Mamazon · 01/01/2008 14:36

my profile is awful but every attempt to change it makes me sound either very boring or just big headed.

very envious of those of you who just jump straight in to meeting people. i am terrified lol

And NannyNick, thank you.

Original poster
ATortIsForLifeNotJustChristmas · 01/01/2008 16:09

May join POF aswell.
Tonight is definatly the night i join! I could do with a confidence boost lol!

Still can't think of what to put in profile.

Do i need a new email address? Do you use normal MSN addy?

So much to think about!

OP posts:
arionater · 01/01/2008 16:30

Tort - at least on match people write to your 'match' e-mail address and that just gets forwarded to your normal one so I don't think you need a new one (though I suppose you might want to create one for giving to people if you wanted to be closer contact but weren't yet comfortable with your regular one). Well I've spent the last four days reading loads of profiles (albeit men's ones) - it's a terrible time-waster - and I think short and positive is good - at least if it's brief you can't really decide you don't like them! Can you browse and look at a few other people's before writing your own? I think it's a really good time to give it a go because so many people join now in the spirit of the new year. One thing I noticed - and I hope no-one takes this the wrong way - the black men on match seem much better at writing their profiles, funnier and more engaging on average, no idea why though . . .

Original poster
ATortIsForLifeNotJustChristmas · 01/01/2008 17:02

At least my email addy isn't my rl name which i guess is a good thing.
I will have a read of some profiles once dc are in bed.
I have a yahoo email that is only for freecycle which i could use if need be.

OP posts:
Janos · 01/01/2008 17:22

I've just signed up for POF after reading about it on here.

Didn't think about it too much, just went for it. Should be interesting..

TheDuchessOfNorksBride · 01/01/2008 17:45

Shamelessly plugs woome.com which my company designed.

SantaBabyBeenAnAwfulGoodGirl · 01/01/2008 17:47

oh that site is ageist tho

TheDuchessOfNorksBride · 01/01/2008 17:53

But you can search/filter by age.

Original poster
ATortIsForLifeNotJustChristmas · 01/01/2008 21:13

OK. DC are finally all in bed!
User name StartingOver2008 ??
Oooh i am scared lol!

OP posts:
Original poster
ATortIsForLifeNotJustChristmas · 01/01/2008 21:47

User name already in use!
Back to the drawing board!

OP posts:
Original poster
ATortIsForLifeNotJustChristmas · 01/01/2008 22:06

OK name sorted! lol!

OP posts:
Mamazon · 02/01/2008 13:48

maybe we should start a secret thread where we reveal our usernames and then get feedback from each other on our profiles.

on the other hand i would hate for you all to see just how sad and desperate i am .lol

midorimum · 02/01/2008 14:50

names and reviews of lots of dating sites....

www.reviewcentre.com/products677.html

and free dating sites.....

www.reviewcentre.com/products4055.html

Rocklover · 02/01/2008 20:57

I am on Dating Direct, you have to pay, but it is better than match...far more people on it. I am having great fun!!

Parsleypants · 02/01/2008 21:44

Can we share info about which men are poison and should be avoided at all costs?!

tortoise · 02/01/2008 22:24

I will have a look at dating direct.
Got my 1st match.com email with matches to my info i gave!
One looked ok but none of the others were any good lol!