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Support for essbee

400 replies

anorak · 10/09/2004 15:12

For our lovely essbee to post whenever she feels down and wants to chat, and for anyone else who wants to be here for her....

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Are your children’s vaccines up to date?
essbee · 13/09/2004 20:06

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zubb · 13/09/2004 20:18

essbee, just caught up with this thread. I hope that talking to your sister tomorrow helps, but if not then it seems that you have plenty of friends around who want to be there for you.

I would like to echo serenequeen and rowlers - you have come through so much recently, and done so well, and I really hope that things get better soon.

essbee · 13/09/2004 20:21

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zubb · 13/09/2004 20:25

Exactly, at least you'll have tried. Where is she going?

essbee · 13/09/2004 20:26

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midden · 13/09/2004 20:40

just seen this essbee, had no idea - not sure what to say but lots of hugs and here for you xxxx

jodee · 13/09/2004 20:49

Dear Essbee, I just wanted to tell you what a wonderful human being you are! I missed the other thread and can't begin to understand how you are feeling, but keep on posting, and remember that your burdens are never too heavy for Mumsnetters to carry. J xxx

essbee · 13/09/2004 21:05

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soapbox · 13/09/2004 21:25

Essbee - I always feel so useless on threads like this as I'm just not sure what I can say that hasn't been said before.

I am so sorry that you are feeling so crap and although I've been through the whole divorce thing, it was before I had children and TBH I think it must be much worse when you have them to worry about too.

I did have the aresex syndrome though, who thought it was acceptable to stop paying the mortgage and any household expenses. I wasn't living in the house and was paying rent too, but had to find all the mortgage and bill money as according to the buidling society it was joint and several liability which meant I was responsible for his shortfall in payments as well as my own.

But I got all of the money back in the settlement as he had been so unreasonable - but that didn't stop me sweating every time I thought of the debts I was building up! The mortgage compnay were quite understanding about it though - I think they see it all the time

On a practical level is there anything I can do for you? Make phone calls, sort things out, speak to people for you??? It really would be no trouble at all to help you out if there is anything useful I can do. Please please just let me know!

Keep your chin up - this too will pass and you will be a stronger person at the end of it. You will know that you have looked at the camel's arse of the world and yet managed to stand up and walk again and you will in time be immensely proud of yourself for being able to do so

Lots of virtual hugs
Jxxx

tigermoth · 13/09/2004 21:31

I really hope that conversation with your sister goes well. Even if she is leaving in six months, that's a long, long way away from now. I am so glad you are attempting to talk to someone - I imagine that takes a lot of courage.

I think soupdragon would be ace at talking to anyone's parents, btw. Firm but fair

essbee · 13/09/2004 21:33

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essbee · 13/09/2004 21:34

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soapbox · 13/09/2004 21:36

Essbee - if you make a list of all the things to be done and give me contact numbers etc then I will make the calls and appointments for you if you want.

I had a very kind friend do all this kind of things for me during my divorce and it would be make me feel I had repaid my debt to her somewhat if I were to pass on her kindness to you.

It really would be no trouble - I can find a quiet office at work and sort it out.

Do let me know

soapbox · 13/09/2004 21:38

Oh - and I am an accountant and can do budgetting spreadsheets etc (not much good at tax I'm afraid but I can fill in a personal tax return)...

tigermoth · 13/09/2004 21:39

oh well if it makes you feel any better, I can match some of your list...
find lost library books, tv licence about to expire, car insurance due next month, cancel dh's mobile phone and pay off bill (lots of letters to dh from orange) talk to mortgage company (again), pay council tax arrears....

one step at a time.

MummyToSteven · 13/09/2004 21:39

essbee - set yourself a target - maybe one per day??? i could look online for mortgage quotes for you if that would help at all. will see if you can get a new licence on line

essbee · 13/09/2004 21:40

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MummyToSteven · 13/09/2004 21:42

essbee - you can pay for the telly licence online:-

www.tvlicensing.co.uk/

essbee · 13/09/2004 21:43

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soapbox · 13/09/2004 21:46

Essbee - of course I would...

You are in a very difficult place right now - you need people to help you get to somewhere better.

Really it would be a pleasure to help you in any way I can!

essbee · 13/09/2004 21:48

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soapbox · 13/09/2004 21:59

Have emailed you...

jampot · 13/09/2004 22:09

I am happy to help with anything as well I know West Bromwich Building Society are doing something like 2.99% fixed for 2 years (not sure of tie in period). Please let me know if I can help with anything./

sobernow · 13/09/2004 22:31

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essbee · 13/09/2004 22:45

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