Bit of background: I have been divorced for a long time, 2 DC, XH lives abroad.
He has barely bothered with the DC for over a year, has not seen them at all and has spoken to them on the phone a handful of times. To add to that he has not paid any maintenance for almost 2 years now and is getting away with it due to his living abroad. I have filled out all the paperwork for a REMO but it is taking forever and a day.
Right, DC and I had made plans for Christmas, Midnight Mass on Christmas Eve, planned our Christmas Day menu and walk, activity for Boxing Day....all lovely.
Tonight XH called to speak to the DC, the first time in literally months. He is apparently booking tickets for them tomorrow to go and see him for the entire Christmas break. The DC are understandably very excited! He is their dad and they miss him.
I am so happy for them that XH has finally shown some interest again and is making the effort to see them. I have been in tears since they have been asleep though. Because he did not have the decency to discuss this with me before breaking the news to the DC I will now be spending Christmas on my own.
Maybe I am being petty, I don't know, but it hurts that he has not bothered - at all! - and I have. Yet, at this precious time of year he gets to barge in and ruin all the plans DC and I had made. I hear you thinking and yes, of course I could tell him to go do one but the DC are at an age where I would be the bad guy if I stopped them going (never have stopped him seeing them, nor would I ever!) and Christmas would not be the enjoyable one we had planned.
I know there is no advice you can really give me but I just needed to get it off my chest. Thank you if you made it to the end!!!