Fed up with not having anyone to share the burdens with.

[Solo]

Bit of a self pitying thread really, but it's taken me a very long time and I can now say with conviction that after being on my own for so long...

I am fed up with the burden of being alone.
I am fed up with struggling on my own.
I am sometimes lonely.
I have no single parent friends or single friends at all and my 'social life' ha! what a joke is visiting my widowed Mum or visiting my Brother.
I miss my Dad terribly.
I can't get a job.
Not one 'friend' has spoken to me so far this summer holiday (except one that lives on cloud fluffyland in her mansion and that really cheers me up because shopping is her passtime!).

I could write a very long list of problems and yes, I know we all have problems, but I just don't want to do it on my own any longer, I don't want to face the problems on my own :( I could cry right now and need a real 'man hug' and I don't care who knows it!

God yes Meglet!! X 1000!! They are slightly better with other adults but will still talk over them if they think I urgently need to know something - normally something utterly banal.

They even talk over each other if i ask how their days were so I am bombarded and then the bickering over who was talking first starts.. pretty exhausting!

I like your explanation though - probably uber true of DS as he's never known me with anyone else. As always - good to know I'm not alone.

DS has perked up and is able to eat (plus no vom overnight so I actually got some rest on his floor unbelievably).. Another day at home though as his rear end is still not right

Frozen on - again!!! I don't want to build a bloody snowman - you don't know what I want to do to that snowman!!

Happy Birthday Solo! !

Cream tea sounds a great idea, enjoy!

The interrupting thing used to happen in our house too - ended up on list of house rules!

I woke up shattered so whilst dd is at her dads I took the chance of an hours kip...only I don't know if I feel worse for it or not... Supposed to be going to see insurgent tonight - just hope I can stay awake for it!

On the interrupting thing - in was having a moan and a friend suggested something she'd seen online which sounds great:

When you're talking, you teach you child to touch your wrist if they want to say something. You then cover their wrist with your other hand to acknowledge them and then when you've finished speaking, you focus on them.. I tried it - just ended up with DD saying 'look, my hand on your wrist.. mummy, I'm doing it - my hands on your wrist.... She just loves to talk so much. Might work with older children?

And a cream tea sounds perfect for your birthday - slightly decadent without breaking the bank. I've just ordered pizza as can't be bothered and figure some stodge will sit well in DS's tum - hope he doesn't prove me wrong!!

Argghhh - someone somewhere spare me from bedtime tantrums

fush is yours (not literally yours) over with yet? I'm on guard duty on the landing to stop dd running amok and hitting her brother while he's asleep. I wish she'd conk out, she's still fiddling with something, I've got some mini eggs to eat.

Did not manage to get a cream tea sadly! but met a friend and had coffee and cake, so that was nice! :)

Must sleep! night all!x

Hi I am full time working single parent. I totally get where ur coming from.
I have bf but e works away 5/7 days a week and lives on his own alsodoesn't want to help with my child.
I pay all my own bills and have minimal money also.
I understand how u feel. I am on anti D's from my previous relationship aswell as having numerous health problems brought on by stress.
Ppl say they understand but they really don't.
Have u tried to go to playgroups/ the park on a Saturday locally to ur house is always a good way to meet ppl and get their number say 'yes am being forward but would u like to meet up one day?' Iv done it and now got very close friends from it. That way u have new friends.
I feel u sweetie least u have the forum now I will watch it if u need a chat!

meeting a friend is even better than cake solo. You can track down a nice cake this week and have it to yourself .

We had an exciting afternoon yesterday, we went indoor climbing with some friends. We had an hour on the main wall with ropes it was really fucking high and then we had an hour on the low bouldering wall without ropes. ds said afterwards that I was the "best mummy ever!". this never happens .

Welcome jean :)

Meglet that sounds great!!

So DS's bug is back with a vengeance - had to collect him from preschool Earl yesterday due to his bottom and then he was sick on himself this morning at brekky Another joy of being on your own - ill children and work just don't mix. Luckily exh has agreed to take DS a couple of hours earlier than he would normally do today - lunch instead of school pickup - so I can get into work this afternoon but once DC are home tomorrow, guess that's the last of my leave used... argh! Anyways, not DS's fault and he is ill (tucking into marmite in toast right now though!!)

Hi Jean - I also do the whole 'be my friend' to random strangers and it's amazing how often it's worked out

Hope everyone else's week is doing better.. amazing news - my friend and her DS are hoping to be home this week

(oh, and F&C name changed here - like to mix it up every now and then as exh definitely knew my original name and whenever I posted something like 'I'm happy' or 'exh is a loser', something bad would happen. Not saying it's necessarily related but better safe than sorry!)

christophe that's a rotten stomach bug he's dealing with.

I've had some nice news, my next ou module is being fully funded and I've got a £200 grant . so I might take the hit on a new laptop, not sure yet. It also means I've got no excuse to keep wandering past the unopened package from the ou with my new study books . It officially runs from April to sept but I'll start flicking through it this week.

Hi Jean - glad you've come along for the ride!

Meg, that's fab news - definitely get the laptop, you wouldn't think twice about getting it for the dc's if they needed one for homework - treat yourself (and you'll kick yourself if your old one destroys your work before submission)

Christope, I really hope that stomach bug goes and does one from your home, you have my every sympathy

Well, you know what they say about the devil making work for idle hands........I got bored the other night, and was feeling fed up about everything....so I filled out a couple of internet dating site forms (but without pics - I'm not that daft!)!!!! I just went for the pay ones so I could see what the local supposedly singles are like without getting too involved (there's no way I'd cough up cash!) and oh-my-dear-God - WHAT DROSS!!!! I am going to be a looooong time single......
The 1st bloke who sent a 'hello' looked like my exFIL, which for some women might be good.....but mine is mid 70's with a shock of white hair who gives the impression of thinking he's still a bit of a chancer .
I then got an Eastern European who lives way too far away to even think about meeting for a drink......and then another bloke who claimed to be self employed, but I think it's code for unemployed.....spent enough time carrying blokes to go down that one again. Don't get me wrong, but after a financially abusive relationship I'm a bit wary of that one....

Ok, ok - I'm probably overly picky, but I've spent years settling for what I thought I was worth - I've realised I've been selling myself short!

Oh God - sorry. Just read that back - I sound a complete bitch.

It wasn't meant that way - just that the only blokes showing me any interest are either 25 years older than me, have no idea of UK geography or make me think they're pushing their luck (I've had too much experience of that)

sorry

fos it was quite funny actually .

Thanks Meg - no harm intended - I guess after reading some other threads people tend to jump on you a bit, and I didn't want anyone to think i was just being goady

I think the lp threads (along with sn) are the ones where no one gets jumped on.

I agree with Meglet - that made me smile. And you are one brave lady.. The thought of online dating fills me with gently panic but does seem to be the way people now find people.. I have to admit, the thought of going out on the pull also fills me with terror so think it's going to be some time before I try again. At least there were no cock shots as I've heard they're pretty rife on those sites

DS hopefully ok - will find out how he got on overnight when I pick him up at lunchtime but thank you all for your kind words.

Oh - and definitely treat yourself to the new laptop Meglet - you will never regret it!!

both me and ds are off sick today. I'm already up to here with minecraft talk.

I wouldn't mind so much if I could play it but it gives me motion sickness.

now we're watching the funeral of Richard III and ds is juggling lego .

I should do something productive like new laptop research.

Ha ha

I also had DS off with me again today and we managed to escape the monotony of watching Cars today and I got the pleasure of pushing him around town in his buggy - he is a dead weight now but he really is pathetic when he's ill!

We got home though and Jake and his interfering bunch of Neverland Pirates was stuck on...

Hope you did decide on a new laptop - are there are Easter sales on or something like that?

Hi there everyone! Hope you're all ok/on the mend.

Well I'd forgotten dd is coming home early from her fathers - forgot he has an event on (and as it's in honour of someone I knew too I'm not going to knock him for it) and then he's away for the week with the only day so far that he's said about having her being Easter Sunday - good job his mother is more understanding about the school hols (as exmil's go, she's been lovely since we split). I have most of next week off, just have to cover monday morning but in theory I can work from home (but have to attempt to set the laptop up for that 1st, so may end up leaving dd for the 1st time for more than an hour on her own.....she'll be fine, I know that, it's just me!!!)
Well, as for the internet dating I'm just glad I didn't part with my cash. I've kept an eye out all week and the sites I went on (2) kept recommending blokes from 90 miles away despite the settings I put in (although to give the desperate sods their due, I did get some interest from a few!!!). The only bloke that lived near that was decent looking didn't have kids at home and wanted someone in my age group who was 10 st - so that's my 13st size 14 with boobs and a bum figure out then and I would wonder about his attitude to women and weight as well (xh had issues with this....). The local 'self employed' bloke got so he was messaging me 2/3 times a day so I blocked him (not that I could read the messages after the 1st one anyway!). I also think he came into my workplace from what I could make out of the photo (he had a 'distinct' look that if you squinted you could make out!!) and if it was him, it really WAS a good idea to block - really not my type (and slightly alarming attitude on meeting him!!!). Luckily I didn't have a photo on so he wouldn't have known it was me..... So I guess I'm destined for growing old disgracefully with 19 cats......
Oh, and for all of you fed up with Disney....

Good luck with the Easter hols - my dd's got to that 'getting more independent' stage - scares the hell out of me!

www.awesomeinventions.com/grumpy-cat-does-disney/

Excuse the language and shouting - I AM SO FUCKING STUPID - THIS WAS WHEN HE WANTED TO TAKE DD OUT OF SCHOOL 2 DAYS EARLY TO GO TO CYPRUS - HE HASN'T GONE AND WHEN I SPOKE TO DD HE'S GOING TO SCOTLAND ON A DIFFERENT 'SUPPOSED' WEDDING. HOW STUPID HAVE I BEEN

There are 2 weddings, mid week on the identical week, both hundreds of miles away from here - BULLSHIT.

After speaking with my dsis I've sent him a text that starts off I'm confused and ends with me asking him straight out if this is the case.

So angry I am shaking........

Oh dear Fos - what do you think he's actually up to? Sounds most peculiar.

I hate that regardless of what it is, you're the one left picking up the pieces, sorting out cover, bolstering DD (although he does sound like she's got her head screwed on straight!)..

How old is she? There is all that furore around children being left on their own at the moment and, given mine are still small, not something I'd really thought about. But am interested in what sort of age as my parents left me to it from a pretty young age tbh - and I figure if they're walking to school & back on their own and playing out with friends, they can probably do a couple of hours at home??

Apparently someone I used to know from our time together is getting married up there......definitely NOT the story he told me originally (and I know I'm not getting confused - certain things were said when it was brought up at the time, and since he has said stuff that contradicts ). This is him back to his gaslighting AGAIN. Why he feels the need to do this God only knows - all it does is confirm what I think of him (and I've sworn enough on here today - sorry

Sorry, forgot to add dd is 12. She's a mature 12 - school buses in, home for an hour before I get home in an evening so I think she'd be ok (and would probably find he still in bed with her ipod tbh!). The neighbours both next door and across the road would keep an eye out and if there was any problems she could go straight round there, they've already said that. I wouldn't leave her in an evening though - that's not something either of us are ready for. She also knows she can ring me (and I would ring her up a couple of time to check). Also my dsis lives in the village and she knows she could pop over to hers as well. I think with me living in a village I'm a bit more ok about it all which I admit is totally irrational!