Facing pregnancy alone?

[thedogsrolex]

There seem to be quite a few threads lately posted by women facing pregnancy alone for whatever reason. I was thinking maybe it would be a good idea to have one ongoing thread for support and advice...what do you think? I know it would have helped me way back when I had dd? (apologies if there is already one, I haven't come across it).

He knows id appreciate it. He knows I'd have waited all day in hope. That it would ruin my day, drag me back down. am I such a bad person that the father of my child and my best friend can't even send a text. What have I actually done to deserve such a rough time of it?!

Happy Birthday Pickles

My ex phoned me on his birthday the first one after we split. He said 'I will have a better birthday this year than I had last year!'
He had brought his internet woman over he left me for at 5 months pregnant.

It was ex's birthday but the same day that my brother accident and died:(

That day made me relaise how nasty this man was and I stopped wanting him back as immediately hated him from that day forth...I was 7.5 months pregnant.

I will have a for you too...next birthday will be the best ever as you will share it with your baby:)

I do feel for you pickles. I struggle every day to accept that my H no longer wants to be with me. What did I do to deserve this?

The truth is that neither of us did anything. We couldn't be what they wanted us to be. My H changed and I didn't and he didnt want me any more.

You refused to bow down and do what your X wanted you to do. You can't be what he wants - which is somebody who will put him before their child.

We have both had a lucky escape, it will just take a while to sink in. But our DD's will love and respect us and will not feel the same way about their dads.

Pickles, it is what Skye says. You didn't do anything. You're not a bad person. He is not your best friend.
I know it's going to take time to sink in, but the person he was no longer exists. He is now an emotionally unattached idiot. Karma will kick his arse.

Your children (I am talking to both of you here) will respect you for not putting them in a position where they are at best tolerated, and at worst resented. They will appreciate what you have done for them. They will look at you and see strong women.

I realise it may not be relevant here but I must briefly touch on someone I know who was abandoned by her 'D' P when pregnant. She had to move back home, but did manage to get housed some time later, when her DS was around 2. With support of friends and family she threw herself into further education and slogged for four years, working p/t to support her DS.
She became closer to a man who was a friend of her family, who knew her story and saw what she'd been through, who saw how she strived to improve things.
Guess what? They just got married!
The moral of this is simply - keep going! Life is full of the unexpected, and you owe it to yourselves to be the best you can, to not be dragged down by useless emotional vampires. You have all the qualities you need to be a superb mother, and are already proving how capable you are.

Lesson ends. :) xxxxx

All your posts really cheered me up this morning. It amazes me how much I feel better. Thank you for taking the time to help me.
Unfortunately I appear to have been poisoned by Chinese. Been up all night, sickness and diarreha. Triage says I need to see how i go and drink lots

Sorry to hear about the dodgy chinese! I had awful heartburn through the last month of my pregnancy. Drink lots of water, yes. If you can manage it, try to eat a bit of bread with some peanut butter, or if that is not sounding helpful, try to eat some apple.
The salt and sugar in the peanut butter will replace any that you have lost with D&V. Apple is good for settling an upset stomach.

I'm off to have a shower (I know, dirty slob) and hope I don't get a wet ear as I still have earache from yesterday. It's pissing me off now!
Shall put on my cheerful face, neck some painkillers and go to the library with DD for a bit.
Back later, lovely ladies! x

Onwards and upwards pickles!

Sorry you are ill, drink plenty of water. there are those rehydration sachets you can take as well, they are good for putting minerals etc back into your body.

Hope you feel better soon. And stay positive xx

How was the ear?

Had a DVD day and feeling better. Dog is giving the folks the run around . Managing dry toast, baby moving well.
Can believe I've missed the sunshine.
Hope were all having a nice Saturday
X

Glad you're feeling better! Ear still sore. Was at a BBQ but had to come home early as DD got the grizzles 'cos she couldn't run around (well with a giant rack of hot coals and loads of forks and glass about it wasn't really safe) and the wind kept blowing on my ear anyway.

Now watching the last of the Olympics, and MN-ing! :)

Ah no... Great excuse for a bit of MNing .

This is the explanation I got for no birthday card:
I bought u a card but i couldnt send it. Friends wish each other happy birthday, i really cant say u are my friend

Grr! I would be so temped to just say F off.

What a nobber!

Managed a little bit of 'networking' when I was out earlier - trying to find out what I might need to know/do for the masters course I have just been accepted onto.

Going to have a lazy day tomorrow, and catch up with my friend with a long phone call. Just had a lovely cup of hot chocolate.

Get your feet up girl, watch the Olympics and chill. xx

Congratulations on getting accepted onto your masters

F off indeed you twunt! Unfortunately someone offending me on another thread tonight might get the brunt of my typing! Stepped away from my emails

Oh no, no Olympics- cuppa and midsomer murders

Sadly as I thought originally, that he didn't think it was right to send one.

He is right, you are not friends. This is what I told my STBXH when he said he wanted us to be friends - We can never be friends, I wouldn't treat my worst enemy the way you treated me-

The same is true of your ex. If he was a friend of any sort he would not have treated you the way he has.

Xx

Am watching the diving and wondering how on earth those tiny trunks give any protection.

And thankyou for the congrats. I had to have something to do for the months ahead, my brain is feeling like mush.

Thank you skye hope your having a nice weekend xx

Can I ask this- is what I've been through bad? Or am I just making a drama? Am I
Making it a bad situation or is it bad? Am I unreasonable? Am I Ill, because I'm
On anti ds or is it all in my head.
Or as on thread got me thinking- am I wrong to be keeping my baby.

No, what you have been through is bad. You are not creating a drama.

Your ex is a total twunt for not standing by you and for being nasty because you won't do what he wants.

You are right to keep your baby because that's what your instinct was. Everybody's circumstances are different and each individual must do what is right for them. If its the thread I'm thinking if, then that poor person has a very difficult decision ahead of them, but ultimately can only do what she thinks is best for her.

You are having a wobble, we all go through it, you will be fine and you will be happy again , as will we all hopefully.

Hello im a new and hope i can join the chit chat :)

Im 20+6 and having a boy called ralph due on christmas eve.

Not with the babys father because he said get rid of it or we wont be together and i will only have one child id want that not this etc etc etc!!!So hes an evil bastard. I dumped him roughly around 8w.

Since then ive been cooked up in my mum and dads house with no-one to talk to. Dont have any close friends or even friends.

But i am happy that ive got a boy and ready for the sleepless nights to begin!!! :)

Hi Xmas. I'm not pregnant but just stalk pickles wherever she goes

Sorry to hear of your story, very similar to pickles.

Welcome to the thread :)

Hi Xmaseve, just wanted to pop on and say good luck with everything. I also did pregnancy single (was not in a relationship when conceived) and had a boy by c section on Xmas eve!
Will you be able to get to an antenatal lesson when the time comes? I was on low income so could sign up to NCT for about £20. They were all married ladies but it was good to have somewhere to go in the early days, as all my friends were miles away too.

Good morning Xmas, I'm pickles, I was/ am in the same position as you. Come and join the ride. I frequently have melt downs on here and get brilliant advice.
We will get you sorted, first of all your job for today is to look up your local sure start centre!
Are you getting support from your doctors? I have counselling.
It's hard I know., I don't go out. I moved back home and even though I have friends here I very very very rarely go out!
Do you have a dog, I find walking mine great.
Pickles x

Ah you're just having a wobble. It's to be expected. It is tough enough with pregnancy hormones shooting round your body without dealing with emotional fallout and all the other crap as a result of unreliable and useless ex's.

Wouldn't it be strange if you discovered that you al lived within 30 mins of each other? You could all meet in person for some hand-holding :)

Hello everyone.

I am going to op for a c-section stomach muscles have parted in alot of pain most the time.

We do have a sure start, i did ask they havent got back to me since 9w!!?

Me and ex bought a dog together so no, a little jack russell called Zara, he took the dog i longer see it :(

I do have chinchillas!! Got 4 i do get one out every day and give him a snuggle :)

Maybe give sure start a ring? that's whose doing my antenatal classes too. Ive struggled to go to my centre but my midwife and health visitor are looking into
It for me (I'm 33 weeks)
Glad you have your pets, mine really brighten up my days. and now you have us!
Mumsnet is an addiction.
How are you doing re housing and baby things?
Where abouts are you in the country?

Morning skye and notgeoff
xmas these ladies are amazing xx