Where have all the fit, interesting and available men gone (part 27)

[ninah]

part 27? good god

On the train home from my date with cyclist - definitely worth getting out of my pyjamas for!!

More details please

yay! The cyclist was worth the wait then!

I have decided to erase the past week. its made my mood much better!

I've decided to erase the past year!

i wouldnt mind erasing today

the results for ds1 are back and his stool sample was ok, so when they told me that i booked him into see the doctor, and now they are referring him to a consultant because they think it may be a gastroenterology problem instead

meanwhile i have the school and the ewo on my case as they say he has low attendance, which of course he would do seeing as term only started in sept and he has had a couple of weeks off (tho if he had been ill in april for example he would have a higher percentage of attendance as there would have been more days he could have attended iyswm)

they want to haul me to a meeting end of next week and provide proof of him going to the doctor

and ffs they are worried about his attendance yet they expect him to miss a lesson to attend the meeting too!

i am cross, i dont know if i will attend or just email them instead, esp as i have kept them informed every step of the way AND asked for school work, which they havent provided

oh and the letter they sent me had a totally different phone number on than my own, so god knows who they have had down as an emergency contact

aside from that, the dog threw up in my car, the cat has a bite mark or gash on his shoulder, so i have to take him to the vet too .....sigh

Lou , see if you can just email them.

i will email them when i have calmed down

its been 2 days though and i am still mad

and now i just got this amazing piece of information dropped on me from exh

"There a Posibility I go away for a year, after 5 years on peoples sofas I will carry on paying rent on this place as I do not want to come back to nothing.
so maybe dd1 can have a free flat.

think about it , it might help her leaving home
exh"

seriously that fucking cock is something else

nothing about the kids at all

fucking wankstain

but a massive HOORAH if he goes

hope he doesnt come back personally, but shit for the kids once again being abandoned by him

Oh lou, that is one rubbish day. Good luck with the school.
Surely though, ex going would be better for the kids, than him being in this country and not bothering to see them, like he does now? He's still a twat, however you look at it.

excellent news about cyclist, lilac.

Oh Lou with/for you. Although echo flf with them being better off with him gone completely rather than here and ignoring them.

My mood hasn't improved much. I have gone twitchy and paranoid like when I've been missed ADs but I haven't been :(

Oh flame (((hugs)))

I was on antibiotics last week, not sure if they have had some knock on effect on my ADs. Going out tonight. I am forcing myself because if I don't I will curl up and hide which I then hate myself for.

Hi all, haven't been on for ages hope you're all okay. I'll catch up with the threads later.

Can someone tell me I've done the right thing. I've been seeing a bloke I met on a dating site for a while. The chemistry and passion was all there, but there were red flags, we didn't see each other that often so I couldn't see if ever being long term plus other things. We hardly ever actually dated, but he text me every day.

Anyway I knew he was still on the site, he was open about it, but his profile was hidden, he said he had friends on there he chatted to. Anyway it was giving me red flags so I decided to set a honeytrap and he fell for it. Although he didn't actually go through with the meeting. I confronted him about it and he basically doesn't think he's done any wrong - its only messages he said.

So that combined with not sure how he felt about me and the distance I finished it. I'm now with a really nice faithful guy and been with him for a few weeks, so why can't I get the other guy out of my head?

@ mrS01, why don't you give yourself a break from dating altogether until you're over the first bloke or are sure you've done the right thing in packing him in - that way you'll know more what you want and won't risk hurting nice faithful guy if he's not really the one you want.

:( lou - hadn't seen all this. Poor Dylan and poor you. The school sounds pretty hopeless really. What else can you do when he's too ill to go in?

As for your exh he never ceases to live down to expectations, does he.

Had date this afternoon, didn't live up to expectations, sadly. Ho hum. Don't know whether Ill see him again.

Flame, sorry you are feeling so grotty. Antibiotics can knock you out of kilter I think. Take it easy on yourself.

Oh well Janos, we'll see what next Friday brings

thanks, i know its better if he isnt about at all, especially from my pov, BUT from their pov they feel hurt again, they just want their dad to be their dad, you know?

i feel ultra stressed today, i havent had a chance to do any housework and still have dinner to start, so better get a move on

mrsS, you probably feel that way because it didnt end how you wanted it to, iyswim?

i should have checked my email before i posted, ex h has replied to my question about when where and what about the kids , with

"well I thought the thought of a free flat for a year, at 18 was something most of us could only dream of.
anyway, if this gets firmed up I'll speak to the kids to explain."

so thats it then ? he can drop something like that into the conversation then refuse to discuss it anymore

i hope he goes away and gets amnesia for good, so the kids have a better chance of not being fucked up by him

He really is a complete shit. How can anyone abdicate responsibility for their kids in such a callous way?

flf lets hope so.

And he has just texted to say how much he likes me. Will need to find a way to let him down gently - not looking forward to that.

So I was in my pyjamas at 7.30 and the train into town left at 8.06. I was ready and just about to leave, but knew DD2 was coming back to pick up clothes for mufti day so I planned to leave them in the cupboard by the front door. Coat on, doorbell rings, train leaves in 15 mins, 8 mins walk. Tis DD2, alone, dad gone to get petrol at Tesco. She wants to take her hamster too, so we are outside the front door with the hamster cage. 13 mins to train, no sign of dad. We start walking to the entrance to the estate, no sign. Still carrying hamster cage, walking towards Tesco, 12 mins to go. Reach Tesco, his car is NOT at petrol station. 10 mins to go. Stand silently cursing at side of road. 9 mins to go. He drives out of main Tesco car park. (Reckon he wanted to make sneaky phone call to gf or top up his condom drawer.) Kiss DD2, abandon hamster on pavement and sprint to station. Run under A4 underpass (6 lanes, might as well cross the M25) and get to station with 3 mins to spare?phew! I was starting to think I was destined never to meet this guy.

So we met at Waterloo, and there is a jazz band playing (for Children In Need) so I told him it was really nice of him to lay on a band for me and he said it was the least he could do! We had a drink in a wine bar, he was really easy to talk to and we laughed a lot. He is good looking and smart and funny and we have a lot in common. Hoping to meet next week for date no. 2 :)

Also had first chat on the phone with H&S man this evening, I can cope with the Brummie accent if he?s as nice as he seems and we?re hoping to meet up before too long. I have next weekend to myself, but he?s away in Cardiff so not sure when we?ll manage it just now.

Out to dinner with my BFF now, catch you all later.

Lou, will keep fingers crossed that ex p*sses off as you would like!

Janos, shame about the date - next!

lou - some men just don't know how to be a proper dad then leave the rest of us to cuddle the children (((()))))

MrsSO1, I agree you need a break to get over one before you start seeing someone else. These blokes on dating sites are ten a penny and they see us the same way, in general, I know there are a few good uns.

Lou, he will never be the dad they want, sometimes its best that kids resign themselves to that, my DD has, and believe me your ex is a heck of a lot better.

Glad it worked in the end lilac!

Hoping booze will help my mood. Will prob give mate phone custody. Drunken carrot texting would probably round off the week!

(((flame)))

i will join you in your not great mood flame :) have one of my beers!

i know they need to resign themselves and all that, and they do try, but they are mostly younger than your dd, so it still gets to them, despite everything

i explained to them that i had similar with my father and i understood how they felt, but it might be best not to expect anything from him, and that they had a stable set up here and dp loved them

which is when they once again asked me to marry dp

he just replied to me asking for some kind of info so i at least can be prepared for when he tells them, as it was unfair to just drop it into convo and leave it like that, and he has replied saying

"ok nevermind.
as i say it needs to be firmed up , if it does i'll give you the details and talk to the kids"

maybe i shouldnt have mentioned his email to them, but imo i think it is better they are prepared for the possibility rather than him dropping it out of the blue, knowing him with about 5 mins notice

dont forget this is the man who called from the airport once as he was getting on the plane and told dd1 to say bye to the others

and they were devastated by it and not knowing it was coming